The Bitter Taste

In Between Dreams

If people are truly, madly, deeply in love with each other, they will find a way.

xxx

"Haley," Peyton had managed to get out as she stood in front of her now former best friend. Peyton had gotten the courage from Karen to go to TRIC and try to settle things with Haley. It had been at least a week since Brooke's bachelorrette party and things with her and Haley had been…Well…Non existent.

Haley, who had been sorting through a bunch of records, looked up at her quickly and mumbled a "hello" which had been the only thing she had spoken to Peyton since the incident in the limo.

"Look," Peyton finally said after a moment of uncomfortable silence, "I know telling you that I loved Lucas was wrong, but…"

Haley snapped her head up and glared at Peyton, "You're right. It was wrong and there's no 'but' about it. Lucas and I are married," she said now raising her voice, "You don't do that to a person."

"Hales you're my best friend," Peyton said with a weak smile on her face.

Haley let out a dry laugh, "Really? So telling me that you're in love with my husband is what a friend does to another friend? Sorry I didn't get that memo," she snapped and then walked away.

Peyton went after her, "I told you because I wanted you to know that I'm not going to try anything with him," she began, "Haley, you're friendship means so much to me and I would never do anything to ruin it."

"You already did," Haley said in a strained voice, "I know you're lonely Peyton okay…But…"

Peyton cut her off, "Yeah I am lonely," she said as she held back tears, "I just want you to not be mad at me anymore."

Haley bit her bottom lip and looked down at the ground, "I have things to do," she said and then walked off.

Peyton felt a hand on her shoulder and turned and saw Lucas standing there; she wiped her eyes quickly and moved so that his hand fell off her shoulder. "She'll be okay," he said referring to Haley, "She's just upset right now…"

"I know," Peyton said as she watched Haley and Brooke laugh and talk to each other, "I didn't mean to mess things up between her and I…I was just being honest."

Lucas nodded and noticed Peyton wouldn't make eye contact with him, "You know Peyt. You and I are close and we'll always be close; and I do love you, but as a friend. We'll always be friends I promise you that."

"I don't think I can be just friends with you Luke," she said tearfully, "I look at you and Haley together and I just think about what you and I could've had…"

"So you're saying we can't be friends?" Lucas asked as he narrowed his eyes and stared at her.

Peyton groaned and put her hands over her eyes, "I need to go home," she said and then walked away.

"Peyton," Lucas said as he went after her, "Peyton!" He screamed louder as he followed her outside to the parking lot.

She finally turned around, "Stop doing this to me!" She screamed loudly and then fell down to the rocky ground and sobbed.

"Stop doing what?" Lucas said as he raised his voice and kneeled down beside her.

Peyton put her head down on her knees and wept, "Just let me walk away," she said in almost a whisper.

"I'm not going to do that," Lucas said, "Please don't run away from things."

"If I don't run away then I'm just going to ruin everything," she stated, "Do you know how I feel when I see the look of disappointment in Haley's eyes? Or how I felt when Jake walked out the door and left me again?"

Lucas rubbed her back softly, "Jake's a complete idiot for leaving you. I respect the guy and he's always been a friend, but him leaving you was probably one of the dumbest things he's ever done."

"It's my fault he left," Peyton said as she breathed heavily.

"Peyton," Lucas began, "Don't blame yourself."

Peyton bit her bottom lip and wiped her eyes with her sleeve, "No Luke," she said, "It really was my fault."

"What?" Lucas said as he looked down at her and stopped rubbing her back.

"I slept with Veronica," Peyton said and then looked down at the ground, "I was so alone…And I don't know it just kind of happened."

Lucas sat back and looked at her, "Are you serious?"

"I know it's weird to think of me getting with some girl, but I just needed someone to care about. I needed somebody to want me," Peyton explained, "Just…Don't think any less of me because of my mistake."

"I could never think any less of you Peyton," he said and then put a comforting hand on the blonde's knee.

Peyton bit the inside of her cheek and got up slowly, "You should get back inside…"

"Where are you going to go?" Lucas asked as he started to get up.

"Anywhere but here," Peyton said teary-eyed and then looked at Lucas for a moment, "You should get back inside."

Lucas shook his head, "I'm not going to let you leave like this," he began, "You're important to me Peyton! And I could never imagine losing you…"

"You say that now," Peyton said softly, "What about when we were together? God Luke we were together for almost 6 years and never once did you want to marry me or want to have kids with me. Why? Why wasn't I good enough for that?" Lucas ran his hand off the top of his head and opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He stood there dumbfounded and looked up at the sky as if he were searching for some kind of answer. Peyton clicked her tongue and shook her head, "Well I guess that explains it all," she said cynically and then stormed away.

Lucas looked at his watch and then walked closer to Peyton so that she could hear him, "What do you want me to say?" He yelled over to her, "I'm married Peyton! I can't have these types of conversations with you!"

"Then leave me alone Luke," Peyton yelled back and then walked up to him with her hands up by her sides, "You're wife hates me so I think I can deal without you in my life. Just let me go home to my son…He's the only guy I need right now," she said sadly and then walked away. This time Lucas let her.

"So what now?" Lucas heard a voice say behind him. He turned around and saw Haley standing there with her arms crossed smoking a cigarette.

He rested his hands in the front pockets of his jeans and squinted, "I thought you quit smoking?"

"And I thought you quit that stupid shit with Peyton," she fired back, "You can't keep being her hero Lucas…She has to learn how to take care of herself."

Lucas looked at Haley, "She's been taking care of herself all her life, Hales. Give her a break."

"Give her a break?" Haley said with a sarcastic laugh, "Yeah that is just what I'll do!"

"Are you drunk?" Lucas asked as he watched his wife stumbled around and as he listened to her words begin to slur.

Haley glared at him, "I waited for you in that club for at least an hour! And then I come outside and you're fucking talking to Peyton?" Haley threw down her cigarette and then got another one out and started to light it.

Lucas grabbed the cigarette out of Haley's mouth and threw it across the parking lot, "Why don't you trust me?"

"I do trust you," Haley said, "I just don't trust you around Peyton," Lucas groaned, "You can't blame me!" Haley exclaimed, "She's in love with you…And you act like it's not big deal."

"Because it isn't!" Lucas began, "Peyton is a lonely girl and she'll reach out to anybody who's there."

Haley bit her bottom lip and looked down at the ground, "Are we ready for this?" She asked Lucas softly; Lucas walked over to Haley and put his arms around her, "Are we ready to become a family?"

"Hales…I love you, and I want to start a family with you," Lucas assured her, "Come here," he said and kissed her softly on the lips.

The kiss lingered and then Haley took a step back, "I can't keep doing this," she said and then wiped her eyes. She looked down at her fingers to see if any mascara marks had been made, "This whole…Fighting, then making up, then crying, then fighting, then making up. It's too much Lucas."

"This is what couples do," Lucas said in a desperate attempt to keep his wife from second guessing herself; he gently put his hands on her shoulders and brought her closer towards him, "Everything's going to be messed up for awhile with this whole Peyton thing, but trust me…It's going to be okay."

Haley shook her head, "Do you really believe that?"

Lucas looked down at her and didn't say a word.

"She's always going to love you," Haley began, "Don't you get it? It's never going to be okay because I think she loves you with everything she's got."

Lucas scoffed, "So you're trying to say that she loves me more than you do?"

"No," Haley said as she turned around and put her face in her hands. She wiped her nose and put her hands on her hips, "I'm exhausted Lucas…Okay? And it makes me sick to think that every time I turn my back Peyton isn't going to be there."

"What are you trying to say?" Lucas asked as he cross his arms tightly across his chest.

Haley bit her bottom lip and looked up at the sky, she sighed and looked back in Lucas's eyes, "I don't know if this is going to work out…"

"Haley," Lucas said in a short breath as his eyes began to tear, "Come on," he said pulling her into a tight hug, "We can work this out. I promise."

Haley kept her hands placed firmly to her side as she tried hardly to hold back her tears, she squirmed out of Lucas's grasp and grabbed his hand and kissed it, "I'm sorry," she said softly, "I just don't think this is going to work out right now."

"So you're asking me for a divorce?" Lucas said as a lone tear ran down his scruffy cheek.

"I don't know what I want," Haley said as she ran her fingers through her hair, "I just…I just can't do this right now," she said and then walked away.

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