Ether for Sale
Or,
Those Who Hunt Moogles

Chapter Four
Second Delivery: Mi'hien Highroad Travel Agency!
aka, The Great Fiend Migration!

"Y'know Teityr," Jymbo said, pausing long enough to huff exhaustedly. "Sometimes I wonder if you're really my grandson."

"I told you, I'm not wasting my money on one of those stupid hovers." Teityr stumbled, barely catching himself. He bent over, breathing hard, head between his knees. "Its ... not ... that ... far ..."

Jymbo's eye twitched. "Ungrateful brat ... forcing your poor old grandpa into that vicious mob, and now making him walk the entire length of the Mi'hien Highroad ..."

"You can't blame that concert fiasco on me! And if you're so upset, why don't you use your money?" Teityr asked. Jymbo sputtered incomprehensibly, and Teityr smiled knowingly. "You don't have any do you?"

"Because!" Jymbo yelled, indignant. "I ... I'm ... saving for our room at the rest stop!" He nodded to himself, apparantly needing reassurance. "Bet you didn't think of that, did you!"

Teityr patted the pouch on his belt. "Actually, I did."

Jymbo's mouth worked, and his eye twitched until Teityr wondered if his grandpa's head would burst. Finally the old man spun on his heel, and started down the road at a brisk pace, not saying anything.

"Of course, neither of us would be this tired if you'd thought to bring along some weapons," Teityr said out loud, reprimanding himself. They'd sprinted almost half the trip, trying to outrun a Shantak, which was joined by several Iron Giants, and then some Wild Wolves, and so on and so on until it seemed the entire Fiend population of the HIghroad was chasing them down. Of course, the Gak family was well-accomplished at fleeing, though it wasn't a trait much respected by the rest of Spira.

The sun was setting fast on the horizon, and Teityr could still hear the yips and yowls of the Fiends tracking them up the path. It wasn't that much farther - he didn't think. It'd been some time since he went to Bob's Walking Shack, a traveller's shop which travelled up and down the highroad. It'd gone out of business right around the time the last High Summoner made her legendary pilgrimage. Teityr didn't believe the new owner had a moving traveller's shop; it didn't seem to be a very smart way to do business.

Once more, the closing yelps and howls cut into his introspection, and Teityr started jogging. Wherever or whatever the shop was now, he hoped it was close.


"What a shakin' disappointment!" Peppor snarled.

"Indeed," Solt agreed sadly. "Not one autograph. She was whiskingly whisked away too fast."

"Jeez, I'm so shakin' sorrily sorry," Shaker growled, putting as much sarcasm and mockery as he could into his voice. "Here, lemme showingly show some shakin' brotherly comfort!" He whapped Solt in the nose, knocking the poor skinny fellow on his backside. Peppor -deceptively quick for his large and stocky frame- made Shaker work for it, but in the end, Shaker popped him in the nose as well. "The next time you freakin' jerks abandon me, I swear, I'll - I'll!"

"Rippingly rip us a new one?" Solt asked, dazed.

"Pound us into the shakin' dirt?" Peppor asked, equally dazed.

Shaker's eye twitched, and he forced himself to take a deep breath and count to ten. "I swear," he began again, "I wll give you the largest pay cut you've ever heard of."

Both his brothers gasped, shocked by his blasphemous statement. He nodded. "I see that we understand each other."


Anuella Gak lifted the bubbling kettle from its place over the fireplace, and uncovered it, taking a deep whiff of the aroma. "And that my dear," she said proudly, "is how you make boiled Ochu."

A tendril raised out of the pot, flailing around helplessly before trying to seize the burly woman, who just laughed and beat it back in with the lid. "Guess its a little under-cooked."

Iya swallowed hard, doing her best to keep her distance from the kettle. "It ah ... certainly smells ... interesting ..." she said.

"Oh my, yes." Dropping the lid on and setting the kettle over the fire again, she wiped her hands on her apron and returned to the kitchen table. "I personally can't stand the stuff, but Jymbo and Teityr eat it like its going out of style."

With the harmful concoction safely tucked away, Iya moved carefully to the table and seated herself across from Anuella. "So you were telling me about Teityr?"

"Yes, yes." Anuella pulled out a deck of cards, and began shuffling quickly. "The boy was much like his grandfather. About the only thing he's interested in is Blitzball. Grew up saying he was going to join the Kilika Beasts. I'm still not a bit surprised he hasn't tried out yet, however."

"He ... hasn't?

"No ... I really think he has his heart set on something else. Losing his parents in that last attack by Sin ..." Anuella shook her head and laid out the cards. "He would've joined up with the Crusaders then and there if Jymbo hadn't stopped him."

Iya stared at her lap, listening quietly. Anuella continued. "But he's getting over it, I think. He'll make a fine Blitzer if he applies himself."

"But um, if he wants to be a Blitzer, why is Jymbo taking him out with him?"

Anuella chuckled. "It would make Jymbo proud to no end to see Teityr pick up the family business. But Teityr isn't the type for that sort of life. He'll never feel right if he doesn't follow his dream ... course, he'll feel guilty if he does try out for Blitz and disappoints his grandpa. And Jymbo ... he hasn't enough work ethic to carry him through with washing that stupid hat, much less selling Ether." She waved dismissively. "They'll be back before the end of the day."

Iya tugged at her skirt fretfully. "I ... I called him a mercenary. I didn't think he cared about what's happening. New Yevon is hiding everything they know, just like before."

"That's religion for you," Anuella said, starting her game, laying the cards out for Solitaire.

The door shuddered as someone banged loudly. With a grumble, Anuella started to stand, when Iya waved quickly. "I'll get it, Missus Gak."

"Thank you dear," Anuella said, sitting down again.

Iya almost reached the door when it burst inwards, and Yevon guards trained rifles on her. She stopped cold, staring at the Machina fearfully. "Missus Gak!"

Mep shoved past the soldiers, and lifted his hands in the prayer. "Anuella, so nice to see you again."

"Are you going to do this everytime Jymbo leaves the house?" Anuella said, not looking up from her card game.

He continued as though he hadn't heard her. "Unfortunately, your husband has been involved in terroristic activities. Assaulting loyal soldiers of Yevon. Allying himself with Youth League scum."

Iya's fists clenched angrily when he looked her over, making certain she knew the insult was for her.

"Oh please." Anuella folded her hands across her belly and leaned back. "You know Jymbo hasn't the motivation for that sort of thing. You're just making excuses to try your hand at seducing me again."

Iya's jaw dropped at the same moment all the soldiers did. Mep just smiled and shook his head. "Anuella, we're seizing your home until we finish our investigation. You're welcome to stay at our temple ... I wouldn't want a woman of your ..." he licked his lips lasciviously, "... status to be subjected to the trickery of the Youth League."

Jymbo's wife laughed loudly, and slapped her knee loudly. "Your boys can search around me. You better warn 'em though ..." She grinned toothily and clacked her teeth together.

"Kilika girls are born knowing how to handle men." She went back to her card game. Iya looked back and forth between her and Mep, who was shivering furiously.

"Turn it over," Mep said when he regained control. "And make sure to search this Youth League pup. No doubt she's got something to hide."

"Mep, do you remember the last time you ruined my card game?" Anuella asked softly, not looking up. "... I can see your hair never grew back."

He grabbed his head, the sound of his hand slapping against bare skin echoing loudly through the house, and he hissed, "This isn't over!" He stalked out, and the New Yevon soldiers grabbed Iya roughly, searching her a little more thoroughly then the situation merited. Then pushing her to the side, they began to ransack the house, ripping off cupboard doors and flipping over the furniture.

Anuella continued her card game, while Iya stood in the corner, shivering with rage. From where she stood, she could see the tears in Mrs. Gak's eyes.


W'ont Wor'ky had placed the 'Closed' sign in the window. He sniffed loudly, and scrubbed at his eyes furiously. The Youth League was amassing at Mushroom Rock Road, and he'd tried to sell his wares to each person who'd passed, but to no avail. The children in the League that laughed at him as they ran past was the final straw.

"Grr!" W'ont raised a fist to the air. "Why in Spira should a Wor'ky put up with this?! I need a break." He picked up the carrying case - as a good Wor'ky never left his wares behind - and hefted it onto his back. He set off down the road. The brisk air was starting to make him feel better. Well enough that he tipped his hat to a sentry machina guarding the path, even though he wasn't too fond of them.

His mood dissipated, however, when approaching the Traveller's Rest. A black cloud was forming on the horizon, and several citizens were standing atop a hill just across from Rin's, trying to get a better look.

He squinted hard, trying to understand why everyone was staring. It looked like an ordinary raincloud ... His eyes widened, and his jaw dropped. That was no rain cloud, that was -

"FIENDS!" a nimble dwarf howled, charging towards the rest stop. A younger, taller man followed close behind, and just behind him, snapping at their heels, were several dozen of every type of Fiend on the Highroad. Which added up to hundreds, maybe even a thousand Fiends. Sentry Machina hobbled away from the building, and attacked. The two people running ducked past them, and the monster horde swallowed them whole.

Everyone standing near the Inn shrieked in terror, and fled, some barreling over the side and into the ocean, others ducking into bushes, and a few began beating ineffectually on the door to the Traveller's stop.

W'ont Wor'ky started grinning, lifting his case. All he had to do was use the NotaSword and NotArmor to slay the ravaging Fiends, and then his wares would become legendary. he could charge triple price!

He reached for the clasp, but handle suddenly broke, dropping the heavy case. W'ont reached for it again, and took it by the corners, but just before opening it, the two men flew past him, knocking him aside. He stumbled awkwardly, holding onto the case desperately. Barely stopping himself next to the sheer drop that would send him plummeting into the ocean, Won't lifted a hand and wiped at his brow.

"Whew."

The Fiends, ignoring everyone except their prey, knocked Won't over the cliff's edge. Well, he thought bleakly, the ocean rushing up to meet him, I still have my wares.


"We just passed the Travel Agency!" Teityr yelled, looking back over his shoulder. The Fiends were a wall of black, swallowing (not in the literal sense) everything that got in their paths.

"Nevermind! I recognize the name!" Jymbo gasped. He was too out of breath to explain, and Teityr didn't care enough to ask. As they ran, a bridge gradually came into sight. "Quick! We an jump off there!"

They sprinted ahead, using almost the last of their strength. Skidding to a halt, Teityr grabbed his grandfather's arm. "Are you nuts? You'll get killed!"

Jymbo peered over the edge. "Hmm..." They both looked up as a Machina jogged upthe bridge, placing itself between them and the Fiends.

"FIEND ATTACK...PHASE ONE: SCAN! ...SCANNING..." it said in a loud, buzzing voice. "BZZT! WARNING! TOO MANY TARGETS! PHASE TWO: CALCULATING ODDS...BZZT! PHASE THREE: DEFEND HUMAN LIFE..." It looked at them, and then at the oncoming Fiends. "SCREW THAT!" The Machina turned back around, and rushed for the bridge, leaping off with one last "BZZT!" Jymbo and Teityr followed it with their eyes, flinching when it hit the ground.

"I didn't know a Machina could still function with no legs..." Jymbo mused. The Machina in question was crawling slowly away, pieces trailing from wires dangling from its broken torso.

Teityr dropped to his knees and covered his head. "We're gonna die..." Jymbo grabbed the railing, preparing to go the route of the Machina. "If I don't have legs, I can't do this kind of work!" A little happier then he should have been, he stepped up onto the railing.

The Fiends slowed, and slowed, and the finally stopped about a yard from both Gak's. They stood panting, glaring at the two humans they'd chased for so long. Then, in thunderous union, they all collapsed, and moved no more.

Teityr lifted his head, and gawked. "B-but....that's impossible!" The Fiends were already dissolving into a mass of Pyreflies, flowing into the sky, changing the color of the horizon all the way to Djose.

He jumped up, shielding his eyes from the brightness - so many Pyreflies at once was truly blinding. "Gramps, check this out!"

There was no response, so Teityr turned around. "Gramps?" He swallowed hard, and looked over the edge. "Gramps?!"

"Ow..." Jymbo moaned from far below. "That big thump they all made knocked me down! I've fallen and -"

"Don't say it!" Teityr yelled back. He glanced down the road, and then back up towards the Travel Agency. "Gramps, it'll take too long on foot! I'll head back and rent a hover! I'll be down in a jiffy!"

"Teityr?! Teityr?!" Jymbo howled. "Curse you Teityr! There are Machina down here poking me! Help!"

Teityr stopped at the Travel Agency, and made his delivery. There was a young Al Bhed woman at the counter, who bowed and apologized profusely.

"I'm so sorry," she said, "the former employee here was cowardly and locked the door, shutting several customers outside. He must've lost the confirmation forms for the delivery too."

"Right..." Teityr said slowly. "Yeah ... that's what ... must've happened ..."

"Liar, kupo," Mog said, his voice muffled by the pack. The attendant arched an eyebrow curiously, but Teityr elbowed his pack and leaned over the counter, smiling.

"Hey, I don't suppose you could do me a really big favor, and not tell anyone about that big Fiend chase a while ago?"