So there I was. Lunch hour at school, in the back of the Xterra, in my panties. I didn't even have any gym clothes to change into, since I didn't have phys-ed this semester.
I think the proper term was up shits creek without a paddle.
"Veronica…" Logan's voice trailed off. He still hadn't met my eyes, obviously preferring to stare at my torn skirt.
"Don't Logan. Just. Don't." I pulled the tattered remnants of my skirt and dignity around me and opened the side door a bit to check and make sure the coast was clear.
The parking lot's deserted, I take a deep breath and move to slide to the ground, still clutching my skirt when Logan's voice stops me.
"Veronica, I didn't mean for this to happen." I'm not waiting for whatever else he has to say. I don't want to hear how much he regrets what just happened between us.
"Forget about it Logan." I mumble and I'm out the door, hurrying to my car across the lot. It's definitely time to go home and change, and of course skip school for the rest of the afternoon.
It would figure I'd share the only sexual act I actually remember with Logan. At least it isn't incest. I'm giggling to myself, slightly hysterical as I lean my head against the steering wheel.
He regrets it. I knew, no matter what Lilly said, I knew he was still hung up on her. How could he not be hung up on the fabulous Lilly Kane. I can feel the wetness on my cheeks, trembling fingers moving up to brush them away when I hear a knock on my window.
I start the car and put it in drive without turning to see who it is. I don't want to talk to anyone right now. As I'm pulling out of the parking lot I can't help but look in my rear-view mirror and see Logan standing where my car had been. Watching me drive away.
You're not surprised are you? When things get difficult that's how I deal. I run, take some time for myself, and avoid the situation until I'm better able to handle it. I admit not the best coping mechanism, but it's worked for me so far.
My Dad was home for lunch when I got there. It was fun explaining my little clothing mishap to him. Thank God Dad's so understanding. I lied through my teeth. Told him I'd caught the damn skirt on the edge of a lunch table. He'd called the school to let them know I wouldn't be there for the rest of the afternoon. He thought I was humiliated over the student body seeing my underwear.
I felt sick to my stomach for lying to my Dad, but what choice did I have?
"Honey? Dinner's ready." My Dad knocked softly on the door. I'd been in my room all day, hugging my pillow and wallowing in self pity.
I was still trying to figure out a way to get out of going to school tomorrow. I didn't want to see anyone. I still wasn't sure what I was going to do about Dick.
"I'll be there in a second Dad!" I quickly wiped the tears away and made my way out to the kitchen. Dad's still in his uniform from work and an idea strikes me.
"Dad? Can I talk to you for a minute before Dinner?" I make my voice suitably hesitant as I question him from the doorway to the kitchen.
"Of course." His voice is concerned and I feel even worse for the lie I told him this afternoon, but first things first.
I take a deep breath to centre myself and carefully choose my words, "You remember Shelly Pomroy's party? The one I went too with Lilly?" My voice is still trembling and his face is growing more and more concerned. Buck up, Veronica, you can do this.
"Yes. The one you didn't come home from?" Dad's voice is starting to have a darker edge to it, like he knows I'm going to tell him something horrible.
I hesitate for a moment before I continue. My voice, at least, has gotten stronger, "I kind of figured out I have a crush on Logan, and I know you don't like him Dad but I really like him, and please, please just give him a chance, he hasn't been drinking at all lately, and he's been really sweet to me and I think I really want to date him and…" I cut off as my Dad burst out laughing.
"You, you…" he trailed off after a moment his face red with mirth, "You had me really worried Veronica! I kind of figured out the you liking him part already. You invited him for dinner remember?" He smiled at me and pulled me close for a hug.
I love the way my Dad smells and every time he pulls me in close I can't help but inhale deeply. He smells like home.
"We'll see about Logan. I can't stop you, as you very well know. But! Until he proves otherwise, curfew is nine o'clock on weeknights, and ten o'clock on weekends." He ruffled my hair when I gave an indignant squawk.
"DAD! I haven't had a nine o'clock curfew since I was like twelve!" My voice came out shrill, as I pushed him away.
"Fine. Curfew stays the same, but he comes into the house to get you and comes in when he brings you home. One sniff of alcohol on his breath and he's through, got it?" His voice got all stern. My Dad loves me, it's not hard to tell, but he's scary sometimes.
"Nothing's set yet Dad. I'm not even sure how he… I'm not even sure if he likes me yet." I'd made up my mind. I was going to make a serious play for Logan. Lilly or no Lilly. Crying wasn't going to solve all my problems and there was something there. I wasn't sure what yet, but something at least.
"He'd be crazy not to like you Veronica and you know it." He hugged me again as we made our way to the kitchen where my mother was waiting.
I had Dad's blessing. I still, to this day, feel horrible about lying to him… but really? How do you tell your Dad 'I ripped my skirt having sex with Logan in the back seat of his car.' Dad's just wouldn't take that well, or at least mine wouldn't.
After Dinner that night I set to planning. Thank God I'm better at planning than Lilly.