Author's note: I promised The Weaving Wheel that I'd post this before Xmas, so I'm slaving!

12

Mike backed off quick when an Oompa-Loompa walked behind him to tug on Wonka's jacket and whisper something in his ear.
"Oh really?" Wonka asked him, "Oh good!"
Letting his hand fall to his side, Mike eyed them both suspiciously.
"I've just been informed that the incinerator is broken, so there should be about three weeks of rotten garbage to break their fall!"
"Well," said Mr Teavee sarcastically, "That's good news."
"Yeah."
Mike shuddered; he had said it cheerfully, but he had turned away with a look of disappointment. Wonka was a freak, and Mike needed to prove it. His dad appeared creeped out by him too, but he was too weak-willed to speak up about it, and the Fraily family seemed to actually respect him.
"Well," said Wonka, "Let's keep on truckin'."
He led them over to a glass elevator and pushed a button which illuminated and gave a small 'ding'. The doors opened and they filed inside.
"I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier, the elevator is by far the most efficient way to get around the factory."
Mike looked around and had a fairly clear idea of why Wonka had failed to mention this before; the elevator was conveniently just big enough for the five of them…
"There can't be this many floors," he said, looking at the thousands of buttons that decorated the walls.
"How do you know, Mr Smarty-Pants?" Wonka replied. Mike glared at him.
BECAUSE IT'S PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE!
"And this isn't just an ordinary up and down elevator, by the way, this elevator can go sideways, longways, slantways and any other ways you can think of."
Sure…
"You just press any button, and whoosh, you're off!"
Giggling, he pressed a button and they shot off. Mike was thrown sideways and had only two places to fall onto; a wall covered in buttons or Wonka. He risked the wall.

He regained his balance in the centre of the elevator which soared upwards then plummeted down, breaking to a juddered halt before sweeping away to the right. It steadied to a regular pace and Mike was able to look around him. It looked like they were outside. There was a huge mountain with a snow and mist backdrop. It reminded Mike of a level in one of his video games, except this was far, far more beautiful.
It was eerie – even a little scary – to be standing in a glass-bottomed elevator looking down at a 200 foot drop. Mike was expecting any minute for Wonka to push another button to release a trap-door. He'd seen weirder things during his time at this freak of a factory.
"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Fudge Mountain!"
Typical, thought Mike, One of the most decent places here and he names it after chocolate.
He looked out and saw two Oompa-Loompas wave at them. He pulled a face and looked away. The mist glided past the glass walls like fingers being run through silk curtains. It was hypnotic. His mind wandered to other things. How Violet could still be with him. How Claire would have loved to be here. How he would so much like to be holding one of them in his arms as they drifted around the snowy-topped mountain. He shook his head rapidly to get rid of those thoughts, put the giddy sensation down to the elevator ride and brought his attention back to reality where they were re-entering the factory. To see some sheep. Pink sheep. Being sheared. Wonka had some serious explaining to do.
"Oh!" he exclaimed. Mike, along with everyone else, turned to face him expectantly. He looked at Scruffy, then at Mike, then his face fell, "I'd rather not talk about this one."
Probably wise, Mike thought as he saw a new sheep being brought in to be sheared. He turned round again and looked down to see two rows of beds, Oompa-Loompas dressed in red and white, and several familiar-looking, burnt out puppets being wheeled along on gurneys.
"This is the Puppet Hospital and Burns Centre," Wonka announced, "It's…relatively new."

The elevator began to pick up speed again as they found themselves outside again. Mike's arm slammed into the wall, miraculously missing any buttons, when it stopped suddenly. His stomach gave a horrible lurch as they plunged down into a room labeled 'administration'. He felt a hand on his shoulder. It was his dad, he could tell. He was giving the same grip as he gave when he delivered his nightly Mike-it's-really-time-for-you-to-go-to-bed-now speech. Mike glanced back at him. He looked very ill. Fast movement had never agreed with him. When Mike had been seven, his parents had taken him to a theme park and he had complained that wanted to go on the biggest ride. After relentless moaning, his mother agreed to go on it with him, but Mike refused. He knew she would scream like a baby and embarrass him, so he tugged at his dad's jacket and yelled and stomped his foot until his dad gave up and went on it. Afterwards, Mike wished he had just taken his mum. His dad had been silent for the whole ride apart from the odd groan. Mike hadn't been able to enjoy himself at all; he thought his dad was being quite selfish.
"Ah, the administration offices!"
That was a load of crap, wasn't it? His dad wasn't being selfish at all, was he?
"Hello, Doris!"
Mike barely registered the Oompa-loompa in drag. He was thinking about all his parents had done for him. Doing things for him that they didn't want to do, putting up with his anger and sarcasm, feeding him, clothing him. And for what? Did Mike show the slightest bit of gratitude?
Well…no…

The elevator lurched off again, snapping Mike out of his reverie. He staggered forward but managed to avoid hitting the wall again. They entered yet another room. This one looked slightly more interesting. Darkness except for regular explosions – just what Mike was used to. They fell again, but this time it was different. He'd been rocked about so much, he was getting used to it. It was even getting quite bland.
He took the opportunity of the long silence to ask a question that had been bugging him since they had left the Chocolate Room: "Why is everything here completely pointless."
Maybe he was competing with someone to give the dumbest reply known to man, or maybe he was dumb. Whatever the reason, Scruffy gave the lamest explanation, "Candy doesn't have to have a point. That's why it's candy."
"It's stupid!" Mike retorted, "Candy is a waste of time."
"And computer games aren't a waste of time?" Scruffy asked. Mike's eyebrows rocketed upwards; he wouldn't have thought Scruffy capable of such sarcasm. He was knocked speechless. His head screamed. Mike Teavee was without a witty reply to some kid who didn't seem rich enough to even own a TV.
"Calm down, Charlie," Fraily McFrailson said, "His sort can be difficult, but you have to accept them for who they are, remember that."
"What's up with him?" Mike's dad said about Wonka, giving Mike a diversion from landing his fist right into Fraily's stomach. Wonka had drifted off again. This prompted a query from Mike.
"Don't you think he's out to get us?"
"Excuse me?" Scruffy replied.
"Oh, don't tell me you don't see it! What about the others! They didn't just disappear of their own accord."
"Well, I think they did. If they had just listened to Mr. Wonka…"
"OK, maybe if they'd listened they might have been safe, but don't you think Wonka wants it this way?"
"No."
Mike sighed in frustration and turned to his dad, "You believe me, right?"
"Well…"
"You don't, do you? What about the boat! That only had enough room because The Blob…I mean, Augustus and Mrs Gloop were forced out! And this elevator wouldn't have fitted us all in before!"
"I think it's just coincidence, Mike," Mr Teavee replied.
Mike looked at Fraily and Scruffy who both nodded in agreement. He pouted, "Fine. Get yourself killed. See if I care. World's probably better off without you anyway."
"Mike!" his father scolded. Mike paused.
"Go to hell."
Mike preoccupied himself by reading the names of the different rooms whilst doing the 'count from one to ten' exercise his anger management counselor had suggested to him. One room caught his eye: MONEY-MAKING ROOM. That was sure to appeal to Scruffy! He'd be tempted, he'd suffer from it somehow, and Mike would be proved right! He span round.
"I wanna pick a room," he said loudly to wake Wonka up. He looked dazed for a moment before quietly saying, "G'ahead."
Mike started to turn back round but his attention was grabbed by another button: TELEVISION ROOM. Too perfect…

Mike pressed the button, a ghost of a smile playing on his lips. Wonka was in for it this time…

A/n: Television Room scene next up – the one I've been looking forward too. You're all probably reading this after Christmas, but I'm writing it before so…MERRY XMAS!