(A/N First of the two-parter coming right up!

Disclaimer: I'm deprived, I don't own Doctor Who. This means I'm not making a profit from the following document. It was written for pure amusement value only. Doctor Who is © the BBC.)

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4 – I'm going to 10 Downing Street!

So much for trying to be back before Rose's mum worries. The year. He missed. Did he ever pass a test for this machine? What was it again? The

Terrible At Really Disguising Itself, Sadly. (Thank you, Crystalkey, who thought of this one!).

So he gets questioned by the authorities for 'abducting' Rose. Not that he did much actual abducting. Never mind. Trouble-on-legs takes responsibility for the year's absence. As well he should, since it was his poor aiming that landed them there. Strangely enough, the policeman asks if they've been sleeping together. What business is that of his? (At this point, you can practically hear most of the fanfic writers yelling 'YES!' and jumping up and down on their sofas triumphantly.) However, all of their excitement is dimmed when both of them violently deny the suggestion.

Don't worry though writers (A/N Although I personally doubt it) maybe they just aren't telling the officer something. Our Time Lord still gets slapped by Jackie though. What? Did she want them to say 'yes'?

Jackie then gets very annoyed at Rose for not telling her where she's been for the past year. Yeah, can you just imagine it?

'Well, mum, you see, this guy I'm with, he's an alien and he's got this spaceship that also travels in time. It's called the 'Tips (to) Abduct Rose, Definitely Involve Spaceships', or something like that, a TARDIS anyway. So, we've been to the future and the past and it's quite hard to send a letter. We wanted to be back sooner, but he's pretty poor at aiming that thing, so this is the best we could do.'

Yeah, I can really see that working. Rose agrees with me and stays quiet.

Later, on a random unspecified wall which is quite high up, she complains about it to her alien. She's the only person who knows about spaceships and aliens and she can't say anything. Right on cue, a spaceship flies overhead. The BBC's CGI department get some bonus points for this and proceed to show off by flying the ship over the city for a bit before crashing it into Big Ben. Completely ruining the clock tower and costing the department rather a lot of money. Rose is understandably fairly annoyed.

No, just because you go round with a time-hopping alien you can't go backstage on this scene, Rose. Why not? Because our Time Lord is a fraidy-cat about getting caught. Never mind, just go watch it on BBC News 24. Or Blue Peter, whichever the kid wants. You can understand the Doctor not doing 'domestic' with that household. So he's off on a 'wander'. Yeah, right. I don't think so. Rose doesn't believe that either.

But anyway, he gives her the slip and goes for his 'wander': i.e., race to the TARDIS controls and head straight for the scene of action. Mickey runs out, yelling for him to stop but our alien doesn't hear him. Although, I reckon he did and went anyway. It'd be the sort of thing he'd do.

With his usual sense of direction (which rivals his sense of timing), Trouble-on-legs walks directly into a room full of people with guns. They point them at him. Argh! Babe's on the loose! Rabid pig!

BANG!

…And they say I overreact…

An unimportant character dies while the BBC spend some more on their CGI aliens and at the same time explain how the Prime Minister is, in fact, evil.

Our Last Surviving Time Lord (and not that for much longer, if he carries on the way he's been going.) runs off with half an answer and scuttles his ship back to where he left, in the hopes that no one's noticed his absence. Fat chance, mate. And you appeared in front of someone who didn't know that you were an alien. Until now, at any rate. Great going. What were you going to do for an encore? Get the army after you, pointing guns and trying to arrest you? … I shouldn't have said that. I really shouldn't have said that.

And Jackie rings up the emergency alien hot line because… he's an alien and she thinks it's an emergency. Fair enough. Oh no! His

'Terrific Attractant foR Dangerous (and) Incredible Situations' (Again, credit goes to Crystalkey for this, I love it!) sets off a 'code 9'.

Red Alert! The Doctor's in town! We told you he was trouble! He's dangerous! So the army people point some more guns at him. Sweet move, arresting the only person (cough alien! cough) who can stop the evil dudes.

So they take him away. And the pretty girl standing next to him. Not the dweeb hiding behind the trashcans though.

And then they place this 'dangerous, possibly hostile' alien in close proximity to the most important people in the country right now. Yeah, smart. Good thing he is a good guy (alien!) really. They take him away to plan with. Not the pretty girl though. No, leave her to find the poorly-hidden body. Then attempt to dispose of her using some more cool graphics.

So… what should they do with this Time Lord who's currently figuring out all their plans? Show him what he's up against of course! And then electrocute him for good measure…. Ok, you weren't kidding.

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Summary of the Synopsis: The world's still in danger and they haven't been blown up yet. But don't worry, it's a two-parter. They'll get blown up next episode.

I promise.

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A/N I'm greedy, I want some more reviews (plus TARDIS acronyms!) I'm going to go fly a plane! (One of my presents was a flying lesson!). I should be back before Saturday!