In Hand and Foot

By Michael Weyer

Apologies for lateness in update, a bit of writer's block and other fics but hoping to catch up with this.

Also a note that the TV Tropes page for this now has a "Characters page" to add onto for fun.

"GOONGALA!"

With that bizarre cry, Casey Jones leapt off the platform, his hockey stick smashing into a Foot mask. He spun around to strike a Hand ninja and was soon wading into the battle. Despite his lack of actual martial arts knowledge, his strength, guts and pure wild fervor were letting him more than hold his own in the battle. The Turtles were invigorated by his arrival to pick up the pace in their own fighting.

The portal crackled once more as another figure stepped out. She was a strikingly beautiful redhead woman in a nearly solid yellow jumpsuit. She was shaking her head as she pulled a sword from the scabbard on her back. "Dammit, Casey, I told you to wait for me!"

"April!" Donatello said with a grin as he smashed his staff onto a ninja. "Great to see you!'

"Good to see you guys too," April O'Neill said with a smile as she waded into the fray. While her experience with a sword was limited, one did not hang around four ninja turtles without picking up some tricks and she was able to handle herself as well.

"Do I even want to know?" Misty sighed.

"April O'Neill," the redhead introduced herself. "News reporter." She slashed her sword to cut a Hand ninja down.

"I guess the news business is a lot harsher on your world," Misty remarked. "And Wayne Gretsky on steroids?"

"Casey Jones," Raphael stated. "The coolest guy in the world!" The masked man gave the turtle a high five before smashing his stick into the face of a Foot ninja to send him flying back. Nearby, the Punisher was still unleashing blasts from his machine guns to cut several ninjas down. Baxter Stockman was moving only to be grabbed by his wings and yanked back by the Shredder. "Stockman!" he snarled. "You miserable worm!"

"Fly!" the scientist automatically corrected.

"You dare betray me?"

"Please, how many times have you tried to kill me?" Stockman fired back. "Besides, if I have to be utterly frank, Jones scares me more than you do, that man is a lunatic."

Shredder snarled as he clutched his throat with Baxter holding up a clawed hand. "Ah, ah, ah….I am the only person who happens to have a way back home…"

Shredder snarled. "The price?"

Stockman looked at the chaotic battle around them. "Perhaps we can discuss this in a better setting?"

"Stockman, you miserable backstabbing weasel!" April snapped.

"Fly!"

The Punisher unleashed another blast from his machine gun before backing up, elbowing a ninja down. Luke stepped before April to deflect a few of the stray bullets with April amazed to see the rounds bouncing off of him. Donatello was smashing his staff into a Hand's face before stabbing the other end into the stomach of a Foot. He lifted it up to send the guy flying into the air to smash into a nearby table. Daredevil was leaping over one to smash his boot into a Hand's face while Coleen was working back to back with April cutting down other ninjas.

While Casey was not a trained fighter, his sheer exuberance was making up for it, his hockey stick flying about as he smashed anyone in his path. Luke was charging ahead to tackle Rocksteady, pushing the rhino back and into a nearby wall. He punched him in the face, actually wincing at the hard skin but kept it up. Jessica was lashing out with a kick as the Gorgon waded into the mix, his swords flashing. Leonardo was moving to intercept them just as Colleen leaped forward. Both of them were barely able to keep up from the whirling blades moving at nearly inhuman speed. Colleen winced as one cut at her upper arm but was grateful the Gorgon was too obsessed with proving his skills with a blade to make the much simpler move of simply removing his blindfold to end this fast.

Daredevil was sent knocked back by a blow, leaning on a bench. He shook his head to clear it when something caught his ear. Matt blinked as he cocked his head. "Did I take a blow to the head or does anyone else hear…music?"

Danny frowned. "It's not just you." Sure enough, a bright and rather upbeat musical beat was starting to fill the air. It sounded like the sort of song someone would mix in their bedroom. The fighting slowed as everyone looked around in confusion to the lyrics playing.

"Can she climb….up a tree? Yes she can…easily…Find some nuts…eat some nuts…Kick bad guys…evil butts…Life is like an acorn…Where there's a city crime-torn…that's where you find…"

Bursting into the chamber was a young woman with light brown hair, her massive smile featuring a large set of teeth at the front of her mouth. She wore a dark brown bodysuit with darker leggings, a yellow belt and a light brown bomber jacket. Prominent was the large tail extending from the small of her back. What appeared to be a small pair of ears attached to a headband rested in her hair as she let out a yell alongside the final lyric of the song playing from her iPod.

"Here comes the Squirrel Girl!"

Leonardo stared at the newcomer, then over to Luke. "I fully realize how this is going to sound coming from me but…this is weird."

"What the hell?" Luke blurted.

The woman saw several Hand moving at her and reached into her pocket. She pulled out a small squirrel that fit into the palm of her hand. "Plan M-59 Tippytoe!" The squirrel let out a squeak as the woman pitched him out like a fastball. He latched onto the face of a ninja and began clawing at his eyes. The woman herself let out a high-pitched yell mixed with a screech as she charged into the fray to knock several ninjas back. "I hope you all like rhyming couplets because my justice is poetic!"

"Who the hell are you?" Misty demanded.

The woman threw a Hand ninja into a Foot one before kicking another back. "Me?" She stood proudly with her fists on her hips in a heroic pose. "I'm the Unbeatable Squirrel Girl!" Her tail flew back behind her to smack Bebop in the face.

"When did my life stop being normal?" Misty asked no in particular.

April let out a sigh herself as she ducked a sword swing to punch a Foot in the face. She then watched as Misty lifted one ninja off his feet with her bionic arm and threw him into another. "I hear you, lady."

Squirrel Girl was leaping into the fray once more, literally jumping off the head of two ninjas to kick at a third. She ducked another to pick up a table. "Watch it, buddy! I have the proportional strength and agility of a squirrel!"

"Did she really just say that?" April asked. "Leo, seriously, what kind of world is this?"

"This is nothing. Wait till we tell you about the super-heroes."

"They have super-heroes?"

"Complete with costumes and a tower HQ!"

"Why haven't you gone to them for help?"

"Even she's saying it!" Jessica snapped.

The Gorgon was moving away from Leonardo and back toward the Shredder. The Foot leader was standing up to block his sword blows and the two dueled it out once more. "Skilled," the Gorgon stated. "But not enough." He stabbed outward with blinding speed with the Shredder hissing as his arm was slashed by the blade. The Gorgon was moving in for the kill when Squirrel Girl leaped into his way. "Hey, hey, this is not nice! Slashing people is not fun!"

"Out of my way, child," the Gorgon hissed.

"Ya know, I count myself a people person but you're just…mean." Squirrel Girl ably ducked one slash of his sword and then leapt upward to avoid another. The Gorgon cursed as he decided it was time to end this farce once and for all. He reached up to grab at his bandanna, preparing to remove it and unleash his petrifying gaze on everyone in his path.

In mid-air, Squirrel Girl's tail flowed out and somehow latched itself onto Shredder's faceplate. It yanked to pull it right off, Shredder jerking about and reflexively turning as he covered his scarred mouth. Squirrel Girl spun around as her tail swung to show off the plate's mirrored surface just as the Gorgon removed his bandanna.

Squirrel Girl spun back and stopped in place. Standing before her was a solid statue of the Gorgon, his expression frozen in a look of utter disbelief as if unable to realize how he'd seen his own gaze reflected back at him. Tippytoe leaped over to crawl up the statue and made a small chirping noise. "Wow, that really worked out," Squirrel Girl mused as she dropped the faceplate. Shredder quickly grabbed it to reattach it to his helmet.

She turned to face the Shredder. "Okay, better give up now or you'll get worse!"

The Shredder raised an eyebrow. "Do not even try to pretend you intended for that to happen!" She merely shrugged in response.

The sight of their leader transformed into stone swept over the Hand quickly. It wasn't helped when Rocksteady charged forward and smashed the statue to pieces with a blow. The Shredder gave a rare grateful nod his aide before barking out in Japanese. As one, the Foot moved quickly to his side. Stockman was fiddling with his device. "Here we go, a short-range hop…." In a huge flash of light, they were gone.

By the time the light faded, the Hand had also vanished with the remains of the Gorgon carried with them. "Seriously, how do they even do that?!" Misty complained.

"Trade secret," Leonardo stated. "We'd tell you but…"

"You'd have to kill us?'

"No!" Leonardo seemed insulted. "Just sue you."

"I'll handle that," Matt said, the only one not affected by the light flash.

Squirrel Girl was frowning at the vanishing ninjas but shrugged. "Welp, it appears my job here is done!" She looked over the Turtles with little surprise. "Now, are you humans turned into turtles or is it the other way around?"

"Other way," Donatello answered her. He looked her over. "And what's your story?"

"No time to tell it, I've got stuff to do!" She let out a whistle as Tippytoe raced up to crawl onto her shoulder. "Until next time, my fellow vanquishers of evil!" She made a salute before leaping to scale up a shelf and then up the wall to leave via the skylight on the roof, humming to her theme song as she went. "Is she tough? Listen, bub, she's got partially squirrel blood! Who's her friend? Don't ya know! His name is Tippytoe…"

Casey lifted up his hockey mask to show his handsome face. "Damn, you guys are making some weird friends."

The Punisher was kicking over a corpse as he spoke. "This is why I'm working alone."

"Not right now," Misty said, raising her gun at him. "In case you forgot, you're under arrest!"

He just looked at her and grunted. "There's a damn war going on here, Knight. You wanna waste time bringing me in?"

"He's got a point," Danny said. "Besides, we all know he'll just kill a few guys in lockup and then escape." As much as she hated to admit it, Misty knew Danny was right and reluctantly lowered her gun.

"Can we shelve this until we can get back home?" Leonardo piped up.

"And stop for pizza on the way," Michelangelo spoke up.

"We have no time for pizza!" Luke barked at him. He became aware of four Ninja Turtles all giving him expressions ranging from surprise to anger. "Dude…there's always time for pizza," Michelangelo said in a tone that left no argument.

"That happened, right? I mean…I didn't hallucinate it? That all really did just happen?"

Jessica seemed unsure of herself as she followed the group back to the sewer base of the Turtles. It was cramped as ever but still enough room for the group to pile in. "Because I'm wrapping my head around how this supposedly bad-ass immortal warrior just got beat by a lady dressed like a squirrel."

"That was…bizarre," Colleen agreed. "Still, the rumors are that the Gorgon has returned from death before."

Luke gave her a disbelieving look. "The guy is literally a pile of rocks right now!"

Colleen waved a hand around. "And half the people in this room were dust and returned." Luke frowned as he had to concede the point.

Splinter offered a small smile from his seated position as he saw the group enter. "Miss O'Neil. Mr. Jones. It is good to see you again."

"Hey, Splinter," April replied with a grin. "Glad to see you too. It's been a total mess since you guys vanished. It took us a while to figure out what was happening. We tracked down Stockman who had already discovered it was some sort of alternate reality thing. We…persuaded him to find a way to track you down and bring you back."

"Except now he's with Shredder," Casey sighed. "They could be back home already."

"Maybe," April allowed. "But Stockman said the device was only a prototype and that latching onto the bio-signature of you guys was hard as it was. Finding a way back could be tougher."

"You guys didn't think to have him build another?" Donatello asked.

"It was a rush job," April defended herself. "At least we insisted he go through the thing first just in case. We're not total idiots."

Jessica stared at her. "You came through a portal from another universe designed by a talking fly. The jury is still out."

"I should announce that we have a guest," Splinter said. There was a shuffling as an attractive blonde-haired woman exited from the side room. "Jess, you're back!" Trish Walker smiled. She was dressed in a light blouse and slacks, her hair a bit tousled but still looking good. "Sorry, I was tracking your phone down to here and…" Trish blinked as she took in the new arrivals and leaned in toward Jessica. "Jess…You know those are four giant turtles, right?'

"I'd say you get used to it but I'd be lying."

Trish shook her head. "Wow. I was already freaking out about the rat but this…"

April chuckled. "I've been where you are. A simple story had me running into the guys here and things have gotten even crazier since."

"And you?" Trish asked Casey.

"Just a guy helping out," he shrugged.

"And doing an awesome job of it!" Raphael said.

Danny looked to Luke. "I'm the former Iron Fist, you have bulletproof skin and the hockey player is the one he thinks is cool?"

"His hair is better than yours."

"No, it's not."

"Keep telling yourself that."

Trish looked at the group. "Okay, the…talking turtles…are one thing but…the Punisher?"

"It's not by choice," Castle grunted. "Against those freaks, you need the help."

"Which is the only reason I'm not busting your ass," Misty snapped.

"Try it," he growled.

"Dude, come on, ease up!" Michaelangelo slapped a hand to the Punisher's shoulder. He looked at it, then at him with a gaze that made Michelangelo slowly back up with his hands raised.

Jessica was looking toward the makeshift computer center. "Right now, I want a line on this…Squirrel chick."

"Oh, the Squirrel Girl?" Trish spoke up. "I've heard of her, been getting calls of her helping people around town!"

"Great, another weirdo in a costume running around," Jessica muttered.

"Yeah, about that, you guys are making half of this up, right?" April asked. "I mean…a World War II supersoldier, a millionaire wearing a suit of armor, a Thunder God and the rest? That's way too much."

Danny looked at her in disbelief. "You're friends with a bunch of talking turtles and a rat!"

"And you're with a guy with bulletproof skin and she's got glowing swords!"

"I'm just saying…"

Trish smiled at Jessica. "And you claim me fighting crime would be a bad idea."

"Trish, we've been over this. Power or not, you're not gonna dress in some dumb costume and go patrolling!"

"I have as much training as you do!"

"Which should just prove my point!"

"She does drink less than you do," Danny remarked.

"Stay out this, rich boy!"

"Technically, I'm not that rich and it's not like I actually lived off the money..."

"Still like to flaunt it," Colleen had to point out.

Danny frowned as Donatello offered him some pizza. "Sorry, I diet."

"Really? Huh, thought the glowing bullet chi came from your metabolism," Donatello said.

"You never did explain how you learned to do that," Daredevil stated.

"Again, it's not an easy story," Danny stated. The cool tone to his voice made it clear he wasn't going to get into it at that moment.

Casey was frowning at Danny. "You're a hard one to figure out, man. You seem like an entitled douche but you fight like someone with nothing to lose."

Danny looked him over. "What's your training?"

"Training? Aside from an asshole of a dad, some nasty hockey coaches and the drunks at a bar? All self-taught."

"Yes, it shows." Casey just smiled and gave a thumbs-up, accepting what he assumed was a grand compliment.

Michelangelo settled into a chair to chew on some pizza. "Okay, so the Hand may not be as much of an issue now but Shredder is still out there."

"And if Baxter fixes that device, he can get back to our world and leave us stuck." Leonardo added.

"I told you we should have tied him up before bringing him over," Casey told April and she had to shrug in agreement. "I was a little worried getting to the guys first." She looked over to them. "And...listen, don't take this the wrong way.."

"In any universe, that statement has been proven to have a zero percent success rate," Jessica responded.

"But maybe turning to these more...um...famous super-heroes with the high-tech stuff is a better option than the street level guys?"

Raphael raised an eyebrow. "April, I don't care what weird stuff the Avengers have seen...four giant talking turtles and a rat showing up? That may be a tad much."

"Besides," Leonardo added. "Shredder and the Foot are our responsibility."

April chuckled. "Honor before reason, nice to see not much has changed with you guys."

"That includes our style!" Michaelangelo announced.

"Finding Shredder is key," Leonardo stated. "If we can figure out where he is again, we can stop him and get that device to get back home."

"Except Shredder isn't an idiot," Donatello pointed out. "He'll be more careful."

Trish scratched her head. "Well…if some of the stories I've heard are true…there might be a way but you guys may not like it…"

Empire State University

Doreen Allene Greene whistled as she walked down the paved sidewalks of the quad of the college grounds. Her light brown hair mixed with her brown slacks and vest over a darker shirt. Her pants were clearly bunched at the rear end as the long brown bushy tail flowed behind her which got the odd look now and then but most just ignored her. She was moving beside a corner when she found Jessica and Trish standing before her, the former with her arms crossed. "Oh. Um…hi?"

"Squirrel Girl?" Jessica asked. The sunglasses over her eyes were an indication of the hour of drinking she'd indulged in to get over the events of the previous night.

Doreen blinked but laughed. "Oh, really, me? Wow, I'm flattered, I am but come on, I am not…"

Trish held up her phone to show an image of Doreen in costume and quite obviously the same woman. She blanched and nodded. "Okay, there's a tiny resemblance…"

Jessica just sighed as she removed her sunglasses and rubbed her head. "Lady, it's been a long night, I'm hungover and no time for this bullshit. By the way, Squirrel Girl? You're an adult."

"Well, come on, Squirrel Woman is just silly." Doreen sighed. "How'd you find me? How'd you figure out my secret identity?"

Jessica stared at her as if she'd been asked what gender she was. "You don't wear a mask. You don't disguise your voice. You have the exact same hair. Oh, and also. You. Have. A. Tail!" She waved at it as Doreen looked behind her as if surprised she'd noticed it.

Trish coughed. "Listen, we don't want to cause trouble but we do need some help. We're trying to figure out a major threat and your Facebook page…"

"Where, again, you make zero effort to disguise your appearance," Jessica inserted.

Trish continued. "Where you say you have methods of finding people and folks mentioning you've helped recover stolen items or even a missing person. We hope you can help us here."

Doreen cocked her head to think about. "Tricky….but okay." She led them to a nearby tree and let out a series of odd chirps. There was a pause and then a squirrel hopped down from a branch into her waiting hands. Doreen nodded and turned to Jessica. "Okay. Just tell Tippytoe what you need and he'll start looking."

Jessica just stared at the squirrel and then to Trish. "Oh, I am not doing this."

"Try it, Jess."

"I am not talking to a squirrel! I am not acting like it's actually that smart!"

Trish arched an eyebrow. "Jess, I spent half of last night with a pack of ninja turtles and their talking rat mentor. You had a one-night stand with a guy from another universe who flies in a time machine. This is where you're drawing the line?"

"It has to be somewhere!"

Trish sighed. "Fine, fine." She leaned in toward the squirrel. "Okay…Tippytoe? Can you find out where this Shredder guy is?"

The squirrel looked at her, scrunching his nose. He turned to chirp at Doreen. "Sure, take all the help you need!" the woman replied. The squirrel let out another squeak before bounding up and crawling back into the tree. Doreen smiled at the two women. "Don't worry, he'll get with his network and be back with the info in no time. So, does this mean I'm part of your team? That would be so cool, do you guys have those identi-card things the Avengers do?"

Jessica rubbed at her temples. "This is why I drink." For once, Trish had a hard time arguing with her. "And we're not a team."

"Yes, you are! I saw it on the news after the New York invasion! They're calling you the Defenders!"

Jessica whirled on Trish. "Please tell me they're not."

"I told you that already!"

"I thought you were joking. I was drinking at the time, remember?"

"You drink all the time, Jess, that doesn't narrow it down."

"Hey, you wanna hear my secret origin?" Doreen asked.

"No language in the universes has enough variations of no to equal my response."

"See, I thought I was a mutant but it turns out it's something else…"

"I don't care."

"I was ten years old when I realized what I could do and as I grew, my powers also gained steam as I have the proportionate strength, speed, and agility of a squirrel…."

"I will pay you to be quiet."

"Thought about joining a team but not sure but this will be so cool!"

Trish shook her head. "You really wanted to chastise me for going crime-fighting?"

Jessica threw up her hands and started to walk off. "Okay, I guess I'll call you when I get info!" Doreen called after her. She grinned as she clapped her hands. "Squirrel Girl joins the Defenders, this is so going to up my brand!" She literally skipped away as Jessica stared after her. "The next time Mick offers me a date, I'm accepting, I don't care what happens."

Luke entered the sewer headquarters, now clad in a simpler pair of slacks and jacket like his old outfit. A nice shower and night in his bed had helped and he was ready to aid once more in tangling with the Foot. Except for Misty (at the station helping to clean up from the previous night's mess), most of the group had gathered once more. Coleen was talking to April while Casy and Relph were sparring. He saw the Punisher sitting in a corner, going over some of his weapons. "You slept here?"

"I've slept in worse places," Castle answered. "You used to get that. Sure you don't now with the fancy new digs of yours.

Luke glared at him. "You got a problem, Castle?"

"Just figuring you out," Castle intoned. "Why the ex-con who talked of being a hero for Harlem is now running a gang operation."

"I don't, someone else will," Luke fired back. "I'm better than whoever could take over."

"Which is why I haven't tried to kill you yet," the Punisher said in a harder voice. "Don't make me change my mind."

"You think your popguns will do anything?"

"I'm not the only one who knows where to find better tech, Cage. If I wanted to, I could take you out."

"Dude, come on, threats right now?" Leonardo shook his head. "We're all on the same side."

"No, we're not," Castle snapped. "You're not soldiers, you're a bunch of freaks playing games."

Raphael was glaring over at him from his spot sparring with Casey. "Watch with the freaks talk, pal! We don't like that!"

"Call it as I see it," Castle remarked. "I'd cut out by now but even I know more numbers can help in a fight like this."

"What the hell happened to you?" Raphael snapped. "What turned you into this?"

Castle glared at him. "My family was murdered by someone trying to get at me. I saw how life was unfair and the courts can do nothing to stop it. The police are held back and too many folks care about being fair than doing what's right. The system is broken." He inserted a clip into his rifle. "Mine isn't."

"Sounds like a cop-out to me," Leonardo stated. "We know how it is to be pushed far, pal. We've seen people broken down too, they didn't turn into killers." He nodded toward Casey.

"I'm a soldier. There's a difference."

"Or is that just the excuse you use to feel better?" He moved toward Cage. "Maybe I haven't walked in your shoes..."

"Or any shoes, really," Michaelangelo inserted from his place on the couch.

"But I know that giving yourself over to anger and hate is not the way to live."

"Works for me."

"You claim you're doing this for justice but you're just adding to the cycle."

"My sons are correct," Splinter stated. He was soothing as ever as he watched Raphael and Casey spar. "While I am not a fan of Mr. Castle's methods, I can understand his anger." He looked to Castle. "But you should be careful that such hate does not overwhelm your soul."

Castle glared at him. "Buddy…I lost that a long time ago."

"I used to think the same," Luke intoned. "I was wrong."

Castle scoffed. "What are you now, a priest?"

"Not in my lifetime. Just having some insight."

Castle shook his head. "Don't go acting like you're a hero now, Cage."

"We never claimed to be heroes," Raphael stated. "But hey, sometimes, it just happens."

"And dude, you came in there and kicked some ass on the Foot!" Michealengo stated. "That seems heroic to me!" He paused. "Then again, you were using guns and Master Splinter says that's the coward's way. But you did go in on your own and that's pretty brave." He frowned. "And Cage seems a good guy but is running a gang operation...And Rand has some secret...And Jones drinks a lot and insulting and that's not heroic even though they all fight crime..." He rubbed his chin. "I may need to make some charts..."

Danny was looking to April as she was hanging by Donatello, both looking over the computer screen. "Wow, these hero things really are for real," April stated. "It's just weird, so much different in this world but a lot the same."

"For the record, we looked for you and Casey here," Donatello said. "But no hits so guess no counterparts here."

"I'm still figuring your world out," Colleen stated. "A hockey player turns into a crimefighter and a reporter joining with?"

"I guess weird stuff abounds in any universe,' April admitted. "Then again, this Iron Man guy is something else."

"It is dumb," Raphael stated. "Him and that Captain America and Spider-Man guy going around wearing masks..."

"Ralph, you guys wear masks."

"That's different! We're living up to a tradition!"

"What a person wears is never what matters, my son," Splinter announced. "It is always what is within the heart and the strength of their spirit."

Colleen raised an eyebrow. "I can imagine you and Stick would have had some fascinating discussions."

"I still want to check this Stark place out," Donatello announced. "Seriously, the tech this guy uses is just mind-blowing! I'm looking at the suits and is this love? I think this might be what love feels like..."

"Oh, God, he's gonna try making us armor, isn't he?" Raphael groaned and Leonardo had to make a nod of agreement. "He's gonna make us armored suits which will be the stupidest things ever and I wouldn't be caught dead in one!"

Danny chuckled as he looked to Splinter. "Too bad Matt had to leave on his errand, I still think he has more in common with you guys than he'd admit."

"What?" Michaelangelo scoffed. "Some guy who got his powers from radiation, trained by a weird old master and fights an ancient ninja order in a costume? We're nothing alike!" He chewed on his pizza before seeing everyone staring at him. "What?"

In the time since discovering his friend's special abilities, Foggy Nelson had seen Matt Murdock in a new light. He'd never realized how someone with such heightened senses had to cope with a city as chaotic as New York. Matt had explained it took years of training to not go wild over bad smells or sounds yet Foggy couldn't imagine how someone with super-hearing could even sleep at night. Not to mention being able to walk past any of the countless garbage bins dotting the city. But it did seem to serve him well as they made their way toward the offices of the New York Bulletin.

Foggy had to chuckle at Matt adjusting his tie. "You're nervous."

"I'm not."

"For a lawyer who crusades in a costume, you're a lousy liar, Matt."

Matt rolled his eyes behind his dark glasses as they entered the main building and passed through security. "You didn't have to come."

"I'm being a good friend, sue me."

"I'll avoid the easy joke there."

The elevator hummed as Matt tapped his cane on the ground. "Fine, I'm a little nervous. We left a lot up in the air before the….thing…so I wanted to clear things up."

"It'll be okay. She's a smart gal, she'll accept this."

Matt shrugged as the elevator opened. He cocked his head as he exited. "Huh. Not hearing heartbeats, guess it's a lunch hour."

Foggy opened the door to the main office of the newspaper…and froze in his tracks, his briefcase falling from his hand as his face dissolved into horror. The smell of blood hit Matt hard and he winced as he took a step back. "Dammit…what is happening?"

"Oh…God…" Foggy moaned a hand to his mouth.

"What? What is it?"

"Matt…for once in your life…be glad you can't see." Foggy knew he'd be carrying the images in his mind for months on end.

One figure was draped over a chair with a pair of knives sticking out his eyes. A woman was slumped over her desk with what appeared to be a spoon sticking out of the back of her scalp. A teenage intern had his face smashed into a nearby copying machine, which actually made some copies of his final agonizing moments. A heavyset woman was slumped in her chair with the cord of her computer wrapped around her throat. Others were strewn about with items sticking out of their heads and chests that ranged from knives to pens to what looked like a playing card in one's throat.

Despite his shock, Matt's ears picked up at a heartbeat he found familiar. "Karen," he whispered, rushing to a nearby office. He kicked in the door to enter. "Karen!" Foggy was behind her, seeing Karen Page cowering under a desk, blood on her face and clothing but seemingly unharmed.

"Matt?" she whispered, her eyes wide as she shook in her place. "Matt, get out…he's still here."

"Who?" Before she could answer, Matt sensed something coming at him. He spun around, raising his cane in time to deflect the pair of knives being thrown after him. Standing before him was a figure clad in a black and white costume with what looked like a target on his forehead. "Not bad, Red," he grunted.

Matt frowned as he recognized the voice. "Poindexter?! Is that you?"

"It's Bullseye," the man replied. "I've had a whole lotta time to think about how you got me here, Red. I figured going after her would be a good way to draw you out."

Matt was shrugging off his coat and pulling off his tie, freeing himself as much as possible. "Killing these people wasn't needed."

"Nah. That was just to fill out the time." He gave an easy-going shrug. "I get bored."

Matt could instantly tell whatever psychosis had hit Dex was worse than ever before. "Don't do this, Dex."

"Bullseye!" the man snarled as he pulled out another knife. He was racing in as Matt moved to catch his attack. "Foggy, get Karen and go!"

Foggy knew better than to argue with Matt. He was by no means a coward but it was obvious when he was a liability. Grabbing Karen, he moved toward the exit. Bullseye punched at Matt and then moved to throw a knife at Foggy. Matt tackled him, causing the throw to go off and barely graze Foggy. He hissed in pain but continued to push Karen toward the exit.

Bullseye glared at Matt. "You. Made me. Miss!" He punched Matt hard. He rolled with the blow to lash out a kick that smashed into Bullseye's mouth. The man grunted with a hand to his jaw. He flicked something out and Matt barely managed to hold up his cane to catch the items. He realized that Bullseye had just thrown his own tooth at Matt's eyes. Which meant not only was he a truly sick person but his aim was more uncanny than ever.

Karen was heaving for breath as Foggy pushed her to the elevator. He was already dialing a number on his phone and held it up. "Misty? It's Foggy. Matt gave me the number for an emergency, get down to the Daily Bulletin now!"

Bullseye smashed Matt against the nearest wall and blasted him again with a blow. Matt gasped as he felt the punch, which was far stronger than a normal human should be. "Hurts, huh?" Bullseye gloated. "Ya wouldn't believe the sorts of things you can rebuild a spine with nowadays."

Matt snarled as Bullseye once more smashed him with a punch that he had to take. They fought around the office, trading punches and kicks. Matt was doing his best but Bullseye's strength, combined with his sheer insanity, was affecting him. "Ya know, once I figured out who you really were, I figured you were faking the blind thing," Bullseye hissed. "Fisk does. It's the perfect disguise, who's gonna think a sightless shyster is a vigilante? But nope, I get it now. You're really blind, just some nifty super-senses to make up for it." He reached to his belt. "Which means this oughta really hurt."

He pressed down on the device and a high-pitched siren echoed throughout the room. Matt yelled as he fell to his knees, clutching his ears in absolute agony. Bullseye grinned, his own special earplugs protecting him from the sound. He unsheathed a dagger, spinning it in his hand as he moved over the fallen and shaking Matt. "I'm sure this can be seen as cheating, Red….But hey, we all gotta go sometime."

He raised it up just as a star-shaped object flew through the air to knock the blade out of his hand. Another star cut through the belt, silencing the sonic scrambler. Bullseye looked to the nearby window where a vision in dark red knelt, the sash at her waist flowing behind her. The wind billowed her lush black hair after her, her flawless exotic features on display with the eyes narrowed right at the costumed killer.

Matt's hearing had cleared yet he was sure he was somehow mistaking the distinctive heartbeat he knew so well. "Elektra?" he whispered.

The beautiful woman let out a small smile as she spun a sai in her hands. "Matthew. You just can't keep out of trouble…"

Bullseye grinned as he held up his knife. "Now this…just got interesting." He moved to attack and Elektra leapt to charge at him and Daredevil rolled on the ground to get out of the way of the two deadly killers

Shredder was starting to well and truly hate this version of New York.

It wasn't like the city he knew was sweetness and light but this version with all its super-heroes and incessant media attention was really aggravating him. At least there were still places for him and his people to hide but he was getting tired of finding one abandoned building after enough to cower in rather than ruling as he should. This former base of some organization called SHIELD was doing well for now but Shredder vowed he wasn't going to be moving again.

"Are you finished?" he demanded, his arms crossed as he watched Stockman fiddle with the device before him. It linked his transponder to the communications equipment left behind, the screens showing nothing but static. Bebop and Rocksteady were nearby while the remaining Foot were trying to regroup following the mess of the previous evening.

"Given I've never worked with this technology before, the fact I'm this far ahead should say something!" Stockman snapped with that annoying buzz of his.

"Stockman, you know I loathe the cliches of threats involving terms such as 'swatting' and 'squashing' but if you don't prove your worth in the next minute..."

Stockman adjusted the cables in the transponder before activating it. "Aha...I think I have it!" The screens shimmered with power before a face slowly appeared in it. It took in the figures before him and let out a grunt. "I was wondering when you'd eventually call. Although I'd half hoped it would be never."

"You were hardly my first option either," Shredder returned.

"I don't know how long the connection will last," Stockman warned. "So maybe you two can stop the usual reminding yourselves how much you despise each other and just get down to business?"

Shredder nodded. "Very well. The offer is simple. This world can be open for an invasion by you in exchange for getting us back to ours. We can finally end this annoying rivalry/partnership we have and each be on our way. Are you open to it?"

There was a long pause before the figure moved forward so his face filled the screen. The face was set in what looked like a brain with eyes and a pair of tiny tentacles shaking about. "Keep talking, Shredder," Krang stated. "Just keep talking..."

For Squirrel Girl, I know there's Milana Vayntrub and Anna Kendrick a favorite. But I think Eden Sher (The Middle) would be perfect in the role.

And yes, there are plans for the Hand still even with Gorgon taken out (because that's what Squirrel Girl does, takes out big bads fast). Plus, the Elektra vs Bullseye fight and obviously Krang entering the fray so hopefully not as long before the next update.