Dave sighed as he again looked over the evidence the team had up on the board again. The team had been in New Mexico for two days now and hadn't made substantive progress in finding their UNSUB, the missing newborn of their latest victim or the growing list of babies previously abandoned to see if they were linking to their UNSUB. The lack of progress in any of these areas had everyone's frustration levels rising.

As far as he could see it Strauss was a significant factor in why the team was struggling right now with what was already going to be a difficult case. On the flight to NM they all had overheard the phone call Hotch had received from Strauss insisting that Morgan was to lead the team on this case.

With Dave having been with the team for several months now the team had learned to function well in their respective roles. The change in team dynamics at the last minute had complicated what was already going to be a challenging case. It was a difficult case regardless however the change in leadership had all of them off kilter, including Hotch and Morgan.

Hotch was doing what he could to support Morgan's efforts and support the team while becoming as frustrated as the rest of them at the slow progress of their investigation.

Morgan was having the team follow leads but was taking the slow progress personally including staying at the station to keep working after the team returned to the hotel last night. Dave had called him out on it when he arrived that morning to find Morgan still there. The last thing the team needed right now was their leader on this case to be so exhausted that he couldn't lead properly. Ever since Dave had been needing to keep his anger at bay about it so it wasn't misinterpreted as mistrust in Morgan's abilities to lead. That wasn't it at all as Morgan had been just as surprised by the order when Hotch announced it.

No Dave's anger was focused on his mistrust of Strauss. That had been a sizable part of his decision to return to the BAU after Gideon had shown up at his cabin, stating he was walking away from the FBI. Dave had heard the rumors about what Strauss had tried to do to Hotch and what her goals had been when assigning Emily to the BAU.

And as much as Morgan and Hotch didn't always see eye to eye Dave didn't see Morgan spying on the team for Strauss. Which now has him wondering what Erin Strauss was up to with the team?

Dave shook his head to refocus himself back to the board. He would get back to Strauss' motives later. Right now they needed a lead. There was growing discontent among the locals with the slow speed of the investigation and changing theories. No one had approached them as far as he knew but it was only a matter of time. Given the reactions of the locals nearby during the last conversation the team had had with Garcia in the middle of the station, it may be soon.

Perhaps it was time to stop putting Garcia on speaker or at least only do so when they were in their workroom with the door shut. It hadn't taken a profiler to see the shock from the locals who had been close enough to overheard the conversation. He had seen several heads turn when Garcia had been talking about her and Morgan's 'genetically perfect offspring'. Since then Dave had been questioning if they were actually currently trying for a baby and if so was during a case the best time to let everyone know that?

At the end of the call Dave had then planned to pull Morgan aside to express his concerns about the appropriateness of this type of discourse. A subject he was well versed in given his past reputation within the Bureau. While the team knew they were dating, these flirty interactions were only going to get Derek in trouble with HR if they continued to occur when he was leading the team.

And it appeared that he wasn't the only one taken aback by it. While it hadn't been surprising to see Reid's confused reaction it had been to see JJ's shocked one as Garcia had rambled on about what people were willing to pay for babies with certain characteristics. Though as he looked at the pictures on the board in front of him, he could see why this case would be difficult for the younger female agent. Their victims all looked similar to her while only being a few years younger than JJ. Garcia's rundown about the demographics probably reinforces those similarities.

But as he thought about it it hadn't just been JJ who had acted strangely. As the phone call had proceeded he had seen Emily's body tense. He also hadn't missed the look of regret that passed over Hotch's face.

He shook his head as he noticed others from the team head back towards him. They needed a lead so they could solve this case and then go home.

####

As the team separated at the hotel into their respective rooms after calling it a day at the station and having dinner, JJ found herself unsettled about this case. Like the rest of the team she found cases involving kids to be the most troubling. This case had the double whammy of kidnapped and murdered teens as well as missing infants.

But it wasn't just this case that had her unsettled though working it had brought her worries to the forefront of her mind. There had been a concern that she had had for a few days now. One that had grown with each passing day to the point that she didn't think it was prudent to ignore it anymore.

Her plan had been to discuss this concern with her doctor when she had her followup for the head injury she received on their last case after being hit with a shovel. But as things frequently go in the BAU, they left for this case before her doctor's appointment and she had needed to reschedule it.

Deciding she was done waiting JJ grabbed her wallet and went towards the door. While she knew Hotch didn't like them going off on their own while on cases this errand she needed to do it on her own. She wasn't going to risk being pressured by the others to let someone else get what she needed or to have one of the guys go with her. She wasn't ready for anyone else to have an inkling about what she suspected quite yet. No, there was a pharmacy just down the road. Even walking she would be back in less than 20 minutes. She needed to know tonight if what she had been suspecting was actually true.

####

Given the mounting evidence to sift through, the team quickly found that they were putting a lot of miles on the SUVs to do interviews and check out sites first only in New Mexico. But then as they were following leads the case had them also traveling to Arizona as well.

There was a lull in conversation about the case as Emily and Hotch were traveling between sites. After they sat in silence for a while Hotch said, "I'm sorry."

Emily looked over at him confused as she asked, "what are you sorry about? Did something happen that I don't know about?"

Hotch smiled briefly before answering, "I hurt you." He paused and then continued at her continued confused expression, "after Garcia was shot. That day I came into the conference room. I know the question I asked hurt you although that wasn't my intent." He hadn't been able to get the memory of that day out of his head since Garcia had updated the team the previous day.

Emily sighed, having mostly compartmentalized that discussion from months earlier, "I know you weren't trying to hurt me. It really was just thinking about the cannibalism and that I almost ate what he made that made me sick."

Hotch nodded, "I can understand that. I got some of the stew but didn't get a chance to eat any of it. I should have spoken to you before that day about how you were feeling and not in the office."

Emily sighed, "it's fine Aaron. It's in the past. We don't need to talk about it."

"Yes we do Emily. I need to explain because what you think was the issue isn't the case." Hotch explained.

Emily shook her head and gave a small laugh, "OK Mr Profiler, what did I think the issue was?"

Hotch nodded relieved that so far this conversation was going well. He knew he had hurt her. Again. He had been trying to find the right time to bring up the subject and hoped she would hear him out.

"You thought that I was angry with the thought of you being pregnant." Hotch started.

"Yes." Emily quietly answered.

Hotch sighed before continuing with the conversation he had been planning in his head since shortly after that day, "I wasn't angry then and I'm not now. Well, except at myself. I shouldn't have brought it up in a setting where we couldn't openly talk as so much of the context of what I was feeling wasn't verbalized and that hurt you. Hurt what we are trying to build together.

Emily while I was tense and upset it was more about the circumstances and timing because my personal life was so complicated at that point. I had just finalized my divorce. I was still struggling with getting over Haley. Her walking out on me and taking Jack. Her affair. How she had been attempting to keep me away from Jack. And I was still trying to figure out how visitation with Jack was going to work.

I needed time to work though the end of my marriage and come to terms with what happened before I could move forward in a healthy way. You deserve better than to be a rebound. I've done the rebound thing in the past and it has never worked out. If you had been pregnant then I was worried that I wasn't in the right mindset to be the partner I would want to be or the parent I would want to be for our child. I didn't want to fail you again.

The two of us weren't together and on some level I don't want you to feel pressured at all to be in a relationship because of a pregnancy. I want the reason we decide to be together to be because we love each other and want it. If we were to decide that we want to have a child, I would want us to be together so we could raise the child together."

"You still want a baby with me?" Emily asked, surprised.

Hotch relaxed in his seat and blurted out, "yes Emily of course. Now that we know the truth I want to discuss all of the plans that we made back then to still see if it will work for us. If we still have the same dreams.

Moving to New Haven together probably won't work between our jobs and I'm sure Haley won't agree to it with my visitation with Jack. I really don't want to give up any of my time with him. But the other goals we had we can see if they are still relevant. And we can make new goals. Ones that feel right to us now."

Emily nodded, "you're right. You need to be where you can get the most out of your visitation time with Jack."

Hotch reached over and took her hand before he answered, "we need to be. I still want everything with you. Marriage, kids. Do you still want that with me?"

Emily squeezes his hand as she answers, "yes I do. I know I've been overly cautious…"

Hotch shakes his head as he interrupts, "...we both need to be. There is nothing wrong with being cautious. I'd rather we take our time and are sure than to have regrets later."

"We are risking a lot with our jobs. Will you regret being with me if it causes you to lose your position?"

"Yes we would be risks with the job but you are worth the risk. If we are at a place where we want to make a go of it, I'll transfer with plans to retire when I reach the 20 year mark."

"Aaron, I can't ask you to do that. The others will hate me if I'm the reason you leave the BAU. The work we do is what you want to do. Chasing bad guys is who you are."

"Emily, they could never hate you. And you aren't asking. I'm sharing my plans with you. You are only part of the reason albeit a significant one. I've been thinking about it for a while.

I was ready to leave the BAU when I was suspended for Haley. But since the divorce with only having visitation with Jack, I've started considering a change more seriously. I want more time with Jack. I can't even go to court with that request unless my job situation changes. I also want us to have time together that doesn't involve traveling all over the country and chasing serial killers.

This is why I'm not pushing back on Strauss about training Morgan on management responsibilities. I want to make sure he is ready and the BAU will be in good hands when that day comes, whether it is sooner or later."

Emily seeing that he was serious asked, "what would you do then? Given that you are a borderline workaholic I don't see you being content to stay home all the time."

Hotch sighed as he stated, "I left the prosecutor's office and ultimately came to the BAU to make a difference at an earlier point in the process. The BAU isn't the only way to do just that. There are many paths to the same place."

Emily laughed before adding, "OK, now you sound like a fortune cookie."

Hotch laughed back, remembering the other case in New Mexico wondering if being back was part of what had him having this conversation now with Emily, "that is the same thing I told the person who first said that to me. It was on a case before you came to the team here in New Mexico. I was dismissive of what he was saying at the time but he was right.

It was around the time that Sean told me he didn't want to go to law school and wanted to become a chef and was moving to NYC. I pressured him about law school. We fought about it but ultimately I apologized and wished him well.

Having seen how well he is doing now. How happy he is. Happier than I've seen him in years, I realized that law was never where his passion was. What he is doing now is making him happy.

Yes I find our work interesting and am glad we are doing it. To get justice for victims. To get bad guys off the streets but I now realize that it is not the only path to reach the goals I have for my professional life."

Emily sat quietly for a few minutes before quipping, "are you sure you aren't working towards a philosophy degree with Reid?" She paused before adding, "I'm not nearly as close to retirement as you though."

"Then you determine your own path and I will support you however I can." Hotch said as he squeezed her hand.

####

Emily went down into the basement with Dave where they found the teens who were being held. The room was what they had suspected back at the station- a modern day dungeon. The spiral staircase they had just come down was the only way in or out. But seeing the environment gave them a greater understanding of the terror these young women had experienced during their captivity though the full weight of what happened to them wouldn't be known until interviews were done.

After Morgan arrived shortly after them with the baby, Emily took a step back while fully taking in the setup. As she did Emily felt as if the walls of the basement were closing in around her. Her senses were becoming overwhelmed by the smell of blood that was thick in the room from the recent childbirth. The fear and tension that hung in this room as cigarette smoke clung to fabric. As she looked around the enclosed environment she noticed the drains on the floor surrounded by tile that looked very similar to another dungeon-like basement she had been in. The terror. The blood. Reminiscent of a very dark place for her.

Emily tightly shut her eyes and took a few deep breaths. No. She couldn't go back to that place right now. She couldn't fall apart. The team needed her. She took a few more deep breaths and worked to center herself into the moment. She needed to get out of here. Back outside.

As she opened her eyes, she saw the EMTs making their way over toward Carol and the newborn to assess them before transferring both to the hospital. Rossi and Morgan were focused on the new mother and baby. From her earpiece, she learned that JJ was staying with the young boy they had found upstairs. Hotch and Reid were with the two UNSUBs along with the locals.

It was then that her eyes landed on the terrified teen standing alone on the other side of the room. This is who needed her help right now. This is where she needed to be. Slowly walking closer so as to not spook the young woman, Emily stopped a few feet from teen remembering that these UNSUBs kidnapped runaways and that this young woman seemed to still be in the withdrawal phase of whatever she had been taking. They would need to have the doctors at the hospital take a look at her.

When the teen looked over at her with wide eyes, Emily started, "hi, I'm Emily. What is your name?

"Julie," the teen responded, clearly frightened.

"Are you hurt?" Emily asked.

Julie shook her head as she answered, somewhat jittery, "No."

Emily nodded before answering, "OK good. We are still going to take you to the hospital and have the doctors check you out. Are you ready to get out of here?"

Julie shook her head before answering rapidly, "but I can't leave her. Carol. I can't go."

Emily took one step closer and answered reassuringly, "my colleagues and the EMTs are helping her and the baby right now. They are going to the hospital as well."

Julie watched the EMTs and without turning back to Emily stated, "I was so scared. She was in labor. They wouldn't help us or get any help. I needed to help with the baby. I didn't know what I was doing."

Emily nodded, "you may have been scared however you were very brave as well. You and Carol both were."

Julie nodded and after going over to Carol started up the stairs with Emily. At the top, an officer handed Emily a blanket which Julie allowed to be wrapped around her as they headed out of the house. As they walked towards the ambulances Julie asked, "what happens next?"

####

Emily sat back in her seat as the jet carried the team back towards Quantico. As she looked around, everyone else was sleeping after the rough case. As tired as she was, she didn't dare fall asleep right now knowing after what happened in the basement, nightmares were likely. Nightmares that would wake everyone up and lead to questions she couldn't answer.

She had already put in a request for an appointment with Alicia. While she did have a reaction to that basement, it had been encouraging that she had been able to pull herself out of it quickly and recenter herself enough to continue with her work. She just hoped that her therapist felt the same.

She also was taken aback by how much the little boy they found in that house reminded her of Declan. Same age as when she had first met him. Same white blonde curls and blue eyes. She was happy to hear that there were biological grandparents who wanted to raise him.

But as she sat here she couldn't help but wonder how Declan was doing. The last report she had gotten was that he was adjusting well. While reassuring it didn't stop her from wondering if she had made the right decision about what she did to protect him. And part of her wondered if seeing him just before going down into the basement had had a part on the intensity of her reaction in the basement.

Her gaze stopped when she reached Aaron. He looked so relaxed as he slept that she likened to Aaron instead of the team's Unit Chief Hotch. She thought back to their talk in the SUV where once again it had been Aaron to whom she had been talking.

She was grateful that she had heard him out about the awkward interaction they had had months earlier. And as he had explained she completely understood where he had been coming. She hadn't realized until a couple of days ago how much that earlier conversation had hurt her. How much it had had a role in her hesitation since then to consider fully committing to being with him again. Now that they had aired that out she needed to consider if she was ready to take those last couple of steps to be with the man she had wanted for the last 14 years.