Chapter 14: A Setback and a Step Forward
Hermione Apparated to Snape's house as she did every Monday morning, but a quick inspection of the rooms revealed he was gone. She hoped he had slept well the night before because he had obviously gone to his mother's bedside again. She looked for a note from him, but there was nothing to be found, not even a list of potions for the day. Hermione spent nearly an hour arranging and rearranging the jars of ingredients on the shelves around the laboratory as she waited for him.
The minutes seemed to last for hours, making her anticipate his return all that much the more. After what had transpired between them the previous night, she was unsure how to act around him. Would it be best to treat him as she always had and hold him at a distance, or would he allow her to be more informal and friendly? Hermione desperately wanted to speak to him as a close friend, but she was unsure what his reaction would be.
The room was so quiet she could hear the ticking of the clock. Hopping off the stool she was perched on, she Disapparated to the alley beside the hospital. Luckily no one was within sight, relieving her of the need for damage control. She retraced their path from the previous night, and stepped onto the third floor expecting to find busy nurses and perhaps a food cart rolling around with breakfast. Instead, she was confronted with two very angry men a few yards down the hallway.
"If you touch her or try to pour those vile poisons down her throat I will –"
"What? What? Kill her? That's what you're doing right now!" Snape's back was to her and his arms were stiff, fists clenched at his sides. "I healed her! I can do it again!"
Hermione strained to see over her former Professor's shoulder. An older man with a face just as harsh was standing there, fury exuding from his very pores. "Take your delusions and your wickedness elsewhere, Severus. You aren't wanted here."
"She's going to die!"
"If that is her fate, then so be it. I will not have you interfere with this evil you try to masquerade as magic. I am saving her soul!"
"You're killing her and I –" Snape broke off as the older man glanced past him, noticing Hermione. Looking over his shoulder, Snape saw her as well. His eyes cooled from fury to weariness. "Miss Granger, please leave," he said, nodding at the elevator behind her.
"Is she one of them too, Severus? Have you no decency? You brought them into this hospital, and you expect me to stand for it?" The older man took two steps around Snape and advanced on her.
Snape turned and grabbed his arm roughly. "If you touch her I'll –"
"You'll what? Kill me? Work your devilish wizardry on your own father?"
With a sound of complete disgust, Snape released the man's arm and took several long strides to where Hermione stood. He snatched her arm and pulled her back into the elevator. "Professor?" she said after the doors closed.
Snape slumped against the wall and slid down to the floor. He shook his head at her, refusing to give any further details about what had happened. His face was pale and his eyes were bloodshot and dull; he looked as bad as he had before his mother had been revived. "Tell me what's wrong," Hermione said softly, kneeling before him and pushing his hair out of his face. When he didn't respond, she stroked his face with a trembling hand. "Severus, please."
Her use of his given name startled him enough to evoke a response. "You shouldn't have come. I'm sorry."
"Sorry for what? Tell me what has happened."
He shook his head again and turned his face away from her gentle fingertips. The elevator was moving, and Hermione knew it was only a matter of seconds before the doors opened and someone else joined them. She did the only thing she could think of – she leant forward and wrapped her arms around him tightly, Disapparating them both before the metal doors parted.
They reappeared in the floor of her living room. Crookshanks let out a startled meow and stalked out of the room. The morning sun filtered through the sheer curtains and cast a sick, yellow glow on Snape's pallid skin. His face was contorted in helplessness and pain, his eyes empty of life. "Please, tell me what happened. Please." Hermione waited with bated breath as his thin lips parted.
"I can't go through this again," he whispered in a rough, heartbroken voice.
"Go through what? What has happened?"
He shook his head and turned away from her. "Cancer. They've discovered an inoperable tumor in her brain. The doctors say that even though she is out of the coma, they doubt she will live for more than a few months."
"The man arguing with you was your father?" Hermione asked, moving to kneel in front of him.
Snape nodded, his hair falling forward to curtain his face. "I don't want her to die, but he's forbidden me to do anything, and the legal rights are his." He paused and sighed deeply. "I'm not even sure I could do anything to help her now, and even if I could, she won't come with me. She says she must stay with my father."
Hermione didn't know what to say. He had only gotten his mother back hours before, and now she was being taken away from him again. After witnessing his sleepless nights and the aftermath of his guilt over hurting her, she could only imagine what kind of havoc this new development was causing in his mind. "I'm sorry, Professor," she said softly, watching his downcast eyes.
He shook his head and waved her apology away with a hand. "There is no need for you to apologize."
Shifting closer to him, she placed one of her hands on top of his. "I wish I could help. Is there anything I can do?"
"No," he replied, closing his eyes. His lashes cast dainty shadows across the skin below his eyes, and Hermione couldn't stop herself from raising her hand to touch his face. To her surprise, Snape covered her hand with his and pressed his cheek more firmly into her palm. Her breath hitched when he turned his head to slide his warm lips over the heel of her hand. Small puffs of his breath tickled her palm and wrist.
His acceptance of her touch made her bold. She settled on the floor beside Snape, wrapping her arms around him and pulling his head down to rest on her chest. He put up little resistance and nuzzled his head against her breasts. Hermione held him there with her fingers twined in his hair, gently massaging his scalp.
"You smell very good." His voice was startlingly close, but she tried to calm her nerves and make him comfortable. "No one has been this close to me in a very long time," he said.
Hermione smiled and bent to kiss the crown of his head. She opened her mouth to speak, but his movements made the words die on her lips. He positioned his mouth at her shoulder and slowly worked his way up to the sensitive spot where it curved up into her neck. His hot breath on her skin nearly threw her into a panic. In the last week she had entertained this fantasy once or twice, but the real thing was quite different. Fantasies were just that: fantasies; they would never happen and there were never any true repercussions for indulging in them. His lips brushing over her pulse point drove home the fact that this was a very real situation.
Snape pressed hesitant kisses on her neck, his nose nuzzling the tender flesh there. As much as his actions scared Hermione, they also excited her. The fantasies she had indulged in about him were coming true, and she was unsure if she should stop him or if she should urge him on further. Her body was obviously on board for the latter course of action because her fingers were pressed against the back of his head, pulling him closer, and her chest was rising and falling swiftly and irregularly.
His warm breath fell on her ear just before the tip of his tongue traced her lobe. "I'm sorry, Hermione… so sorry," he whispered in a breathless voice.
"Why?" she managed to choke out.
He placed small kisses along her jaw line before he answered. "I shouldn't take advantage of you like this."
Before she could respond, he covered her lips with his own and kissed her. The move startled her momentarily, but she regained herself and returned the simple kiss. When his lips moved down to her neck again, she was able to speak. "You're not taking advantage of me, Professor."
"Severus," he reminded her between kisses on her throat.
"Severus," Hermione repeated. "I feel as if I'm taking advantage of you after all you've been through in the last few hours." She found it extremely difficult to talk with his mouth on her neck, but she got her point across in a trembling voice. He was only here on the floor of her flat because he was so distraught over his mother. The Severus Snape she knew wouldn't have kissed her or even touched her in such a way. His emotions were running high, and he was looking for comfort in any way he could find it.
He lifted his head and let his lips hover over hers. "I assure you, you are not taking advantage of me, Hermione." Sliding one of his hands over her waist, he moved the other to cup her right breast.
She couldn't take the teasing any longer and closed the small distance between their lips, kissing him. Though she initiated the kiss, he deepened it by parting his lips and tentatively pressing his tongue between them. She moaned and opened her mouth for him. The small sound of approval from Hermione seemed to add fuel to his fire. Snape moved a hand from her waist to the back of her neck. She felt his tongue trace the contours of her mouth, running along her teeth before it tangled with her own tongue.
The kiss was slow and leisurely, though an underlying urgency laced his movements. His hands roamed restlessly over her, she lost track of where they had been and what he had touched. All she knew was that he had thoroughly mapped her curves with his fingertips by the time they both pulled away for a breath. She watched him in wonder. Snape's face was flushed with healthy color, and his lips were glistening and slightly parted to allow strong breaths of air to be pushed out. His chest rose and fell rapidly as he watched her.
For a fleeting moment, Hermione considered stopping the encounter at the kiss, but she knew if she did he would never give her this chance again, nor would she ever see this side of him again. He would lock away any feelings or attraction he might have for her and, most likely, treat her like a student again. It was the last thing she wanted. She actually wanted him to continue to look at her the way he was at that moment, his eyes gleaming in the morning sun coming in through the window.
Hermione ran her hands up his chest and over his shoulders. She twirled strands of his hair around her fingers. "Shall we go to my bedroom?" she asked in a small, hesitant voice.
"Please," he replied, his eyes never leaving her face.
She extracted herself from his arms, still wrapped firmly around her, and stood on shaky legs. Snape took her extended hand and stood as well. She expected a moment of awkwardness as they walked across the flat to her bedroom, but Snape had other things in mind. His arms went around her waist again, and he stepped into her body as he dipped his head down to kiss her again.
Hermione threw her arms around his neck and allowed him to back her into the bedroom. She fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, but her shaking hands, divided attention, and lack of sight made it extremely difficult. Once they were standing in the middle of her bedroom floor, he took pity on her, placing gentle hands over hers and undoing the buttons himself. She was much more suited to the less delicate task of jerking the shirt out of his pants so he could shrug out of it. His bare chest was warm and mostly smooth beneath her fingertips.
"You wore your robes into the hospital," he whispered, trailing his fingers over the sleeves. Hermione had not even thought of the odd looks from the Muggles when she burst into the hospital in her blue robes. "I've been wondering what you always wear under these robes when you work with me."
"You've thought about that?" Hermione asked, looking up to meet his gaze.
Snape's fingers quickly unfastened the robes and pushed them off her shoulders. "Lately, yes." He took in her t-shirt and jeans. "I should have guessed you would be wearing these silly Muggle clothes."
"You… don't like them?" Her voice was soft and unsure.
He smiled and slipped both his hands beneath her shirt. She felt his slightly cool fingers moving up her sides. "Oh no, I like them very much. They're quite easy to dispose of." With that said, he pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it on the floor. When his eyes returned to look at her bra, Hermione wanted to cross her arms over her chest. Before she could make the self-conscious gesture, he was on her again, his arms wrapped around her tightly. He guided her over to the bed, and he followed her down onto the mattress when she had no choice but to fall back on it. Suddenly his body was pressed full length against hers, and she was unsure where to put her hands. She settled for grasping his shoulders when he began kissing her exposed neck and chest again.
She vaguely felt a tugging sensation around her navel, but his body was blocking her view. All she could see was a mass of black hair over her breasts. It wasn't until the cool air of the bedroom hit her hips that she realized what he had done. Her jeans and panties were at her knees, and Snape continued to guide them down her calves until he encountered her shoes. Within seconds, he had pulled both the shoes and the clothes from her body. He kneeled before her on the bed and unfastened his slacks. Try as she might, Hermione couldn't look away as the pants fell to his knees. Their kissing and touching had obviously had an effect on him, if his straining erection was any indication. Though she had never been extremely forward in bed, Hermione wriggled her body and spread her legs wider in a silent invitation.
Snape rid himself of his slacks and settled between her thighs, his hands wriggling their way beneath her to unhook the bra. It was soon thrown on the floor with her other pieces of clothing. She was completely naked in bed with Professor Snape. Hermione mentally shook her head. Severus. I am naked in bed with Severus Snape, and I desperately want him to make love to me. He answered her wish with a kiss and a swift thrust into her depths. The sudden sensation of being filled tore a sharp gasp from her throat and curled her toes into the sheets.
As he began to move within her, he trailed his kisses down to her neck and latched his lips onto the most sensitive spot there, alternately sucking and laving it with his tongue. It was too much for her. She never thought they would be moving together, pressing their hips frantically into each other like this. His teeth grazed ever so slightly against her neck. Each of his strokes pierced through her and coiled the tension in her even tighter. "Don't stop," she said through labored breaths.
He heard her plea and increased his rhythm, pushing even deeper into her until she thought her head might hit the wooden headboard behind her. Hermione couldn't stand it any longer. Her release was so close, but she couldn't seem to catch it. Snaking a hand down her abdomen, she brushed two fingers over the slick nub protruding from her folds. He slammed into her just as she climaxed, her contracting walls ripping a low groan from him. A moment later his body tensed, and he buried his face in her neck. She felt him tremble before the eventual warmth as he released himself within her. Hermione ran her hands over his back, soothing his exhausted body and attempting to show his wounded mind some sense of support and affection.
"Thank you, Hermione," Snape whispered in her ear.
"You should get some sleep, Professor."
"Severus," he said, correcting her again. "Please call me Severus." She watched as he slowly closed his eyes and his breathing evened out. Hermione wasn't feeling all that tired after what she had just done with Snape, so she lay beside him in bed, watching him fall sleep. The lines eventually disappeared from his face as he settled into rest. She followed him into sleep not long after, even though she didn't think she was all that tired.
Author's Note: Thank you to snarkyroxy for being such an awesome beta!