Chapter Two

If only night can hold you where I can see you, my love,
Then let me never ever wake again
And maybe tonight, we'll fly so far away
We'll be lost before the dawn

Before the Dawn (Evanescence, Origin)

"Why so sad, Ani?"
"I'm not sad, Master."
"Please don't lie to me."
"I don't know."
"Are you lonely?"
"No."
"Then what? Look inside yourself, find the answers."
"I don't want to."
"What?"
"I don't like what I see. I don't want to."
"Jedi are not ruled by fear, my Padawan."
"Master?"
"Yes, Padawan?"

"Master!"

Anakin snapped out of his thoughts, tearing his eyes away from the mediocre meal he'd prepared for himself and Obi-Wan. Focusing his attention at last on the present moment, he raised a mute eyebrow at the little boy across the table, being very careful to convey just how displeased he was that his memory had been interrupted. Obi-Wan seemed to falter under his Master's full gaze. Apparently, he'd forgotten what to say.

"If you've something to say, speak up, Apprentice," Anakin commanded, already half tuned out again.

"I…I was just wondering, if maybe…"

"Maybe what?"

"If maybe tomorrow we can do something a bit more fun than book study."

Blinking calmly, Anakin pursed his lips together, thinking the concept over. Finally, he nodded, taking a bite from his food. Qui-Gon had been a much better cook than he could ever aspire to be…the food was yet another bitter reminder that he would never see his Master again. Perhaps the next day they'd go eat in the mess hall, with everyone else. The only reason they hadn't yet was because Anakin had been unwilling to take anymore staring, just yet. It was this same reason that he hadn't taken Obi-Wan for any practical training. (It really was his preference as well.)

"Tomorrow," he agreed.

Obi-Wan smiled at him and went back to his meal. He had heard and seen a bit of a sparring match between his Master and Master Jinn, but never really what he could do. The boy was, to say the least, curious. In the back of his mind, he also wondered if he would impress his Master. Master Jinn had seen something in him… maybe he could get Anakin to see that as well. Obi-Wan cast a quick glance up at Anakin before looking back down at his food. He did not want to disappoint Anakin.

"Your form's off," Anakin informed the child flatly, the next morning.

They'd gotten up early and headed over to the training rooms first thing, after a rather simple breakfast. The blonde Knight had requested that his apprentice show him what he could do. Having assessed the situation, Anakin's own blue light saber flared to life as he demonstrated mutely how the move should be preformed to be most effective in battle. The enemy wouldn't wait for you to regain your balance, after you jump at them, after all. Obi-Wan watched him closely, and then mimicked the movement.

"Better, Master?" He questioned.

"Better," his Master confirmed, his gaze detached as he watched. "Still room to improve, but better."

Obi-Wan nodded and took a deep breath before repeating the movements over and over again, so he would get them right in the future. Anakin watched him carefully, before finally sighing. He felt his skills paling in comparison to Qui-Gon's, as far as teaching went.

"Stop, stop, stop," he commanded finally, waving impatiently. "Just…stop. Take five…stop!"

Obi-Wan stopped, and turned to face him, panting slightly.

"Master?"

"That's…enough." The older Jedi decided, waving again, this time more distractedly. People would be arriving in the training rooms soon…he wasn't sure he was ready to face anyone yet. Facing Tru and Darra had been hard enough… "That's enough for today."

"Yes, Master. I have class soon…will you be alright?" Obi-Wan questioned, his concern showing in his eyes.

Blinking carefully, Anakin eyed him for a long moment.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

Obi-Wan lowered his eyes.

"Just with recent events, you haven't been who you were before. Of course, you probably never will be the same again… Is it all right that I be concerned about you, Master?"

Anakin hesitated, his gaze drifting away from his Padawan again. Was it all right? Probably not. He could hear Qui-Gon and Yoda both scolding that the Padawan should not need to worry over the Master, in his mind.

"It's fine," he murmured finally, lying through his teeth. Obi-Wan smiled and bowed to him.

"I will see you after class, Master," he said and jogged away so he wouldn't be late.

Anakin watched after him for a brief moment, then left before too many more students or Knights could join him in the room. Once alone in his quarters – Qui-Gon's quarters – the young man sunk down to the floor of his bedroom. Surrounded by the few possessions his master had owned, unable to throw them away, Ani could still smell Qui-Gon. Shivers went down his spine… He could practically hear his wry connections, could almost see his gentle smile…could almost feel his remarkably, and unexpectedly, soft touch… Closing his eyes carefully, Anakin worked to preserve those feelings. He wasn't ready to give Qui-Gon up just yet.