Chapter Four
I'm going back in time and it's a sweet dream
It was a quiet night, and I would be all right
If I could go on sleeping
But every morning, I wake up and worry
What's going to happen today?
You see it your way
I see it mine
But we both see it slipping away
You know we always had each other, baby
I guess it wasn't enough
Here in my heart, I give you the best of my love
Best of Your Love (The Eagles)
The next morning, Obi-Wan was awake and drinking some juice when Anakin came out of his bedroom. It did not take both of them long to discover that they were not morning people, this worked out fine. Who wanted a happy chatty person around in the morning when all you wanted to do was still be warm and asleep in your bed? About thirty minutes and several glasses of liquid caffeine later, Anakin turned to his Padawan with a deep sigh, stretching appreciatively.
"Ready?"
Obi-Wan nodded and washed out his cup, then got his backpack, training saber and stood by the door. Anakin joined him shortly, two light sabers secured to his own side. Only one was visible, though. (Qui-Gon's green weapon, now his by inheritance, felt warm, tacked to his stomach and ribs by his belt, under his tunic.)
Anakin's time estimate had been correct, when he'd decided this was early enough. The training rooms were very nearly deserted. They managed to find a nice, private one that was completely empty. Ani was rather pleased.
"What shall we do, Master?" Obi-Wan asked.
Anakin considered for a moment. Qui-Gon had always let him do what he really wanted to first, so…
"What do you want to do first?"
"I only know the basic things. I'm the Padawan, you're supposed to tell me."
"Very well." The blonde tried not to twitch. "Light saber Form I." He drew out his own glowing blue blade, and demonstrated before turning to his protégé. "Begin."
Obi-Wan copied his movements the best he could, remembering what Anakin had told him the day before.
"Again," Anakin ordered, arms crossed over his chest, when he finished. He had the boy repeat the movements several more times, before he sensed someone nearing the room's doors.
"Enough," he barked at that point. Obi-Wan put his training light saber away and came over to him.
"Will we do this every morning, Master?" He asked.
"I'd say so." Anakin nodded, running his fingers through his hair absently. "You won't learn without practice."
Obi-Wan nodded. "I'll see you after class, Master," he said and bowed.
"Try not to set the kitchen on fire tonight," Anakin advised him distractedly, eager to hurry back to his solitude. Obi-Wan laughed lightly, in response, and nodded, walking away.
When Anakin returned to his room, he all but lunged onto the bed. Burying his face into the pillow, he breathed in the faint scent of his Master. He hoped Qui-Gon would heed his call this time…
"How is he doing?" The Jedi Master asked.
Snorting wryly, Anakin rolled over to face him; and gave the specter the same answer he'd given Tru.
"He is."
"You cannot get by me with that answer, Ani. I want to know, and in more than two words," Qui-Gon told him.
"Well enough," Anakin finished dryly. There. That made four words. Slowly grinning, he elaborated, "He's much better in his theory lessons that I was, but it's too early to tell about his practical skills."
Qui-Gon nodded thoughtfully, listening to his words with interest.
"Good. This will be a good test for you, Padawan. It will keep you on your toes."
"Still testing me, Master?" The teasing was blatant in the Knight's tone, as he gazed fondly at the older man. "Even the grave cannot stop you from that?"
"It seems not." The phantom Master smiled. "But, would you want it any other way?" He questioned.
"No." Tears stung at the blonde's eyes, he felt so happy to be with Qui-Gon again… "It's part of what makes you wonderful, Master."
"You are too good to me, Ani." Qui-Gon waved him off.
"Not so." Anakin felt a pain in his chest. He wanted so dearly to kiss his beloved right then, but it was quite impossible at the same time. Still, Qui-Gon cupped his cheek as best as he could, sending him warm waves through the Force.
Obi-Wan was just finishing his classes for the day, and was walking out of the training accommodation with his friend Bant, when Bruck Chun came up and pushed him roughly into the wall.
"Hey!" Bant exclaimed. "That's not nice, Bruck!" The bigger boy just laughed and pushed Obi-Wan again.
"Why would I care if it's nice? It's just Oafy-Wan," Bruck told her snottily.
"Bruck, stop it," Obi-Wan told him when he was finally allowed to stand straight without being pushed.
"What are you going to do, Oafy-Wan?" Bruck challenged. Obi-Wan just stood there, staring back at him; he was not one to cause a fight after all. "Stop staring at me, Oafy." With that, Bruck punched him right in the nose.
Anakin groaned, exasperated, when he felt distress flood through his training bond with Obi-Wan. Taking an apologetic leave from Qui-Gon Anakin left the apartment to go rescue his Padawan.
Anakin Skywalker was a rather imposing figure in the Jedi Temple. He had been the favorite of Qui-Gon Jinn, the great Jedi Master, and there were rumors that he was the Chosen One of the prophecy. His Force sensitivity and skills in piloting and swordsmanship were uncanny. He was not a person that the Padawan's messed with lightly, so it was a bit disturbing when an irate Anakin Skywalker came looming up behind Bruck Chun, that afternoon.
"Padawan Chun," the Knight barked irritably. "Kindly quit manhandling my Padawan."
Bruck nodded to Anakin, and sent Obi-Wan a glare that promised 'I'll finish this later.' Bant was already at Obi-Wan's side, looking at his nose.
"He's such a creep. Are you sure you're okay, Obi?" She questioned.
"Yes, Bant…I'm fine," he murmured, although his voice sounded very weird since he had a hand over his nose. "Thank you, Master. I'm sorry you had to come down here for this."
"It's my job." Anakin brushed it off dispassionately. "Tomorrow, you're learning how to punch." Then, it appeared, was the final word on that. Qui-Gon would have probably reprimanded him on this level too, Anakin noted chewing idly on the inside of his lower lip.
"We should get you to the healers, to make sure your nose isn't broken, Obi." Bant told him.
"I told you, I'm fine; really, just a little blood. It's not like it hasn't happened before, it'll probably happen against too," Obi-Wan replied.
"You're learning to punch really hard," Anakin revised the plan with a sigh, kneeling down by his little apprentice's height and letting one hand hover briefly in front of his nose. He reached through the Force to examine it probably.
"I'm fine, Master," Obi-Wan protested.
"Obi won't use what you teach him, here in the Temple, Master Skywalker," Bant told him. "He's too kind hearted. Master Yoda says he shows great promise in negotiations, though."
"Bant…" Obi-Wan murmured, protested.
"He will," Anakin corrected her, eyeing him oddly. "Or, I'll beat Padawan Chun up myself."
"That would be a sight! I would pay to see that!" Bant laughed.
Snorting dryly, Anakin helped right his apprentice, before straightening himself.
"We're working on your Force telepathy, too," he informed him student.
"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan said. "How will we do that?"
"Practice." He shrugged.
"Alright, Master. Bye, Bant," he said as they walked off. Anakin was silent, on the journey back to their quarters. Once inside, he debated shortly on whether to address the matter further or not.
"He's done that to you before?" He wondered, finally.
"Yes, Master, I've lost count of how many times, not really punching me in the nose but picking on me," Obi-Wan answered
Frowning, Anakin licked his lips carefully. "We'll fix it," he promised.
"Alright, Master. Should I finish my homework first?" He asked.
"Yes." Anakin nodded. He'd go fraternize with Qui-Gon while he did that. "You…you come get me, when you're finished," he instructed.
It didn't really take long for Obi-Wan to finish his homework, and he quietly approached the door with the intent of knocking. But, he heard muffled sobs, and stopped. Poking his head in, he saw Anakin sitting against the wall, his knees pulled up to chest, his arms folded over his knees as he cried into them.
Obi-Wan, hesitated by the door, and then came into the room, and knelt down by him, wrapping his arms around Anakin's shaking shoulders.
The Knight tensed under his touch. He tensed severely. There was one person who had held Anakin, ever, and that had been Qui-Gon. Even Darra had never hugged him. He'd made a point of keeping most people from touching him. When this boy did it…he no longer knew what to think.
Obi-Wan felt him tense, but did not pull away, if anything he held on tighter. It was several more, agonizingly long, minutes before Anakin calmed enough to speak.
"What are you doing, boy?"
"Just being here, Master. I do not know what to say…but I can listen. Bant says I'm very good at that," Obi-Wan answered quietly.
"There's nothing to say…" The blonde choked again. Qui-Gon was dead. That was all there was to it.
"Doesn't really have to be words, Master. Feelings speak just as loudly. I didn't know Master Jinn very well, but I have heard he was a great man."
"He was…fantastic…" Anakin confirmed, trying not to sniff. "The stories…really can't compare at all…"
"Will you tell me about him, Master?" The boy requested. "So that I can know the truth?"
Anakin watched him briefly, before nodding. Wiping the tears away with his sleeve, he began to recount some of Qui-Gon's more spectacular moments to the child. He conveniently forgot to include the full extent of his relationship with the late Master.
"He does sound truly amazing…" Obi-Wan said when he'd finished. "Almost too good to be true, Master."
"And, now he's gone." Anakin snorted humorlessly. "I have no idea what to do now…"
"I cannot tell you, Master, it's not my place," Obi-Wan replied.
Anakin eyed the boy critically, his lips twitching up, despite himself.
"Of course," he murmured finally. "If I'd asked, it would have been foolish to…"
"But, I am here to listen." Young Kenobi's eyes spoke honest volumes.
"Right… Thank you, Padawan." The Knight allowed himself to smile a bit more. Obi-Wan smiled in return and gave him another brief squeeze, before standing.
"Since we both vowed not to touch the stove, should we go down to the mess hall?" He wondered. "It should be pretty empty, by now."
Once again, the boy's words drew hesitation from his Master. But, in the end, Anakin determined that he would have to go around the other Jedi eventually, and nodded in agreement. They could not, after all, live on fruit forever.
"What was it like to train under Master Jinn, Master?" The boy's words startled Anakin out of whatever reverie he'd been in, and here merely blinked for a moment.
"Wonderful," the young man murmured reminiscently, after a moment, rising to his feet with a soft sigh. "Absolutely…wonderful."
"I was actually talking about his teaching methods, Master," Obi-Wan chuckled softly.
"Oh," Anakin coughed awkwardly. "That was a great honor as well."
Obi-Wan nodded, seeming to accept that answer, and they walked down to the mess hall to eat.
Upon arriving, however, all Anakin could find he was capable of was grimacing. It wasn't nearly as empty as he'd hoped. There were still several Masters there, and a good many Knights. (None of which he'd seen since Qui-Gon's death.) He felt his stomach crawl with the cramped space.
"Master? Are you alright?" Obi-Wan questioned, worry evident in his tone.
"Fine," the blonde murmured, nudging the little brunette toward the line gently, with his boot. He could feel the burning sensation of Yoda watching him owlishly, from a nearby table. Escape seemed a good plan.
Obi-Wan got his food and then sat at a table, which was practically deserted in a corner, sensing Anakin didn't particularly want to sit with anyone else. Immensely grateful for this fact, Anakin threw himself down into a chair, next to his student, poking absently at the food on his plate.
"You know, it won't get into your stomach that way, Master," Obi-Wan commented idly.
Anakin glanced up at him, and smiled halfheartedly.
"I've been finding I'm not very hungry, lately," he admitted with a small snort.
"Then eat a little, please?"
The blonde's smile took on a wryer air, and he purposefully shoved a bite into his mouth, chewing slowly for emphasis.
"Thank you," Obi-Wan mumbled.
Shaking his head, in something suspiciously close to amusement, Anakin merely shrugged, and continued to eat the food, wanting to finish before it got cold. Footsteps were drawing nearer, and Obi-Wan looked up to greet Master Mace Windu with a smile.
"Master Windu," he said, bowing his head.
"Greetings, Padawan Kenobi."
Anakin winced a little, upon hearing his apprentice address the Korun Master. Mace…Oh boy, oh boy…the blonde glanced sheepishly up at his Master's friend, waving slightly.
"Hello, Master Windu…" He mumbled his own greeting. He'd never been too comfortable around the imposing Mace Windu. Not intimidated in the least, just uncomfortable.
"Greetings, Anakin, how are you fairing with your new Padawan?"
Recalling that one of the larger warnings about taking Obi-Wan on as his Learner had come from Mace himself, Anakin felt a small surge of defiance, and cocked his head congenially at the dark skinned man.
"Oh, we're doing fine, Master."
"Really? Is that true, Padawan?" Mace questioned, looking back at Obi-Wan.
"Yes, Master Windu. Master Skywalker is helping me perfect my light saber technique, and soon we'll be working on telepathy," Obi-Wan answered emphatically.
"But, tomorrow, we're working on punching," Anakin corrected mildly, taking a sip of his mujaberry juice, to make it appear to be a smaller deal than it actually was. (Jedi were not generally accustomed to having their training interrupted for lessons in slugging.)
It was probably mostly due to that aforementioned fact that Mace turned curious eyes on him, before he blinked, and the look disappeared.
"Do you feel that is important enough to push aside his other studies?" He questioned.
"Yes." Anakin took another calm sip from his glass. "I won't have my Padawan unable to defend himself. There will be times when he won't be able to use his light saber, and he needs to know hot to not break his thumb."
Mace looked like he wanted to argue further, but he didn't get the chance. Yoda hobbled up beside him, effectively ending his conversation with Skywalker.
"Heard of your past times out side of class, I have, young Kenobi," he stated. Obi-Wan blushed and lowered his eyes, in shame.
"I did not see any sense in the matter, Master Yoda, so I did not try to fight back," The child told him, and Yoda nodded slowly.
"A strong mind you have, on your way to becoming a great negotiator you are." Yoda turned his head to look up at Mace, missing the smile that came to Obi-Wan's face. But, he did not need to see, to know it was there. "Other things, we have to do, Master Windu." The other Master nodded, and turned away without even a 'good evening', and left. Yoda bid them goodbye, then followed his cohort away.
Anakin watched his apprentice in silence for a moment, waiting for the Masters to leave and his stomach to settle, before speaking again.
"Pity and temperament will get you nowhere in life," he murmured finally. It was always something he and the rest of the order (Qui-Gon included) had disagreed upon. "Letting people get away with screwing you over is not the same thing as mercy. Don't confuse them, and don't be a doormat to your enemies. They will walk all over you."
Obi-Wan studied him for a moment, and then nodded. "I will try harder, Master," he promised.
Anakin nodded, offering the boy a wry look that clearly stated that he saw his job as making sure that Obi-Wan didn't get his ass handed to him when he did so, before glancing down at his food again, and setting his fork on the plate. He felt less hungry than ever, somehow. There was a silence between them, for a few more moments, before Obi-Wan broke it.
"Shall we leave, Master?" He questioned.
"Please." His Master nodded with a tired sigh of relief, rising to his feet and trying not to shift uncomfortably. (An act that really was easier in theory than in practice.)
Obi-Wan threw what was left of their meals away, and then followed him out of the door. He sent a glare at the first person that dared to open their mouth, to whisper something about his Master. Although his physical attacks were not yet up to par, Bant had often told him that his tongue-lashings were things to be feared.
Despite his Padawan's mute defense, it was impossible for Anakin to miss all the stares they received, making their way through the mess hall to the corridor again. Sometimes he wondered just how much the Jedi knew of his relationship with Qui-Gon. Was it possible they knew, or suspected, everything? Was it his status as the Chosen One alone that had saved himself and his Master from expulsion? Or, was it simply that they didn't' know at all, and needed something new to gossip about? He didn't know…he wasn't sure he cared…
Once back in their rooms, Obi-Wan shifted on his feet. He had finished his homework before, and now wasn't sure what Anakin wanted to do.
"Alright," Anakin sighed, running his fingers absently through his hair, as he tried to draw his mind together and focus on what to do next. "Your homework's done… you're free for the night, try not to get into any trouble," he decided finally.
"I will do my best, Master." Obi-Wan gave him a smile, turned around quickly and left.
Once alone once more, Anakin growled to himself and quickly gave his head a good shake. It was an attempt to clear it. IT didn't work. If anything, he was then feeling distracted about why he was feeling distracted. Annoyed and utterly frustrated, the young Knight retreated with the hope of finding…something – anything – to focus on.
Obi-Wan went down to the training rooms. With almost all the Padawan's doing their homework, it was not hard to find an empty one. He removed his outer cloak, folding it neatly, and sat it by the wall, before he pulled out his light saber. He closed his eyes and took a calming breath, letting the Force flow through him. His thumb pressed the activation button and he began to repeat the moves Anakin had been teaching him the day before.
So, at least a lack of focus wasn't a running theme through the two of them. Even after Obi-Wan returned that night, he would be able to hear his restless Master, through the thin wall that separated their rooms. Anakin was puttering about late into the night. It made Obi-Wan yawn and pull his pillow over his head, to block out the noise.
For a while, the noises settled. But, then about an hour before dawn, a loud curse, crash, and surge of the Force – powerful enough to wake most of their floor, more than likely – burst through their rooms. Moments later, another curse followed, and the sound of pounding feet through the common room. Then, there was silence, eerie, total silence.
Obi-Wan jumped up, gripping his light saber, and ran out into the common room. He wondered if they were being attacked. But, there was no one. Not an intruder, not Anakin. Obi-Wan was alone in the apartment, and the only things missing were his Master's light saber and boots, upon inspection. Obi-Wan scratched his head in confusion.
"What happened?" He wondered, going back into his room to get dressed. Once ready, he concentrated on Anakin's Force signature, in hopes of finding him to ask what was going on.
He located the older man in the hangar, his energy buzzing with agitated turbulence. It was like an overpowered droid, bouncing off the walls. It wasn't too unusual for Anakin in particular, but still a sign for some concern. Obi-Wan stopped a few feet behind him, watching his back cautiously.
"Master?" He asked finally.
One hand twitched briefly, as the blonde jumped a little, before turning back to look at the child. Obi-Wan could see Anakin physically pulling himself together before his eyes.
"What?" The Knight blurted out, grimacing and rephrasing. "What are you doing up? It's…early."
"It is, Master." He nodded. "You…um…left in quite a hurry, and made quite a bit of noise doing so. The Force around you is not exactly calm, either," he explained slowly. Anakin seemed to struggle with his answer, for a few minutes.
"I'm fine," he lied finally. "I just…can't focus. On anything." Growling in frustration, he tugged on the short, fair strands of his hair. "Damn it! I can't focus without him!"
Obi-Wan looked thoughtful for a moment.
"Did Master Jinn give anything to you?" He asked, hoping to be helpful. "Something that…well, you consider special and you can use to focus yourself through?"
"A rock," the Knight supplied instantly, his tone slightly bitter and muffled by the heel of his hand. (Which he was currently pressing against his mouth.) "He gave me a rock."
"Use that then," Obi-Wan suggested quickly. "It may have, or have not, been special to him, bit it's special to you. It reminds you of him, of his presence. Use it to focus on the Force, Master."
Anakin offered him a somewhat dry look, before nodding, sighing, and tugging his knees up, to rest his face in them.
"I think my brain's frying," he grumbled finally, mostly to himself. Obi-Wan frowned, and came to sit beside him.
"That's quite possible, Master, if you allow it to happen."
Snorting, Anakin forced his gaze to peek out at the child before him
"You're smarter than I'd have expected, for your age," he complimented finally. Obi-Wan gave him a smile.
"Thank you, Master."
"Yoda's right," the blonde yawned, stretching out on his back, on the dirty floor. He paid a nearby puddle of oil no mind. He was used to such things. "You'll make a good diplomat."
"Is that a good thing, Master?" Obi-Wan questioned.
"I guess so," the Knight shrugged a bit. "I'm not a diplomat at all, so you're one up on me."
"Was Master Jinn a diplomat?"
"His negotiation skills were second only to Yoda, by the end."
Obi-Wan blinked at him, definitely surprised.
"I wish I could have known him more than just by the stories," he admitted with a sigh.
"Knowing Qui-Gon Jinn was like…" Anakin trailed off thoughtfully. Knowing Qui-Gon was like bedding peace. He couldn't say that to his nine-year-old Padawan, though… "Like wrapping yourself up in absolute serenity." He settled for finally. "Being with him…I felt like time stopped… Every moment was absolutely perfect – even the ones that sucked." Then, he'd died, and time had started again.
Obi-Wan stared at a point on the wall, before voicing the question that had formed after Anakin had said that.
"Will…will things ever be like that between us, Master?" He wondered softly.
"Force, I hope not," Anakin laughed, reaching over to ruffle his hair, with a false sense of calm. "I wouldn't want to put you through that!"
Obi-Wan chuckled softly, and smiled at him. "I guess I should be thankful for that, then."
"Anything more would be a lie." Anakin shrugged a little more, rising to his feet and trying to still his hands. "Do you want to get started on training early, or try to get some more sleep?" It was still dark out.
"Training, Master," Obi-Wan answered, standing as well. "I don't think I could go back to sleep, even if I tried."
Anakin nodded and motioned for him to follow. This was good. They'd have plenty of time, at this hour of the morning. Obi-Wan followed him to the training rooms, and then took off his outer cloak. He folded it and laid it against the wall. He walked to the middle of the floor, and waited for Anakin. Alone in the training rooms, Anakin demonstrated the proper way to make a fist, and how to actually swing the punch.
"Keep your elbow lax," he instructed. "Don't snap it taut. It lowers your chances of breaking your wrist, if you do it this way, and raises the effectiveness of the blow."
Obi-Wan copied him, although he was slow to do so. He didn't like fighting and he never had, actually.
"Good," Anakin nodded, crouching down in front of him, and holding one hand out. "Practice," he commanded, nodding down to his palm. Obi-Wan watched him for a moment, unsure. But, at the look in Anakin's eyes, he sighed and threw a punch at Anakin's hand.
"Harder!" The blonde barked, when the punch barely made contact. "You couldn't scare a rabbit like that."
Obi-Wan looked like he wanted to laugh at that, but he pulled his arm back and threw another punch, harder this time.
"Focus, Anakin." Qui-Gon's gentle voice cut through his wandering mind's reverie. The little boy looked up at him with pouty eyes, and poutier lips.
"It's hard!" He complained, looking imploring. "C'mon, Master. I don't like sitting still. Do we have to meditate every day?"
"When you learn to control your mind, we can do it less often." Qui-Gon looked amused. "Until then, relax, and just focus on the—"
Anakin blinked, when his apprentice's fist made contact with his hand. Pulling back to himself, he glanced down and realized his palm stung.
"Better," he murmured after a moment. "Do it again."
Obi-Wan repeated the action over and over, until Anakin told him to stop. Shaking his now throbbing hand to loosen up the muscles, Anakin nodded shortly at the boy.
"Good," he mumbled. "Get out your light saber, and go through those drills again, now."
"Yes, Master." Obi-Wan pulled the saber out, and activated it, to go through the movements that Anakin had been teaching him. Per usual, when Ani felt new energies drawing near, the Knight issued the command to half.
"You did well today," the blonde complimented him gently. "Next time Chun touches you, I want you to hit back. Harder. Understand?"
Obi-Wan nodded. "Yes, Master… Although, I still don't like it."
"It's not fair for him to take advantage of you." Anakin shrugged. "I won't always be able to help you. It's important that you know how to protect yourself."
Obi-Wan nodded, as he slipped his robe on.
"I will see you after class, Master?"
"I'll be at home," Anakin confirmed with another nod. He was always at home. Qui-Gon really would smack him, over that, were he able to…
Obi-Wan nodded, although there was a worried look in his eyes, as he walked away from the room.
That afternoon, when he returned, Obi-Wan announced his arrival to Anakin. Though, he technically didn't need to, since Ani could supposedly sense his presence. He received no reply, though. Anakin was quite obviously there, but he appeared to have not noticed the boy's entrance, or proclamation. Obi-Wan drew nearer to his Master's door, and he could hear soft whispering from within.
The Padawan knew it was wrong to eavesdrop. But…he was curious…who was his Master talking to? Quietly, he came to the door, and stopped before he could be seen, listening to the voice within.
"It's hard, you know." Anakin was saying, speaking to apparently no one. Perhaps he had a com-link on… "It's hard to focus. To concentrate. I can't concentrate on anything." He chuckled thinly. "Not even flying or droids."
'Who is he talking to?' Obi-Wan wondered to himself.
"I mean," Anakin continued. "What's the point of training the kid, if I'm going to do a lousy job of it? It was funny…he didn't know how to punch, Qui! It's going to take a lot of work, and I don't think…that I can do it properly, without being able to concentrate."
'Qui? Does he mean Master Jinn?' Obi-Wan thought. He wanted to go in and tell Anakin that he was wrong, and he was a great teacher, but then he would have to explain his eavesdropping. With a soft sigh, he turned away and went to the common room, to work on his homework.
Anakin didn't exit his room again for several hours, and all through that time the murmurs had continued. Apparently, his invisible guest had given the Knight a bit of a pep talk, however, for he seemed to be in the best mood that Obi-Wan had seen him in, since their return from Naboo.
"Good evening, Master," Obi-Wan greeted him, when such a time as he deemed worthy of appearance came.
"Hi." The blonde nodded back at him, eyeing the stove critically, as if trying to decide whether he had enough courage to actually touch it or not. Obi-Wan saw his look, and stood.
"Perhaps we should go out, Master?" He suggested quickly. "The Temple's food is really good, but…it does get a little old, after a while."
"Didi," was the only thing Anakin said as he nodded, and hurried to grab his cloak.
The word didn't make much sense, until they were actually at the slum were Didi Oddo's café was placed. Anakin smiled as he noticed the traces of Qui-Gon's friend and his daughter, Astri. Things such as a touch of fresh paint, here or there, and a crowd consisting of the lowest scumbags in the galaxy mixed with some highly ranked Senators, inside. Upon entering, Anakin saw a round man, making his way through the crowded diner, and smiled. Didi was an information merchant, on the side. It appeared he hadn't changed much, Anakin felt it somewhat relieving. At least something was still stable in his life. Obi-Wan stayed close to his side, watching the less than favorable members of the crowd warily.
"Didi!" Anakin called, his grin widening still more when the man turned, and his face lit up.
Didi Oddo embraced Anakin tightly, drawing a teasing grunt from the younger man. Anakin returned the hug wholeheartedly, though.
"Little Anakin Skywalker!" Didi released Anakin, and motioned for them to follow him. He led them back to a cluttered office, and gestured to chairs for them to sit in. "So happy I am to see your person so well! So much sorrow I did feel, when I heard of Qui-Gon's unfortunate accident with the Naboo Queen! My heart ached for him, Anakin."
Anakin's expression hardened briefly, but he merely nodded and smiled gently at Didi. "As did mine, old friend."
Obi-Wan couldn't help but smile at the human; he certainly had a warm personality, after all.
"You are doing well?" Didi wanted to make sure, looking Anakin over with concern. "I cannot imagine you would be, knowing how much you—"
"Didi." Anakin cut in sharply, though his gaze was apologetic.
"Of course…" Didi returned his look meaningfully. "But, look how thin your person is!" The information trafficker tutted seriously. "Astri will feed you, before you go. You and your young friend, um…" Didi trailed off, looking Obi-Wan over curiously.
"Obi-Wan Kenobi," Anakin supplied simply. "My Padawan," he added, earning a delighted look from Qui-Gon's old friend. "Obi-Wan, this is Didi Oddo. He's a great friend of the Jedi, Qui-Gon in particular." Obi-Wan gave Didi a bright smile, and shook his hand.
"A pleasure to meet you, Sir," he said.
"Sir, sir!" Didi exclaimed. "Listen to this one! Never you did call me sir, Anakin."
"I was far too busy agreeing with Astri on how much I disapproved of your sidelines, Didi." Anakin snorted at him. "How is she, anyway? She's still working here?"
"Oh, yes." Didi nodded. "She's gotten a Senator to take a shine to her, too. Big Divinian, I believe."
"Astri is aspiring to be a politician's wife?" Anakin raised an eyebrow, with a small sniff of personal disapproval. Didi shrugged helplessly, clearly stating that he could no more tell his daughter who she could date than give Chancellor Palpatine a leg wax.
"People actually have that job?" Obi-Wan wondered, looking at Anakin.
"It's not so much a job as a…status." Anakin struggled to explain. Luckily, Didi helped him out, by shooing them back toward the dining room.
"Come, come!" He urged. "Astri has made a wonderful sauce today! So sure am I that your persons will enjoy it!"
Obi-Wan followed Anakin to a booth, and sat on the inside. Plates were soon brought and sat in front of them. After taking a bite, Anakin grinned at Didi and instructed him to give Astri many, many compliments. Didi promised he would, before hurrying off to tend to some drunks in the opposite corner.
"This place is very lively, I can see why people would like it so much." Obi-Wan took a bite of his food, and after swallowing he smiled. "And, the food isn't bad either."
"It used to be," Anakin promised him, taking a bite of his own food. "Before Astri took over. The first thing Qui-Gon told me to do was not eat anything."
"Master Jinn had a very colorful group of friends, didn't he?" Obi-Wan asked.
"Didi's friends with everyone." The blonde shrugged a little. "Even Yoda."
"Wow…" Obi-Wan murmured, and went back to his food.
After they finished the meal, Anakin made nice with Didi and Astri for a few more minutes, before they left the diner again. Anakin's mood was almost unnervingly bright, on the way back to the Temple. Then they actually made it back to their rooms, and he almost instantly darkened again.
Obi-Wan bit his lip, watching his Master's mood darken. Maybe he could do something…something that would take his mind off of whatever was bothering him now. He wracked his brain for something – anything. They had a couple of games here in the apartment…maybe that would do.
"Master, would you like to play a card game, or something?" He asked.
Anakin merely shook his head a little, already heading for his room
"Maybe tomorrow, if you finish your work early," he conditioned quietly, before shutting the door behind himself. Obi-Wan's shoulders fell in disappointment.
"Yes, Master," he whispered. Looking around, he sighed. What to do now? He could always go over his reports again, but that was so boring. Maybe he'd go find Bant, and they could have a practice duel… Yes, that seemed like a good idea. With one last look toward Anakin's door, he left, leaving a note for him.
When he came back, Anakin's door was at least open. Despite this, he still didn't seem to notice when Obi-Wan returned. Once again, he was speaking with someone, only this time Obi-Wan had a clear view that he was the only one in the room. The brief thought that his Master might be mad – as in crazy – crossed his mind, but only for a moment. Surely if Anakin were talking to someone, he had a reason…right? He knocked softly, on the doorframe.
"Master?"
If he didn't know any better, he'd say Anakin hadn't heard him. He certainly didn't seem to. The young man was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. Perhaps, this time, he really did have a com-link, nearby… His next words, however, totally crushed that excuse.
"Didi said he's sorry, Qui," he murmured, stretching slightly, as though someone were touching him in a rather conducive manner. "He's going to miss you."
'Master Jinn?' Obi-Wan thought and he felt out through the Force. It was not entirely unheard of for a deceased person to speak with someone they cared about through the Force, merely unusual. But…there was nobody there. Anakin was speaking with no one.
"Astri too," Ani continued, sitting up and leaning forward, as though he was nuzzling against something…or someone, "and, well…you know how I miss you. I wish you could be here with me all the time…" The blonde balanced himself on one hand and his knees, as he reached the other one up to run it through the air, like one might caress a lover's hair. Obi-Wan watched with fascination, and curiosity, as Anakin looked like he was leaning up to kiss…wait, kiss? Quickly, he backed up a few steps, pressing himself against the wall. His thoughts were racing.
Was Anakin… Had he and Master Jinn…the rumors that he'd heard so much about…were they true?
"I miss you so much, Qui," Anakin repeated, pausing as though he were listening, then he sat back and looked adoringly forward. "I miss you touching me…" He breathed, reaching longingly toward the spot of his attention. "I want to feel you again…I feel like I'm looking at you through glass! I can see you, but I can never really touch you. You're never really mine. I miss the way things were…everything's so…so wrong…"
Obi-Wan turned his head back toward the room. Well…that dispelled any doubts he had… So, that was why Anakin was so affected by Qui-Gon's passing…they had been more than just Master and Apprentice, but lovers as well. Silently, he went into his room and sat on the bed. He wanted to ask Anakin about this, but would that be proper? Did he have the right to do that?
By the time he came back out of his room again, Anakin had fallen silent and retreated into the kitchen, where he now sat at the table and nursed a glass of some ominous blue liquid. Obi-Wan got a glass of water and sat down across from him. There was a very awkward few moments between them, before Obi-Wan cleared his throat. He was dying to question Anakin but how to do it, without being rude? Dull eyes brightened ever so slightly, as they flickered up to him. Anakin made a soft "hmmm?" noise, wandering what he wanted.
"Uh…um…Master…oh, Force, this is weird…" Obi-Wan took a deep breath, and then asked his question very quickly. "Whatwasmasterjinntoyou?"
Already tipsy from his potent drink, Anakin raised an eyebrow in confusion.
"Huh?"
Obi-Wan bit his bottom lip, and then sighed.
"I…uh…I heard you talking today, and I was wondering…what was Master Jinn to you, exactly?" He looked up at Anakin, but then he quickly lowered his gaze again, blushing furiously.
"You…heard…?" Anakin groaned, and let his head fall to the table with a muffled "fuck". After giving himself a moment to pull back together, he sat back up and set about finding a good way to explain this. If he'd heard, there was no point in lying, really… "He was…" He trailed off, unsure of what to say. "Everything." The blonde settled on finally. Friend, lover, father, brother, mentor, teacher, security source… "Everything!"
"Okay," Obi-Wan gave him a smile and stood to rinse his glass, in the sink. He dried it and then put it away. "Thank you for telling me, Master."
Waving his thanks off, Anakin chewed idly on his lower lip for a moment, before issuing his request.
"Obi-Wan…you can't tell anyone, alright?" He murmured finally. "This is my home…I really can't afford to be kicked out, right now."
Obi-Wan blinked at him in surprise.
"I would never tell anyone, Master," Obi-Wan promised him. "It's none of their business what you do in your own time. But, if you really are worried, you could order me to never tell, and then I would have no choice but to follow your order."
"I don't want to order you around." Anakin drained the rest of his glass, and stood abruptly. As he made his way toward the door, he tossed over his shoulder, "Qui-Gon wouldn't have."
Obi-Wan nodded, and followed him out of the kitchen. "I won't, Master. As I said, it's your business and yours alone. Goodnight," he said, going into his room.
Nodding mutely, Anakin went into his own room, and crawled into bed, fully dressed. He could so very nearly feel warm arms wrapping around his shoulder. It drew a soft smile from him. For the first time, in so many months, Anakin Skywalker slept soundly.