Solitary Man – chpt 11

By: sifi

--

"C'mon now Dean… where's that focus? Think about Laura… she's in danger, she needs help…" even his thoughts were slurred. Sam was clinging to consciousness by the barest of threads. He'd found Dean unconscious in his motel room fifteen hours, that felt like days ago, and it seemed to Sam that in that time, half of his world had fallen apart. His brother was unresponsive and locked inside his own head, in some kind of nightmare that barely allowed him a grunt. He could feel the crushing torment rolling off of Dean in waves that seemed to ebb and flow like oceanic tides and try as he might, he'd only been able to reach him once. He'd known when he'd broken through because he'd heard Dean think her name, and he'd felt, as if it were his own, Dean's heart beat just a little faster. He hadn't been able to maintain the connection though, and now he was afraid he wouldn't be able to do it again at all if he didn't keep trying. But he was so damned fatigued, he wondered if he could do any good at all if he couldn't focus himself.

Not only had he been at his brothers side since he lost the wiry man, but now insult had been added to injury. Shep was possessed… I thought he had wards…how the hell did it get through? What if nothing we do…no, that's not possible, if it was… we never would have lasted this long… he looked at Dean, his skin was slackening and his incoming beard just made it look worse. There isn't much more time before I have no choice but to take him to a hospital, he's going to need fluids at the very least… three days without water can kill and he's been sweating like crazy on and off…must be when it gets bad, whatever he's going through… why put him through it? Why not me? I'm the one who's supposed to be psychic… yeah, that's a freakin' joke… Sam hadn't realized it but as he tried to figure out what he could do differently, what tactic he could use to bring his brother back if Laura wasn't available to help, his body had passed out while his mind continued to work.

--

The first thing she felt was the heat and her lungs straining for air that didn't burn. The next thing she felt was pain, pure and simple. There wasn't an area of her body that didn't hurt, from her head where it had impacted any number of stony objects over the last few days, to her feet. She tried to shift her position and felt something pull from the back to the front. Oh yeah… that's right…heh, forgot about that, she tried not to chuckle as she looked down to find the wide end of her silver spike sticking out of her abdomen. Oh yeah… let's not take that out of there…could be the only reason I'm still alive…Dean I'm sorry…oh…I need to tell Sam…she had a vision of her finger moving the highlight down to Dean's number and pressing send, then wondered what she'd said.

Slowly she came to realize that the car was running. Had a half a tank...she looked at the gas gauge, okay, over a quarter…this is good, ish…Dean… I'm sorry, I'd give anything to help you…she thought about trying to become the Raven, shifting her molecular structure but in her present state, without the aid of the contained magiks surrounding Bobby's house to help her focus the energy, she might very well wind up a mound of gelatinous goo. Too bad… it'd be nice to fly again…okay then driving it is…

"Yeah bitch, get us there so we can finish off that human roadblock," an image of the demon, inside the wiry man materialized in the passenger seat and bounced gleefully, "Come on… let's go… let's go leave the baby ripe for the pickin's…"

She closed her eyes and sighed, Oh yeah… forgot about that too…wow… right now it really sucks to be me…sucks to be Dean too… Okay girl, you got one choice and one choice only, you have to get to him…if Sam can't do it you have to try…

"Yeah that's it polly pocket you go get yourself over to your broke ass boyfriend, give me a chance to get back to his head, make sure my handiwork's still working handi…"

"Why do you have to talk like that man? You sound like some Huggy Bear wannabe from the seventies…" the mind of the man the demon had inhabited snapped taking Laura by complete surprise.

"Oh…so very very bad…" she groaned throwing open the driver door in just enough time to turn her head and spew out into the street, adding a fresh smattering of red to the dried rust colored blood she'd hurled before.

"Aahahowch…" she whimpered sitting back, feeling the point of the spike stick into the upholstery of the seat and drag on her innards. Tears slid from her eyes as she reached back with her left hand and grasped the protruding point, trying to collapse it back a bit, not enough to leave her bleeding but enough so that it wouldn't continue to stick in the seat, but to her surprise she was lacking the strength. "Please… please…" she moaned and pressed her palm to the point unsure whether the coupling inside the device would give first or her flesh.

"Ooh self mutilation… baby you know you and me we could have some gooood times…" the demon slice grinned.

"Don't you listen to that sweetheart you just do what you have to so you can save that boy… he needs you…"

"Candy ass… lemme guess you'd just love to have that white boy be your cream filling…" the demon scowled and made gagging motions.

"Shut up… just shut up…" she grunted feeling the point slide into the palm of her hand as finally the coupling inside that kept the joints locked in place gave way and she was able to collapse the first few segments.

"Nice… you kiss your mother with that mouth?" the human sneered at the demon then he turned to Laura, "See what I've had to deal with since this son of a bitch took me over? filthy rotten evil bastard… he got one sick mind too… I wish I could help you miss…"

"T'sokay…" she breathed leaning back with her eyes closed. Her hands were gloved in her own blood as she placed them on the steering wheel while quakes of shock could be felt through the car.

Movement in the rear view mirror caught her attention and coerced her body into squeezing a jet of adrenaline into her bloodstream. There was a pedestrian coming toward her, looking into the car with an expression that resembled concern.

"Better get outta here sweetheart 'er you're gonna wind up in a hospital… if that happens, what's gonna happen to that boy of yours huh… his little brother isn't strong enough to pull him home alone and you know it… you gotta get to him so you can get this bastard dead…" the human encouraged while jerking his thumb at the demon who sat mocking him soundlessly almost like a sibling would do.

Laura stepped on the brake, put the car in gear and pulled slowly away from the curb.

--

Several members of the medical staff at Cook County Hospital recognized Dean when he accompanied the EMT's into the ER. Yesterday, at least he thought it was yesterday but he really wasn't sure, came flooding back and despite the fact that they'd brought Sam to a different room, his imagination was a powerful antithesis, overlaying the image of his brothers dead body, blue and gray and purple splotched with that hideous travesty scrawled into the skin he'd known when it was still pristine.

His mind flashed back to Sam as a child, something about bathing him in tomato sauce, brown sugar and baking soda after the skunking thing… to his credit Sam had indulged in one hellacious smack down before falling to his empathy and crying for Dean. God am I sick of crying already… I have got to find a way stop this… I have to get pro-active on this sonuvabitch before more people die! a flash caught his eye, he could've sworn it was silver and somehow fluid, and it sang. It reminded him of something but he couldn't quite figure out what. He turned his head to try and get a glimpse of it but it was no use. The flash was gone, but he had an idea starting to germinate in his head.

He hoped and prayed as he watched the medical team do what they'd been so well trained to do. They didn't have to defibrillate him… they didn't ask how long he'd been dead… there's hope, as long as I'm looking at those little spikes and they're still working, there's hope…

"He's crashing!" one of the doctors called as Dean's heart lurched in his chest.

No…No he can't crash! That's my dad! He's all that's left! You have to save him! his inner voice howled disbelieving and he wondered why he couldn't have gone to college like Sam, why he didn't know more than the doctors, why he couldn't save the people he loved. Who's next? Please don't let him die, you can't take my dad from me… you already got my brother you bastard! You can't have him!

He looked at the clock as one of them said softly, "Call it…" then he could hear nothing besides the screams of denial and howls of vengeful rage in his own head and heart.

He could feel his head shaking 'no', his heart breaking in his chest and chips of his world falling out of place having lost cohesion with those two words. His knees felt loose and he felt himself backpedal, he felt an arm behind and around him, trying to lead him to a chair, fully aware of his state and what he'd lost less than twenty four hours ago.

Don't touch me! Don't touch me you'll wind up dead… don't make me look at you… don't make me see you as a person… leave me alone…he protested inside his head and turned out of the grip of well meaning person beside him only to find himself running smack into a yellow painted cinderblock wall. He felt his forehead bounce off the block but it didn't matter. He was still rocking his head back and forth in denial as his back came flush to the wall and he slid down with his knees to his chest, surrounded by alien accoutrements, many of which had been used on him at one time or another, not that it made any difference. He couldn't begin to fathom their uses, their purpose, and he couldn't begin to fathom his own any longer without his father and brother. This can't be happening… seriously, it can't be… no power, no God no Intelligent Universe would allow this to happen to one person… Oh yeah? What about Job? a cynical voice from inside asked. He knew biblical myth, he and Sam had grown up well versed in many different belief systems thanks to Pastor Jim and Caleb in particular, They're dead, both of them… that's how Big Bad started before… he sent Meg to kill Jim and Caleb and anyone else who's ever helped us… our friends… they wanted Sammy… why would they let him be killed… unless… an unthinkable possibility came prancing through his imagination wearing leg warmers and black tights, Well there's something you don't see every day… anymore… Thank God… what was I saying? Oh yeah… There's a tie right there… Eddy Jay transcended… he became a demon, but he was dead first… he wanted to become a demon true but… what if they can pervert someone who didn't want to be one? What if they have a way of not just infiltrating or possessing Sammy… what if they decided that route was too risky, that we could get to him and free him…so they decided to kill him and make him… oh man.. oh no… that would explain why they'd kill dad too… am I next? Are they going to find some invisible way to kill me horribly too before I can save either of their souls? No… no f-ing way they win… no matter if it's the last thing I do… they can kill me if they want but so help me God I'm am going to take each and every one of them with me that I can! This I swear! he gave his oath despite his trembling and tearful outer countenance. Once again he saw a flash to his right, that same silvery white light at the periphery of his vision that made him turn his head and look for it. He didn't know if it was real, he had no clue what it could possibly be but he was starting to look for it now.

The first time he'd noticed it was in the pit Eddy Jay's spirit had kept them captive in, he'd gotten angry about something, he wasn't sure but he thought it might have been while Eddy's spirit was whipping Sam, ripping his skin from his bones while breaking them with a chain… at first he'd thought he was hallucinating but he was aware of it now, and whatever it was, this gleam of silvery light that he felt sing when he saw it was slowly becoming a comfort.

--

Laura's eyes opened and tracked the sound that reminded her of a voice. Her head moved left. She saw her reflection and startled, a horrified expression meeting her gaze that literally mirrored the one she felt on her face.

'clack, clack, clack…' rapped on the window. It was a hand with a ring on it.

Without conscious thought or intent her finger pushed the button that would lower the window as a voice to her right suggested happily, "Kill him and I'll give you his life force, believe me bitch you could use it…You're not gonna make it to the boys… and I was always a sucker for a reunion show…hey two words for you… 'Growing Pains' ahhh ahh, yeah see…"

"Miss are you alright?" the state trooper asked removing his mirrored sunglasses, his expression one of true concern as he looked into the car and saw a woman bathed in her own blood with a shaft of metal protruding from her abdomen, "Holy shit…" he breathed.

Laura gasped and met his eyes, "Nothing holy about it...You will log this stop as a warning… you will forget what you've seen… this is completely routine…"

He met her bloodshot eyes and she watched him swallow hard before he nodded, "Okay… you drive safely now…"

She nodded, "Yessir…" she croaked and started to pull out of the runoff ditch she'd apparently wound up in, her gas gauge nearing the emergency zone. She pressed the brake and threw the car into park, "Sir…" she called and choked on the pain that tore through her with the ferocity of Zeus in a snit.

"Yes ma'am?" he asked smiling and returning to her window.

"You carry an extra gallon of gas?" she asked.

He literally tipped his hat, "Two point five ma'am," he nodded smiling happily.

"I'm on emergency officer… I need what you've got…" she pushed and smiled as he nodded congenially.

"Of course ma'am…"

Laura threw open the door and breathed as deeply as possible.

"What the hell do you think you're doing woman? We need to get to cracker boy… oreo filling… whichever you prefer… you need a piece of that boy… let the cop do the deed…" the demon urged from, the passenger seat and Laura actually had the presence of mind to wish she could influence others to see the world she and few others, those like the boys she loved like family knew existed.

Why leave it to someone else to do what you can do? she heard the voice of the woman who'd cared for her body in this life. She was a self-sufficient woman who'd reminded Laura that her greatest strength lay within her heart. It was a philosophy she tried to pass on whenever opportunity arose. She smiled standing at the tank flap, a glint of sunshine reflecting off the fat end of the spike sticking out of her abdomen, Please… Cernnunos, whatever powers that be… help him find that light within himself… help him flick off the corrosion of pain to find that gleaming essence inside… no matter what happens to me, I don't care… if it helps… if it's for him… take me now… take my life, give him whatever's left that I have…He is mine… he doesn't know it, like Sam doesn't know it… but he belongs to me… give him anything and everything… I give it willingly. She thought and heard a voice in her head, "You gave your everything to me…" There was no accusation, just a reminder, and she nodded.

"Aye… I did. When you're done with me Cernunnos, anything that's left… belongs to him… no matter how little it may be… see to it…" she said as the State trooper handed her the gas can, his eyes fixed on the spike hilt sticking out of her belly.

"Uh… you want me to get that?" he asked.

She shook her head, "Never ask someone to do what you're not willing to do yourself," she said softly and smiled, wincing and grimacing and choking on every muscular contraction that made her want to scream and brought her blood to a boil within her.

Her mind clouded red with pain as she poured the gas into her tank and handed the can back to the cop, never in her life had she wanted so desperately to wrap her hands around someone's throat and choke the life out of them.

--

tbc

please.

Sifi.