At the alien gay bar, Kara eyed the news anchorman on the television detailing the trial of Lillian Luthor. "You know, on Krypton we would just send her to the phantom zone where she could easily escape," Kara mused.
"On Mon, we would just execute her after a good ol' round of torture," Mon said.
"Was it really a crime to kill aliens?" Kara asked skeptically.
"No, but it was a crime to kill the king's game without permission," Mon replied.
"That makes sense," Kara approved. "Unfortunately, this world has become soft and squishy."
Kara went over to her table with Hank, James, and Winn. "Another round is on its way," she informed them. "You okay, Hank?"
"Yeah, it's just the first time in this bar without her," Hank said sadly.
"She's in a better place," Kara told him.
"You mean, with her people, right?" Winn asked confused.
"Oh Winn, you're naivety is so adorable," Kara smiled pinching his cheek.
"So, we're finally going to see Alex's mystery man," Winn said ignorantly.
"I didn't know Alex was dating," James said suddenly interested.
"I wouldn't call it dating as much as it is a hug fest," Kara rolled her eyes.
Alex then brought Maggie over to the table. "You all know Maggie Sawyer, right?" Alex asked hopefully. "The MPD detective?"
"Never seen her in my life," James lied.
"Wait...I'm confused," Winn said honestly.
"Aren't we all? I'm questioning it myself," Kara agreed.
"You didn't tell them?" Alex asked disappointed in Kara.
"Oh, I didn't realize I was your publicist," Kara mocked.
"Hank?" Alex gestured.
"It wasn't for me to say," Hank excused.
"I still don't get it," Winn said increasing the awkwardness.
"Drinks up!" Mon said interrupting the discussion as he placed beers on the table except for a vodka martini for Kara.
"Oh, hi, Mon," Alex said awkwardly. "I just wanted you to know that Maggie and I are dating."
"That's great, dating whom?" Mon asked.
"Ourselves," Alex replied obviously.
"Nice, so who's the lucky king of the castle?" Mon asked.
"There isn't one," Alex replied.
"I don't get it," Mon confessed.
"I still don't get it," Winn seconded.
"On Earth, some women are in relationships with other women," Alex explained to Mon.
"Oh, like the L-Word? I thought that was fiction," Mon said confused.
"It still is," Kara told him.
"So, she's dating...who?" Winn wondered.
"Let's talk about something else. You play pool?" Maggie asked Winn.
"Yeah," he lied.
"No, you don't," James corrected.
"No, I don't," Winn admitted lamely.
"It should be an even match then," Kara mocked Maggie.
"Bite me," Maggie said silently back to Kara as Winn joined her.
As the group pulled away to the pool table, James stopped Kara. "That cop doesn't know I'm the Guardian?" he asked concernedly.
"No, and if she ever does find out, I'll take care of it," Kara promised him. The two of them gave each other fist bumps in solidarity.
Kara then suddenly caught a cue ball in her hand that had been shot at them. "Really?" James said unimpressed.
"Sorry," Winn said sheepishly.
The next morning, Kara strolled into L Corp tower to meet up with Lena Luthor after she had just testified at her mother's trial. "Everyone in Metropolis has got an opinion about me," Lena said resentfully.
"That is what Facebook is for," Kara allowed.
"They call me ungrateful daughter, heroine, bitch," Lena shook her head.
"Why not all three?" Kara suggested.
"And they have all called for a quote," Lena shook her head.
"Yeah, including me," Kara added.
"You going to misquote me and make me look like shit again?" Lena asked.
"Yeah," Kara said after a long pause. "It's nothing personal. It's just the job."
"I understand," Lena said sadly. "You know, you're the closest thing to a friend I got."
"That is so sad," Kara wiped away a tear. "Here are some doughnuts to lessen the pain of your mother going to prison for the rest of her life due in all part to you."
"Sure, thank you, Kara," Lena said grabbing the bag.
"So, was it awful?" Kara asked hopefully referring to her testimony.
"It actually felt good. It felt therapeutic," Lena said honestly.
"I know exactly what you mean," Kara said sitting down with her.
"I got to say my piece and distance myself from the Luthor name," Lena said.
"And yet, you still haven't changed your last name," Kara noted.
"My mother's lawyers want me to see her," Lena sighed.
"For what?" Kara wondered.
"Probably to tell me that my dress was horrible and that I need a makeover," Lena said bitterly.
"That's good advice," Kara nodded thoughtfully.
"I don't care anymore. My father is dead, my mother and brother will be in prison the rest of their lives, and now it's just me," Lena said.
"I get it," Kara said sincerely.
"You don't think I'm wrong for not wanting to see that monster?" Lena asked.
"That monster is...a patriot that saw the alien threat for what it was. I've reported on so many violent alien cases that I wonder if we shouldn't just deport them all off the planet. Your mother wants to keep America pure and safe, but she did it in the most dumbass way possible by nearly killing the entire human race. Your mother isn't evil. She's just dumb," Kara told her.
"She's been like that since the day I met her. I kicked her ass in chess at age four," Lena said.
"I used to have an evil batshit crazy aunt. Even though we were enemies, I still enjoyed every minute talking to her, mocking her, insulting her, and being a total bitch to her. It felt good to have a captive audience. I suggest you go talk to your mother and just shit-talk the hell out of her. You'll feel better afterward," Kara advised.
A guard came up to Metallo's weak-ass cell and dropped off a radioactive package that they hadn't bothered to open or screen ahead of time. Metallo opened the package and saw the green glowing rock. Taking it out and installing it into his robot torso, he laughed maniacally.
Soon thereafter, Metallo was in court testifying at the Lillian Luthor trial. "Mr. Corben, will you tell the court how you know Lillian Luthor," the prosecutor asked him while he was on the stand.
"No," Metallo replied argumentatively.
"You will," the judge told him.
"Let me rephrase the question," the prosecutor sighed annoyed. "Tell the court how you know Lillian Luthor."
"She's the doctor that saved my life and gave me a host of badass weaponry," Metallo replied.
"Why did she do this?" the prosecutor asked.
"No idea," Metallo admitted.
"After Lillian Luthor saved you, did she order you to work for Cadmus?" the prosecutor asked.
"Nope," Metallo replied.
"And what did Lillian Luthor tell you about the Medussa project?" the prosecutor asked.
"Nothing," Metallo replied.
Kara ate popcorn next to Alex as the questioning continued. "This is going to be good," Kara promised Alex.
"Permission to treat the witness as hostile," the prosecutor requested of the judge.
"I'll show you hostile!" Metallo said and then broke his cuffs and started blasting the room with his Kryptonite laser on his chest.
"Well...shit," Alex muttered as people were getting zapped.
Kara continued to eat popcorn as Metallo took out the guards, freed Lillian, and waltzed out the door with her. "Kara, do something," Alex demanded.
"I forgot to bring my uniform this time," Kara admitted.
"This is not a joke. People are dead now!" Alex yelled at her.
"Yeah, and whose bright idea was it to put a cyborg in a minimum-security prison, not check his mail, and then present him in a court filled with important people? With or without the Kryptonite, he could have killed everyone here," Kara said.
"Alright, kill him for good this time," Alex pressed.
"I suppose," Kara said after she finished her popcorn.
Kara sped over to her apartment, got dressed, and then sped back to the courthouse. As she got there, the streets were on fire, a giant crane had ripped into a skyscraper, and multiple causalities were on the ground with radiation burns. "Yikes, my bad...my bad," Kara said of the scene.
Kara dropped by the DEO. "Did you fly around the city to go find them?" Alex asked.
"Err...no, because we have satellites that can track radiation," Kara rolled her eyes.
"How did he get so much Kryptonite? That's stuff is supposed to be rare," Alex said frustrated.
"Well, the Luthors have a big stockpile of it courtesy of our boy, Hank," Kara said.
"Kiss my ass," Hank said from across the room.
"We swept his room and visitor log and found nothing. The only visitor to Lillian Luthor was her daughter, Lena," Maggie said suspiciously.
"I am so proud of that girl," Kara said excitedly.
"No, she's not the next Maxwell Lord," Alex told her.
"Damn," Kara said disappointedly.
"Whatever happened to that guy?" Maggie wondered.
"I gave him his greatest wish. He's floating around in outer space somewhere," Kara said.
"That's not the kind of thing you say to a cop," Maggie scolded.
"Please, if you actually sent me to jail I could escape without even using my powers," Kara said obnoxiously.
"Let's stay on topic: Lena Luthor," Alex brought it back.
"Yeah, she didn't do it. I could think of other possibilities like maybe your guards being paid off or something," Kara said skeptically.
Kara arrived at L Corp. tower to talk to Lena about the escape. "You know I was at the jail to see my mother, last night. You're the one that told me to go," Lena said stressed out.
"Yeah, funny how every time I give someone advice it ends up going horribly wrong," Kara said amused. "So, there's this cop that is going to go after you. Her name is Maggie Sawyer...and she's gay," Kara told her.
"What does her being gay have to do with this?" Lena questioned.
"Right, it's all good. Let's all of us be gay," Kara tested.
"My company is actually working on a cure for it," Lena revealed.
"How...interesting," Kara said brightly.
"I didn't do it," Lena said frustrated.
"I know...but my magazine needs to speculate that you did for a couple days, weeks, or months. You understand," Kara said.
"Sure, you're just doing your job," Lena allowed.
Maggie Sawyer and two cops then entered the room. "Oh, hi, Maggie. We were just talking about you," Kara greeted with a fake smile.
"I'm here on official business. Kara, can you step outside," Maggie asked her.
"How about...no?" Kara replied.
"Okay, we found this surveillance footage," Maggie said showing her a video on her Ipad. The video showed Lena grabbing some Kryptonite.
"This is shit," Lena said of the video.
"Yeah, well, you're under arrest," Maggie said and then cuffed Lena.
Kara shook her head sadly as Lena was taken away.
Kara strolled into Catco to find the whole office busy. "So, what's going on?" Kara wondered.
"We're having a crash," James said and then gave Snapper the cover art featuring Lena Luthor.
"Very nice picture," Kara said impressed. "By the way, she didn't do it."
"How do you know that?" Snapper asked impatiently.
"She said she didn't do it. I have it on the record," Kara said smugly.
"Alright, we can add that in the back," Snapper allowed.
"Come on, have you seen the video? It's shit," Kara said.
"Yeah but this will sell more magazines. No one gives a shit if it were some random burglar," Snapper said.
"One of these days, we're going to get sued for libel," Kara warned.
"That's what insurance is for," Snapper said dismissively.
"You going to back me up on this one, James?" Kara asked.
"Is this going to make us a lot of money?" James asked.
"A shit-load," Snapper replied.
"Print it," James ordered.
Metallo easily strolled into the Metropolis jail and defeated two guards before coming up to Lena's cell. "I knew it was only a matter of time before you showed up to free her," Guardian said to Metallo.
"Oh really? How long have you been lurking these halls?" Metallo mocked and then blasted Guardian with a Kryptonite beam.
Guardian blocked the beam with his shield. The two then engaged in a fistfight. Metallo finally got the better of the fight blasting Guardian to the shoulder. "I'm a cyborg. My body is made completely of metal. I can't even feel pain anymore. How did you think you were going to win?" Metallo asked rhetorically.
Metallo then ripped Lena's cell door off its hinges. "Hello, Miss. Luthor. Sorry for the delay," he said to her.
"You do know that by kidnapping me, it makes me look a lot more guilty," Lena said to him.
"That's the whole idea," Metallo smirked.
Alex nursed Jame's shoulder wound at the DEO after the fight. "Metallo's strong but something's off about him," James said.
"Strong for you," Kara scoffed.
"Says the one that didn't fight him," James shot back.
"We need to start treating Lena Luthor like a hostile," Hank said.
"What if you're wrong?" Kara asked.
"No harm, no foul," Hank replied.
"Is that what you say to all the alien prisoners we have locked up?" Kara asked.
"I'm ninety-nine percent confident they're all guilty," Hank said.
"What made you judge, jury, and executioner?" Kara asked obnoxiously.
"This badge," Hank said referring to his DEO badge.
"So, you think she's guilty?" Kara asked.
"I don't give a shit one way or another. Where she is, there is where Metallo and Cadmus will be," Hank said obviously.
"Hey, we do what we always do. Kill them all and let God sort it out," Kara smiled.
"That's my girl," Hank smiled approvingly.
Winn finished his analysis on the video. "Yeah, I cracked the video. It's not Lena. It's Cyborg Hank," Winn said showing Hank, Alex, and Kara the video.
"We need to get to this to the police, the press," Alex said urgently.
"Yeah, about that...," Kara said uncertainly. "We did this cover where we said Lena was totally guilty. So, we need to release this video maybe a little later."
"How much later?" Alex asked impatiently.
"Maybe a month," Kara suggested.
"So, Lena can languish in legal limbo so your magazine doesn't look stupid?" Alex asked.
"It's not just about the magazine, alright. It's also about James. He's under a lot of pressure," Kara said.
"We don't need the police or the press, right now. We have a Kryptonite signature in the hills," Hank pointed out.
"Yeah, it's very unstable like it's about to blow," Winn said as he looked at the readings.
"I'm not touching that nonsense," Kara said putting her hands up.
"Why is Kryptonite such a big deal for you?" Alex wondered.
"Well, my solar energy goes through my body like a circulatory system. I trained my body to put gates on these pathways inside the body, so I am not at maximum all the time like that idiot, Superman. Kryptonite blocks these pathways shutting down the whole system. So, it doesn't matter if I have the same power as the sun if these pathways are blocked," Kara explained.
"It's basically a circuit breaker," Alex realized.
"Yeah, sure," Kara allowed.
"We literally have minutes before Metallo explodes as a dirty bomb showering the whole area in radiation," Winn reminded them.
"No problem. Mon is immune to Kryptonite and is just powerful enough to defeat Metallo," Kara said taking a cell phone from her bra.
After a moment, it went to the answering machine. "Well...shit," Kara realized.
As Lillian was playing with Lex's toys, Kara dropped in through the ceiling. "Supergirl, I can't believe you're here," Lena said relieved.
"Well, that makes two of us," Kara muttered.
"Supergirl, you're just in time," Lillian smiled. "I was wondering if these worked," she said as she threw a grenade at her.
"Holy shit!" Kara said as she grabbed it before it could fall to the ground.
The grenade then activated, producing Taylor Swift on a high frequency. "Oh, fuck me," Kara cried out as she fell to the floor in anguish.
"You're going to pay for what your cousin did to my son," Lillian said to Kara.
"I hate him as much as you do," Kara gasped.
"But he will always be family to you," Lillian sneered. "Lock her in the vault."
Cyborg Superman tossed Lena to the floor and then grabbed a hold of Kara. "Hey, that Kryptonite is about to explode, FYI," Winn said through Kara's radio.
Kara turned around and fired on the grenade ending the Taylor Swift music. "Thank God," she said relieved.
Metallo then fired on Kara blasting her to the floor. "The more Metallo uses the Kryptonite, the more unstable he will become," Winn said to Kara.
"Oh really?" Kara muttered.
Kara got back up and threw a motorcycle at Metallo. He simply blasted it to pieces. "You're doing the exact opposite of what you should be doing," Winn said to her.
A crazed Metallo continued to fire on Kara even as his body was about to explode. A small beam of light suddenly went through his neck. "What the fuck?" he wondered as his head came off and his body went limp.
"About time, fucker," Kara said to Mon.
"This poor excuse for a battle has interrupted my training," Mon said irritably.
"No fair. It was supposed to be between Supergirl and me," Metallo's head said bitterly.
"There is no fair in battle, only victory or, in your case, defeat," Mon said to him.
"I'm science's ultimate creation. What are you? Just a monkey! I belong to Project Cadmus!" Metallo cried out.
"Not anymore," Mon said as he blasted Metallo's head to nothing.
Mon then took the unstable Kryptonite out of Metallo's chest, put two fingers to his head, and disappeared. He then reappeared a few moments later. "You gave the white Martians another gift?" she asked.
"I gave the white Martians another gift," he confirmed. Mon then lifted Kara to her feet and then two looked around for Lillian and Cyborg Superman.
"Help, please!" Lena said still on the floor.
"Can you pick that up," Kara asked of Mon.
The next morning, Kara came into the Catco office with a smug-looking expression on her face. "Well, I told you so," she said to Snapper.
"She was guilty, yesterday. She's innocent, today," Snapper said simply.
"Is that how the news works?" Kara wondered.
"It is here," Snapper muttered. "Now, get me an exclusive on Lena Luthor. Try to spell exclusive right."
"You know who else can't spell: Lois Lane and she won two Pulitzers," Kara shot back.
"Kiss my ass," Snapper said walking away.
Kara then walked over to James. "Any sign of Lillian Luthor?"
"There was a helicopter nearby. Who knows?" Kara shrugged.
"You were right about Lena," James admitted.
"Uh, yeah, because I was with her during the exact same time the video said she was stealing Kryptonite," Kara said obviously.
"Wait...the fuck?" James asked her.
"Yeah, I don't go off hunches. I'm into cold hard facts," Kara said seriously.
"You tell me important shit like that. You tell the police important shit like that," James said outraged.
"How about you trust me to know what the fuck I'm talking about?" Kara asked rhetorically.
"Trust but verify," James told her. "I was just trying to protect you," James said to her.
"And I was just trying to protect you," Kara replied back.
"Let's go back to the days when we didn't give a shit about each other's safety," James suggested.
"Sounds good," Kara smiled.
Washington DC
President Donald Trump leaned back in his chair in the oval office with Chief of Staff Reince Priebus standing by. Trump pushed a button on his desk and immediately a secretary came in to give him a Coca Cola. "I've been thinking...," Trump began.
"Oh boy," Priebus braced for it.
"As my first official act, I want to pardon Lillian Luthor. She's got a good head on her shoulders," Trump considered.
"That's a horrible idea, Sir," Priebus objected.
"Get me the pardon form or whatever," Trump ordered.
Priebus sighed and got the form for Trump to sign. "If you do this, you will be freeing someone that almost caused human extinction."
"Yeah, but morality is about intentions, not consequences, or is it the other way around. I get them mixed up," Trump admitted.
"I know your base loves the Luthors but this is politically bad. You got the State of the Union to do. You just shit-talked against the entire establishment at your inauguration," Priebus advised.
"Did you see those crowds? Biggest crowd ever," Trump said impressed with himself. He then took out his presidential pen as if to sign in.
"Please, dear God, don't sign it," Priebus pleaded.
Trump smiled as he hovered over the form with his pen. "Will I do it? Maybe I will. Maybe I won't," he said putting his pen very close to the form and circling over it like an airplane.
"Don't do it, Mr. President. For the love of God, do not sign that form," Priebus got on his knees.
"Alright, I'll just put in my desk for safekeeping," Trump said and put the form away.