A/N: thank you, dear reviewers of mine!
Sage: he he.you're clever! Always points out the lil tiny details. thanks,
it's constructive!
mozartrox05: I love your way of working.so, if I review your story again, you'll review mine? He he, then I can't wait to see the next chappie! Lol, I would always review your story, I don't need a carrot!
Giggy girl: two reviews! You must be really bored!!!!! Or a tad bit insane! Of course I'll keep reviewing your story.what do you think I am!
Miriam G: I don't care if you think your reviews are lame, just keep reviewing!!!!!
CarminaBurana: no need to thank me for the review, I review when I have pleasure reading the fic, so thanks to you for writing a good fic!
Elven ice angel: ok, I want at least 1000 words in your review. Yes, you're the queen of long reviews *bows to ground* HAPPY??? Hey, when do you update????
Fire'N'Ice: you'd better update soon!!!!! He he, I love them having a bond!
MysticalWoodElf: hey, let me now if you're still alive after the tornado! So REVIEW!!!!! He he he!
Me: whoa.you figure things out very well!!!!! You even pointed out things I wrote unconsciously, like the thing with the blood! Why don't you write a story yourself? I'm sure you'd make something good!
SunKitten: glad to hear you give Molly as much credit as me!
Disclaimer: see previous chappie if you're stupid enough to even think I could be JKR and own HP...
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Chapter 5:
The storm has now begun and the library is dark. Nobody is there, but it is only the second day of school after all. And at least, Pansy won't follow me in there; I'm not even sure she knows where the library is. The only sound that can be heard is the ruffling of the pages that Mrs Pince is currently reading.
I climb the metallic stairs and head to the alchemy section. It is always deserted and the darkest place in the library.
I don't have homework to do since I've done it during lunch time, so I just sit on the floor. It's not freezing like in the dungeons. The green carpet is think and warm. Heavy drops crash against the windows, but it doesn't succeed in washing the dirt off them, just like nothing can wash my guilt away. I don't know how long I've already sat there. My mind has once again been wandering about my life and once again I come up with the same statement.
'Draco, you're worthless'
Why don't I end it all? I still have the knife I used this morning. It would be simple; I've done nothing but hurt people.
No, I can't! I have to stand against Lucius. Suicide is weakness.
'Oh, come on, you don't care about what he thinks of you. You don't care if he's happy you died.'
I retrieve the knife from my pocket and slowly put it on the floor. The silver blade shines on the green carpet. Slytherin colours. How ironic, this house has never given me anything, only that damn pride that makes me hesitate now.
I have lived alone, I'll die alone. I haven't got any family, nor a name and forget about friends. Nobody will regret me, I never really existed as a person. In fact, I'm already dead... If I was born one day.
This time, I put both my sleeves up. The bandage on my left arm is completely crimson and my arm is numb. Just like in the morning, I apply the knife on my skin. Its coldness reminds me of my father. Again, I start to cut methodically through my skin. My left arm is still bleeding from this morning and my right arm slowly becomes like the left one.
"Just what do you think you're doing?"
I jump at this and it makes the knife cut deeper. Hell, it's painful! Oh no, nobody should have seen me. I don't want them to try and get me back. Dumbledore would try to help me, even if he hates me.
However, this is not "somebody". Well, not exactly. The person in front of me is translucent and silvery.
"Wanted to make my death worthless, didn't you" it whispers.
I blink a few times. My vision is blurry and I have to wipe my tears away before focusing on the ghost.
Hannah.
"And I thought I had finally done something useful in my life. And now, you want to destroy my work?"
"Hannah?" I finally manage to get out.
She smiles at me.
"He he, you know my name, I'm impressed!"
"How can you be so cheerful? You were killed only a few days ago!"
Oops, I don't think Mrs Pince will appreciate my yelling. How can I think about her now? The girl who's dead because of me is in front of me!
How can she stand in front of me like nothing happened, by the way? Does she enjoy the sight of me being tortured? Yes, she is there to haunt me. That's what she is proud of: she has destroyed me.
"I know I'm responsible of your death, but you're wasting your time if you want to make me suffer, I'm already sufficiently tortured by my conscience."
My bitterness seems to startle her. Does she really think I would enjoy her death? She looks like she's on the edge of crying.
"But what do you think? I have other things to do! However, I would be grateful if you could stop playing with knives, you might do something stupid."
"Why are you here?"
"You shall see soon."
She disappears. I rest my head against the mahogany bookshelf. Was this just a dream? I mentally kick myself: I don't know many people that would just fall asleep while attempting to commit suicide!
"Hannah, what have I done?" I whisper.
"You haven't done anything, your father did."
The voice is sweet and distant. I smile a little. She's still around, and somehow, it makes me feel safe.
I look down at my arms. Blood is dripping on the floor and I sigh heavily. What would have suicide brought? Peace? I don't deserve it. It would have brought nothing.
I won't try to commit suicide again. I just want to see Hannah again.
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*Ginny's POV*
Oh Merlin! I just wanted to escape my problems and had headed to the library. I had sat on the floor of the magical creatures section, on first floor. I heard some voices behind me. It was strange because nobody ever goes to the alchemy section.
I wanted to get rid of my problems and be in peace for a few hours. I just ended with the problems of somebody else. Somebody deep down in Hell.
I didn't recognise the voices, but one was obviously a ghost called Hannah. The boy said she was dead only a few days ago, can it be Hannah Abbott?
I don't understand anything and now, on top of everything, I have a wonderful headache. The boy is still in the alchemy section. I could just see who he is. Hum, bad idea... But I'm too curious.
I slowly stand up and walk carefully to the corner. Ok, I simply hope he doesn't look in that direction!
Draco Malfoy is sitting on the floor his head is resting against the bookshelf and his eyes are closed. My eyes travel down his arms. They are all bloodied and there is more blood on the floor. Merlin! What happened to him? Has he done some self-mutilation? There's a knife lying on the floor in front of him.
I look at his face. The dry tears mark his face. I didn't know Malfoy was capable of crying.
I get out of the library as silently as I can. That's no big deal; I'm used to be silent when I go out for my regular night strolls.
I need to tell somebody. I can't take this burden alone. I have many friends, but I don't know someone who I could trust enough with this. I want to tell mum, but she is a teacher now, and even if we are real close, I don't know if she'll react like a mother or like a teacher.
I'll tell her.
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he he, REVIEW PLEASE!!!!!!!!! But if you push the magic button just to flame and ease your mind, then go out and scream as loud as you can, it's really calming. Then, you're allowed to come back and make some constructive criticism.
mozartrox05: I love your way of working.so, if I review your story again, you'll review mine? He he, then I can't wait to see the next chappie! Lol, I would always review your story, I don't need a carrot!
Giggy girl: two reviews! You must be really bored!!!!! Or a tad bit insane! Of course I'll keep reviewing your story.what do you think I am!
Miriam G: I don't care if you think your reviews are lame, just keep reviewing!!!!!
CarminaBurana: no need to thank me for the review, I review when I have pleasure reading the fic, so thanks to you for writing a good fic!
Elven ice angel: ok, I want at least 1000 words in your review. Yes, you're the queen of long reviews *bows to ground* HAPPY??? Hey, when do you update????
Fire'N'Ice: you'd better update soon!!!!! He he, I love them having a bond!
MysticalWoodElf: hey, let me now if you're still alive after the tornado! So REVIEW!!!!! He he he!
Me: whoa.you figure things out very well!!!!! You even pointed out things I wrote unconsciously, like the thing with the blood! Why don't you write a story yourself? I'm sure you'd make something good!
SunKitten: glad to hear you give Molly as much credit as me!
Disclaimer: see previous chappie if you're stupid enough to even think I could be JKR and own HP...
°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°
Chapter 5:
The storm has now begun and the library is dark. Nobody is there, but it is only the second day of school after all. And at least, Pansy won't follow me in there; I'm not even sure she knows where the library is. The only sound that can be heard is the ruffling of the pages that Mrs Pince is currently reading.
I climb the metallic stairs and head to the alchemy section. It is always deserted and the darkest place in the library.
I don't have homework to do since I've done it during lunch time, so I just sit on the floor. It's not freezing like in the dungeons. The green carpet is think and warm. Heavy drops crash against the windows, but it doesn't succeed in washing the dirt off them, just like nothing can wash my guilt away. I don't know how long I've already sat there. My mind has once again been wandering about my life and once again I come up with the same statement.
'Draco, you're worthless'
Why don't I end it all? I still have the knife I used this morning. It would be simple; I've done nothing but hurt people.
No, I can't! I have to stand against Lucius. Suicide is weakness.
'Oh, come on, you don't care about what he thinks of you. You don't care if he's happy you died.'
I retrieve the knife from my pocket and slowly put it on the floor. The silver blade shines on the green carpet. Slytherin colours. How ironic, this house has never given me anything, only that damn pride that makes me hesitate now.
I have lived alone, I'll die alone. I haven't got any family, nor a name and forget about friends. Nobody will regret me, I never really existed as a person. In fact, I'm already dead... If I was born one day.
This time, I put both my sleeves up. The bandage on my left arm is completely crimson and my arm is numb. Just like in the morning, I apply the knife on my skin. Its coldness reminds me of my father. Again, I start to cut methodically through my skin. My left arm is still bleeding from this morning and my right arm slowly becomes like the left one.
"Just what do you think you're doing?"
I jump at this and it makes the knife cut deeper. Hell, it's painful! Oh no, nobody should have seen me. I don't want them to try and get me back. Dumbledore would try to help me, even if he hates me.
However, this is not "somebody". Well, not exactly. The person in front of me is translucent and silvery.
"Wanted to make my death worthless, didn't you" it whispers.
I blink a few times. My vision is blurry and I have to wipe my tears away before focusing on the ghost.
Hannah.
"And I thought I had finally done something useful in my life. And now, you want to destroy my work?"
"Hannah?" I finally manage to get out.
She smiles at me.
"He he, you know my name, I'm impressed!"
"How can you be so cheerful? You were killed only a few days ago!"
Oops, I don't think Mrs Pince will appreciate my yelling. How can I think about her now? The girl who's dead because of me is in front of me!
How can she stand in front of me like nothing happened, by the way? Does she enjoy the sight of me being tortured? Yes, she is there to haunt me. That's what she is proud of: she has destroyed me.
"I know I'm responsible of your death, but you're wasting your time if you want to make me suffer, I'm already sufficiently tortured by my conscience."
My bitterness seems to startle her. Does she really think I would enjoy her death? She looks like she's on the edge of crying.
"But what do you think? I have other things to do! However, I would be grateful if you could stop playing with knives, you might do something stupid."
"Why are you here?"
"You shall see soon."
She disappears. I rest my head against the mahogany bookshelf. Was this just a dream? I mentally kick myself: I don't know many people that would just fall asleep while attempting to commit suicide!
"Hannah, what have I done?" I whisper.
"You haven't done anything, your father did."
The voice is sweet and distant. I smile a little. She's still around, and somehow, it makes me feel safe.
I look down at my arms. Blood is dripping on the floor and I sigh heavily. What would have suicide brought? Peace? I don't deserve it. It would have brought nothing.
I won't try to commit suicide again. I just want to see Hannah again.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
*Ginny's POV*
Oh Merlin! I just wanted to escape my problems and had headed to the library. I had sat on the floor of the magical creatures section, on first floor. I heard some voices behind me. It was strange because nobody ever goes to the alchemy section.
I wanted to get rid of my problems and be in peace for a few hours. I just ended with the problems of somebody else. Somebody deep down in Hell.
I didn't recognise the voices, but one was obviously a ghost called Hannah. The boy said she was dead only a few days ago, can it be Hannah Abbott?
I don't understand anything and now, on top of everything, I have a wonderful headache. The boy is still in the alchemy section. I could just see who he is. Hum, bad idea... But I'm too curious.
I slowly stand up and walk carefully to the corner. Ok, I simply hope he doesn't look in that direction!
Draco Malfoy is sitting on the floor his head is resting against the bookshelf and his eyes are closed. My eyes travel down his arms. They are all bloodied and there is more blood on the floor. Merlin! What happened to him? Has he done some self-mutilation? There's a knife lying on the floor in front of him.
I look at his face. The dry tears mark his face. I didn't know Malfoy was capable of crying.
I get out of the library as silently as I can. That's no big deal; I'm used to be silent when I go out for my regular night strolls.
I need to tell somebody. I can't take this burden alone. I have many friends, but I don't know someone who I could trust enough with this. I want to tell mum, but she is a teacher now, and even if we are real close, I don't know if she'll react like a mother or like a teacher.
I'll tell her.
°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°
he he, REVIEW PLEASE!!!!!!!!! But if you push the magic button just to flame and ease your mind, then go out and scream as loud as you can, it's really calming. Then, you're allowed to come back and make some constructive criticism.