Chapter VIII- And If Answers Really Shed No Light…

Some issues are better left alone, some things better left unsaid. Yet, when too much has been said, there's no turning back. And if you do backpedal, there will always be one more loose end to worry about.

That was what Setsuna felt. As she lay on a side in her bed, watching the sunrise drive away another sleepless night, she thought back on the changes of recent days. She and Michiru had come to a silent truce, that had staved off any further frictions, but not eased things between them.

That was what Michiru and Haruka felt, as well. The sandy blonde had convinced her partner not to press the issue any further, but they both knew the settlement could only be temporary.

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"No, you're not having Haruka-papa's chocolate pancake for breakfast and that's final!"

The blonde mentally cursed whoever had thought of calling their house at that critical hour, and was keeping Michiru on the phone for so long. Fighting to spoon-feed Hotaru had proved a particularly difficult task for the "papa" in question. She had pleaded and coaxed, but the baby stubbornly refused the proffered spoon, instead pointing her chubby fingers at Haruka's plate and letting out expressive yelps.

Sitting opposite from them at the table, Setsuna—much more at ease around the blonde—watched the exchange in amusement.

"This is baby food, and that means it has your name on it, squirt! No, not my plate, that's grown-up food, bad!"

"I think she just wants whatever you're having" Setsuna provided in a relaxed tone.

"Oh? Well, I'm having this yummy…stuff…see, Hotaru? This tastes much better than the yucky pancake, it's absolutely delic—ugh!" She tried the baby food and immediately made a grimace of disgust. "No wonder you won't eat it, my bike fuel must taste better!"

Hotaru erupted into gleeful giggles.

Setsuna smiled dreamily—a smile that swiftly turned to an expression of discomfort, as the—now familiar—sensation of dread crept up her spine. The prospect of another vision approaching almost made her sick. The terror mounted inside her for no apparent reason, and she knew she would live it again.

"Not now, damn it…"

The edges of her vision darkened as the terrifying dream overtook her again. She fought for a grip on reality, but quickly lost the battle. All the surrounding noises were muffled, and the objects around her seemed to lose shape, as blackness build around her in the same confining sphere.

"Setsuna?"

Haruka watched in shock as her friend leaned heavily against the edge of the table. Setsuna's breaths came out short and erratic, and small beads of sweat appeared at her temples. She gripped the wooden edge so tightly that her knuckles had gone white.

"What's happening to you…?"

The young woman's whole body seemed to shake slightly, while her fingers still grasped the table for support. Eventually, her grip seemed to relax, and the shaking subsided. She let out a long sigh and leaned her head against her arm in exhaustion.

"Still claiming there's nothing wrong?"

Michiru's voice came from the doorway. Despite the underlying irony, concern pervaded her words. As Setsuna raised her eyes, she saw the other reaching her a glass of water. Silently, she nodded her thanks and took a long sip, enjoying the sensation of the cold glass against her palm.

That moment, she made her decision.

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"You're right. It is something serious. I'm…not sure I want to talk about it."

"Why don't you trust…"

"This has nothing to do with trust."

"Then let us help!"

Setsuna gave the two a tired smile.

"I don't think you can."

She took a deep breath, and another sip of the cold water. Then, she gestured for them to sit at the kitchen table. Taking a seat opposite to the two, she straightened her shoulders and begun her confession.

"It's true. Something is happening, not only to Tokyo in general, but to me in particular. I have tried to get to the bottom of it, but I'm worn out and still no closer to an answer. And I don't think one will come forth any time soon."

Matter-of-factly, in a tone that betrayed neither fear nor sadness, she talked about the nightmares, the loss of her powers and the feeling of vulnerability that came with it. Haruka and Michiru listened to the whole story, and in each word, they searched a way out of the crisis. But no solution was apparent.

As Setsuna spoke further, the aqua-haired girl distinguished confusion in her tone, a note of insecurity she had never heard before. The Guardian of Time had always had an air of mysterious certainty about her—and without it she resembled the incredibly sad picture of a lost child still clinging to the illusion of the right way.

"Why did you let this happen?"

Michiru's sudden question rang out in the well-lit kitchen.

"You've always known things…so why not now? Why can't you tell what's wrong this time?"

Setsuna raised the glass to her lips once more, pondering the answer. When she spoke again, her tone was even and unaffected as before, yet her gaze betrayed insecurity.

"I've asked myself the same question countless times. I never saw any of this coming… or… maybe I've read the signs wrong." She shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. "You know I can't see the future, Michiru… It's not like I study the time stream like an open book… I don't have a list with all the possible outcomes of our lives. I have very little foreknowledge."

Puzzlement showed clearly on the others' faces. Setsuna tried to find a better way of explaining.

"What I have is instinct—no, intuition. It is in my blood, the ability to feel the right course of action, the key points at a certain moment in time, the changes made in the time stream… The fabric of Time itself is weaved within my mind and my soul…that is the heritage of Cronos' bloodline."

"When I feel something is about to go wrong, I consider my options. My intuition leads me to choose the right one… but it is not foolproof, not by far. It simply…tends to be right more often than not. Yet deep inside, I would always second-guess myself…if I had the time to." Her lips formed a small smile. "You'd be amazed to know how little time the Guardian herself actually has. Supervising the thousands of futures and realities of our world…I can't exactly take them one at a time. It would take me a millennium to make sure just things go they way they should for one minute."

"That's…incredible…" Haruka exclaimed. "I've always wondered how you did it…but…this is all…"

"Not what you expected?"

The sandy blonde simply nodded.

"It was my intuition that led me to come to this dimension, to bring Hotaru here, and ask for help raising her." Uncertainty once more became evident in her stance. "Perhaps it was wrong. Yet…I can't detect any changes in the time stream. But I'm not even sure I still possess that ability…"

Her attitude was not one of self-pity, and it was not a call for help. They had asked for the facts, and she had tried to lay them out as objectively as possible. And they all knew, they had absolutely nothing to work with.

"Get dressed", Michiru suddenly instructed in a no-nonsense tone, "and I'll get Hotaru ready too. We have to go out so she's coming with us."

The sudden change in topic puzzled the other two, but she was quick to offer a reason.

"That was Usagi on the phone. They think they have some new information. I said we'd meet them at the temple in an hour."

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AN: Preview of the next chapter:

"I think I might know where the creatures come from."

xxxxx

"…it all began with the end of Mugen Academy…"

…

"As you all know, a total eclipse of the Sun will occur in two days."

…

"That's impossible."

…

"Does that mean Pharaoh 90…or something worse… is on its way again?"

xxxxx

"I'm…not sure yet. We can't know why the Sailor Planet Attack can defeat them."

"It can't".

"What if more of them come through!"

But before we get there, I need to hear a comment or two;) thank you for staying with the story! Ja ne!

Myosotis