"How are you feeling, Dr. Cameron?" Meredith was checking the patient's monitors.

Cameron smiled. "Just call me Cameron."

Meredith returned the smile. "Okay, Cameron. How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine," Cameron assured her. "Really," she added off the other doctor's dubious look.

"Everybody lies," House declared, not taking his eyes off the television.

Cameron slyly observed House out of the corner of her eye. She would be okay with him on the case. She was stirred from her comforting thoughts by a strange feeling, almost like she was twitching. It intensified and Cameron lost any semblance of control. She slipped into unconsciousness…

---x---

"She's seizing," House yelled, searching through the supplies. He rolled her onto her side, grabbed the syringe of Ativan Meredith held out, and quickly injected it into her leg. The effect was almost instantaneous. She calmed and he eased her onto her back just as a team of nurses and doctors, Foreman and Chase included, rushed in.

"Get a Glasgow. Check her for signs of meningism or rash. Do a full system exam." He glanced at the immobile group before him. "Well? What're you waiting for? Go!" He shuffled over to Shepherd. "Any idea where I can get my hands on a white board?" Off Shepherd's nod, House beckoned his team. "Time for differential."

---x---

Alex, Izzie, and Cristina were each jockeying for a better spot outside the room now occupied by House and his team.

"Ouch! Alex!"

"Quiet, model."

Cristina rolled her eyes and shoved the other two apart, stepping right up next to the door and leaning in close to the keyhole. "I should be in there. I'm Foreman's intern!"

"And I'm Chase's," Izzie pointed out, moving up next to her friend.

They both turned to Alex.

"What?" he asked. "Meredith and the other girl are doing the Glasgow and exams."

"Other g – Alex! George is not a girl."

"You got a better explanation?"

Cristina smirked. "He kinda is, Izzie."

Izzie rolled her eyes but let it drop. It was hard to hear the team inside over the arguing. She strained to make out anything but nothing she managed to catch made sense – "seizure," "criminal record," "wombat." She shot Cristina a confused look and received a shrug in response.

Alex, who had heard absolutely nothing, angrily declared, "I hate women."

"Alex!" the other two admonished, still struggling to hear. But the room had gone silent. They all exchanged curious looks and when they glanced back at the door, came face to face with a pair of legs and a knotted wooden cane. Their eyes traveled upward, sheepish expressions already firmly upon their faces.

"Hello," House greeted them.

"Hi," they chorused, standing up straight.

Izzie tried to stammer out an explanation. "We were just – We were gonna – You're seriously an amazing doctor."

Foreman appeared. "Please, like he needs to hear that more often."

Cristina stepped forward and extended her hand. "Dr. House, sir, I'm with Izzie for once. And I'm so sorry about Dr. Cameron being sick."

House studied her. "No, you're not. I hate ass-kissers but you're an intern; you're bred for it. So make yourself useful: go fill my Vicodin."

Cristina took the bottle with a grimace and had started trudging towards the hospital pharmacy when Foreman called, "Cristina, you coming?"

Chase chimed in. "Yeah, Izzie, c'mon."

Cristina shoved the empty bottle into Alex's hands, leaving him grumbling behind her.

"Have fun!" Cristina called behind her.

"Bite me," Alex yelled back.

"Hey, you, insignificant intern," House said, snapping his fingers in front of Alex's face. "Moon over blondes later; refill my snack now."

The intern opened his mouth to complain but House cut him off.

"You're mine until I leave so get used to it. Now shoo. I have a sick employee and I don't like interviewing."

---x---

House limped down the hallway. He was getting annoyed with the admiring looks everyone kept giving him. It almost made him miss the Princeton-Plainsboro staff. Their unadulterated contempt never got old. The only plus side was at Seattle Grace, they were still too scared to approach him. Back home, even the nurses were starting to grow backbones. Some even dared to refuse him Vicodin. House shook his head at the thought. The nerve of some people.

Chief Webber cornered House in the bathroom. The man was better than Cuddy at trapping him. The diagnostician knew when he was beat and eased himself onto a chair.

"Dr. House. I spoke to your boss."

House put on a sympathetic front. "And now you have a headache? Vicodin clears that right up. I'd offer you some but I don't want to."

The Chief fixed him with a stern glare. "I don't appreciate your attitude, although it isn't unexpected. You have quite a reputation."

"That's what the hookers always say."

Webber studied the man before him, holding his gaze for only a moment. Then House pulled out his GameBoy. Webber sighed and rubbed his brow. "Well, then. Dr. Cuddy said for you to call her when you get a chance."

The other man pretended to deliberate before shaking his head slowly. "Nah. The only perk of talking to her is the view." House moved his hands in half circles on his chest. He shook his head again, as if to clear it. "Ooh, what a rack."

The Chief took another stab. "Any ideas as to the diagnosis?"

"Yeah."

"Care to share?"

"No."

"All right then. If you'll excuse me, I have actual work to do."

"Buh-bye," House waved cheerfully. He returned his attention to his GameBoy. "Level 15, your ass is mine."

---x---

Chase ran his hands through his hair in exasperation. "This doesn't make sense! Glasgow score is 9/15. She's got a fever, BP is 140/70, and the heart is 86 beats per minute. But there's no signs of meningism or rash and all the tests were fine." He looked over at Cameron, shaking his head at the oxygen mask covering most of her face. He never thought he would actually miss the girl. "What's wrong with her?"

"That, my little koala bear, is the million dollar question." House appeared in the doorway, leaning heavily on his cane.

"Wow, you're actually visiting a patient."

His boss shrugged. "No one else lets me use their TV. The coma patients actually have families here."

"Imagine that."

Dr. Shepherd entered the room with Meredith. "Got anything yet?"

"Yeah, she's cured. Can't you tell?"

Shepherd literally bit his tongue to keep from retorting. There would be plenty of time to deal with House after he made the diagnosis.

House knocked Chase's shoulder with his cane, gesturing for the young man to get up. He complied and House settled into it, discreetly rubbing his leg.

Derek decided to try a different approach. "Listen, Dr. House. This young woman is counting on you to save her life. When I gave her a list of diagnosticians, she didn't even look at it. She knew who she wanted because she trusts you to save her. Her exact words were 'I want House.'"

Chase and Foreman tried unsuccessfully to stifle their laughter with their hands. House glared, hauled himself to his feet, and smacked them both upside the head. He fell back into the chair and popped open his Vicodin bottle, tossing a pill into the air and catching it in his mouth.

Chase's cell phone rang. "Hello?" He listened for a minute and handed the phone to Chase. "For you."

"If its Cuddy, tell her I died. Maybe then I can skip clinic duty."

Chase shook his head. "It's Wilson."

House grabbed it. "Wilson…Oh, hello, Cuddles." He shot Chase a glare and ran his finger across his neck in a slicing motion.

"C'mon, Izzie," Chase said.

"Where are we going?"

"Anywhere with a locking door." Chase practically sprinted down the hall.

"House," Cuddy began. "How's Cameron?"

"You mean besides that fact that she's dying?"

"Yes," Cuddy answered tersely.

"Then she's fine and dandy. Except for that seizure. So what's up? Did you girl for some girl talk?" House asked, mimicking a teenage girl. "Ohmigod, did Brad, like, call you or something?"

"Just shut up, House. Call me when you know what's wrong with Cameron."

"Fine, if you promise to take me off the hospital pharmacy's black list."

"Done, if you do an extra ten hours of clinic."

House paused. He eyed his leg and shook his nearly-empty pill bottle. "Deal," he sighed and hung up the phone.

"You're addicted to that stuff, you know."

House eyed the intern in front of him. She was checking the IV and monitors.

"And your point is?"

"If you know it's bad for you, why do you do it?"

"Sleeping with your boss is bad. Why do you do that?"

Meredith's head whipped up. "How did you…?"

House smirked smugly. "I'm a genius, remember?"

Trying to salvage her dignity, she told him, "We're not sleeping together anymore."

"Why? Is he married?"

"As a matter of fact, yes," she admitted.

"What's wrong with that?"

Meredith started to explain but stopped. "You're just trying to get a rise out of me to amuse yourself."

House grinned. "I bore easily."

"Yeah, well you're a bastard." She turned a walked out of the room.

"So I've been told," he called after her. To himself, he said, "Gregory Bastard House. Catchy."

---x---

"Here's those labs you wanted, Dr. Chase."

Chase smiled warmly. "Thank you, Izzie."

Izzie sighed inwardly. That accent was so hot! And those blue eyes… She took a deep breath. Cool down, Iz. You are not a slut. There is no need to hook up with every guy you meet. So what if you're all alone in a room with a locking door?

"Hey, Iz, look at this for a second, would you?"

She walked around the table and squinted at the paper. "What?"

"Does that say the original CT was clear or unclear?"

"Uh, clear."

Chase glanced up, shooting her that damn smile again. "Thanks."

Izzie nodded. Those blue eyes… "Screw this!" She kissed him long and hard. Pulling away, she touched her lips happily. "So sorry," she said, not meaning it in the least bit. "That was…completely unprofessional." He pulled her back. She giggled. "But who cares about that?"

---x---

Alex leaned back in his cafeteria chair, looking self-satisfied. "Yeah, I'm having a blast as House's intern."

Cristina rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. He ignores you unless he needs a pill refill."

The others laughed and Alex glared.

Meredith leaned forward. "So what's Chase like, Iz?"

"Who cares?" Cristina shook her head. "All I wanna know is whether you've jumped his bones yet."

Izzie looked away, reddening slightly. "No."

"You did! Don't lie!"

"We only made out!" Izzie exclaimed.

"Tell me everything!" Meredith said, shooing Alex and George away with a wave of her hand.

---x---

Foreman slammed the table with his fist. "Why is it that when it really matters, we can't find the diagnosis?"

"I don't know, mate." Chase shook his head, flipping futilely through Cameron's file. He kept seeing Izzie's face and even he of the minute moral compass felt guilty about that. Cameron was lying on her death bed and he was hoping to get laid. 'You suck,' he told himself angrily. Then he added, 'But you've still got it.' Out loud, he repeated, "I just don't know."

Foreman stroked his chin. "You know, I never really liked her. But she grows on you. You don't even realize its happening."

"Kinda like a fungus," a familiar voice commented. Its owner came into view.

"Shut up, House," the other two ordered angrily.

"I was kidding. Geez Louise, you guys are touchy." He pulled up a chair and sat. "And the reason this is so difficult is because it really matters. Emotions keep you from thinking clearly. That's why I avoid them."

Foreman nodded. "So basically you're rude to everyone so that you're better able to think of rude things to say to them?"

"Damn straight. But I said it better. Your way makes me sound like a miserable misanthrope."

"As opposed to the sunny people person you really are?"

"Finally, someone understands me!"

---x---x---

Wow, the response to this fic has been overwhelming, to say the least. Thank you to everyone who reviewed. I hope this chapter lives up to your expectations. And to answer the question of length: I don't know. I'll keep going until I feel it has to end and I'm not sure how long that may be. Thanks again!