Author's Notes: In this continuity, CW Elseword Part 1 and 2 take place right before Adventures of Supergirl Season 5. Elseworld Part 3 is featured in Adventures of Supergirl Season 4 in a now-deleted timeline and is disconnected to the events of Part 1 and 2.
Earth-38-Smallville-Summer 2019
Kara eyed pictures of Clark growing up and some of them with his friends from high school. Martha walked over to her as she was absorbed by the photo album. "That's Lana Lane, his first crush," Martha pointed out.
"I see," Kara said condescendingly.
"And that's Chole Sullivan. She later joined a sex cult and forced her members to engage in all sorts of depravity," Martha pointed out.
"Nice," Kara smiled amused.
"She'll be sentenced this year or the next," Martha said glumly.
"I'll be praying for her," Kara said seriously.
Outside the house, Lois and Clark were working on the old truck. "We've been over this, hon," Clark refused her.
"No, you talked, I ignored," Lois corrected. "You need a new muffler," she pointed out.
"Actually, this is the tie-rod end," Clark corrected.
"Are you mansplaining to me?" Lois accused.
"Of course not," Clark backed off.
"Come on over, Kara. Back me up," Lois requested of her.
"Because we're both women? I don't follow that feminist bullshit," Kara said as she exited the barn.
"But you know the feeling, the itch, that fire in the back of your head, the siren song of a story that has to be written," Lois pointed out.
"I really don't," Kara shut her down.
"The world is going to want to know why Lois Lane went to Argo City. It could create gossip," Clark said reasonably.
"I know Catco will report it that way," Kara chimed in.
"Details, I'll make up a reason," Lois said dismissively.
"I love it," Kara said, proud of her.
"Oh, so much for truth in journalism," Clark scoffed.
"Says the reporter who writes about his own exploits as Superman. I was the first human to set foot on what's left of Krypton, to lay eyes on the Jewel Mountains, to endure the endless, torturous deliberations of the High Council," Lois said.
"I thought I disbanded the High Council the last time I was over there," Kara said confused.
"It got better," Clark informed her.
"This is one small step for Lois Lane, one giant leap in Lois Lane's career," Lois said resolved.
"More like the other way around," Kara mocked.
"Says the woman who is already the most famous, feared, and intrepid reporter on two planets," Clark said lovingly to Lois.
"And yet, someone on this farm is still making twenty-one cents on the dollar more than me," Lois said. "And it ain't Kara, honey."
"Bullshit," Kara coughed.
"I have to agree. You have higher seniority and rank on the pay scale, but I get paid more than you in specific circumstances because I get overseas, hazard, and occasionally combat pay when I go to war zones and I strategically report in high real estate locations increasing my housing allowance, all of which is tax-free. It's actually quite complicated. I can show you the figures on a spreadsheet," Clark detailed.
"Are you mansplaining, again?" Lois glared.
"Oh, shit," Kara grinned.
"You two catch up. I'm going to slam some small things really hard," Lois said pissed-off as she entered the barn with a hammer.
"Okay, just be careful on that ladder. It's really old," Clark warned.
"That ladder isn't the only thing that's old here," Kara mocked.
"You'll catch me," Lois smiled as she went up.
"Break time," Kara said handing Clark a beer. "Also, I just married into Wayne Enterprises, so I actually make one thousand times what you both make...combined."
"That's obscene," Clark shook his head dismayed.
"You could do the same if you wanted to. You could be a football player, a rockstar, a Hollywood actor but instead, you've continued this reporter act for over a decade," Kara chided.
"Says the girl that followed in my footsteps," Clark pointed out.
"Only because Cat Grant forced me to do," Kara rolled her eyes.
"How's Jimmy?" Clark asked.
"Still black," Kara said dismissively.
"And Miss Luthor?" Clark asked knowingly.
"I still haven't told her. Am I doing the right thing by keeping her in the dark?" Kara asked him.
"Our secret identities, they protect the people we love from being threatened by our enemies. There aren't a lot of things more important than that," Clark said wisely.
"I'm just sorry I have to sack the DEO and get Alex fired," Kara said somberly.
"No, you're not," Clark sensed.
"I've failed her, Clark. No matter how hard I try to make her realize how ineffectual she is, she keeps wanting to put her life in danger. She's like an adrenalin junkie," Kara said sadly.
"Kara, for ten years I watched over Chole like a hawk as she got into one mess after another. But finally, I had to learn to let her go and have her live her own life," Clark said to her.
"Even if that means a sex cult?" Kara asked.
"Even so," Clark frowned.
"I'm really glad you're going to Argo for an extended, hopefully, permanent period of time," Kara said brightly.
"So, you can have Earth all to yourself?" Clark assumed. "You know, when I went to Argo with Lois, I was experiencing our culture for the first time but she was experiencing it, too. Out there, we were both strange visitors."
"Well, it's not like you have a choice unless you want to recreate that scene from Alien," Kara said knowingly.
"What do you mean?" Clark asked.
"She's pregnant. X-ray vision: It is a bitch," Kara smiled.
"How long have you known?" Clark asked surprised.
"Since I got here," Kara said obviously.
"Who the fuck are you?" Lois shouted in the barn as Oliver and Barry suddenly materialized.
"We come in peace," Barry said to her as Lois held a hammer over her head ready to strike.
Kara suddenly sped between them. "Lois, this is Barry and Oliver from a different Earth," she said to her. "This is my cousin, Clark," Kara pointed out to Barry and Oliver.
"You mean, Superman? It's such an honor to meet you," Barry gushed.
"Oh, fuck me, right?" Kara said dismayed.
"You nearly fucked us with that alien invasion. You prevented Barry from luring the Dominators away from Earth. Instead, you used him to bring them all to Earth, so you could destroy them all," Oliver accused.
"I'm not hearing a thank you," Kara frowned.
"You're...reckless," Oliver said to her.
"Well, it's not like it's my Earth. It was a practice round," Kara said dismissively.
"My world isn't practice," Oliver said angrily.
"Whenever you recruit me to fix your fuck-up, there's going to be a cost. If you can't handle that then you can get the fuck off my Earth," Kara told him off.
"You may have saved my Earth, last time, but you have failed to earn my trust," Oliver said super-serious.
"I wish...I wish I gave a shit," Kara rolled her eyes.
"Wait, you can tell the difference between us even though we're switched?" Barry said confused.
"Actually, I can't. I just don't give a shit which one of you I'm trash-talking," Kara clarified.
"Welcome to our farm," Clark said warmly breaking the tension.
"Lois Lane of the Daily Planet," Lois introduced herself finally.
"So, we got switched," Barry said awkwardly. Oliver quickly vibrated his hand to demonstrate.
"Nice, so now the Flash is not only super-fast but also super-competent," Kara mocked Barry.
"That's harsh," Barry frowned.
"Just put a sword in Oliver's hand and see him slash all of his foes to pieces before they can even blink," Kara said enthralled by the thought of it.
"Killing isn't the answer," Clark said.
"Finally, someone understands," Barry nodded.
"Oh, please," Oliver rolled his eyes.
"So...how can we help you?" Kara asked condescendingly.
Kara, Lois, and Clark all gave a collective frown as Barry and Oliver argued over shooting arrows at paint cans. "Forget teaching Barry how to shoot arrows, our time would be better spent getting Oliver up to speed...on his speed," Kara said.
"I...actually agree," Clark said amazed.
Oliver suddenly sped off scorching the grass and then came back. Barry shot at him with an arrow right to the face. Oliver caught it just in time. "Imagine what would happen if he failed to catch it," Kara said.
"Well, Oliver would be dead and Barry would be arrested for murder," Lois said dryly.
Two arrows suddenly hit Oliver to the back from remote-controlled crossbows. Barry laughed hysterically as Oliver fell to his knees in pain, the arrows slicing into his trapezius muscles disabling his arms and shoulders. Barry then rudely took the arrows out of Oliver's back.
Oliver and Barry immediately began a verbal fight. "Is this happening? Is this real?" Kara wondered.
Barry then took off quitting the argument. Oliver sped towards him only to get tossed as Barry bent over. "This is just sad," Kara shook her head at them both.
An hour later, Kara walked out of the house and found Oliver and Barry about to give each other a bro-hug and forgive one another. "You done bitching each other out?" she asked them.
"Wait...how?" Barry wondered.
"Super-hearing," Kara said obviously. "So, I have some thoughts. I think you should smile more. Why be so serious?" Kara said to Oliver.
There was a long awkward silence. "Was that it?" Oliver asked unimpressed.
"And you need to drop your balls and get with the whole Green Arrow voice," Kara said to Barry. "You have failed this city," she said in a low demonic tone.
"I don't sound like that," Oliver said disturbed by her.
Cisco then suddenly appeared through a portal. "Cisco? I remember you. You jeopardize world security by revealing Barry had done flashpoint," Kara recalled.
"We have a situation back home. There's a killer robot destroying the city. We could use some help," Cisco said hopefully.
"I don't know," Barry said uncertainly.
"For the love of God, help us," Cisco begged.
"Alright, I forgive you for falsely imprisoning us," Barry said to him.
"Wait, you two were prison mates? Now, it makes sense," Kara said snidely.
"Let's do this," Oliver said resolved.
"Yeah," Kara seconded.
"Don't make me regret taking you," Oliver said to her.
"Please, I can visit your Earth whenever I want," Kara said to him. "Care to tag along?" she asked Clark.
"If you don't, I will, Smallville," Lois said adorably.
"Well, that settles that," Clark said and then ripped his shirt open.
Earth-1 Central City
It was night when AMAZO landed near the courthouse scattering a crowd of tourists and then threw cop cars across the street. A portal opened with Green Arrow, Flash, Superman, and Supergirl exiting in uniform. Oliver hurled electrical energy at AMAZO without effect. Barry rode his motorcycle around AMAZO and fired an explosive tipped arrow at him. As AMAZO recovered his footing, Superman blasted him with heat vision.
"Finish him," Barry said super-serious earning a laugh from Kara.
Superman went up into the air and then slammed down on AMAZO creating a crater in the street. Superman then flew over to the group. "No sign of movement," he reported.
"Nice work," Oliver complimented.
"We got lucky," Barry said darkly.
"Are you for real? Not even Oliver is that damn cynical," Kara mocked him.
AMAZO then burst from the street and immediately analyzed their powers for his own. "What the hell is he doing?" Oliver asked alarmed.
"It looks like he's replicating all of our powers," Kara said nonchalantly.
Superman rushed AMAZO and the two clashed. AMAZO punched Superman to the neck, Superman punched back to the face, and then another uppercut punch to the chest sending AMAZO into the air. AMAZO landed and regained his footing. Superman leaped up and punched AMAZO several times to the chest and face creating a dust cloud around them. AMAZO gave Superman a falcon punch to the gut, a hit to his shoulder, and then an uppercut to the jaw. AMAZO then punched Superman in quick succession with devastating hits. Even Kara winced as Superman fell to the ground stunned. AMAZO then kicked Superman into the upper floors of a building.
Oliver then sped over to AMAZO with super speed and gave AMAZO a rotating kick to the face. AMAZO attempted to punch Oliver without success as he sped back-and-forth in front of him. Oliver then punched AMAZO several times to the torso in quick succession. Oliver then sped up to a building rooftop as he considered another attack run. AMAZO was already after him shooting up into the air. With his hands, AMAZO caught Oliver and started to crush him. It was then that AMAZO realized that he was merely crushing Oliver's Flash uniform with the real Oliver already escaped butt naked.
AMAZO ignored the annoying heroes and went straight for a packed dome stadium. AMAZO punched through the dome and landed on the field. With his eyes, he looked over the crowd for any additional powers he could steal, and then his eyes glowed. Brainiac 5 stood out from the crowd with a plasma rifle. AMAZO tried to steal his powers but found nothing as Brainiac 5 was purely machine, like himself. Brainiac 5 fired his plasma rifle at full power, hitting AMAZO to the head. The beam deflected off AMAZO's head and blasted a hole in the dome.
AMAZO used super-speed to get next to Brainiac 5, took his arm, and then swiped Brainiac 5 away tearing his right arm off. Brainiac 5 hit the wall hard revealing a mechanical endoskeleton under his fake skin. He got back up and addressed the frightened crowd with the right side of his face revealing metal. "I would leave if I were you," he said calmly to them.
As the crowd raced to the exits, AMAZO and Brainiac 5 punched one another. Brainiac 5 received further damage and was on the verge of critical failure. AMAZO then targeted a young girl for termination. Brainiac 5 got in the way and was hit in the back with heat vision. He finally went down disabled. AMAZO picked up Brainiac 5 and threw him against the wall creating a crater and then punched him again tossing him outside the dome. AMAZO walked over to Brainiac 5 as he could no longer move. At this point, it was starting to rain making things even worse for our heroes.
An arrow hit AMAZO to the back distracting him. "Guys, where are we at?" Barry asked his team.
"We reverse-engineered AMAZO's operating system and whipped up a virus to wipe out his CPU," Cisco said.
"I'm not going to wipe his CPU. I'm going to send him straight to hell," Barry said super-serious.
"Are you listening to yourself?" Iris said amazed at him.
"Just bring me that virus, Cisco," Barry ordered. "I'll try to hold him off."
Barry went for a punch on AMAZO only for his arm to get caught. AMAZO slammed Barry to the ground repeatedly until his jacket sleeve came off. Barry then charged AMAZO in an attempt to tackle him at the midsection. AMAZO kept perfectly still and then tossed Barry away.
"I'm weak as fuck," Barry realized. "And yet, I must try harder."
Cisco came by and gave Barry his arrow. "You have failed this city," Barry said dramatically to AMAZO. He fired his virus-tipped arrow, straight for AMAZO's eye. Just as the arrow was about to land, AMAZO swiped the arrow away breaking it.
"Well...shit," Barry said disappointedly. Barry charged AMAZO with a punch only to be smacked aside. As Barry was about to hit the ground, Kara took hold of him.
"Nice fight," Kara smiled amused. "I got this," she said as she lowered Barry to the ground.
AMAZO suddenly appeared behind Kara and punched her hard to the head without effect. "Let's do this," Kara smirked at him.
AMAZO went for his most powerful punch. Kara dodged the punch and blasted a basketball-sized hole in his gut with her own. The force of the punch ended the rain and blasted out the windows of the nearby buildings. AMAZO then fell to the ground deactivated.
"Really?" Kara shooked her head disappointedly.
At STAR Labs, the heroes regrouped except for Kara who was fashionably late. "AMAZO has been dismantled and every piece locked up in STAR Labs vault...except for this eye. This is my souvenir," Cisco grinned.
"Great, you just put a target on your back. AMAZO can put himself back together, bust down your silly vault door, and kill your ass to take back his eye," Kara said as she entered the room with a coffee cup.
"You serious?" Cisco asked spooked.
"Nah, I'm just fucking with you...or am I?" Kara teased.
"That was quite the performance, out there," Harrison Wells complimented.
Kara gave a little bow. "I appreciate your help, but you waited until the last minute. People could have been hurt or killed," Oliver scolded.
"If I did everything for you, where would the creativity and comradery be? It took all of STAR Labs to come up with that silly computer virus that I don't even think would have worked," Kara said.
"I'm in the business of saving lives, not showboating," Oliver said to her.
"Let's chill the fuck out. You may have my speed, for the moment, but that's it," Kara faced him down.
"Maybe we should stick to this bodyswap thing. It seems to be working out pretty well," Ralph smirked.
"I will be keeping an eye on your career with great interest," Kara mocked him.
"I don't think anyone will really care if you don't switch back," Harrison agreed.
"I do. I'm really confused as to whom I'm supposed to have sex with now," Iris protested.
"Why not both?" Kara suggested.
"Caitlin, any thoughts?" Oliver asked desperately.
"Nope," she replied.
"Well, I need to get back to Metropolis and my Lois on my own Earth," Clark said.
"You are so whipped," Kara chided.
"Says the girl that kept her husband back in the future to avoid him getting himself killed in this time," Clark pointed out.
"Damn," Kara said roasted.
The others gave her an odd look. "It's a long story," she said sheepishly.
"Thank you, Clark. We couldn't have stopped AMAZO without you," Barry said appreciatively.
"Oh, fuck me, right?" Kara said offended.
Barry got in her face. "I am done with your shenanigans. You need to work with us as a team or not at all," he told her off.
"I don't think I like your insolent tone," Kara replied back with a crazed expression on her face.
"I'm sorry. I got carried away," Barry backed down.
"Oh, really? You want to be daddy, Barry? You want to run things around here? You want to wear the big daddy pants?" Kara pushed him back. "You going to cry?" she asked as she pushed him again. "Going to squirt some out?" Kara asked as she pushed him back again.
Barry actually started to cry and backed away from her. "You going to cry, big man? That's right," Kara continued to mock as Barry retreated back.
"I've assessed the situation and I'm leaving," Clark said, awkwardly taking off.
An hour later, Barry met up with Oliver, Kara, and Cisco having been royally chewed out by Iris. "So, you think this person you saw has something to do with Barry and Oliver's switch?" Kara asked incredulously. "That sounds like bullshit."
"I saw him right after these two swapped," Cisco said defensively.
"Correlation does not equal causation," Kara lectured.
"It's the best lead we have, so far," Oliver said supportively.
"You've been having trouble with your vibes lately, right? Maybe, it's that," Barry said lamely.
"No, this was beyond me. It felt like something important," Cisco said hauntedly.
"We need to see it," Oliver said boldly.
"Alright, you all need to hold onto me for this," Cisco said to them. "Preferably not my penis," he winced. Cisco then showed them a black-and-white vision of the Monitor and Arkham psychiatrist John Deegan.
"I can see everything," John said stunned as the Monitor placed his hand on his head. The Monitor then focused on those spying on him.
"Fascinating, I did not think men of this universe had this capacity. But it won't avail you. None of you can stop what has been set in motion. You're best off giving up now because nothing you can do can alter what's about to happen," the Monitor said to them.
Cisco ended the vision and threw up. "How ominous," Kara rolled her eyes not taking the vision seriously.
Oliver went over to a piece of paper and quickly drew a sketch of the Monitor and John. It conveniently showed Wayne Tower in the background. "Do you recognize this weird-ass alien?" Oliver asked Kara.
"Nope," Kara shook her head.
"But I do," a fully repaired Brainiac 5 said emerging from the shadows.
"Have you been here this whole time?" Barry asked spooked.
"He is the Monitor, a being that can control space and time," Brainiac 5 said ignoring Barry's question.
"Like Mon-El," Kara realized.
"Only, he need not touch you, physically, to send you across the galaxy. His strength and power rival your own," Brainiac 5 said to her.
"So, what's our next move?" Barry asked.
"We're going to Gotham City," Oliver said resolved.
"Well...shit," Barry sighed.