A/N: As has been the case with the last few uploads, I'm sorry about the ridiculous amount of time this chapter took to finish. I have been working on a Skyrim story in the time between uploading the previous chapter and this one, but despite alternating between two projects, my writer's block or whatever it is that has been affecting me is still present. That over the last two years I have only managed to push out a few chapters of Spectre is something that seriously annoys me, considering what my pace was before I started having issues.
Anyway, we are really close to the end now. Hopefully the wait will be much shorter next time.
Chapter 34: Resolve
After a week of nothing but military rations, it was safe to say that Kasumi was getting a little tired of the lack of variety in her diet.
Sighing in irritation as she bit down into her nutrient bar, which seemingly had been designed to have as little flavour as possible, the thief leaned back as much as she could in an attempt to get comfortable. Of course, doing so was an exercise in futility, given she was currently sitting on a metal chair that was bolted to the wall behind her. Two other chairs were attached to her own, one on the left and one on the right, the end result resembling a bench more than three distinct seats, even though an armrest separated each of them. If there was one thing all hospitals had in common aside from medical staff and equipment, Kasumi thought to herself, it was the same incredibly uncomfortable but cheap and durable type of seating. Well, that and bad food.
In fairness, the cafeteria had far better chairs than where she was currently. Well, that was an exaggeration, less unpleasant might have been more accurate, but even so, Kasumi had only eaten there once. That had been for her first meal since she had arrived back on Earth, and the constant stares she had received had been enough reason for her to never want to eat there again. Somehow, word had got round that she had arrived with Shepard, meaning she had become the centre of attention as soon as she had approached the counter. The excited whispers of both staff and patients alike as she had tried to eat in peace had quickly proven unbearable.
As a result, for every meal since then, Kasumi had spent no longer in the cafeteria than was necessary, grabbing her food before finding a quiet hallway to eat in. Shepard had joined her a couple of times, but aside from those occasions and when he arrived exhausted in the evenings at the small room the two of them had been allocated within the hospital, she had barely seen him.
His absence was due to the nearly constant debriefings he was currently being subjected to by both Admiral Hackett and other senior members of the Alliance's military hierarchy. Despite her asking him why they seemed to need to hear the same details over and over again, Shepard had steadfastly refused to discuss what was happening, stating that he had been ordered not to saying anything to anyone at the present time. In spite of that, though, she had managed to glean enough information from his body language, from the obvious stress there, about what was happening behind the scenes to have something resembling the full picture. And that alone was enough to cause her to grit her teeth in anger whenever she thought about it.
The last time Shepard had returned from the dead, he had started working with Cerberus. Not for them, but with them. That distinction, however, had been lost on most of the galaxy, which had failed to understand the threat posed by the Reapers and hence understand that Shepard had been forced to ally with the human-supremacist group out of necessity, not desire. It had taken until the Reapers had arrived for the last vestiges of doubt regarding his loyalties to abate within the Alliance hierarchy, and indeed the last of the suspicion as to whether Shepard was really who he claimed to be and not a clone or some other kind of imposter.
Now the situation from when they had been fighting the Collectors had repeated itself. While Kasumi did understand why the Alliance wanted to be sure that Shepard was indeed who he claimed to be, the timing of their sessions with him could not have been worse. He had just gone through hell yet again, as had she, and now they were both confined to the hospital, aside from whenever a sky car arrived to take Shepard to whoever wanted to speak with him next. That was why they had been given a room here, so they didn't need to leave the hospital for any reason whatsoever, even to sleep. They were as close to being in captivity as was possible without actually being in an Alliance prison.
Something told Kasumi that it was Hackett's doing that the Alliance had stopped short of actually incarcerating Shepard, and by extension herself, Rassen, and Shaela, and instead restricted them to the hospital. The admiral and Shepard had always held a great deal of respect for one another, and Hackett knew better than most just how much the younger man had sacrificed to save them all from the Reapers. But despite his rank and no doubt sympathetic attitude, clearly he had only been able to restrain the desires of his peers somewhat, not block them entirely.
If her suspicions were correct, then it had probably helped his cause that while both she and Shepard had sustained comparatively minor injuries considering how many people had died on Venture, Rassen and Shaela had not been so lucky. A group of healthy people was easy to take into custody. A group including members who had sustained serious injury and required emergency medical attention, not so much.
Both Shaela and Rassen were currently in critical condition, and the doctors monitoring them in the hospital's emergency care unit didn't know if either would make it. Rassen had been diagnosed with severe exhaustion and heatstroke, several broken ribs, and so many other injuries that one of the doctors had flat-out told her that it was a small miracle he was still alive. Despite that, though, Kasumi knew that of the two of them, Shaela was the one facing the worst odds.
Given how being exposed to unfiltered air for even a brief moment was extremely dangerous for a quarian, that Shaela had been left unprotected for as long she had been could very easily have killed her. The medics that had begun work on her as soon as Rassen had passed out had done their best to place a temporary seal across the front of her helmet with what they had to hand, but Kasumi knew deep down that the other woman's chances were remote at best. The infection that Shaela had received hadn't just been caused by inhaling the microbes present in Venture's air, it had also been a result of the dozens of cuts inflicted on her face when her mask had shattered. Given how members of the other races could easily be killed by an infection under the same circumstances if their wounds were left untreated… the implications didn't bear thinking about.
Idly, Kasumi wondered to herself just what the right word to describe the current situation was. Shepard was… well, she didn't know his exact location, but it was presumably somewhere not especially close given he was currently in a debriefing. Rassen was on the brink of death, and Shaela was somehow even closer to it than he was. And as for Garrus, she hadn't seen him since he had helped the marines rescue them on Venture. Where he could be she had no idea, and Shepard had told her that he likewise didn't know. All she had to go on was her own speculation, but presumably the Alliance were preventing him from having any contact with them. Said speculation was based on the fact that both she and Shepard had seen their omni-tools confiscated as soon as they had arrived, leaving them unable to contact anyone outside of the building. To say that was not standard hospital policy would be putting it lightly.
If there was in fact one word to describe things, she decided, it would probably be something very offensive indeed.
"Miss Goto?"
Her half-eaten nutrient bar fell from her hand as she glanced up in surprise, the food item striking the polished floor in front of her with a muffled thud, causing a multitude of tiny pieces to break off and scatter in all directions. Ignoring the mess she had made, Kasumi blinked as she realised she recognised the man standing a few feet away from her as one of the doctors who had been working on Rassen and Shaela. He was of average height, with dark skin, and he wore glasses that were almost owlish, a rare sight in this day and age. Most humans who developed vision problems elected to have corrective surgery rather than wear something that mitigated the issue. Perhaps the glasses were actually a cosmetic choice, Kasumi thought, either for the wearer's own benefit or his patients'. An attempt to make himself look wiser or make those he tried to help feel more at ease in his presence.
She had only seen him around the hospital a couple of times since he and the other medical staff had begun to try and save Rassen and Shaela, but on both occasions she had asked him if anything had changed, only to be told gently but honestly that nothing had. Quickly rising to her feet, it took all of Kasumi's self-control not to again demand an update as to their condition. The doctor looked exhausted. He had bags under his eyes, his posture was stooped, and he was breathing heavily, clearly having spent a while trying to find her. Despite her desire to know what was happening, Kasumi waited for him to catch his breath, unable to keep her hands from clenching at her sides as she did so.
The doctor took a deep breath before running a hand through his head of grey hair. "My apologies for not introducing myself earlier," he began, a small smile making its way onto his face. "I'm Doctor Keita. I wanted to tell you that Mr Voratt has begun showing signs of improvement. I've never seen anything like it, but only a few hours ago he suddenly began to heal faster than I've seen any other human do before. He's not out of the woods yet, but it's looking very likely that he'll pull through."
The sense of relief she felt threatened to buckle her knees. "And Shaela?" Kasumi asked, attempting to keep her emotions under control and only partially succeeding. "How is she doing?"
The doctor's smile wavered. "She's the same as before," he replied after a moment of silence. "My colleagues and I haven't noticed any change in her condition. With what she's endured, we're not expecting to see any improvement for a while longer, though." Another moment of silence occurred before he continued. "I must be honest with you, Miss Goto. If she does pull through, we... we have been forced to rule out a full recovery. Her injuries are too severe."
Feeling her eyes widen in horror, Kasumi opened her mouth to demand the man in front of her elaborate, only to close it as a ringing began to emanate from the doctor's omni-tool, the sound shrill as it echoed through the hallway. Instinctively, her eyes dropped to Doctor Keita's wrist as she waited for him to react to the noise. It was only after several seconds had passed without her companion moving that the thief glanced back up at his face, which caused an icy fist to close around her heart as she saw the look of shock and denial that now dominated his features.
Staring back at her, the doctor swallowed heavily before speaking. "This… this shouldn't be possible," he gasped. "What… I don't…"
Taking a step closer to him, Kasumi forced herself to remain as calm as she could. "What?" she asked, her voice cracking as she attempted to keep it level. "What shouldn't be possible?"
The first thing he was aware of was the pain.
His head felt as though it were splitting open. A boulder seemed to press down on his chest, leaving him barely able to breath. His limbs felt like lead, each one seeming to weigh ten times more than it did normally.
Rassen lay there, wherever there was, barely capable of moving, as fragmented images swam to the front of his agony addled mind, each one forgotten the moment another replaced it. Men and women in light blue armour armed with blasters. Members of an alien species with four eyes who carried comparatively slim firearms. Green stone all around him, hot to the touch under a burning sun. Rassen flinched at the heat, but he didn't even have time to wonder why it bothered him before more images appeared.
Now tiny sparks of bright blue light flew over him, each one capable of killing a person should they make contact. Occasionally they were accompanied by bolts of red energy, which despite their radically different appearance were just as deadly. Next he saw a woman, not human but something else, prone on the ground before him, her head turned away. She didn't so much as breath as he watched. For some reason, that image stayed with him even as another woman, this one a human wearing a dark bodysuit, appeared. The second woman was soon replaced by a man, his dark hair cut short in a military style.
As the stream of images continued, Rassen gradually became aware of a nearly silent beeping noise coming from a point off to his left. The steady rhythm was strangely reassuring at first, reminding him of the tapping of a foot or a calm heartbeat. Although it did not change in the slightest, as the seconds dragged on, he began to find it increasingly unbearable, however. The lack of change in the volume or timing of the beeps soon stopped being merely irritating and became maddening. Try as he might, though, Rassen found he could not block out the sound. Even concentrating on the images that continued to appear before him did nothing to distract him from it.
Slowly, so slowly that it seemed to take an age even to him, Rassen carefully opened his eyes, determined to find whatever was responsible for the beeping and make it stop. Rolling onto his side, he frowned as the culprit was revealed to be a machine of some kind. The device was the size of a standard terminal and it looked similar to one too, its most distinguishing feature being the screen at its centre. With every beep it emitted, a horizontal green line ran across its screen from the left before leaping upwards, dropping, and then vanishing. There were several numbers at the bottom of the screen in the same shade of green as well, which fluctuated seemingly at random as he watched. Despite his disorientation, Rassen still recognised the machine, feeling himself relax as he realised it was no danger to him.
His apprehension returned, however, as he began to wonder just what such a device was doing next to him in the first place. Wincing as he did so, Rassen sat up before examining his surroundings. He was in a small room with walls of polished grey metal, a white tiled ceiling, and a white floor. The bed he had awoken in was of a sturdy but still obviously cheap and light construction, clearly having been designed with mobility in mind. A glance downwards confirmed that it was actually on wheels, strangely enough.
Raising a hand to his forehead as his crippling headache suddenly became even worse for a second on account of him moving, Rassen noticed that a clip of some kind had been attached to his forefinger. Closer inspection revealed that several electrodes were present on the parts of the clip that were in contact with his skin, and a thin black cable ran from it to the medical scanner, which explained how the device was able to assess his condition. The setup was almost primitive, Rassen noted, though clearly it was still effective nonetheless.
Rotating his arm as he continued to examine the clip, the Jedi Knight paused as he suddenly felt a slight tugging pain coming from the crease of his elbow. Glancing down at the area in question, Rassen saw that a needle had been inserted there, from which a thin and colourless tube ran towards the scanner before terminating at a transparent bag hanging from a frame just behind the device. The bag was filled with what appeared to be water. Clearly he had been here long enough that whoever was trying to help him had needed to keep him hydrated intravenously.
That last observation caused Rassen to pause again. Whoever it was that had decided to help him, he had no idea as to their intentions beyond that. Shifting position slightly, he suddenly became aware that beneath the blankets that covered him, instead of being dressed in his armour and robes, he was currently wearing a flimsy gown of some kind that offered no protection whatsoever. The medical scanner suddenly began to beep much more rapidly, causing him to close his eyes as he tried to calm himself and think rationally. Whoever had seen fit to help him, they could have decided to tie him down or restrain him in some other way. That they had not was strong evidence that he was in no immediate danger and so safe for the moment.
Frowning in concentration, Rassen attempted to make sense of how he had even ended up in what was clearly a medical facility in the first place. The last thing he remembered was pain. Pain so utterly consuming that it made the agonising headache he was currently experiencing seem quaint by comparison. Before that… the woman in the dark bodysuit and the man with the short dark hair. He remembered them standing nearby, looking at him in horror. No, Rassen suddenly realised, his brow furrowing further. Not him, something else. Something more deserving of their attention than he had been in that moment.
No, not something. Someone.
A wave of memories suddenly hit him, all of them racing through his mind in a matter of seconds. When they had first met on Omega, what felt like a lifetime ago, with her running quite literally into him before hiding behind him in terror. When he had realised how she felt and told her he loved her too. Losing her and not knowing for sure if he would ever see her again. Being reunited with her after so long. Finally seeing her, truly seeing her, for the first time and kissing her deeply after telling her about all that had befallen him while they had been apart. And lastly seeing her lying there on the ground, as still as a corpse.
"Shaela."
A voice said her name, the sound of it lingering in the air for a moment before Rassen realised he was the one that had spoken. Reaching down, the Jedi Knight threw off the blankets that covered him before ripping the clip from his hand and dropping it to the floor. As he tore the IV drip from his arm, a warning tone filled the air, but Rassen couldn't have cared less as he lurched to his feet, only to stagger into the nearest wall as his knees buckled. An intense, grinding pain exploded from deep within his chest, causing him to let out a scream of agony. Or it would have been a scream if he had possessed the strength for one. Instead, it came out as more of a quiet whimper, the kind a dying animal might make.
Pushing himself away from the wall as gently as he could so as not to experience the sensation of his insides being put through a mincing machine again, Rassen wobbled for a moment without the support it had provided before getting his balance. Glancing around for ways out of the room, the Jedi Knight quickly noticed that there was only one; a door built into the wall opposite the bed. It was only a few metres away, but in his current state, it might as well have been a few hundred miles.
His arms stretched out to each side for balance, Rassen took a small step forward, wincing as a stab of lesser but still excruciating pain ran through his chest. The next step caused him to grit his teeth with the effort it took, and the one after that sent him staggering back against the same wall as before, the tendons in his neck standing out against the skin there as they threatened to tear through it.
Allowing himself to slowly slide down the wall until he was on his hands and knees, Rassen took a deep breath to steady himself, before beginning to crawl the rest of the way towards the door. To his relief, it proved far easier than walking, but his chest still felt as though it were on fire as he moved. As a result, it took him nearly a full minute to reach the door, his body drenched with sweat from the effort as he grabbed onto the right side of its frame in order to pull himself upright. The muscles of his arms trembling as though he had just spent several hours exercising intensely, Rassen barely managed to press his hand to the orange haptic interface next to the door, causing it to turn green. He collapsed back onto all fours as the door smoothly opened, separating into four segments that slid into the corners of the frame, before awkwardly shuffling out of the room.
He now found himself in a long corridor, the walls of which were lined with doors that presumably led to rooms like the one he had just exited. Dozens of patients could potentially be housed in the area, meaning he must currently be in a hospital of some kind rather than the medbay of a ship. The sheer quantity of rooms represented a total region that was simply too large to fit within even the most impressive of vessels, given the number of other facilities a ship needed to possess. That meant he must currently be on a planet, moon, or possibly even an asteroid, though the first option was by far the most likely one. Given his lack of familiarity with this galaxy, though, it could easily be a world he had never heard of.
Shaking his head to clear it of that particular train of thought, Rassen grunted as his chest erupted with pain again. Waiting for a moment until the sensation had completely subsided, he then forced himself to think logically. Since he was here, in all likelihood Shaela was as well. Both of them had been seriously injured, and it would have made little sense to transport them to different hospitals instead of the same one. He could worry about what planet they were on later; for now he had to find her.
Grunting again as his chest experienced yet another stab of pain, Rassen resumed crawling, now heading for the nearest door, which stood perhaps ten metres away. Since he had awoken in one of these rooms, it was very likely that Shaela was in one as well. And if he had to search them all to find her, then so be it.
Reaching the door sapped nearly all of his remaining energy. His body drenched with even more sweat now, Rassen hauled himself back to his feet, leaning nearly all of his weight on the section of wall just next to the door as he did so. Pressing his forehead against the cool metal, he closed his eyes at how soothing it felt against his skin, trying to block out the pain and exhaustion that wracked his body as much as he could. Only once the metal was the same temperature as his brow did the Jedi Knight finally push himself slightly away from the wall, before bringing his hand into contact with the door's haptic interface.
As the door slid open, Rassen carefully began edging his way into the room, gripping the doorframe tightly for support as he did so. Carefully leaning his back against the nearest section of wall once he was inside, he had barely steadied himself before his chest erupted with pain again for what felt like the thousandth time since he had awoken. Letting out a strangled sound midway between a grunt and a hiss, Rassen just about managed to keep himself from screaming by burying his face into the crook of his elbow. If there was a patient in the room with him, the last thing he wanted to do was disturb them while they were recovering, especially if their condition were critical.
After a moment that felt more like an eternity, the pain subsided. Finally glancing around at his new surroundings as the door closed behind him, Rassen found himself frowning in confusion. The room was very similar to the one he had awoken in, with the same kind of walls, floor, and ceiling. The one major difference, however, was that instead of a bed, a large cuboid made of some kind of opaque white material dominated the middle of the room. More than two metres long, one metre wide, and one metre tall, it could have been a huge block of ice, if not for the fact it wasn't melting.
As he stared at the strange object, Rassen found himself at a complete loss as to just what exactly it was. Indeed, it was not until a light suddenly blinked on the side of it, the faint blue glow only appearing for a second before vanishing, that he saw the cables which ran from the far end of the object to a socket built into the nearest wall. That at least told him it required electricity to function, though that still wasn't enough for him to have any idea just what it was he was looking at.
Edging a couple of steps closer, still using the wall for support as he did so, Rassen frowned, before tilting his head curiously. From his new position he could see that the cuboid was not in fact completely opaque as he had first thought. The outline of… something could just barely be glimpsed inside it. The shape was vaguely rectangular, but that was all he could tell about it at this distance. His curiosity piqued, the Jedi Knight moved another couple of steps closer, so transfixed that he entirely forgot about the possibility of his chest erupting with pain again, before carefully manoeuvring himself away from the wall so he could approach the object more directly. The rectangle gained further clarity as a result, morphing into the shape of a person lying on a bed.
Another few steps brought him directly in front of the cuboid, which he now realised had to be some kind of medical chamber. The person within it was currently unconscious as far as Rassen could tell, judging by their lack of movement, but beyond that he couldn't even tell what race they were, despite his proximity. Slowly raising a hand, the Jedi Knight found himself gently resting it against the surface of the object, which was cool to the touch. The material also proved to be as smooth as glass against his palm, there not being so much as a single bump or indentation present in its construction.
The door behind him suddenly opened, causing Rassen to flinch in surprise, his hand falling away from the chamber as two people rushed into the room. The first one he didn't recognise, but the man was presumably some kind of medical practitioner, judging by the white uniform he wore. The sight of the second person, though, caused Rassen to smile despite how they themselves looked sombre.
"Kasumi," he said warmly, a feeling of relief washing over him as he saw she was unharmed.
His heart sank as the thief didn't return the smile. "Hey, Ras," she replied slowly, her eyes looking anywhere but at his own. A few seconds of unbearable silence passed before she finally did lift her gaze to meet his, the action clearly taking substantial effort on her part. "You shouldn't be out of bed yet."
Now confused as well as uncomfortable, he was about to ask what was troubling her, only for the man next to Kasumi to speak first, adjusting the glasses he wore as he did so. "Mr Voratt," he began kindly but firmly. "I'm Doctor Keita. Please come with me back to your room. Your condition is still very precarious. How you are up and walking I don't know, but the strain you are putting on your body to do so is extremely dangerous. You need rest in order to recover."
Rassen didn't need to reach out with the Force to tell there was something terrible he was not yet aware of. "Not until you tell me what is going on," he replied as calmly as he could, fighting hard to prevent his desperation from seeping into his voice. "Is it to do with Shaela? What happened? Where is she?"
"She's right next to you."
Kasumi's blurted response caused him to momentarily freeze. Slowly, Rassen turned to face the chamber again. The person within it still hadn't moved so much as an inch, continuing to lie there as lifeless as a statue.
"What happened?" he repeated, his voice sounding dead, even to him.
The doctor's reluctance to tell him in his current state was obvious, even though Rassen kept his gaze fixed on the outline within the chamber and did not spare so much as a glance in the older man's direction. "Miss Tole's injuries were severe," Doctor Keita replied finally. "The medics that treated her were able to stabilise her enough to move her to Admiral Hackett's ship and seal her within a decontamination unit. Once you arrived here on Earth, my colleagues and I were able to remove all of the shards of her visor from her face. There will be substantial scarring, but the long term effects of most of her injuries will be cosmetic only, and the scars can easily be removed if she prefers."
The sound of blood rushing in his ears was so loud that Rassen barely heard his own reply. "Most?" he managed, his fingernails digging into the palms of his hands so hard he felt the skin there break.
The lack of an immediate reply caused him to tear his gaze away from the chamber, the speed of the action causing him to gasp as the pain in his chest exploded into life again. Breathing raggedly as he fought against the urge to pass out, Rassen staggered for a moment before regaining his balance, gritting his teeth as he just barely managed to reduce what would otherwise have been a scream of agony to a strangled hiss. He was vaguely aware of Kasumi calling his name through the haze of pain, but it was not until a hand positioned itself on his shoulder to steady him that he realised she had moved to stand next to him. Shaking off the thief's hand as she attempted to guide him into a sitting position on the floor, the Jedi Knight instead elected to remain on his feet and lock eyes with the man opposite the pair of them.
"Most?" he repeated, his voice noticeably hoarser than it had been only a few seconds previously. "What about the other ones?"
"Mr Voratt, I really think—"
"Doctor, please just tell me."
The older man slowly straightened his glasses, clearly attempting to buy himself a few additional seconds to formulate his reply. "The damage to her left eye was extensive," he began finally. "Despite that, we were able to remove the shard of her visor that had become embedded in it, as I said." He fell silent for a moment, and Rassen swallowed as he felt his fear somehow become even stronger than it had been already.
Doctor Keita straightened his glasses again, the action even slower this time, before continuing. "By the time we could actually do so, though, it was too late. The infection there had advanced too far for us to prevent permanent damage."
"Meaning?" Rassen forced out, the word seeming to catch in his throat. It was a completely unnecessary question. He knew what the doctor was saying, but he had to be wrong. He had to be imagining the worst case scenario. The Jedi Knight glanced at Kasumi, who once again refused to meet his gaze. No. No, it couldn't be. Not after everything. Not after…
Yes, Rassen. You know it is true.
His shock at the first appearance of Zaressh's voice since he had awoken was instantly quashed as his fear somehow swelled further still. "No," Rassen whispered, shaking his head at the Sith's taunt. "No, you are lying. You have to be lying."
Why attempt to deceive yourself when you have already acknowledged what the good doctor is saying to be true?
Rassen opened his mouth to retort, but terror rendered him incapable of anything other than silent denial as Doctor Keita cleared his throat. "I am truly sorry, Mr Voratt, but it is the truth," he began, clearly mistaking the Jedi Knight's panicked murmurings from a moment earlier as being directed towards him. "We did everything we could to save her sight, but Miss Tole is now blind in that eye."