Part 23
Zander let Donna in. She was carrying the baby.
"I stopped in to see Virginia," Donna explained. "Carly said go ahead and bring her up here for awhile."
"Oh, that's good," he said, letting them in.
Donna sat down on the couch, and put Ginny in the baby carrier that sat there. He had his own.
"I have something to ask of you, Alexander," she said.
"Shoot," he said. "Anything you want."
"You know how nowadays the medical profession knows so much more, and that you can inherit illnesses and you need to know your family history."
"I guess so."
"You need to know who your biological parents are. Like Carly does now. She was adopted."
"Yeah, she was. By Virginia Benson, that's where Ginny got her name."
"Well, I need, for you, Alexander, to get a blood test done."
"We had it done already."
"What?"
"We had one done. Carly was always sure, but she knew I had some doubts, so she insisted on the blood test, and I thought it was a good idea, and we got the test, which was positive, so I know I'm Ginny's father."
"Oh, that's good. That's a good thing to know, if you had doubts," Donna said, feeling flustered. She took a deep breath. "But," she said, touching his arm, "I need to have one done on you. You and someone else."
He stared at her. She let him have some time for this to sink in.
He got up. "Me?" He walked across the room. "You mean you think that I -?"
Donna nodded, nervously.
"You?" he said, a minute later. "I never thought you would. I mean, you and some – what did Dad do?"
"He doesn't know at all. Nothing. He doesn't know I even suspect."
"Who?"
"A colleague of your father's, another cardiologist."
Zander paced across the room. He walked back and sat down next to her.
"It doesn't make any difference now, Mom," he said. "I don't think we need to get into it."
"If it's true it makes a difference to what your medical history is. To what Virginia's medical history is."
Zander looked at the baby. He took her little hand and looked at her for a moment.
"OK," he said. "But what about this – guy, what if he doesn't want to do it?"
"He does. He wanted to years ago, but I was too scared. I'm sorry, Alex, I should have done it for your sake. But we were always in touch. In case something happened to me, and your father found out, I was afraid of what your father might do if he figured it out. He went to the house – he saw you. I wasn't home. He called later and asked for your picture and for your blood sample. I sent him the picture but I was afraid to get the blood sample done. You were about 10, and so you might have asked questions or told your father if he asked you what you did that day. And he always kept track of your health records and would have known something was up if I was the one who initiated a blood test."
Zander was quiet, taking this in. He stared.
Donna felt awful.
"I'm sorry, Alexander," she said.
He hugged her. "I'm not," he said. "It really doesn't matter anyway."
"It's not your fault," Donna said. "Everything was in such a fog to me then. I never knew what to do, and was certain that if I left Cam, it would separate both you and me from Peter for good."
"You did the best you could."
"I know it must be upsetting," she said. "I guess I intended never to tell you. But now that seems unreasonable, now that we have this little girl, we need to know her real family medical history."
"It's OK, Mom, really. And I still could be Dad's, anyway, right? If Dad didn't suspect anything, it must be possible."
"Possible, but I think it is more likely it is David, and I didn't want to think so, believe me, I didn't. I knew it was possible, but you – well you look like David. And he thought so too."
"He saw me but I didn't see him?"
"No, he talked to you, but you may not remember, it was only once, and you were a kid."
"You weren't home?"
"No. Your Dad was there, and Peter. David had moved out of town, and he was in town for a visit then, and went to see you, which was easy, because he and Dad had been colleagues, we had all been friends, of course. So he just went to visit Dad, and asked about Peter, and if we'd have any other children. So your father just called you boys up, luckily for David, and he was able to see you. Then when I talked to David later, on the phone, he thought like me, that you took after his family."
"I remember."
"You do?"
"Yeah, I remember the guy. He asked me about stuff. I remember him talking to me more than Pete and that was so strange that I remember him for it. I mean I can hardly remember what he looked like, but I remember the other doctor visiting like that and talking to me about tennis and windsurfing and stuff like that, and it being weird that he talked to me more than he talked to Pete."
"I'm so sorry, Alex, your father was always too harsh and I should have been doing something about it. You shouldn't have had to think it was strange that anyone might pay attention to you when Peter was around. Your father got that into your head."
"Well, he worked hard at it. But you did all you could."
"I wish I had more spirit," she sighed. "Especially then, when I needed some. I should have left and fought to get custody of Peter. I never saw anything that way. I had enough spirit to love David, but it failed me when the consequences of that were so much higher, because I had Peter. If I had left when David wanted me to – it might have worked out better, and - "
"Please, Mom, cut it out. You handled it the way you handled it. You had a point. Dad would have cut us off from Pete."
"Still, I can't help but wish I'd not been so – well, that I'd been more like Brenda."
"Brenda!" Zander's face lit up. "She'll think she's brilliant! She figured it out!"
"Well, it was more of a joke to her, than anything, dear."
Zander laughed. "She's going to love it, though. You don't mind if I tell her?"
"No, if you think she can keep it quiet, until we know for sure, and decide how we want to handle your father. We may want to leave him thinking as it is."
"It might help," Zander said. "Come to think of it, it would be good, if he were to try to take us to court so he can see Ginny."
"It might," Donna said. "That would be some good to come of it, if that leaves the courts out of it."
"I've got to tell Brenda this, even though I don't totally trust her around Dad, she runs into him over at the hotel, and if he provokes her, she might say some smart-ass thing and end up taunting him with it, but that's the worse case scenario. She just deserves to be in my confidence."
"All right, but let's try to get her to keep it under wraps."
"OK." He sat thinking for a few seconds. "Mom, do you think Dad really has no idea?"
"I always thought that, but I'm not completely sure right now. When he was talking to Brenda and I that night we ran into him, he said something – I don't want to repeat it to you, but it scared me, the way he put it."
"You can tell me. He's at least honest with how he thinks about me. It can't be worse than what I'm used to."
"He has no right to treat his two children differently, or to favor one so obviously over the other. If he suspected something, he should have come out with it."
"He pressures Pete, and if he thought I was as smart as Pete is, he'd have pressured me the same way. Some ways, I had it easier."
"One reason I don't think he suspects, Alexander, is that he would have used it against me, and been able to throw me out, along with you."
"No, he wouldn't. He wouldn't want the world to know his marriage failed. He can't fail."
"No, he would never admit to that."
"He blames you entirely, I bet. When you finally left him, it probably infuriated him. He couldn't do anything about it, and to him, that makes him failure. You know how he thinks. No - wait a minute. He blames me too, probably. Probably thinks that if I only I hadn't shot Pete, and then left, you'd have stayed with him."
"No, I'm afraid he's not good at making mistakes. Another thing, dear, let's hold off and tell Carly only when we know for sure."
"You're right. No reason to get her all riled up unless it's true."
"I don't think she'll be upset. She would want to know the truth. And she'd not fond of your father either."
"Yeah, Dad just spreads sunshine wherever he goes. Does he have any friends? Pete is the only person he even tries to be nice to, and I bet he pressures Pete enough that Pete would just as soon not have him around."
"You almost sound sorry for him."
"I am, sometimes."
Donna put her arms around him. "I love you, dear. And Ginny."
Zander took Ginny out of the baby carrier and gave her to Donna. He sat down next to Donna, thinking. Donna cooed to the baby and leaned her head against Zander's shoulder.