Part 27 NC-17
"Are you crazy, Brenda?" Ned asked her, as they looked at reports from the record company, in its offices. "I mean, have you really lost your mind?"
She laughed. "I'm in for an anti-Zander lecture, aren't I?"
"Well, he was bad enough before, but with a baby, and a baby with Carly at that, and his being younger, and so impulsive - I know he's settled down enough to go to school, but I wonder if he could pull that off without you."
"On paper, he does sound terrible."
"Off of the paper, he's got something going for him?"
"Yeah."
"I wish I understood it. I could have 'em lined up."
"Oh, I'm sure you do," Brenda said, consolingly.
"I'm glad Emily's safe from him," Ned said. "I mean, with you there, we don't have to worry."
"You sure don't!" Brenda laughed.
Zander sat half the night at Luke's Bar with Pete, telling Pete his life history from the time he'd last seen him.
"Dad doesn't know any of this, does he?" Pete asked.
"As little as possible!"
"You should've called home, though, Alex. He'd still have helped you."
"No, I can't believe that. Didn't want him to, anyway. It was when he was over in Switzerland that he realized where I was. See, Dad realized I was the one Emily talked about. You didn't, because you don't assume the worst."
"I'm still glad he found you, though."
"Are you going to stay, now that you know I'm a criminal?"
"Of course I'm going to stay! As long as I can. I know you're not really a criminal, Alex, and won't be again. You've got a little girl. But you can tell me about all of it. Is that the worst of it?"
"I would hope so!"
"OK," Peter smiled.
"Did you like Emily?" Zander asked. "Were you really good friends with her?"
"No more than any of the other patients. She had a bit wilder story, so I listened. The bus accident running from the law and how she had been kidnapped before and fell for her kidnapper."
"Did you notice her having any other guy? She called me and told me she had a new boyfriend, broke up with me over the phone. I believed it then – that's easy for me to have believed, especially then. And now I'm not so sure."
"Not that I noticed."
"Would you have?"
"Probably. I spent enough time with the patients that I knew who their family and friends were. Though she could be in touch with someone who never actually came to the clinic. She was the type, I thought, that would talk about her boyfriend. She talked about you more than the newer guy, at least, to me."
"She better have had that guy."
Pete laughed. "Odd attitude. How come?"
Zander explained. "She might have made it up, trying to let me go because she couldn't walk. She's like that. I mean, she'd do a thing like that."
"That would be awful. She didn't strike me as that manipulative."
"She is, all right. If she did do that, I'm taking what she gave. But I bet I'm supposed to feel guilty."
"That's Dad pounding that into your head. To me it's to aim higher, and to you it's that you're always screwed up. We've got to stop listening to Dad, see, Alex, it's not so easy, because he had our whole childhood to drill us. We may need a shrink."
"He needs a shrink."
Peter laughed. "Not a bad thought." He raised his glass of beer. "To Dad, getting the shock therapy."
Zander raised his glass to. "To shock therapy," he laughed.
"I'm all right, Alexander," Donna said, when he came to her room at the Port Charles Hotel the next day. He had skipped classes to do it. "Just wondering what would have been," she said. "It's sort of sad." She gave him the paper with the results.
"Are you upset?" he asked. "Were you hoping it would be negative after all?"
"I didn't think it would be," she said. "Are you upset?"
"No."
"Are you sure? I know you don't think it matters in your head. Still, it's got to be hard to get used to."
"I don't think it'll make any real difference."
"David's going to write up the family medical history, and says you can have some pictures if you want them. You don't have to meet him unless you want to."
"No. He probably has family that he doesn't want knowing about me."
"I don't think that's so, as if happens. He doesn't have children – other children, and he just got done with his third divorce. He's got a half-brother he's close to and I get the idea he'd even like that half-brother to know. He mentioned a cousin. His mother, he doesn't want her to know anything, at least, not yet. We both decided to leave Cam alone for now. No reason for him to find out unless you really need it for a court case."
"No, I'm not up for that. Dad'll just make snide comments and make it harder for you."
"I'm getting used to those, my dear."
"Of course, there's Carly. I think I'll wait for the medical history to tell her about it."
"You never know, and in case you ever need each other, for donors, or something – I think you could handle meeting him so you could keep in touch. I'd hate for something to happen to me and – now you know who David is, and you could probably find him easily any time, with his standing in medical circles, but it might be easier if you'd met him."
"Again."
"That's right, you did once before."
"I don't know. I feel dumb. How do you talk to your sperm donor father that had nothing to do with you? With raising you?"
"I don't know. Maybe it's not harder than talking to any other stranger."
"I hope not."
"He said he wished he'd been more of a family friend. He could have. I keep having regrets. If he hadn't gone out to California, it might have been different. Then I might have had the nerve to fight Cameron in a divorce, I don't know."
"It was a lot easier for you to wait until we were grown up."
"It was more stable for you, I think."
"It was, and Dad wouldn't have improved had you left. Pete – he might have had a much worse time. So don't be feeling so regretful." He went over and hugged her.
"Thanks, sweetheart," she said. "You're so understanding about all this."
"Let's talk to this David once," he said. "You and me."
"Maybe it wouldn't be much harder than talking to Cameron," Brenda said. They were walking away from a class on campus.
"You've got a good point, there! Anybody is easier than Dad. Pete and I think he needs therapy."
"Can I meet this paragon of an older brother?"
"I'll call him now if you have time."
"OK."
"He doesn't know about my paternity issues."
"I'll keep mum."
Zander and Brenda and Pete were sitting at a table and Wang Duck's. Zander listened as Brenda and Peter compared experiences of Europe.
"We're leaving you out, too much, Alex, er, Zander," Pete said.
"No, it's all interesting," Zander insisted.
"I'm going to get him over there, soon, anyway," Brenda said. "To see my sister in London. Hey, maybe you can come to London, too, Peter."
"He and Julia have a lot in common," Zander said.
"Well, she is a little old for him," Brenda grinned mischievously, and put her arm around Zander.
"That's not a problem," Zander said, and they all laughed.
"He's not so bad," Brenda said, back in her room at the hotel. "Yeah, I'm glad you have him back."
"Thanks for getting along with him, babe," Zander kissed her.
"Mmmmm," she held him closer, "I feel you are very appreciative. It's easy. He's treats you right."
Soon she was laying on top of him. He held her lightly, so she could control it all. She felt an orgasm wash over her.
She kissed his forehead and his mouth and ran her fingers through his hair. "I'll hang around if you want, or not, whatever's easiest, when you Mom brings your sperm donor."
"I think it would help to have you around." He ran his hand lightly up her back.
"If you're sure. I understand if not."
"I love you," he said, his eyes lighting up, mockingly, but his tone was sweet, and sincere.
"I love you," she whispered.
David Hayward had many reasons to be confident. But he'd never felt so nervous as he did climbing the stairs of the brownstone behind Donna.
It didn't help to see that the boy had grown into a young man who looked yet more like a Hayward than he had before. But maybe that was his imagination working in overdrive, knowing the test results, David thought.
"This is my mother - Vanessa Bennett," he said, showing Alexander the photo album he had brought. "She's a bit crazy."
Alexander exchanged glances with his girlfriend. "Oh, no," said Brenda Barrett, but her eyes sparkled a little.
"This is Leo," he said, proudly, pointing to the picture of his half-brother. "He's perfectly sane."
Alexander laughed a little. "That's good news!" he said.
"Here's my cousin, Maggie Stone, and her mother, Vanessa's sister," he went on.
"Nice," Alexander said. There wasn't much else he could say.
The baby cried from the other room. "She's up," Zander said.
"Would you like me to get her?" Brenda asked.
"OK," Zander said.
"I'll just change her and put a fresh outfit on her," Brenda said.
"You're a trooper," he grinned.
"How often do you have the baby?" David asked.
"Every other weekend, and every other Wednesday and Thursday. Whenever Carly goes out and wants to leave her with me if I'm here."
"It's lucky Carly lives right downstairs."
"That's helped a lot," Zander said. "Carly's been good about letting me drop by any time. So I feel pretty well connected to Ginny."
"This is she," Brenda said, bringing her out. "Virginia Benson Smith."
"Hello, Miss Smith," David said, trying to sound gallant. He was amazed to see her for real.
Brenda handed her to Zander, who turned towards David with her. She reached toward David. He gave her his finger. She stared at him with big eyes, holding onto his finger.
"I think she might even go to you," Donna said.
Zander let David take her. She went to him without fussing, and let him hold her up on his lap, reaching up to play with the buttons on his shirt.
"Buttons are one of her latest interests," Zander explained.
"Yeah," David said, smiling. He was thrilled to look at her. Somehow it was even more amazing having this descendant, the one he had not expected at all.
"She knows kind of," Brenda said, in an undertone, to Donna. "Guy looks like Daddy, so he's OK. That's why she sits there so calm, do you think?"
"Maybe," Donna smiled. "Yes, I think so."
A little later Donna took Ginny to feed her.
"Keep this album if you want," David told Zander. He handed him a paper. "That's everything I can think of for the Hayward family medical history."
"Thanks," Zander said.
"I put all my numbers at the end of that," David said. "You can call me anytime."
"You are OK with me telling Carly about this?"
"Of course."
"OK. She can keep it quiet. Brenda too. I didn't tell my brother. I'm not sure I will - don't see any reason."
"Whatever you think best. Are you close to him?"
"Yeah, I think so. Now we're over all that about the shooting. At least, Pete and I are."
"Your Dad isn't, you're saying."
"No, he'll never get over it."
It was quiet for a while. Zander paged through the album. "If you want your brother to know, that's fine with me," he said. "Mom thought you might like him to."
"Thank you," David said. "I'd say he's my closest friend. You're fairly philosophical about all this, though. As I said, call me any time, if you want to know something, or say something, or yell at me, whatever, I understand."
"I guess it might be more upsetting if Dad and I were close, but we're just not. Probably wouldn't be no matter what. I'm not what he thinks his son should be, biology or none. Or what anybody should be, in his opinion. Did you know him very well?"
"I wouldn't say real well, but I knew him. We were colleagues. There were a whole bunch of us. He fit in with that group. He could be gracious, friendly. To us, as his colleagues. Sometimes I thought he was a little bit arrogant. But, we all were."
"Doctors," Zander said.
"Yeah," David laughed. "Cardiologists, in fact, are the worst of doctors, even, for that."
"But you must have known more about Dad, if not directly."
"Oh," David said, shifting a little bit, feeling a little uncomfortable. "Yes, sure. I did get – well, Donna was mostly afraid of him. I thought she didn't have to be as afraid of him as she was, but she knew him better. I mean, at least, that's how it seemed to me. She might tell you something else about all that. But you feel you don't know him very well?"
"I never thought of it that way. But yeah. That's perfect. I don't know him very well."
"Maybe no one does."
"Probably not."