Part 24
Zander was bailed out right away. He and Alexis walked out. He was almost happy. He remembered how long he'd been stuck in the jail before.
"I thought you were staying out of trouble, Smith," Taggart said, in the provoking sort of tone he always used. "But we never go too long without getting to see your face."
"This is nothing," Zander said. "My girlfriend's old boyfriend and he's full of it. He's the complainant, isn't he? Sean Monroe."
Taggart put on his most sarcastic grin. "So the complainant is full of it. What else is new?"
"This complainant is," Alexis said, taking Zander's arm. "He's a lawyer."
Taggart grinned. "I guess I'll have to accept that, then," he said. "Congratulations, Smith."
Ursula Wentworth had been on the bench of the Court of Common Pleas for about three months. After 15 years of practicing law, she had always thought that the judge had it easy, but had learned in these three months that it wasn't as simple as it looked.
Dara Jenson was the prosecutor today. She was always efficient. Ursula called the first ten cases. As usual, about fifty percent of the defendants weren't there. She put them on second call. They disposed of four others by a plea, and the fifth was put off so counsel could talk to the defendant about something.
The eleventh case was that of Miss Emily Quartermaine, who was pleading to reckless driving. There was Bernard Bach, who was from the biggest firm and town and therefore had to put on a show for his client, trying to pretend that she, the judge, deferred to guys like him when they deigned to show up in the courtroom.
"Your honor," he said, with false obsequiousness. "This is a case involving an auto accident. A minor auto accident, in which only Miss Quartermaine was injured."
"Yes," she said, since she had to say something, or he would extned his dramatic pause forever. Since they had reached a plea agreement, he had no reason to argue the case, as in "only Miss Quartermaine was injured."
But of course he must run his mouth to some length, or his client would think he hadn't done anything to earn his fee.
Finally his show was over, and Ursula was able to sentence Miss Quartermaine as agreed, to forty hours of community service, to be served somewhere other than at the hospital. Whatever the reason was for that, it was no worry to Ursula. They had agreed, that wrapped up the case, and that was good enough.
Miss Quartermaine sat down again, and didn't leave right away, which was different. Most defendants hauled out as fast as they could once they were through.
Three more defendants not in yet; three more pleas. The eighteenth case was that of Alexander Kanishchev, aka Zander Smith. Ursula remembered Zander Smith for his past troubles with the law, and sighed to think that now he added to his offenses against society by having a duplicate name.
Alexis Davis represented him as usual. Part of his fame arose out of his being rather cute. The girls who worked in the courthouse joked about how they too would have tried to spring him from jail, whatever he'd done. Then she remembered the Quartermaine girl, and wondered if the one who had pled to reckless driving was the same one.
The alleged victim usually didn't appear at arraignments, but this one, a Sean Monroe, stood there beside Ms. Jenson, as though it were an important hearing. Ursula saw the defendant get up, and it was no surprise that there was a girl who had come with him, sitting next to him.
Ms. Jenson explained that the defendant was charged with third degree assault. Though a misdemeanor well, at least Smith had gone down to misdemeanors, it meant there was at least a minor injury. No injury was Offensive Touching, and major injury was first or second degree assault. Ms. Jenson claimed to have photos of the victim's injuries. The defendant had allegedly punched the victim in the jaw.
Ursula noticed that the victim was taller and bigger than the defendant. Interesting how, if he'd stayed home and waited to appear at the trial, where he would have been sitting down most of the time, he'd be a more sympathetic figure right now.
The defendant looked smaller, but solid, and he was known for his recklessness. Ursula didn't think it was impossible he would attack someone bigger than he was under the right provocation.
Ms. Davis explained that her client had punched the alleged victim, but that the alleged victim wasn't injured. Therefore her client was guilty only of Offensive Touching.
"Did you punch him?" Ursula asked the defendant.
"Yes," said the defendant.
"Twice," said the alleged victim.
"Be quiet, Mr. Monroe," Ursula said. Ms. Jenson nudged Mr. Monroe and told him to be quiet, too.
"Why did you punch him?" Ursula asked.
"He was going on about my girlfriend, your honor, he used to date her, he was claiming she kissed him. He had just assaulted her."
"Did you see that?"
"No."
"Then how do you know?"
"She told me about it later."
"So you didn't know about it at the time?"
"Only from him."
Ursula looked at the alleged victim. "Mr. Monroe?"
"Well," said Mr. Monroe. "That doesn't give him a right to punch me."
He was right. "Mr. Kash - how do you pronounce it?"
"Smith," he said.
Ursula felt her mouth curve a little. You weren't supposed to laugh. Violating the law was serious.
"You can use that if it's easier, your honor," the defendant said. "If you want to use the real one, it's not as hard as it looks. Think of Khrushchev."
An image of Nikita Khrushchev arose in Ursula's mind. In black and white. With President John F. Kennedy. She had to try not to laugh again. She could see Ms. Davis was struggling with the same thing.
"Mr. Kanishchev," Ursula said, hitting it right, with that advice, "you can't physically assault people based on their words. It's a line in the sand, of our society. You can only fight back with more words. The first one to get physical is the initiator, in the law."
"I understand," he said. "I'm sorry. I'll try harder next time. I have to avoid him. He really is the most annoying person on earth."
Ursula knew she shouldn't be swayed by how adorable he was. He probably meant what he was saying now, but it didn't mean he'd remember it back out in the world. Again she struggled not to laugh.
"Mr. Monroe," she said, to distract herself. "You may be technically in the right, but then you don't have to say everything that occurs to you. You know you can't tease another man about his girlfriend, and you're going to be a victim many times if you don't learn to hold your tongue."
"OK, your honor," he said, obsequiously. Ursula instantly knew he had ambitions to be a lawyer. "I'll remember that next time."
"I hope so," Ursula said to him. "If what Mr. Kanishchev said is true, then the young lady might charge you with assault."
"She's here," Ms. Davis said.
"All right, have her come up here," Ursula said, suddenly inspired.
"What's your name?" Ursula asked her when she had come in through the gate. She was a petite girl, very pretty, with long blonde hair. She stood next to the defendant, between him and Ms. Davis.
"Quinn Connor," she said.
"What happened?"
"I was going to Kelly's, when I saw Mr. Monroe. We dated four years in college, not here, but out at Notre Dame. He's from Kentucky. It was at least a couple of years since I had seen him. Suddenly he showed up here, and said he was going to take the bar exam for New York. Suddenly he's dating my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend. Then that day, I ran into him on the docks, and he grabbed me and kissed me. I struggled to get away from him. He was teasing me and picking me up. I got away. Later I talked to Zander and found out that this incident between the two of them was right after that."
She spoke sensibly, without getting too angry or excited, but enough to show she found the alleged victim to be very annoying. It was clear to Ursula that she adored the defendant.
She struck Ursula as a sensible person, and easily the most credible of the three of them.
"Before he came along," she added, indicating the alleged victim, "his alleged girlfriend Miss Quartermaine threw a cup of iced tea at me, which I understand is an Offensive Touching."
"Miss Quartermaine?" Ursula said.
"She's here," Mr. Monroe said.
It was the same girl who had just pled to reckless driving. "All right, bring her up," Ursula said. "Yes, you. You can come up here, too."
Miss Quartermaine looked offended that she should be dragged into this lurid proceeding.
"Look," Urusla said, trying to adopt a lecturing tone. "All four of you have to live in this town without disturbing its peace. One, you can avoid each other, but to the extent you can't, you have to learn to get along without coming to blows. For that you are wrong, Mr. Kanishchev, but I will give you one more chance. I am going to send this case to arbitration, where you can come to a settlement which, if you can abide by it, will result in this charge being dropped. Do you understand?"
"Yes," the defendant said. "Thank you, your honor."
"All right," Ursula said. "This court is in recess for a ten minute break." Then she went off the bench and into her office, where she could have a good laugh without disturbing the dignity of the law.