You Know What Grinds My Gears?

by UltimateWarriorFan4Ever

Peter Griffin brings back the famous topic which is on his mind! With all the problems facing the world today, Peter sends out his opinions on the things that really grinds his gears! If there's a topic you want Peter to cover, let him know! These opinions are strictly Peter's, not mine. Just to let you know. Chapter 219 is up!

92. Peter on Santa Claus

"You Know What Grinds My Gears?"

Rated T

Disclaimer: I don't own anything associated with Family Guy or any of the characters. Family Guy and the characters are owned by FOX and the creator, Seth McFarlane. Anyway, I was inspired by one of the episodes of Family Guy, and I suggested that I do a fic based on the segment that Peter Griffin did called 'You Know What Grinds My Gears'? Enjoy!

---

Chapter 92: Peter on Santa Claus

---

"You know what really grinds my gears? Santa Claus. What else can I say about this jolly red giant? He's round, he's big, he's giant, he's fat, he's diabetic, he's a lardass, and he smells just like Rudolph's reindeer-sized s**t. What's worse about Santa Claus is the fact that he doesn't exist. I used to think at 7 years old that he was real and all, but I found out it was my drunken uncle Elliott with a white beard. And he was wearing a red shirt with a red hat on top. How dare you fool me like that, Santa Claus. If that is, if you do exist. And that's why Santa Claus, real or not, grinds my gears."

---

Wow, Peter's definitely getting coal for Christmas for sure.

Anyway, you got more topics for the big guy himself? You know what to do here! :D