Hey!So Ducky decided to be nice and instead of start her homework and confirm some plans with her parents, she would post a new chapter for you! So, sing a song, dance around, do whatever you do to celebrate and get happy! Come on! Don't leave the Ducky alone! Ok, soI'm done my presentations that were bugging me earlier, so I'm feeling a bit less stressed, and I would like to say thank you to Robin and all of my wonderful reviewers! You guys make this story what it is, andI think that there is nothing nicer and kinder than giving a review to a Duck who has to go to school. Who agrees? And I would like to state that I was going to only post about two thirds of this, but I thought that you might like it if I posted more. I will be done with school in about two weeks, and then I'm spending a week in Maine, and then, I'll be back to write as much as I can and post as fast as I can! And this, my friends, is why we celebrate summer! So now I know you all want to get to the story, so here you go!

Disclaimer:Bite me.

Chapter 4: Lick the Pain Away

She felt something licking her. She thought that maybe last night was a dream; maybe last night had all just been an imagined worst case scenario. Maybe this was Luke waking her up, wait, Luke didn't lick. Luke would kiss her when he was there, not lick.

She opened her eyes to see Paul Anka staring at her. She quickly sat up and then it hit her: last night was not a dream. It was all real, and hell was a reality.

She lightly pushed Paul Anka away and pulled the covers away from herself. She didn't want to get up, but this time, she had to face the world and at least pretend she was ok. As much as she didn't care what other people said, she knew it would be easier if she just tried to burry herself in her work.

She lifted herself out of bed, and headed towards the bathroom. She stripped herself of her clothes as she entered the bathroom, and looked in the mirror. She saw the disgusting skinny figure in the mirror. She hadn't been eating well lately due to the fact that she didn't really want to. What was the point? So now she was left with the body that was ten or fifteen pounds less than her own. Her face was covered in dried, smudged makeup, while her feet and legs were covered in dirt from the bridge. Her hair was in knots and oily. She felt so numb inside but forced herself to get ready for work. She slowly got into the shower. She turned on the water, which was cold. She didn't even change the temperature; the cold might be the only thing she could feel at that moment, so she wanted to preserve that.

She could feel the disgusting dirt and filth wash away from her body. She saw the black and brown tinted stream of water go down the drain as she pulled the soap to her body. She felt the bubbles tingle on her skin as the shampoo (which she didn't remember putting in her hair) was rinsed from her hair. All of this seemed like slow motion, but in reality, only took about ten minutes. She looked down at her now pale skin. Her body looked like a ghost; maybe this was why Luke didn't want to marry her. Maybe he thought she was just some pasty looking skinny girl who wasn't worthy of spending the rest of her life with him. Maybe he saw the disgusting eating habits and odd sense of style. Maybe he saw it all and had deemed it unworthy of his life.

She felt the warm tears fall from her face, onto her breast and down her abdomen. She hadn't noticed she had been crying throughout the shower until now when she could feel the warmth of the salty tears streaming from her eyes onto the rest of her skin.

She quickly grabbed the towel and tried to push this feeling from her body. She wanted to feel numb again. She wanted to be able to walk through life as a zombie. She wanted to be able to forget everything including Rory, Sookie, and her dream of more children which was gone anyways.

She wrapped the towel around herself and semi-dried herself off. She then walked to the bedroom to find clothes for work. She picked out a quick dress and some underwear. She slipped the clothes on and put her half soaked hair up in a pony tail. She grabbed a light sweater, and went downstairs to get her keys and purse.

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Luke didn't know what he was doing. He packed a few things and went to go get April. She had been doing her homework outside because she claimed "fresh air stimulates the brain".

"April!" Luke shouted from the stairs. The spring breeze carrying the sound out the door to April's ears.

"Yeah?" she yelled back.

"Time to go!" he yelled, carrying his and April's bags down the stairs.

"ok." she said, gathering her things up and putting them back into her binder. "so where are we going, again?" April asked.

"We're going to a camping spot that me and my family used to go when I was younger." he told her as he threw the bags in the back of the truck. April jumped in the passenger's side of the truck while Luke went to the opposite side.

"So how far away is it?" April asked.

"Uh…about 30 minutes away, but I have to stop in Litchfield to pick some things up from the store." he added.

"Ok." April said as she pulled out a book.

"What're you reading?" Luke asked.

"Much Ado About Nothing." she answered.

"What?" Luke questioned.

"Shakespeare." she elaborated.

"Oh." Luke said, not knowing how he should respond to his daughter reading something contain words he had no idea had ever existed. He decided to let the conversation go and drove off.

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"Lorelai, are you ok?" Sookie asked.

Lorelai didn't hear her and kept staring out the kitchen window.

"Lorelai? Lorelai did you hear me?" she asked, shouting now. Lorelai jumped and dropped the glass of water in her hand.

"Oh! What?" she asked.

"I asked if you're ok." Sookie said with a concerned look on her face.

"Uh, yeah. Peachy. And you?" she said, trying to change he subject.

"You are not fine." her friend told her. "What's wrong?" she asked suspiciously.

"I have no clue what you're talking about." Lorelai told her as she tried to clean up the glass that was now all over the floor.

"Yes you do, now what's wrong?" she asked again.

"Lorelai, someone is on the phone for you." Michel interrupted.

"Oh, ok. Be there in two seconds." Lorelai said, lifting herself off the floor and walking out to the front desk. Sookie decided to follow her.

"Lorelai, you didn't answer my question." Sookie said.

"Well I don't have time." Lorelai replied, trying to get Sookie to leave her alone. How was she supposed to forget it all if all people wanted to do was get her to remember it?

"Lorelai--" Sookie started. Lorelai held up her hand as if to say 'I'm busy, be quiet'.

"Hello, dragonfly inn." Lorelai answered the phone.

"Oh, hey jess." she said. "Oh, ok, yep, that's fine. I can fit you in another day. Ok, well I'm looking forward to seeing you. Ok, bye." she said as she finished the conversation.

"Lorelai--" Sookie tried again.

"Oh crap." Lorelai said, looking at the clock. "I have a meeting with the bank in Litchfield in twenty minutes. I have to go. Michel, cover for me." Lorelai said as she rushed out the door. Avoiding Sookie would be harder than she thought.

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Lorelai had made it there in less than ten minutes and decided to stop at one of the gas stations quickly to get a snack. She pulled into one of the two parking spaces next to a green truck that looked like Luke's, but what would he be doing here? Wasn't he going camping with April? Oh wait, there was April. Lorelai saw the 13 year old sitting in the passenger's seat, reading some book. The sight reminded her of Rory when she was April's age, actually, it reminded her of Rory when she was any age.

She decided to go inside in spite of the fact that Luke was probably in there. She walked up to the door, opened it up, and went inside. She immediately saw Luke getting a bottle of water. He had his back turned to her, so she quickly ducked behind the closest isle to her. She found herself right in front of the chips, so she just grabbed a bag, making sure that Luke, who looked like he was heading to the door, didn't see her. She started walking quickly down the isle when she heard someone call her name.

"Lorelai?" it was Luke. I guess he wasn't leaving. She thought.

"Luke." Lorelai said when she turned around.

"What…what are you doing here?" he asked her.

"I have a meeting here at the bank. What about you?" she asked, wanting to just get out of there. She was having flashbacks of last night, and this morning, looking in the mirror. This was all her fault but she didn't want to have to think about it.

"We had to get gas, I wanted a bottle of water and April wanted some chips." he answered truthfully.

"You let her eat that stuff?" Lorelai said.

"Well, she doesn't get it that often, so, I think its ok." he said, getting defensive.

"not that I don't agree, I mean…I eat junk food all the time, it's just, you always tell me that it's bad, and you try and get me to stop, and well I didn't think that you would want our…I mean, I didn't think that you would want your kid eating it either." she rambled, catching herself before she mentioned what neither wanted to hear. Luke didn't know how to respond. He noticed when Lorelai was about to mention "the kids" but he tried to forget it.

"Well, I gotta…" Lorelai started. She pointed to the food behind her. "I better get my stuff and head to the meeting." she said as she started to walk backwards slowly.

"Uh…ok, bye." Luke said as she disappeared behind the end of the isle.

Luke went up and paid for his food, and went back out to the truck.

"here." he said, handing April her chips.

"thanks." she said, opening the bag up. "I saw Lorelai, was she coming? Was she supposed to meet us here?" April probed.

"Uh…no. It was just an accident." he said, the memory of the previous night, still in his mind.

"Da…I mean Luke?" April started. She caught herself before calling him dad. She didn't know if she was allowed to, but over the past few months, Luke had become a dad to her and she now realized that it was not his fault that he couldn't be in her life until now--it was her mother's.

Luke noticed the almost slip that April made. He had never heard her call him dad or even part of the word, but it caught him off guard.

"Yeah?" was all he could say.

"What happened between you two last night?" she said.

"what do you mean?" he asked, trying to pretend he had no idea what she was talking about.

"Luke, I was there last night. I'm not stupid. I heard Lorelai talking about my mother." she said. Luke hesitated, but decided to answer honestly.

"She wanted me to…she wanted me to get married right away, wanted me to stop waiting." he said.

"Waiting?" April asked.

"I, uh…after I found out that you were my daughter, I waited two months to tell her about you, and then we postponed the wedding, but she thinks we've been waiting too long." he answered sadly, but honestly.

"So why don't you? Why don't you get married?" April asked.

"It's not that easy." Luke said.

"Yes it is, Luke. You were going to get married before she found out I was your daughter, right?" she asked.

"Yes." Luke asked, not liking where this was going.

"Well then why is it so horrible that she wants to get married now? If you already were going to get married and you already had it planned before, so why can't you get married now." even though April was 13, she did have a point, and she reminded him of a younger Rory.

"It's just complicated." was his only response.

"Which is code for 'let me handle this on my own' isn't it?" April asked, getting how he still considered her a small child who didn't need to be troubled with the Big People problems of the world.

"Yep." Luke sighed.

"Ok, guess its back to Shakespeare." April said and went back to her reading.

Just then Lorelai came out of the store. Luke was just pulling out of the parking lot, so he didn't notice as a tear streamed down her face. I guess I can't forget all the time. She thought to herself.

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Lorelai had gotten back from her meeting after an hour of debating a few charges that were probably made by Michel (his suits) to the Inn. She was now in her office dealing with some paper work that had been left over from the few nights ago when this thing with Luke had started.

Just then someone knocked on the door.

"Come in." Lorelai sighed.

"Lorelai." Sookie said as she walked in.

"What is it Sookie?" Lorelai asked, obviously tired.

"Lorelai, what's been going on?" she asked.

"Sookie, not now. I'm in the middle of paper work." she said as she looked back down and went back to her work.

"Lorelai, this can't wait. You've been distracted all morning, and normally at least you are explaining how much you wish you were getting married. Now you're just silent. What's happened?" Sookie asked, truly concerned about her friend.

"Sookie! I have it under control!" Lorelai yelled at her best friend. Her friend who she had known for over 15 years. Her friend who she had seen have her first child. Her friend who was always there when Lorelai was having relationship problems. Her friend that she had just yelled at.

"Well…obviously you don't." Sookie said. She was upset and hurt by the fact that Lorelai had just yelled at her. She was almost crying even. "I mean, if you're yelling at your best friend, then I don't think you do have it all under control." Sookie said. Lorelai could tell how much she had hurt Sookie.

"Sookie…I'm sorry." Lorelai said. She got up and went and gave Sookie a hug. "I've just been having some issues with Luke. It'll be fine." she lied to her best friend. She lied to her best friend while trying to comfort her. What kind of friend did that make her?

"You sure you two are fine?" Sookie asked.

"at this moment, I don't know, but we will be." she felt like she was lying to her best friend just to protect her like Lorelai had tried to protect Rory all those years and like how Anna was trying to protect April.

"So it's going to be all right?" Sookie asked.

"It'll be fine." lying through my teeth.

"Ok. Well, I'm just going to go then, maybe cook something. Because that's what I do. I cook. Food. I cook food. Good food. And I'm gonna go now." Sookie said and then left quickly, her happy bubbly self back.

"Well that was nice." Lorelai said. She needed to stop lying to her friends and family. But that's all she had ever known.

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So, be nice to Ducky now, don't make me tell you annoying stories that shall bore you out of your mind. I will if you don't review...just kidding, but really, if you don't review, I'll send the penguins after you...Je faisais une blague!...no, but seriously, I'll never talk to you again if you don't review...ok, it really is just a joke. So PLEASE review, I stress the please, because demanding gets you no where in life...unless you have lots and lots of money...and in that case, demand away! OH! Best quote of the week! "Neil, you're my visual pleasure." So what do you think of the quote? Tell me in your review because I know you ALL are going to send one, right?