"Wake up sleepyhead," Regina said shaking her wife.
"More sleep," Emma mumbled into her pillow.
Regina shook her head at the reaction.
"Perhaps you would like me to tell your parents that the reason you aren't at breakfast with us is that you decided to play cards late into the night with some of the guards, including some that accompanied them," Regina said trying again to get Emma to get out of bed.
"Not fair," Emma said, her voice barely audible as she remained with her face snuggled against the pillow.
"You wouldn't relegate me to having breakfast alone with both of our parents would you?" Regina asked.
Emma rolled over and looked at her. "I might, but then again if I had a good morning kiss then I might be persuaded to go."
Regina bent down and gave her a quick kiss on the lips and then dodged out of the way when Emma tried to grab her. "You have your kiss now get up."
"Fine," Emma said at least sitting up in bed. "But no mentioning to my parents that I was up playing cards. Do you know how many times I got a stern lecture about that not being something a princess does?"
"It's not a proper activity for a queen either," Regina said.
"Maybe not, but it was fun," Emma said getting out of bed and stretching. "I wouldn't have left you to suffer through breakfast with all the parents either, just so you know. Besides, I know how important the next few days are going to be for you and I want to be right there by your side for it."
The festival wouldn't kick off for two more days, but their parents both got in the night before late. Regina had thought it odd that they both arrived at the same time and used the same gate despite their kingdoms being on opposite sides of the castle. It was so late they didn't speak much to their parents, merely greeted them and made sure they were shown to their rooms before retiring to their chambers—where Emma left an hour later to play cards.
This would be their first meal with all of them since their wedding which was now only days away from their first anniversary. They had all wanted to come a couple of days early to help out with any last-minute arrangements and to spend time with their daughters.
Regina hadn't been face-to-face with her mother for a year and she found she was nervous at the prospect. While they had continued to write to each other (her mother more so than her), Regina kept to practical matters once she was sure her mother would not be changing her stance toward her magic. Still, Regina was polite in her letters and had not sought out any fights or disagreements with her mother.
Today would be the day all the performers should be here – many of them having arrived already – so it was Regina's first chance to see one of the magicians.
She approached her wife and wrapped her arms around her, giving her a deeper kiss this time.
"Thank you," she said. "In case I forget to say it during the chaos of the next few days; thank you for this idea, for doing this and being the first person in my life who truly ever listened to me."
"We sure have come a long way in a year," Emma said.
"Yes, we have. Just think how far along we would be if you hadn't spent all those years ignoring me."
Regina moved dodged another effort of Emma's to grab her for her remark. She smiled at her wife. "Now hurry up and get dressed so we can have breakfast."
She retired to the other room to wait on Emma. She didn't sit down, finding she was a little on edge and had been. She hadn't slept well last night – having been awake when Emma had come into bed, although she pretended to Emma that she had just woken up when she heard Emma enter.
The truth was this whole thing had her worried. Now knowing the steps her parents probably took while she was growing up to keep her from being around magic she didn't believe this would be easy in any way. First of all, she had no idea how to tell if any of these magicians were someone who could teach her anything. It was not as if she could merely ask them outright.
And then there was the situation of actually having her parents here.
Her real concern though was not her parents or whether or not these magicians were real. No, her concern was her magic, which seemed to be flaring up more and more lately. She looked down at her hand and concentrated – pouring some of that anxiety into the magic that she could feel humming under the surface of her skin.
Nothing happened.
She wasn't surprised.
She still couldn't figure out what triggered it. The other day she had been able to form a fireball in her hand and hold it for several minutes before it disappeared. She had been trying to give more thought to how the magic might work. At first, she thought it might be a matter of concentration, but that didn't appear to be it – or at least not all of it.
It was probably foolish of her to even be trying to do magic, but as she tried to explain to Emma she almost felt this compulsion to do it. Compulsion was a poor choice of words she realized as soon as she said it and Emma had given her a concerned look. She couldn't quite find the right words though. Doing magic she tried to explain was almost like burning off energy. That explanation Emma seemed to understand a little better; the idea that she was conscious of the magic inside of her but once she used it that feeling seemed to lessen – and she liked that feeling of not feeling it constantly humming at her.
It made her feel less afraid of it, she admitted.
It still surprised her how much she confided in Emma. Now that the barrier between them had broken down they found they were at ease with each other's company even when they weren't talking. Some evenings Regina might be reading on the couch and Emma might come in sit down and prop Regina's legs up on her lap and they would sit there in silence. Of course, Emma's patience for doing nothing didn't last too long but Regina appreciated those serene moments.
There was one barrier they had not crossed yet – consummating their marriage. There had been kisses – lots of kisses – and some touching, but they hadn't fully engaged in their marital status. Regina was almost more nervous about that than she was about her magic and for much the same reason – it was completely unknown to her. Having never had sex before she wasn't sure what to expect or what to do. She knew Emma was also a virgin. Emma had told her so, but before they even married there was the expectation they would both be virginal brides.
What little touching they had done felt good to Regina and she did find Emma to be attractive, but she felt like that next step would be a big step. Emma had tried to bring the subject up several weeks ago, but Regina had quickly changed the subject. She wasn't sure she could talk about it and that perhaps when it happened it might be best if it happened without dialogue about it.
The fact that it would probably happen sooner rather than later had been on her mind for days now. She figured it was because of their anniversary. They had come a long way in that time and Regina thought it was almost laughable to think how they were in those first months – not sleeping in the same bed, barely talking, and frankly living under the belief that it would be that way forever because neither of them would ever feel married to the other.
Now their mornings were waking up next to each other, kisses – usually in private although Emma's enthusiasm had included a few more public displays – and they even managed to change clothes and bathe in the same room at the same time on occasion.
"You seem lost in thought."
Regina turned to see Emma coming out of the bedroom fully dressed to start the day.
"I guess I was," she said. "I was thinking about this last year and how things have changed for us."
"I hope you were thinking they had changed for the better."
"As a matter of fact, I was," Regina smiled.
"Good," Emma said kissing her on the cheek. "Now shall we go face the parents?"
…
Emma preferred it when she and Regina dined alone. When they did, they usually sat next to each other, but with their parents here, which required more of a formal table setting, they were on opposite ends of the table facing each other with their parents to each side of them.
Their parents were waiting for them outside the dining chamber when they came downstairs and before they separated to go to each end of the table, Emma grabbed Regina's hand and gave it a little squeeze. She knew her wife well enough now to know when she was nervous about something, and she could feel the anxiety increase the closer they got to this festival. She knew – or at least she was mostly convinced – that the anxiety had nothing to do with their actual anniversary and everything to do with her mother being here and the prospect of finally meeting someone who knew magic.
She hoped one of the four magicians who had been invited to perform would know magic and could teach Regina. It would mean the world to her wife and she knew there could be no greater anniversary gift she could give her.
She was sitting there now watching Regina as she conversed politely with both sets of parents, although she noticed that Regina still regarded her mother more coolly than she did her father. Emma still didn't understand how they could treat Regina as they had – denying her the knowledge of magic when it wasn't as if Regina asked to have this power, she was born with it. Emma resented both of Regina's parents for it equally even if Regina seemed to resent her mother more so.
It was hard not to just ask them what exactly their problem was and how they could spend years keeping Regina away from magic while also making Regina feel bad for having it. That was Emma's real problem with all of this. Through all the years of telling Regina she needed to ignore it and that it was dangerous they had managed to create this anxiety in their daughter that if the magic was bad then there must be something bad about Regina for having it. Regina hadn't exactly said that to Emma but that is how Emma saw it.
She couldn't imagine her parents ever doing such a thing, and she knew that if she ever became a mother she would never treat her child like that either.
Throughout the meal, their parents would ask questions about the festival or the kingdom in general and both she and Regina would answer – showing a united front. This wasn't just about their anniversary or the festival, but also showing their parents that they had this all under control and their stewardship was no longer needed.
"Tell me, have you two vetted the performers yet to make sure they aren't going to do anything that would be inappropriate," Cora said.
"We sent out advisers who met with them or attended a performance before we extended an invitation for them to perform here," Emma said.
"But neither of you have personally met with them."
"Not beyond ones we already knew because they performed in one of your kingdoms previously," Regina said.
"It's actually on today's itinerary," Emma added. "While Regina is out making sure the facilities – like the stages and performance areas are ready – I was going to be meeting with some of the performers to check them out. I am the one who handled all the invites and sending out advisers to those who answered our call for performers. Frankly, that part of it interests me more than all the hundreds of other items that Regina has handled."
"Is it that you aren't interested in the performers?" Snow asked turning to Regina.
It was an odd question, Emma thought and she saw Regina look at her as if to ask 'why is your mother asking me this?'
"I trust Emma's judgment in this and given all the other logistics of putting on an event like this I am grateful she volunteered to handle it all. It's not that I am not interested as Emma and I plan on attending several of the performances, but I feel like she is more than capable of handling that part of it," Regina said. "The important thing is for the people to have fun and enjoy the next couple of days."
"Have you decided on what performances you will be attending yet?" Snow asked.
"Does it matter?" Emma asked. She wasn't sure why her mother was asking this.
"Not overly so," Snow said. "It was more of a personal question so that your father and I get the chance to spend time with you and we would like to spend time with Regina too and get to know her better. If there are opportunities where you wouldn't mind us attending a performance with you, we would like to plan for it."
"That sounds like a wonderful idea," Regina said. "We have a schedule of performances and we have a draft schedule of when we would be attending events –trying to even things out so the people see us out together or separately at a variety of events – perhaps we could sit down this afternoon or after dinner and formalize it so you could see what events you would also like to attend."
"We would like that," Snow said. "If you don't mind I would be more than happy to go with your while you inspect the performance areas."
"You are more than welcome to do so," Regina responded. "Emma tells me you have planned many of these festivals yourself so I am sure you have insights into things I haven't thought of."
"I have found over the years that you can't plan out everything, but every year you seem to come up with some new idea to make improvements," Snow said.
"Then it's settled, after the meal, we shall go out."
"And if you don't mind Emma, I would love to accompany you while you meet with the performers," Cora said.
Emma resisted the urge to look at Regina at that moment. "Yeah, that would be great," Emma replied. Suddenly this all felt a little less innocent to her. She remembered Regina commenting the night before about their parents arriving at the same time and coming through the same gate, but she had shrugged it off, but now she was beginning to wonder if there wasn't something going on here.
Their parents had spent years pushing her and Regina together that neither of them had spent one-on-one time with the other's parents. Now this was beginning to feel a little more coordinated on the part of their mothers at least.
After breakfast, Regina excused herself to go back to the chambers and told Snow she would meet her to go out on their inspections in half an hour. Emma also excused herself when she saw Regina's look.
Once they were in the privacy of their room, Regina already pacing when she got there, Emma forced her to stop.
"Ok so I am not the only one who thinks this is a little weird," Emma said.
"You must be careful about what you say around my mother," Regina said.
"You don't think this has anything to do with us bringing magicians here do you?"
"After the lengths my parents went to as I growing up, yes I could see that."
"But my parents don't know anything about it and it was my mom's idea to buddy up with you first."
Regina paused, biting her bottom lip and then sighing. "You are right, it was your mom's suggestion first and one thing I think we can be certain of is that your parents have no idea about this issue with my magic. There is no way my parents would have told them seeing as they have kept it a secret and have barely spoken to me about it in all these years. It seems a little out of the blue for our mothers to suddenly want to spend time with us in this way."
Emma shrugged, "At least you have spoken to my mother before; I have rarely exchanged words with yours."
"Maybe this is some sort of test," Regina said. "You know to see if we are getting along and that we can handle ruling our kingdom without supervision."
"Don't you think that your father would be involved in that? He and my mom are the ones who hold the stewardship."
"I don't know. I guess all we can do is just go about the business of the day like we had planned and then meet back here and compare notes to see if we can figure out if there is a reason behind this."
"Sounds good," Emma said. "And don't worry, I will be careful around your mother and will try not to let something slip like how you practically tear my clothes off each night in bed."
Regina swatted at her wife and missed. She was relieved Emma could joke because it put her a little at ease, although the level of anxiety she was still feeling was high.
…
Many of the performers had arrived the day before and were staying in the local inns. They came in early to inspect performance areas and meet with people from the kingdom who would be helping manage the dozens of shows.
They had set up a practice area and that is where Emma now sat with Cora. The two women had exchanged pleasantries on the way there, but it was nothing more than surface talk.
They were currently listening to a minstrel perform and Emma glanced over at Cora who was watching with the same kind of discerning look she often saw on Regina's face. Cora turned and caught her studying her.
"Is there something wrong?" Cora asked.
"No, I was just thinking that the look you had a moment ago, it reminded me of Regina. When she is focusing on something, it was like that."
Cora smiled at her. "I will take that as a compliment."
The minstrel finished up and in the gap between the next performer, Cora spoke again. "How has my daughter been?"
"Good. She's been good."
"Happy?"
"Yeah, she's happy," Emma said, unable to hide the smile on her face.
Cora again smiled at her. "You don't know what it means to me to hear you say that. I only want for Regina to be happy."
Emma couldn't help but be a little skeptical about that statement. After all, how could you hope for your daughter's happiness while denying her the chance at the one thing she truly wanted – to learn of her magic. It wasn't easy for Emma to sit there and not feel some resentment toward this woman. She understood now why Regina acted so coolly toward her mother.
"Did you get Regina a present for your anniversary?" Cora asked when Emma said nothing.
"Of course," Emma said. Regina had tried to make her promise not to get her a gift because she considered this festival and the chance to meet an actual magician as her gift, but Emma argued that it would only be right that if she was getting a gift that Regina should get one. Regina took the opportunity to say "oh, so you think I am getting you a gift." Emma knew she was only joking because Regina gave her one of those smiles again.
"What did you get her?"
"It's kind of private."
"Say no more. I understand," Cora said.
The next performer began to set up and Emma saw it was one of the magicians. Her heartbeat increased significantly. She needed to study this guy and report everything back to Regina. They had agreed it was probably too risky with her parents being there for Regina to be the one to inspect the magicians. Besides as Regina pointed out, Emma knew as much about magic as she did so she wasn't sure it mattered which one of them did it.
She stole another glance at Cora who was watching the man intently for a moment and then she saw a slight smile on her face and she wondered what that was for. Emma turned back to the man and watched him throughout his mini-show. When it was done she clapped politely as did Cora. The show was good, but Emma wasn't sure that anything the guy did was anything more than a trick and she hoped that in watching the others she would find some hopeful sign to pass on to Regina.
…
"You have done an amazing job getting all of this organized," Snow commented to Regina as they walked. They had already looked over several of the performance rings. They hadn't said much to each other beyond Snow making an occasional suggestion on ways to improve a couple of things for any future festival they might have. They were all sensible suggestions and Regina thanked her for her input.
Part of the reason she hadn't said much to Snow was that ever since they started on this little excursion she could practically feel the magic pulsing in her and she was so afraid something was going to happen. Even as she approached the wooden stages she kept as far back as she could fearful that she might set them on fire.
She didn't understand why the magic was acting like this. It was like it was practically begging for her to use it. It was almost as if she could reach for it and do anything she wished with it—and that scared her.
"Are you ok?" Snow asked.
"What? Oh yes, lost in thought I guess," Regina said.
"I am sure you have a great many things on your mind. You will find that something is always going to pop up and require your attention when you are ruling a kingdom," Snow said. "Sometimes the choices we face seem daunting. We do the best we can though, even when we are unsure we are doing the right thing."
Regina considered not only her words but the expression on her face as she said it. She could tell Snow was speaking from personal experience and she wondered what it was that Snow had found daunting.
"How do you know you are doing the right thing?" Regina asked. "In those times you are unsure."
"You won't always know immediately," Snow replied. "Your marriage for instance. After my first visit here, I had doubts that you and Emma would ever be able to make a marriage work and if your marriage wouldn't work, your kingdom would feel the effects. But seeing you two now, I must say you two have come a long way."
"But the marriage, it wasn't as if you had a choice. Yes, there was a choice but you wouldn't have let Emma die if there some way to prevent it."
"I never said thank you," Snow said. "For your willingness to go through with your nuptials after your parents chose to tell you what they did. Thank you."
"I think anyone in my position would have. What I don't understand is why Emma and I weren't introduced to each other sooner? You spring this on us when we are 16 when maybe we could have spent time together as children and gotten used to each other more. I know she and I didn't exactly try to get along once we found out we were to be married, but maybe we could have been friends at least if we had met sooner."
Snow averted her eyes from Regina, instead focusing on some workers who were putting up a railing on the stage. She thought about those years from Regina's birth until the time she was told of the marriage – she thought about the things they had discussed and even tried to prevent Regina from ever being able to cast that curse. The things Snow had at times wished would work so her daughter didn't have to marry this woman.
Thinking of it now, she could practically hear Regina's screams the dark summer night when they had tried to remove the magic from the girl who was 10 at the time. Cora had forced them to stop and held the sobbing girl in her arms.
Regina would not remember this as her memory had been wiped and Snow wished it was something she too could erase from her memory.
She felt shame wash over her now that she knew Regina better.
"You and Emma met as kids," Snow said finally turning back to her. "You were too young probably to remember most of those times. The first time you were about 14 or 15 months old I think when we came to visit your parents' kingdom and brought Emma with us. I remember the whole carriage ride there Emma was being so fussy. It was the first long trip we had taken her on and she just wouldn't settle down. I tried everything and she would only cry and cry. We get there and your father apologizes to us for your mother's absence in greeting us because she was in the nursery with you where you too were giving your mother a hard time. I wanted to lay Emma down to see if she would take a nap and so I was escorted upstairs and we were nearing your nursery and I heard you crying and Emma was crying and instead of going straight to our rooms, I stopped there at the nursery. I entered and it was like as soon as I did, you were standing up in your crib holding onto the railing wailing until I brought Emma in and you calmed down. Cora looked back at me and Emma and then at you and the strange thing was, Emma too stopped crying. We ended up bringing the bassinet that had been placed in our rooms over to the nursery and set it up next to your crib and you and Emma both took naps."
At the time it happened, Snow and Cora had been bewildered as to why their girls had suddenly calmed down in each other's presence. It wasn't the last time either that it seemed the girls had some sort of undefinable connection.
"At least as babies we got along," Regina commented.
"Yes, you did," Snow said. "Are there things I wish could have gone differently for you and Emma, of course, I do? Your parents and Charming and I were faced with a difficult situation and while we didn't handle it perfectly, I am pleased to see you and Emma together now."
"What was Emma like as a child?"
"Rambunctious. From the moment she could pull herself up and walk it was like she believed there wasn't anything out there that she couldn't do," Snow said, her lips curving up as she thought about her daughter. "She used to run around the castle saving people she thought were in distress. It was hard to get her to sit still."
"Some things haven't changed then," Regina said. "Emma still has trouble sitting still."
"Yes," Snow agreed. "We went through quite a few tutors who couldn't seem to get her to be patient enough to sit for a lesson. Don't get me wrong, my daughter is smart, but it's not necessarily an intelligence gleaned from hard study. She always wanted to follow in her father's footsteps – do whatever he was doing. I was hesitant at first with her pursuing that course of study, but it was clear that she loved it so I allowed it. Sometimes you have to put aside what you want for your children for them to have what they want."
"I suppose that depends upon the parents," Regina said, wishing her parents had been as open-minded.
Snow saw the sadness wash over Regina's features and she had to stop herself from saying something in response. Regina had no idea that others knew she had magic as those who knew were few. The heads of the kingdoms knew as did a few magic wielders, but beyond the guards that had escorted the seer into the room that day no one else knew. They had all been sworn to secrecy because if it had gotten out that Regina had the potential to cast a curse that would destroy their world her life would have been in danger.
She remembered that first trip to the Mills kingdom with Emma and the number of guards who were on duty – it was almost like they were preparing for a siege. Charming had commented to Henry about it, who had pointed out that he wasn't ready to take any chances with his daughter's safety. He made it clear that he didn't see them as a threat but he still wanted to be ready for anything just in case someone chose to break the covenant of silence they had agreed upon.
It was Snow's understanding that the number of guards around Regina at most times had continued until she became a proficient rider and then it became a lost cause.
"Come," Snow said linking her arm with Regina's. "Let's go look at the next stage and I will tell you about Emma's first birthday party."