As Emilia read what was on the book she was given with, she was not prepared to read what was written on the book's cover.
'Emilia.' She thought as she read the book's cover.
It took a second before the information sunk in.
'H-How? Didn't I go back..?' She thought. She was confused and frightened that she had this book, but if she has one, then Beatrice has one as well?
She just took a glance at the spirit who was clinging to her contractor as if he was gonna be taken away from them. She didn't bother to disturb the spirit, and instead told the three knights to go to a separate room. They'll talk about things thoroughly there.
"Felix, Julius, Reinhard, we'll talk outside." Emilia said to them, to which the knights obliged. They were ready to listen to what the half-elf candidate would say.
For Emilia, she was trying to figure out what she could say, as she remembers the Witch's punishment when she talks about her death. It annoys her that she couldn't tell anyone about anything she had experienced before.
The sunlight was now on the boy as he was showered with the sun's light and heat as he was on the yard, in his wheelchair, while Emilia and Beatrice were looking after him. It was just another peaceful day in the manion.
"Emilia-sama." Called someone, who's voice belonged to Otto.
"Oh, Otto, what brings you here?" She asks him.
"Nothing, I just wanted to check in with what's happening with Natsuki-san." Otto replied.
"Oh, I see."
"By the way, Emilia-sama." Otto called out once more.
"Hm, yes Otto?"
"Could we speak privately?" He asks as he pointed at the Spirit who was clearly talking to her unconscious contractor.
Emilia caught on with Otto's words and leaned closer to him as he whispered something to her.
"How'd you know that the Witch Cult would attack?" He asks her.
"Well, I know because I saw it before I died and-" Emilia gets cut off as everything around her has frozen. Otto, the wind, the butterflies that were flying, everything. Except for the little librarian who felt the sensation.
"What's happening I suppose?" Beatrice asks, as she looks around.
Shadows were coming from thin air. And they lurked their way nearer to them.
"What the..?" Emilia utters as she too looks around. She looked around and tried to move Subaru, but it didn't work.
Their punishment when they reveal Return by Death was different from Subaru's. Unlike him when time stops, they could move and venture around, but once the effects are gone, they are back in their previous positions before time had stopped, panting.
And so as they moved around, Beatrice sensed something was coming for them.
"Behind us I suppose!" She yelled at Emilia, as they now looked around, but it was too late.
Dark claws pierced their chest, caressing their hearts. They could feel the pain coming from the interaction.
"Shhh~" Someone cooed, it was the witch.
Both girls couldn't utter anything as they were busy getting pierced by the dark claws.
"Don't tell anyone about Return by Death~" She cooed once more.
'Wha..?' Were in the girl's thoughts as this was happening.
And then the claws tightened their grips on their hearts, crushing them. Tears came out of their eyes.
Time had begun moving again, the winds began to move and so did the butterflies. But the pain they had experienced was still with them. They panted, gasping for air, as if they were out of breath.
"Emilia-sama, what happened!?" Otto asks as he notices the sweat and tears out of Emilia's eyes as she pants, he too noticed the spirit was also affected.
"What's happening!?" Otto asks in panic, as he didn't understand what was happening.
Emilia raised her hand as she pants. "Nothing." She said as she breathed heavily, "It's nothing."
Otto was so concerned that he had rushed inside to get them water, although he didn't tell anyone else as he didn't know what to do at the time.
As he got them water, and they drank, Emilia said something to Otto.
"Looks like I'll have to answer that question some time soon, Otto." Replied Emilia, to which Otto nods in understanding.
"Alright, Emilia-sama." He said, as he walked back into the mansion, and headed back to his office.
They are fine now, but it still scares them. Both spirit and half-elf still feel this certain fear within them. Sadly for them, they couldn't speak of the truth as they were forced to keep their mouths shut.
This same exact scenario happened over, and over again. When someone in the mansion asks, it happens again. So Beatrice and Emilia came to an agreement to never tell anyone, or at least find a way to tell them without getting harmed by the witch. Sadly for them, there's no way for anyone to know. For she forbade it, she wouldn't allow them to spill the information of the power she had given them.
Back to the present, Emilia was now with the three knights who were now accompanied by Wilhelm. And here, it will be tested if Emilia would speak of the truth, or would she lie. And if she does speak of the truth, will the Witch allow her?
"So Emilia-sama, about the book…" Julius was the one to break the silence.
"..." She responded with silence as she was conflicted about answering the turned her head to the side, not facing them.
"Emilia-sama please tell us." Reinhard begged for an answer, but was once again met with silence.
'If only I could tell you.' She thought. She really wanted to tell them, but she knows, once she tells them, the Witch would intervene, reminding them to remain silent about Return by Death.
"Emilia-sama…" Felix now called out.
Emilia couldn't hold herself back anymore, she wanted to tell them about the ability she was given by the witch, but how would she phrase it?
"Do you really want to know?" Emilia asks the three knights, to which they nod. Wilhelm too was rather worried about that damned book, considering it has Emilia's name on it.
"Alright then." Emilia voiced out. "It is indeed mine." She answers the question. She closes her eyes in anticipation of the Witch's punishment. But once she opened them and took a peek, she only saw the knights, who were moving, who were trembling.
As soon as she declared that the book was hers, they were taken aback, shocked by the proclamation of the half-elf candidate. They were shaken, they were trembling at the revelation.
"I-It can't be…!" Julius yelled in disbelief.
Felix's jaw agape. He failed to protect a candidate. He couldn't believe it, but she's right there in front of him. Just how does she have one of these books with her name on it?
"H-how are you alive...Emilia-sama?" Reinhard asks.
Now Emilia was trekking through a dangerous trap. One information slip, the punishment of the Witch will befall her and Beatrice.
"It's a long story." She said as she scratched the back of her head, uttering the words shyly.
"Hm?" Wilhelm took note of Emilia's antics. She was diverting the topic, but he didn't wish to intervene. He believes that everyone has their own rights to their privacy.
But death, it was no laughing matter. It was a serious matter. If she has a book of the dead, and she's still alive, how is that possible?
'There's just too much I don't know.' Wilhelm thought.
As the knights were still trembling, Julius managed to say more of his thoughts out loud.
"S-So if it's real you have died, s-so Beatrice-sama-" He gets cut off as the spirit enters the room.
"Beatrice!" Emilia said as she turned around to see who had come in.
"It is true in fact." Beatrice said as she walked closer to them. She was done sobbing her eyes out onto her contractor's tracksuit.
"B-Beatrice-sama!" The knights said as they all bowed before the Great Spirit's presence, so did Wilhelm.
"No need for your courtesy in fact." She said, "If you're wondering if Betty too has died, Betty can confirm in fact." She said, confirming their greatest fears.
Emilia was confused why time didn't stop. Did they find a way to talk about their ability without getting punished? Or did Satella simply let them speak of it this time.
'Can I tell them about this ab-' Before she could even finish her thought, she felt pain in her chest. HEr heart was gripped again by the claws.
'DON'T THINK ABOUT IT!' Envy yelled through Emilia's thoughts. After that she gasps for air as she breathes heavily. She then observes Beatrice, she is fine. Looks like the punishment didn't affect her, only Emilia.
On the other side of things, the knight's moods had gone even deeper. They were too preoccupied by their thoughts to see the panting candidate. They felt useless. Then again, how are they alive?
"H-H-How..?" Felix stutters.
"None of your business I suppose." She said as she handed out a book whose inscription can't be read.
"W-Who's book is this, Beatrice-sama?" Reinhard stutters as he asks.
"It's my contractor's book I suppose, it's his name in his home's literature in fact." She said.
"-Ghk!" The knights were in pure shock. They had let Subaru die. Not only that, but the half-elf candidate and the great spirit of the forbidden library as well.
The knights looked at the spirit, who's aura hadn't changed.
"Before you ask anything more about how we are still here, we'll keep it a secret in fact." Beatrice said, as she shot down every opportunity for them to ask further.
And with that, the knights were rendered speechless, as they couldn't comprehend what the spirit just confirmed. They felt small, useless. They, in their minds, were failures. But then again, it raises a question, how are they alive?
Back in the Castle of Dreams, Subaru couldn't believe what they just discovered. Now in the previous loop he did see those books as he watched their adventures, but didn't not mind them. And now after an explanation from Echidna, he was left into a sweaty mess. Worried that they would find out he had that power before he had been reduced into a coma state.
"So you're telling me, those books reveal the life of the dead..?" Subaru asks, terror beginning to fill his entire being. He saw Beatrice read the cover of the book Emilia gave her.
"Yes, and after your countless deaths, you have so many within the library." Echidna confirmed. "Quite impressive actually that you have more books of the dead a person could have, honestly." She commended as she sipped her tea.
Subaru was now taken aback by this confirmation. If they read his Books of the Dead, they'll know about everything, his deaths, their deaths, and his failures.
In a lack of a better term, Subaru's mind was in shambles. Breaking at the mere thought of them finding out about Return by Death, showing his deaths by their hands, and by the hands of others.
Sure he would be relieved for someone else to know the hell he had gone through, but then knowing would be a nightmare to him. All of his efforts of making them smile, all of the efforts to give them joy would be dashed away if they knew how many times he had died just to give them that smile, that happiness, that joy.
As he was having his mental breakdown, he started to laugh, manically. His mind was collapsing onto itself. Tears started to leak out of his eyes. He was like a madman who had been freed from the sanitarium.
"No, no, no, no, no…" He starts uttering out, sparking concern from the witches, especially from Satella.
His laughter then became shouts, shouts of denial and fear. Denying the possibility they might open it. Fear of them knowing of his deaths, and his shortcomings.
"Please no, no, no no! NO!" He yelled with all of his might. The fear was too great. He had hid this from all of them, and now thanks to him teaching Beatrice to write his name in his homeworld's scriptures, Beatrice could easily tell which books are his.
"C-Calm down!" Carmilla said as Subaru began wailing like a madman.
But Subaru didn't bother to listen; he continued to wail.
"NO! NO! NO! NO!" He goes on, disregarding those around him. He was now rolling on the ground, scratching his face.
"CAN'T BE!, CAN'T BE!, CAN'T BE!" He continues on. Scratch marks are now visible on his face, blood coming out.
"Oh no you don't!" Minerva said as she began punching Subaru to full recovery.
"GET AWAY FROM ME!" He yelled as he was not having none of it, he didn't want to be healed.
"Just calm down Subarun." Daphne said, as she now used her coffin to pin him down.
"Let me go!" He yelled, trying to break free.
Carmilla then walks up to Subaru's vision, hoping she could knock him out with her Authority which renders anyone immobile when looking at her, as she tends to look like someone's significant partner in their eyes through her Authority.
"F-Forgive me Subaru, but I have to do this." She said as she stepped closer.
Subaru was still trying to break free. It is as if he was once again possessed by Petelguese.
As soon as she entered his line of sight, instead of Carmilla, he saw Emilia.
"E-Emilia-tan-" He utters before getting knocked out. This was the first time since back in the sanctuary that Carmilla's authority actually worked against him.
"Are you sure that was a safe thing to do, Milla?" Typhon asks.
"I-I hope so." Carmilla replied.
'What show of display you made, Subaru Natsuki. You really don't want them to know.' Echidna thought.
Satella was left into a sobbing mess, who was later then comforted by Minerva after she healed Subaru.
"Why?" Was all Satella could utter. She continues to sob as the other witches placed him back on his seat.
"Subaru Natsuki." Sekhmet voiced out. "You tend to *Sigh* act irrationally." She finished, rather lazy enough to give a damn about what just happened. She is the literal embodiment of sloth, what do we expect.
As this continues to play on, they forgot about the others that were making their way to the tower. The Witch Cultists that were going to harvest the boy's authority of sloth so that Petelguese will live again.
From a hundred followers that were marching through the dunes, twenty had died, and they were only halfway to the tower.
A follower then came up to the woman who was covered in bandages. He whispers something to her.
"Rest?" She asks. She then looks around, the followers growing exhausted as they walk on.
"There will be no rest, we have to fulfil this ordeal don't we?" She said to the follower, not in a commanding way, but that of a mother calmly telling her child to do their chores.
The follower continues to whisper something to her, arguing that they needed to rest to regain their strength, and so that they could cut their losses during this trip, well, they chose to march their way to the tower.
"Hm." She utters out as she takes a good look around. She sees a follower fall to the sand, face first. He was exhausted.
"Fine, but only this once." She said. Then they all halted, and took their rest.
"Even though I hate being delayed, this will be fine enough." She utters out as she looks over the horizon. She was near.
"Soon." She once again utters.
"I'll be reunited with you again."
Back to the Sage's tower, the knights were still shell shocked about the books of the dead. Surely they were hallucinating right?
As they were like this Emilia and Beatrice left them be with Wilhelm to recover their sanity after they heard that they've died. And there's another reason why they left them alone. For the little spirit found something disturbing. Something that would definitely shock and destroy Emilia's mood even further.
For what they would eventually find is something the unconscious boy only knows the truth to. Only he and he alone. This was something he wished to hide from them. He wished that they would never hear his tale of death and suffering just to see them smile. Just to save them from a fate that would take them away from him. The darkest truth he could've hidden from all of them. From Ram, Rem, Otto, Garfiel, Frederica, Petra, Roswaal, and even Emilia and Beatrice.
"Where are we going Beatrice?" Emilia asks as she was told to follow the spirit.
"You'll see soon enough I suppose." Beatrice said.
'Am I doing the right thing, I wonder?' She asks herself. This was something that disturbed her the most. Seeing this sight would destroy anyone's joy and happiness. Leaving the one to behold this sight with nothing but sadness and despair.
'I have a bad feeling about this…' Emilia thought. She did not like where this was going one bit, like she always does when the little spirit becomes serious about something.
And so they continued walking on through the hall then up the stairs up to the Taygeta Library.
"Why are we-" Emilia gets cut off as she gets pulled by the little spirit.
And they continued to walk again. They walked on, and on as the little spirit inspected the shelves they've passed by. Until the little spirit stops, then turns to the shelf to her right.
"We're here I suppose." She utters out.
"What do you mean, 'we're here'?" Emilia asks as she now looks at the shelf Beatrice was looking at.
She notices that every single book on the shelf has the same characters as the rest of the books on the same shelf.
"What is this Beatrice?" Emilia asks as she tries to read what is written on the sides of the books.
"It's his I suppose." Beatrice replied.
"Who?" Emilia asks.
"It's all of Betty's contractor's books I suppose."