Chapter 24: some randomness!
Shinji: I don't want to pilot eva anymore.
Misato: Quit your whining... Did you ever consider how LUCKY you are!
Shinji: What do you mean, my father is a bleep, and I put my life on the line all the time.
Misato: Yes, but you get to control God, you live with two HOT women, and then there's--
Shinji: There's what?
Misato:(Sexy Wink)
Shinji: (Weirded out look)
Misato: (quick flashes shinji)
Shinji: ohhhhhhhhhhh baby (sexy smile)
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Asuka: Bloody Hell! That's hot!
Rei: "Bloody Hell"? Where do you get off saying that? Are you some half-arsed Brit or something?
Asuka: Much more than you! I mean, come on, "Langley"? Besides, you're the "half-arsed Brit." You're always using your idioms and adding u's to words like "colours" and the like.
Rei: So what if I do?
Asuka: Well...nothing. Just stop being a hypocrite, allright?
Rei: I suppose I should. Thanks for pointing that out.
Asuka: Always happy to point out the flaws in others Rei: Of course Anyways, what's hot?
Asuka: Uh...well, it's hot outside, duh. That's why we have our plug-suits on.
Rei: Yes...the cooling systems are rather nice, though they don't help that much...but you said "that's hot," not "it's hot"
Asuka: So I did...my mistake...heheh.
Rei: I noticed that nervous laugh. Asuka: Really?
Rei: Yes. So, what's hot?
Asuka: Well.
Rei: There's only one thing you could be refering to!
Asuka: Heheh.
Rei: Look, that's just going too far. Asuka: I know. Totally inappropriate. Sorry. Rei: No you aren't. You're just sorry I caught you. Asuka: .
Rei: You see me like this all the time; why now?
Asuka: Must be the heat.
Rei: Asuka: It's the only thing different than usual.
Rei: Perhaps. Or perhaps it's that we aren't at work, or in mortal danger, so you had time to notice me?
Asuka: Perhaps.
Rei: That never stopped Shinji from oggling me.
Asuka: That's because he's a damn idiot pervert who doesn't know when that sort of thing is appropriate and not, because he thinks with that bloody other head of his. Rei: Wow...that didn't sound bitter at all.
Asuka: Shut up! Just be quiet and look pretty!
Rei: Asuka: ...Sorry.
Rei: Look, you should know I don't approve of your yuri...or your sapphic collection-
Asuka: You know about that!
Rei: You had it all but lying out. All one had to do was know what they were looking at.
Asuka: How would you know what you were looking at?
Rei: No wonder you don't let Shinji in there.
Asuka: You're avoiding my question.
Rei: AND I certainly don't approve of your pictures of Hikari sleeping...or your pictures of her changing, or the showering pictures, or any of that stuff.
Asuka: You found those!
Rei: They were just under your pillow...why would you keep them there?
Asuka: .
Rei: Never mind. I don't think I want to know. What I do want to know is how you got them. Those are perversions of the sort Kensuke would be great at, if any girls let him within a hundred yards of their homes.
Asuka: Well...I did have Kensuke sort of teach me.
Rei: How did you get him to tell you his secrets?
Asuka: I kinda promissed him the fruits of my labours.
Rei: And you were buggering out about my letter additions? You didn't give them to him, did you!
Asuka: Of course not! Those are mine. And besides, I couldn't have him selling them; Hikari would find out - she always finds out.
Rei: So...how did you get him off your back?
Asuka: Have you seen him around lately? Rei: You didn't...kill him...did you?
Asuka: Oh, nothing so un-nuanced as that. He is quite alive - though NERV has a lot of resources.
Rei: ...You are so going to hell.
Asuka: For what, exactly? I haven't exactly acted on my passions.
Rei: Doesn't it say in the Bible something about lusting and already having committed adultery in your heart.
Asuka: How did you know about that! Rei: I'm Christian.
Asuka: I thought Japanese people were almost all Shinto, or something like that.
Rei: NERV is a bit different, if you hadn't noticed.
Asuka: ...I hadn't.
Rei: Almost everyone here is wearing crosses. Asuka: Oh.
Rei: Asuka: Sorry if I don't notice every single little detail on everybody.
Rei: Asuka: Besides, how did you become Christian, anyways?
Rei: I had a lot of time in that tank to think about my purpose in life, and all that stuff. Asuka: Your purpose in life is to bring about the end of the world You don't need any Bible to tell you that.
Rei: Eh, the Revelation of John is open to interpretation. Asuka: I suppose. Rei: .
Asuka: You know what? I like you.
Rei: I gathered.
Asuka: No! Not in that way!
Rei: Asuka: OK, not just in that way. But as a person, too - even a friend, maybe.
Rei: Really? That's nice...I guess. Why do you bring this up?
Asuka: Well, you mentioned the Rei-tank-
Rei: "Rei-tank"? Asuka: Think about it.
Rei: I suppose it is fitting.
Asuka: Of course. Anyways, that reminded me of that Rei before you. Didn't like her at all. Too much like a doll. Never could get any reaction out of her, except when I badmouthed Shinji.
Rei: She was in love with him, you know. Asuka: Isn't that wierd, though, with her being a clone of his mother and everything?
Rei: Asuka: I know, I know, "Clones are not copies." Don't give me that spiel.
Rei: Still, it's a pity I can't seem to convince Shinji of that.
Asuka: Kinda hard when he is actively trying to avoid you.
Rei: Yah.
Asuka: Bah, don't worry about it. Shinji's not much of anything.
Rei: Probably. But that's not the way she talked about him.
Asuka: She talked about him? To you?
Rei: Kinda like how you talk to the mirror - except we talked back.
Asuka: Ah. Sorta got the story through rose-coloured glasses, huh?
Rei: Sure did. It's difficult to let go of that.
Asuka: Preconception?
Rei: Yes. We never saw him ourselves, so we just had her word to go by.
Asuka: Heh. She never really saw the real Shinji - not like I have. Like I said, don't get too worked up over him. Rei: Still.
Asuka: Bah! That Rei was an odd one anyways. But not you. The other would never question my choice of language, never talk back to me. She just took it all in. I could never get close to her - never have a conversation, like I do with you. Rei: Too bad. She could tell a story.
Asuka: Yes. I've seen them, and her sad poetry. Whatever. It is hot, though.
Rei: What?
Asuka: It's hot.
Rei: Yes...but.
Asuka: Confused? Rei: Very. Asuka: I am a genious. My mind can change gears much more quickly and efficiently than a normal person.
Rei: I don't think that's quite how it works.
Asuka: Hey, who's the genious here? Anyways, the best way to get cool would be to lower our internal temperature. Rei: How are we going to do that?
Asuka: And in a sexy manner.
Rei: Does it have to be sexy?
Asuka: Well, I suppose I could just be you.
Rei: Nuh-uh. You have to do it too. Asuka: Fine. Rei: What about swimming? That can be sexy. Asuka: Do you think the plug-suits will work in chlorinated water? Rei: Probably not. Asuka: Well, then that's out. We don't have our swim-suits with us.
Rei: Do we have to have them? What about skinny-dipping?
Asuka: No way!
Rei: Don't you want to see me naked?
Asuka: Very much so. But there is no way I am getting naked in front of you!
Rei: How modest.
Asuka: It's just my thing.
Rei: Well, we could go back home and get our swim-suits. Asuka: No. We would have to go outside and walk home - and it's way hotter out there. We need cooling now.
Rei: Well...I've got nothing.
Asuka: ...How about ice cream?
Rei: Sounds good. But how is that sexy?
Asuka: We'll have to figure out a way - but I know we can do it!
Rei: Yay us?
Asuka: But we will have to have a contest!
Rei: Wha?
Asuka: Yes, a contest! See who can get the coolest fastest by eating the most ice cream!
Rei: Does everything have to be a competition with you? Asuka: How can I win if there is no competition?
Rei: Asuka: Then let the contest begin! But watch out for the dreaded ice-cream headache!
Rei: Whatever.