Author's Note: Sooo... We're here early.
Too bad I couldn't post chapter four on the 4th... that would have been amusing. But, financial woes from Corona-chan's economic ramifications finally catching up to us have led to the need to post this sooner so I can make sure it gets out at all any time soon. I'm still hunting for a job, so we might have to turn off the internet for a bit.
If nothing else, it means you get to enjoy it sooner, though, so there's our silver lining, lol.
Also, yes, we have a new look, now, so this should make things easier for any new readers to see the important bits (warnings, cough, cough) and have even less of an excuse to bitch about the content of this story. It also makes rants easier to skip if you don't wanna read them. So, yeah.
On with the fic!
Chapter Four: a New Adventure
Deep within a mighty castle seemingly carved from one giant, solid piece of white marble, three women were gathered at a long, rectangular table covered in a black, gold, and purple, silken cloth.
The room seemed to be made of white marble and obsidian, black pillars contrasting nicely against the white stone, black banners with gold accents sporting their guild crest―a purple mushroom―decorating the walls. Two large, highly ornate, purple heart and black velvet chairs sat at either end of the table, the sides both lined with nine oaken, but still quite fancy chairs.
One upon a time, all twenty of the seats had been filled... but now, they were all that remained of their precious guild, the Cult of the Purple Smurf.
Needless to say, their previous guildmaster never took the game all that seriously. Hell, he'd have called it the Cult of the Purple Shroom if he could, but that was one character too long, so he made due. When he passed the torch, falling to the kryptonite of all nerds, the dreaded, glorious pusspuss, and thus quitting the game, their new guildmaster had never bothered to change that name as it had grown on her by then. (1)
The guild's foremost pro player, Boudicca, was the one who had assumed the role.
Said woman sat at the head of the table as was to be expected. Her wavy, blood red locks hung freely behind her, parted on the side and pushed behind one ear with the help of a silver hair clip. Her armor was a classic platekini―highly customized the flaunt the hot-ass, well-toned, well-endowed body she had and was very proud of IRL… almost thirty years ago.. which meant that she looked 13... and that was not at all creepy... not in the fucking slightest!
Ahem...
The armor was black and red in color with silver accents, sporting full, fingered gauntlets; heeled sabatons and leg plates in the form of metallic, thigh-high boots connected to her belt with chains to form pseudo garters; a lightly-padded, plate brasserie connected to her spaulders; a thong; and a mostly-black, silken cape. An ornate arming sword and gladius were on her belt and the kite shield she typically donned was currently in her inventory for convenience.
Her crimson eyes bore a tired look as she let out a heavy sigh.
To her right was a busty dark elf with chocolate skin, amber eyes, and pink hair. She wore a black and dark red, hooded cloak over her black, leather bra and a matching "skirt" that could only be described as a long, silken loincloth, given how little it covered in front. To go with that, she sported a pair of leather, thigh-high boots with shin guards and some fine, leather gloves under her vambraces. Finally, hanging loosely on her belt, she had three matching longswords with varying abilities.
This was Mebuki, a player who unapologetically pushed the limits on what manner of behavior was allowed ingame. Boudicca had always wondered how the man behind that elf had yet to get himself banned and arrested, but he apparently found a way.
Finally, on the left side of the table, further down, was a second human, this one sporting long, golden locks, brown eyes, and freckled cheeks. Some of the woman's hair was pulled back to keep it out of her face and her attire was more traditionally elf-like—green in color, earthy, and functional; donning a green vest; matching trousers; a green cloak; thick, armored, brown leather gloves; and a pair of heavy, armored boots, she was quite thoroughly the most modestly-dressed member of the trio, though that was not saying much to be fair. She wore nothing under the vest and displayed a generous amount of side-boob and cleavage as a result, but that was about it.
Her name was Artemis, a classic roleplayer who based her character off of the Greek goddess in question.
She was also Boudicca's second-in-command, so the fancy chair on the other end was her actual seat. But, in a guild with three members, that rank was rather... unnecessary to be honest.
"Hard to believe it's all coming to an end," Mebuki commented; her voice was low-pitched for a woman, but still distinctly feminine―tailored by her creator to be silky-smooth and alluring. (2)
"Yeah,' Artemis sighed. "I'm going to miss it so much…"
"We all are," Boudicca assured.
When the women spoke, their lips didn't move. This was one of the more unsettling aspects of Yggdrasil, but said game's players learned to get used to it over time.
"You especially, I bet," Mebuki commented.
"Yeah," the redhead admitted. Truth be told, this game was highly therapeutic for her. Mostly because it allowed her to play a glorified game of house better than any other. As it turned out, the woman in question still mourned for the loss of her baby… though her situation was not quite as morbid as that wording would have one believe.
"You should head to your room and see her while you still have the chance," Artemis told her. "We'll be sticking around until the end too, I'm sure."
"Definitely," Mebuki chirped. "Probably gonna be taking one last tour of the place, myself."
"Alright," the redhead replied with a smile. "I'll talk to you two later, then." With that, she got up and headed back to her quarters.
The sound of Boudicca's heels echoing throughout the halls filled her ears as she approached the solar. The room in question was nothing short of huge; a large, decorated hearth sat in the middle of a luxurious lounge and the purple heart floors contrasting rather nicely against the white marble walls; the second floor stopped halfway to make the lounge feel much bigger, sporting a two-level library which housed the guild's vault and the two doors on either side of the fireplace lead to a pair of bedrooms. On the left was Boudicca's and on the right was that of the girl she came here to visit.
Opening the floor to said bedroom, she was greeted with the sight of an NPC she'd, painstakingly customized as best she could in memory of her long lost baby boy.
Unfortunately for Boudicca, she was raised by a single mother, so she had no idea what her father looked like. Also, she got knocked up in middle school… by one of three guys, so discerning what her son would look like at the time was all but impossible.
Still, though, making a "daughter" was close enough for Boudicca.
The girl in question was a half-elf blonde with blue eyes and whisker-like birthmarks. She looked to be about 19, since that was how old her "brother" would have been at the time of her creation... the first time around. The girl's hair was done up in two long pigtails and side swept bangs and she was garbed in some of the best healer's' gear in the game. This NPC was named Mito, after her creator's deceased mother.
"Hey, honey," Boudicca greeted warmly.
The automated girl graced her "mother" with a smile. "Hey, Mama," she replied. "How's your day been?"
Of course, the sight of a teenager calling a girl who looked so much younger than her "Mama" had resulted in many of her guildmates teasing Boudicca on more than one occasion, but she didn't mind. It was all in good fun, after all.
Pushing those thoughts aside, a smile spreading across the redhead's face,as Boudicca sat down right next to her creation.
"It's been rough," she said, "but I'm happy to be home."
Back in his room, Naruto looked in the mirror, multiple items and outfits strewn about the floor from his experiments with passing himself off as an adventurer. With him were two women.
One was that maid whom he'd thanked before the servers shut down, the blonde with the pink eyes.
The girl was named Kokoro and she was a homunculus, just like her 40 sisters―a living construct made from alchemy. As was the case for most of them, she was made to look human. To be more specific, she had the appearance of a woman in her early twenties, at least from what he could see.
Truth be told, he was tempted to have her strip to make sure… for academic purposes. But he resisted.
Still, though… she was really cute and wouldn't mind, right? She was happy to see him when he approached, sputtering shyly and so adorably! She wants him, too… badly; surely, it's okay if she's willing…
'Shut up!' Naruto sighed, silencing the voice in his head once more.
The other was Lupusregina Beta of the Pleiades. Her outfit stood out a bit more among the maids, not just because of the armor, but because of its general design. The skirt was longer for one, with a slit all the way up to her hip, and instead of the frilly headdress most maids donned this one wore a silken cap to hide her dog-like ears.
The woman had tanned skin, amber eyes and her thick, crimson locks done up in a pair of long, giant, braided pigtails, a massive scepter with Nordic themes was slung across her back.
"It might be easier to pass myself off as a mage than a rogue, given the low-level gear we have available," the kitsune told himself, shedding yet another set of gear and making the two maids blush at his nearly nude form… as well as the tent a certain something was making in his undergarments.
Lupusregina in particular was salivating, the ginger maid's primal instincts almost getting the better of her. But, she resisted.
Kokoro, meanwhile, got the hint and handed her master a wizard's robe.
The item in question was the Robe of Hellfire, mostly black in color, with orange, white and yellow, fiery accents. This one was also imbued with a Quickchange Gem. So, if shit were ever to hit the fan because he encountered a few-too-many high-level monsters out there, he could switch back into his top gear and wreck some shit.
As the name implied, it would enhance his more… splodey spells to help Naruto pass himself off as a pyromancer or some such. It also gave him immunity to fire―which might be useful, depending on how commonly he'd have to deal with enemy fire mages.
In his experiences, they were among the most common in games and other fantasy settings, which made sense. Not only did fire have a more "badass" feel to it, but in a world like this one, it would be far easier to abuse, especially for someone with enough knowledge in chemistry. (3)
"Looks good on ya, Milord," Lupusregina chirped, a cheerful grin on her face.
Naruto chuckled and gave her an appreciative nod, before turning to the mirror once more and experimenting with his shapeshifting. The first thing he did was retract his vulpine traits to look human once more. But, the whole point of doing this was to take on a different identity in hopes of avoiding attention while learning more about this world and scouting the area in the guise of an adventurer.
So, the first thing he tried was his real face. His hair shortened a bit and turned blond while his eyes changed to blue. "Too similar," he commented. Then, he made a more... drastic change to see what that would look like. His hair lengthened and his features softened; he then became much shorter… curvier… bustier. When he was done, Naruto found himself eyeballing a woman about fourteen or so in the mirror. "Hmmm…" Her voice was also much more feminine as he took in the new appearance.
Of course, the robe changed with him to… accommodate this new form―turning into more of a dress. It was now very… open in front, showing off a rather excessive amount of her bosom, while slits formed up the sides, all the way up to her hips―totally just for the sake of mobility. The boots and trousers he was wearing with it also changed―the former now reaching up to her mid-thigh, while the latter turned into a garterbelt and stockings.
Staring at the whisker marks, Naruto realized that someone might ask if this girl is the sister of Ainz Ooal Gown or something. That might be harmless, but passing his new form off as being completely unrelated would make for less unnecessary questions, so he made them disappear and had a beauty mark form under the girl's right eye.
"Maybe this'll work…?" Naruto asked, tilting "her" head curiously. No one would guess that this chick was Ainz Ooal Gown, hero of Carne Village, but was it necessary to take his disguise this far? "Maybe not…?" He turned to Lupusregina and asked, "what do you think?"
"It looks so cute!" The redhead giggled, gingerly reaching up and waving her hand above Naruto's head to feel for something that should be there. "So this is an actual shapeshifting ability. Amazing; no one will be able to see past this~!" Even her sense of smell was fooled! She had to admit, it was very impressive!
Naruto's new form now stood a whole head shorter than that of Lupusregina, with a heart shaped face, wide hips, and a modest bust. She looked about 14 or so, the apparent age of adulthood in this world. Naruto gave her a warm chuckle at that. She'd probably say that regardless, but he took the complement and looked back to the mirror. "Now… to give this face a name…" (4)
He thought about it for a moment and the first thing he came up with was the name of his mother. Though he'd never met her, he knew her name as it was on his birth certificate. "Kushina," he chirped. "Uz… uh… ahem… Kushina Uzumaki." Being Japanese, Naruto was still getting used to the more western order names they used here, but it was only a minor inconvenience.
It was a good name and it was the perfect cover for this disguise. What were the chances of there being someone out there being able to trace it back to him? Minimal. Hell, he'd go so far as to call it impossible…
"That's a very pretty name, Lord Kurama," Kokoro chimed in.
"Yeah, it is, isn't it?'' Naruto nodded to himself before smiling at the blonde. "It was my mother's."
Lupusregina perked up when she heard that, now very curious, but said nothing… at least for now.
"Now, for a good staff," the disguised kitsune mused aloud.
The towheaded maid nodded and gathered several that she'd brought here from their treasury at his behest.
The now-disguised kitsune reached out and cast a spell to help him choose the best one for his build. "Identify!"
It was one of the very few divination spells he knew, one that could, as the name suggests, discern the properties of something―specifically of the magical variety. It was pretty weak, only working on potions, weapons, and armor, and any effects that the user has yet to unlock would remain hidden. But, as a trade-off, it was able to appraise multiple magical items with a single casting, so the spell had its uses.
Thus, Naruto took a staff in either hand, inspecting and comparing them. Then, setting one aside, he checked to see how another stacked up to the one he still held and kept at it until the best match for his little disguise was found.
But, before heading out into the world, there were a pair of certain someones he needed to check on first…
Now back in his true form and Divine-Class gear, Naruto found himself wandering the wasteland that was Nazarick's 8th Floor. By his side was Victim, serving as his guide.
"Princess Fumiko has been quite restless as of late," the fetal angel commented. "She is often complaining about having nothing to do."
"Figured she would. She gets bored so easily," Naruto chuckled. He'd seen that coming from a mile away, given how he'd written her to be. "It's why I'm here. The poor thing would probably go insane if I didn't give her something to do while I'm gone."
Speaking of…
"Papaaa~!"
A black, white and pink blur hit Naruto dead center and he found himself skidding across the wasteland from the force of a certain NPC's tackle.
The girl in question was a pale-skinned one with pink hair done up in messy pigtails, the bangs framing her face. She had a single horn in the center of her forehead, curving upwards, and her ears were pointed―both making it clear that she was not human. To be more specific, she was a kijo—female oni. Unlike Naruto, however, she was of the more modern, ogre-like variety mentioned in Peronroncino's encyclopedia.
Her attire was that of a fully-armored samurai, minus the helm and face mask―black, white, and pink in color with a white tiger pelt around her waist.
"Hello, Fumiko-chan," Naruto chuckled.
"Sorry 'bout that, Boss," another feminine voice grumbled. "Damn girl's got no chill."
The one who spoke was a dark skinned, young woman who looked to be between 14-16 or so, a flat look of disapproval in her slit, glowing, amber eyes. She was a redhead with black sclerae, her crimson locks hanging freely all the way down to her well-toned ass with messy, semi-short bangs partially covering her face. Five bone-white horns formed a crown upon her head, one in the center, right on top, while the others jaggedly shot outward and forward.
Though the other girl's armor hid it, this one was far more lithe and petite, with a smaller bosom. Her attire was also more akin to that of a caster as she sported a full, black, white and red kimono with a black sash and tabi, and traditional zouri. The robe was mostly red, sporting a fiery motif, and a silver flute was tucked into her sash, serving as the only hint that she was more specifically a bard. Like the pinkette, she too was a kijo.
"It's fine, Tayuya-chan," Naruto assured her with a warm chuckle. "The enthusiasm's kinda endearing. Besides, I'm here to talk to you two, so this saves time, anyways."
When designing the defenses of the 8th Floor, Ainz Ooal Gown entrusted the task to the guild's power-gamers, including him. To be more specific, as one of the guild's foremost experts on crowd control and exploitative motherfuckery, he was tasked with creating the CC specialist and a bulky DPS—the latter of whom could double as an emergency tank if needed—for the killsquad they called the 8th Floor Hierarchy. Of course, the blond-turned-redhead helped with other things, serving as the primary consultant on one of the other members, for example, and Naruto decided that when he was done with them, he should give his creations a bit more… personality.
Thus, the first one he created was written as a hot-blooded, excitable trouble-maker, eager to prove herself to Papa. Then, he named her Fumiko, ironically spelling said name with the kanji for "disciplined child" because he found it funny. The suggestion came from Peronroncino and upon hearing it, Naruto simply couldn't name her anything else.
The second, meanwhile, was more chill, but grumpy, with a sailor's tongue and a tendency to call him "Boss". Naruto wasn't sure why, but he thought it would be cute… and wasn't disappointed when she did precisely that.
"Ooh!" Fumiko perked up at that. "What do ya wanna talk about?"
Like her sister Tayuya, the pinkette had glowing, amber eyes with black sclerae and slit pupils and hers were wide with curiosity and excitement.
"Just something for you to do so your boredom doesn't drive you and everyone else insane while I'm out and about." He chuckled again, giving his older-looking creation a hug.
"Oooh~! What is it, what is it?" Fumiko asked, looking up at Papa with a sparkle in her eyes. "Do I get to break someone's legs~?" (5)
Tayuya groaned, fighting back the headache that threatened to form.
"You could say that," Naruto replied awkwardly. "Just make sure you behave, okay?"
''Of course, Papa~!"
For some reason, Fumiko's sincerity wasn't reassuring in the slightest, but he took her word for it.
About an hour later, at around 8am or so, "Kushina Uzumaki" and her "childhood friend, Regina" were traveling towards a road to E-Rantel. It was quite a ways south of Nazarick, but they weren't bothered at all by it.
To go with his new attire, Naruto had on a magic circlet which would protect him from mind control effects and telepathy. Meanwhile, his staff would allow him to maximize one fire spell per day without actually using the Metamagic ability in question, and thus not increasing its mana cost in the process. It also increased the range of his fire spells.
Lupusregina, meanwhile, was now garbed in more… priestly attire, consisting of a white cloak and a black and white robe. Her massive, conspicuous scepter was swapped out for a more traditional staff―albeit with a stabby bit at the end for it to double as a spear. She did retain her hat, though, since it concealed her doggy-ears.
"Lord Kura―'' Lupusregina began.
"Ah-ah-ah." Naruto turned to face her, wagging a finger in front of her, "It's Kushina now. Ku-shi-na. Understood?"
"Yes, Lo―uh… I mean, Kushina."
Naruto sighed.
"We're gonna have to work on that, won't we?"
Lupusregina rubbed the back of her head, laughing nervously. "My apologies; I'm just… not used to referring to you so casually is all. It feels weird, y'know?"
"Everyone seems to feel that way. Can't say I blame anyone though. So… you were saying?"
Lupusregina perked up at that. "Ah, right!" She chuckled sheepishly. "I almost forgot… so… If you don't mind me asking, I'm curious about your mother."
Naruto shrugged. "Sorry, but I can't help you there… never got to know her."
Lupusregina flinched. "Oh… M-my apologies."
"Don't sweat it," Naruto chuckled, politely waving her words off. "You couldn't have known unless you asked."
Lupusregina didn't know what to say, resulting in long, but somewhat comfortable silence washed over the two before Naruto broke it, squinting at some commotion in the distance.
"Is that… a caravan?"
"Looks like it," Lupusregina commented, leaning over Naruto, completely oblivious to the disguised youko turning beet red as he felt her tits against his head. "Looks like one of their wagons broke."
"Oh, you can see with that much detail from here?"
Lupusregina nodded proudly, still draped over the pseudo blonde. "Yup, yup~!"
"Very interesting," Naruto said. "Let's check it out, then. This is a perfect opportunity to find out more about the area… and maybe the Empire seeing how they appear to be coming from there. Merchants tend to know a lot, after all."
And with that, the two of them headed on down to meet with the caravan.
"Hey there," one of the men called out, noticing two young maidens approaching. "What brings you here?"
The guy in question was a large, middle-aged man with a mustache and a prominent gut, garbed in simple but nice clothes. He was clearly no peasant, but still a far cry from nobility.
"Hello," Naruto chirped, giving the man a charming grin. "My friend and I were heading to E-Rantel after a bit of exploration further north and we noticed that you were stuck."
"Oh that?" The man gave him a hearty laugh. "It's nothing two young ladies like you should worry yourselves about. Thank you for the concern, though."
"Don't mention it," Naruto giggled. "I'm Kushina Uzumaki, by the way, and this is Regina. Nice to meet you!"
"Nice to meet you too, Mrs?"
"Miss Uzumaki," Naruto clarified, quickly getting the hint. "You can call me Kushina, though," he added with a smile and a curtsy.
"I'm Doman," the man replied. "And that over there is my son, Kashu." he waved a hand towards, before shouting, "Oi, boy! Have some manners and come greet these two!" (6)
When the boy finally ran over, and noticed the two denizens of Nazarick, he almost fell over, managing to recover from his stumble in the last second. Blushing for a moment, he laughed at himself before approaching Naruto with an arm offered in a handshake. "Sorry for that. I'm Kashu."
Naruto took the hand and shook it gently, a kind smile on his face. "Pleased to meet you, Kashu," he chirped. "I'm Kushina."
"And I'm Regina," Lupusregina added, leaning over Naruto and giving the young man a two-fingered salute. Of course, Naruto blushed hard at her breasts being right back on his head again. "So, where are you guys heading, if you don't mind me asking?"
"Same place you are, actually," Doman said with a smile. "This road only leads to E-Rantel. You can feel free to hop in the back when we get the carriage fixed if you want; can't have two cuties like you taking such a long trip all alone."
"Really now?" Naruto asked eagerly, playing the part of an honest, curious maiden. If they tried anything, he knew the two of them could murder ever last one of these guys and steal their shit, so safety was of no concern at the moment. "That would be wonderful; thank you, sir!"
With that and a nod, Doman got back to work on the carriage.
While that was going down, Naruto spent the time they waited talking with Kashu, getting on his good side and taking full advantage of the boy's obvious crush on his disguise.
It didn't take nearly as long as they thought it would for the caravan to start moving again.
Soon enough, Naruto was making some moves on Kashu, interrogating him about everything of interest the young boy knew of their destination. The boy, blushing at the attention of such a fair beauty, told them everything he knew over the next few days.
The mighty city of E-Rantel was quite an impressive sight, Naruto had to admit. It didn't compare to some of the more fantastical ones he'd seen in Yggdrasil, but the more down-to-earth grandeur made it seem more real… more tangible, while those flying cities and such felt more like a dream.
Sitting on the crossroads of three major trade routes, the settlement was second only to Re-Estize's Royal Capital in terms of grandeur―at least according to Kashu.
The young man knew quite a bit about it, in fact, being surprisingly well-traveled for his age. It was legitimately impressive.
That being said, the city itself was remarkably huge, protected by three concentric walls with the most up-to-date battlements money could buy. Behind the innermost wall was the administrative heart and military headquarters, raised up by a natural hill so as to wreak havoc on anyone who managed to get past the first two lines of defense. Between the next and outermost wall was a buffer zone, a first line of defense, filled to the brim with barracks, training grounds, and military storage facilities. Finally, nestled between E-Rantel's "heart" and the "buffer zone" sat the city proper.
"Thank you so much for the ride," Naruto chirped. "I definitely owe ya one."
"Don't mention it, young lady. Not only is it a man's duty to help, but Kashu's been needing someone to talk to for the longest time; his enjoyment is all the pay I need."
Naruto nodded understandingly, giving Doman a charming smile. "It was my pleasure~!" He then turned towards Lupusregina, who was eyeballing the soldiers as they passed through the second gate. "Regina, we should go on our own from here."
"Sure thing, Kushina," the redhead answered.
Soon after, the carriage stopped and the two of them were helped off, a fidgeting Kashu looking disappointed that Naruto was leaving.
"B-be safe, Kushina," he called out.
Naruto turned and blew the boy a kiss, before sauntering off with Lupusregina in tow. As soon as he was out of earshot, though, the disguised youko and his companion ducked into a nearby alley so he could vent.
"Fuuuck, I feel so dirty! This disguise might be more trouble than it's worth!"
"Not into guys?" Lupusregina asked with a teasing grin.
"Hell no," Naruto grunted. "Half tempted to just drop the look and stick my dick into the nearest hot chick, just to cleanse myself..."
At that, Lupusregina gave him a sadistic grin. "Shall I round up some cuties for you to choose from~?"
Well, that knocked him right out of his funk… and the appeal made him just a teensy bit concerned. Maybe Narberal would've been a better choice after all?
"No… no need," he muttered, "there's too many people around to try something like that."
The werewolf frowned at that, looking confused, but nodded after a moment of thought. Now that he mentioned it, while humans were laughably weak and she herself was a healer, they were surrounded by thousands of the creatures, several of whom were highly trained and heavily armed; there was no telling what might happen if they got caught. "R-right," she muttered, averting her gaze. "My apologies."
"Don't sweat it," he said. "You were just trying to help… and it was kinda cute!" Well, the thought was at least… Though Naruto could've done without the mental images, he appreciated her efforts to please him.
Lupusregina stared at him long and hard, blinking owlishly and feeling her cheeks start to burn. "Uh… thanks."
Naruto threw his hand over her shoulders, pulling the woman close. "See? You're already talking to me like a normal person. I'm proud."
The poor redhead only blushed harder at that. While she herself was a notorious tease, Lupusregina was not at all used to being on the receiving end of that shit. (7)
"Aw, you're so adorable~!" He cooed, leaning in closer, and the disguised man couldn't keep the grin off his face when she started sputtering out of sheer embarrassment. Unfortunately for her, that reaction only made him want to keep it up.
But, alas, all good things had to come to an end eventually. Naruto had something more important to do...
Eventually letting up on the poor, sputtering cutie, he poked his head out of the alley and looked around with a thoughtful hum. "Now, if I was a guild, where would I set up shop?" He then approached one of the guards and decided to ask for directions. "Excuse me, sir," he called out. "I'm new here. How far away is the business center?"
"Hmm…? It's not far at all, actually. Just keep heading down that road right there." He pointed at one to their left.
Naruto smiled at him and gave the guard a curtsy. "Thank you!"
The guard blinked, staring for a moment before his fellow nudged him with a chuckle. Giving the man in question an annoyed look, he readdressed Naruto to respond, only to see that the "caster-girl" was already gone.
Not even five minutes later, Naruto and Lupusregina were at their destination.
Apparently, E-Rantel had several plazas, but this one was by far the biggest. It was filled with stalls and workshops, selling all manner of goods and services. A very familiar pair of young, fair maidens turned many a head therein as they bounced around this stall and that, mostly selling a good chunk of the gear Naruto and Aura had looted from those soldiers of the Slane Theocracy. Then, they made a beeline for the guild hall to register themselves as the magic caster, Kushina Uzumaki, and the cleric, Regina.
Naruto and Lupusregina emerged from the hall an hour later and sought a place to stay. Of course, in the process of their registration, he and his companion both realized to their dismay that neither of them could read the written language of this world. They both hid it well, though, and the whole thing went by without a hitch, thanks to Naruto cheesing it with an ability called Decipher Script. It wasn't a perfect solution as he only got a rough understanding of what those scribbles said, but in the end, the two of them now sported necklaces with copper plates to signify their rank as rookies. (8)
The pseudo-blonde looked around.
According to the receptionist, there was an inn nearby… and as luck would have it, something that looked like one sat only a few buildings away from the guild hall. So, he opted to try there first. As it turned out, he was right, and upon entering, Naruto found himself a rather filthy-looking establishment.
The ground floor was a dining hall of sorts, sporting a bar in the back with several round tables throughout. A spiral staircase lead to the next level from the center of this room and an empty fireplace beyond it presumably served as the primary source of heat when winter came. Most of the patrons here were male, as one would expect, and the atmosphere was extremely tense, the constant threat of violence hanging in the air.
Despite how many people were here, though, it didn't feel too crowded as the room itself was quite spacious. But the eyes of damn near everyone here upon him and Lupusregina since the instant they entered, as if sizing them up, and it left Naruto on edge. Taking a deep breath, he pushed aside the urge to show these little shits their real place in the pecking order and addressed the man in a dirty apron mopping up a sizable, red stain that clearly hadn't come from wine.
He was fucking huge, looking far more like a bouncer than the innkeeper, despite his age. The large, burly arms exposed by his rolled up sleeves were covered in scars, His head was shaved clean, many more scars could be seen upon his face, and his steely eyes bore the thousand-yard stare of a man who'd seen some shit. Behind the old man, in a frame upon the pillar that held up the stairs, hung a necklace with a golden plate.
"Fear the old man in a profession where most die young," Naruto quoted under his breath.
"Wise words, princess," the man grunted. "I'll give ya that much credit. What're ya lookin' for?"
"My friend and I would like to share a room for the night," Naruto told him with a polite smile.
"Five coppers," the innkeeper said. "Food's usually oatmeal and vegetables. Might be getting days-old bread instead o' the oatmeal, though. Meat's an extra copper."
"We'll go for the meat as well, then," Naruto chirped.
The man snorted rudely.
"You've got guts, princess," he told the disguised kitsune. "But there are three inns that cater to adventurers here and mine's the worst. You know why they sent ya here?"
Naruto raised an eyebrow at that, only causing the man to frown in disapproval. Truth be told both he and Lupusregina knew full well that the receptionist was hiding some manner of ill intent, but they weren't quite sure as to why just yet.
"I don't know what noble house you're from," the innkeeper said, "but this is the real world, princess, and they're tryin' ta give you a taste of it. The people who stay here are mostly copper and iron-plates, so you'll be able to form a party that matches your strength here… if you're lucky."
His tone implied that it was a very big if, too.
Then, the old man shrugged. "It's fine if you wanna stay in the room, but if you don't make contracts here, you won't be able to find more party members. If you can't form a balanced party, then you will die. That said, it's advised for novices with no comrades to advertise themselves in places with more people. So, will it be a room or the dorms, princess?"
Naruto blinked at that. This guy obviously thought he was nobility for some reason, but at the same time, he was also looking out for them… in his own way. The pseudo-blonde plastered on a charming smile and gave his answer. "Room for now," he said. "I am a girl who doesn't know whom to trust quite yet, after all, so I have safety concerns in… other departments, if you will."
Of course, that battle with the Sunlight Scripture made it clear that they wouldn't get anywhere near him before dying horribly… and possibly getting eaten by Lupusregina, but it was better to be safe than sorry. For her sake more than his.
"I'll need to see which one's safer for myself before I make that decision in the long run, and it's getting kinda late," Naruto continued, giving the man a curtsy. "Thanks for your concern, though!"
The innkeeper huffed at that. "You've got a good head on yer shoulders," he admitted, "I'll give ya that. Don't lose it out there. Six coppers, then."
Naruto handed him the payment in question and the man went back to cleaning after handing him a key..
"Room's the first one on your right once you get up the stairs," the innkeeper grunted.
"Thank you~!" With that, Naruto headed towards the stairs.
But then, someone extended a foot to try and trip him. The perpetrator had a nasty, annoying grin on his face, mirrored by everyone at his table as they all stared at Naruto and Lupusregina.
The former stopped before he could trip. A quick glance at the man's necklace made it clear that he was an iron-plate. Naruto then swiftly looked around and saw that no one made a move to step in. They all just watched, even the innkeeper, all of them waiting to see how this exchange played out.
"That's real cute, bitch," Naruto chirped, giving the man a flat grin. "Do you do that to every random stranger you come across or am I just special~?" He would have said something more scathing, but didn't want to escalate this situation... too much.
The iron-plate scoffed. "Maybe you are," he said, standing up to loom over the "little girl" before him. "Them's some high-end magic items ya got. Did yer daddy buy 'em for ya?" He reached out to grab the staff, a hungry gleam in his eyes.
The response he got came in but a single word. "Fling!"
Then, with a wave of Naruto's hand, the man was sent into a nearby wall, before comically bouncing off and around the tavern like a pinball; he eventually came to a stop at the disguised youko's feet, landing flat on his face and giving the ground a big ol' hug. By some miracle, the only thing broken in the process was the iron rank's pride.
"I am so sorry!" Naruto said sheepishly, "that was far more spectacular than I intended."
Funny as fuck, though…
'...Agreed,' Naruto thought, not telling that voice in his head to shut up for once.
"Don't make a habit of it," the innkeeper grunted, before glaring at the man's comrades, silently warning them not to fuck with the "girl" any further.
Lupusregina, meanwhile, giggled, curiously poking the prone adventurer and drawing a groan from him. "Oh, wow, he survived," she commented, mildly impressed. "Too bad~!"
"There was no need to take it that far," Naruto giggled. "He's just a punk who needed to be taught how not to treat a lady is all. Now, let's go rest for a bit."
"Right behind ya~!"
"...Princess," the innkeeper called out, catching Naruto's attention. He reached into his pocket and handed the disguised man his money back. "Your stay's on the house for that one."
"Much appreciated~!" Naruto chirped. Clearly, he'd earned some manner of respect in the process, so it was only appropriate to show his own in return.
"You look like the type who can handle herself," the innkeeper said with a shrug. "Just don't cause me any trouble and we're good."
The door to their room closed with a thud and Naruto was quick to lock it, before casting a spell on it. "Magic Lock!"
The spell in question was a favorite among Arcane Tricksters; it would prevent anyone from picking the lock and reinforced the door frame, making it harder to just kick in. Of course, someone could still take an axe to the door itself, but the noise would attract attention―theirs in particular.
And any fucker dumb enough to try that shit would die. Painfully.
Setting those thoughts aside, he cast another spell for good measure, tapping his staff on the ground while he was at it. "Private Sanctum!"
A shockwave seemed to ripple through the air from the point of impact, enveloping their room. This spell was a magic ward, keeping any sounds from escaping this room and protecting it from divination magic. These functions only worked one way, though, meaning they could still hear what was going on outside and use divination magic of their own normally.
Nodding in satisfaction, Naruto opened up the shutters to let some air and sunlight in before looking around. The room itself was very sparsely furnished, sporting only two crudely-made beds, just as many chests for their belongings, and a rickety end table. Fortunately for them, they had a window to look out of. And a half-used candle on the table to light up the room, but that was it.
"Damn, this place looks like shit," Lupusregina muttered.
"Now, now," Naruto told her, "don't be too harsh; we are noobs, after all, so it makes sense that we're not living like royalty quite yet." He fiddled with the new necklace thoughtfully. The small, copper plate was much like a set of dog tags donned by soldiers around the world to denote one's rank. (9)
The biggest difference was that they did so by being made from one of eight different metals: copper, iron, silver, gold, platinum, mithril, orichalcum, and adamantite. The further down the list, the more valuable the metal. The more valuable the metal, the higher the rank as one would expect.
"If you say so," the battle maid muttered, a pout marring her pretty face. She looked around with a look of distaste; her lord deserved so much better than this shit room!
Naruto chuckled warmly, reaching up and standing on his toes to pat her on the head. The act made that pout go away in an instant. "We won't be stuck like this forever," he assured. "Just tough it out and we'll climb up the social ladder soon enough."
That was why they were here, after all; Naruto opted to head out and pose as an adventurer so as to gather information on others of this profession. They were reputed to be the strongest people in the world, after all. Also, given what quests one would find in an MMO, even before VR was a thing, a player from Yggdrasil would likely be drawn to said profession because of its familiarity. If any others did exist in this world, the adventurer's guild was a good place to look for them.
But, at the same time, many of them would likely support the Slane Theocracy…
The vast, overwhelming majority of players were humanoid as they were afforded a lot more freedom ingame than demihumans and heteromorphs, at least as far as pure mechanics were concerned. Also, while elves were more popular, humans tended to crawl out of the woodwork and were thus the second-biggest chunk of the playerbase by a ridiculous margin.
That said, in the words of those from said nation, the Slane Theocracy fought tooth and nail to ensure that humanity would prosper. Unlike his own world, people were not at the top of the food chain, here. Hell, they weren't even in the top ten! In fact, among the sapient species, they were the weakest, only making up for their shortcomings in intelligence and cooperation. And their birthrates.
Even elves paled in comparison, according to the Theocracy, though he wasn't sure yet if they were just biased in that regard. Said nation was very humanocentric, after all, even frowning upon other humanoid races.
Regardless, even in the realm of intelligence and cooperation, humans were not always on top; many other races were both more powerful and had more advanced civilizations than humanity, but those civilizations apparently found themselves at odds with a group called the Eight Kings of Avarice, 500 years ago. Humanity was among the very few survivors of that conflict.
So, yeah, given that backstory, Naruto had no doubt that the vast, overwhelming majority of human players would side with the Slane Theocracy if anyone, and they accounted for roughly one-third of Yggdrasil's playerbase if he wasn't mistaken.
Lupusregina, oblivious to his reasoning, sighed and relented with a nod. "As you wish, Lord Kurama."
"Try not to call me that while we're in disguise," Naruto told her. "The walls have ears, as they say, and Private Sanctum's not a perfect defense; it can be countered like anything else."
"Uh… right… sorry," she replied, looking a bit sheepish.
"It's fine," the disguised kitsune assured. "That being said, we'll be returning to the guild tomorrow to see what kind of work we can get."
"Sounds like a plan~!" Lupusregina chirped.
Naruto nodded with a smile, before closing the window and casting yet another spell.
"Dancing Lights!"
Eight illusory lanterns appeared in the room, granting them an effectively-free light source. It still cost MP, but only a small amount that would undoubtedly be replenished long before he found himself needing it.
Leaning his staff against the bed, Naruto extracted the Magic Satchel from his belt and plopped it on the bed before starting to strip and get ready for bed. Interestingly, the robe didn't revert to its original form when he shed it, and neither did the boots and trousers, as he'd noticed when they were traveling here with the caravan. Pushing those thoughts aside, he laid them on the bed.
"Clean!"
Then, with a wave of his hand, the clothing and bed were all enveloped with a golden aura as his magic got to work doing precisely what the incantation's name implied. Once that was done, he put all of his gear into the satchel, his staff sinking into said bag as though it were passing through nothing but air.
Then, putting his underwear back on, he fished out a nightshirt from his satchel, put it on, and went to bed... all the while doing his damnedest not to look at the battlemaid as she did the same lest he be tempted to drop his transformation and mount her.
Surely, she'd be willing, though…
'Shut up!'
Speaking of temptation, though, he found himself staring at many a young maiden along the way, and it was hard to contain himself when they got too close, so he should try to avoid them, too.
But, still… the feel of their warmth, their cries of pain and unwanted pleasure… They'd be so delicious~! He could get away with it once or twice, right…?
'Shut up!'
But he wanted to… so badly...
'I SAID SHUT UP!'
Needless to say, this might very well have been a terrible idea...
Boudicca (Player: Unknown)
[Holy Warrior-Queen] (10)
Race:
Human
Racial Classes:
None; humanoids don't have them.
Job Classes:
Paladin: 15
Templar: 15
Holy Knight: 10
Cleric: 15
High Cleric: 10
Battle Cleric: 10
Evil Slayer: 5
Runecaster: 10
Valkyrie: Sword and Shield: 10
Total Level:
100 (Job)
Character Stats:
HP: 88
MP: Limit Exceeded
Physical Attack: 56
Physical Defense: 95
Agility: 20
Magical Attack: 56
Magical Defense: 95
Resistance: 80 (11)
Special: 100
Karma Rating:
500 (Extreme Good)
DMS Notes and Trivia:
1: Fun fact: when I played WoW, I tried to start my own guild… twice. The first attempt was Cult of the Purple Smurf. Its crest was a purple mushroom. Inspired by the name of another guild on that same server, Once Upon a Shroom, I wanted to name it Cult of the Purple Shroom, but that was one character too long.
That being said, both attempts failed, but all of my toons on either server were added to the rosters before everyone left, allowing me to use the guild vaults as shared bank vaults for them, so it was all good, lol.
When creating this guild, I simply couldn't help but name it after one of those two guilds for funsies. XD
2: I mean... I don't know for sure if voice-changing tech was a thing in Yggdrasil, but at the same time, the game in question does use customization and self-expression as selling points and we have that technology right now. In upwards of 100 years, I see no reason why they wouldn't have it or why it would be particularly difficult to implement into a game that is played by literally plugging the console into one's brain.
That aside, we've got the hardcore power-gamer in the form of Boudicca, a woman who basically peaked in her teens and regrets it, playing video games as a form of therapy.
We've got the classic G.I.R.L. In the form of Mebuki, the pervy elf who's grown on them after the years of being... tolerated. There's always that one guy somewhere on the server, eh? I should know; I was one of them.
Come with me to Pornshire and I will show you a land of adventure~! XD
And finally, we have the traditional roleplayer in the form of Artemis, an old friend of Boudicca's IRL. Not much more to say about her at the moment.
I like this setup.
3: As far as I can tell, fire magic probably would be the most common in a typical high fantasy setting with lightning being up there as well… if applicable, of course. It would also depend on how common fire immunity is in the setting itself, among other things, but I digress. Both are far easier to abuse than most in the usual high fantasy context, though it depends on how creative you are, like most things.
4: Though I tend to always mention this in one rant or another in my other stories, not everyone reads them. So, I'll say it again here: a lotta people don't seem to realize this, but 18 being the age of adulthood is a relatively new concept. In Great Britain, for example, a boy was considered a man at the age of 12 for centuries, most notably throughout the medieval period. And in many places around the world, a girl was considered a woman upon her first period—which is known to happen as late as 16 and as early as 9.
The more you know.
That said, I wasn't able to find a canon age of adulthood for the New World, so I went with 14, since it seemed reasonable enough.
5: And thus, we are introduced to the two "princesses" of Nazarick. Buckle up bitches and prepare for a long one! It's not a rant, but this one's gonna be a bit rambly.
Starting with Tayuya, since she's the more obvious one, this is indeed Tayuya from Naruto as a kijo, a female oni. Or more accurately, an OC who draws VERY heavily upon her. Pretty sure her primary class is rather obvious, given the musical talents of her canon counterpart, lol.
In terms of appearance, she is partially inspired by the story of a woman in Mino Provence who became a kijo after gelling up her hair to look like horns, donning a red dress, and killing her husband—hence the mostly-red kimono. The five horns instead of four were a creative liberty and her tendency to call Naruto "boss" is a callback to Team Konohamaru.
As for Fumiko, apparently, a potential way to spell her name (章子) means "disciplined child", according to a Japanese name site I used. When I saw this potential meaning, I simply had to go with it... and make it so she doesn't live up to that name in the fucking slightest. XD
AdVictoriamCustodes insisted that I add an OC based on Mordred from Fate and he talked me into it. So, yeah, that's her primary source of inspiration. I also draw heavily from Nora Valkyrie for this one, hence the "break someone's legs" line.
Given that the 8th Floor is supposed to be populated by a death squad of super-powerful NPCs that we've never got to meet to my knowledge, I decided that having two of them be created by Naruto was the best route to give him some "daughters" as it were, so I placed them here.
Of course, this is not the only place for such NPCs; Rem and Ram would make for nice homunculus maids, for example, if you wanted to do that in your own fanfiction. There's also that city on the 9th floor as another example. Those NPC are likely to be rather low-level, but giving that area its own little guardian, if only as a way to punish invaders for taking a wrong turn, seems like something this guild would do. Let's also not forget that a level 85 NPC is still a legit threat to max-level players under the right circumstances, so said guardian doesn't even have to be level 100 to do its job as a hidden boss.
Just a little food for thought, lol.
6: A reference to the main character of G-Gundam, Domon Kasshu. I fucking loved that silly-ass anime! XD
7: I mean, I don't know if it's canon or not, but I could picture that so easily... Lupusregina just somehow comes off as the kinda tease who gets all flustered when on the receiving end of her own shenanigans. To be teased by a Supreme One on top of that would probably just make it worse, methinks, lol.
8: Registering without knowing how to read seems like it'd be pretty difficult. How did Momonga pull this off in canon? Does anyone know? O.o If he knew the D&D spell Comprehend Languages or had those spectacles he gave Sebas in the manga, then that "I can't read" scene at the quest board simply wouldn't have been a thing, right?
9: One thing that tends to bother me about the "trapped in a game" Isekai I've watched is the lack of gamer slang, particularly in the English dubs. Can't say much about the sub, since I don't speak Japanese, let alone know what their equivalent would sound like, but I digress. You'd think the gamers who were trapped in the given setting would sound the part, so it's kinda immersion-breaking when they don't.
10: Hmmm, I wonder who that is, lol.
11: Right… buckle in, bitches, it's time for another long one! Not really a rant, but it's still lengthy.
That said, though... Seriously, what the hell is Special?
What is Resistance and how is it any different from the... presumed "other" defensive stats? Is it even the defensive stat it sounds like? I mean, it'd be weird if it wasn't, but for all I know, it's a fucking flight stat!
I did my best to look this up, and to my knowledge, no one knows... so, for the purpose of continuing this story despite this apparent (at this time) lack of information, the in-universe functions of these stats in the Vulpine Overlord AU are as follows:
Resistance: one's ability to resist non-spell abilities (like a lich's Draining Touch, a rogue's stun ability, or a dragon's fire breath) and non-damaging spells that affect an opposing player or character (Earth Bind, mind control spells, that kinda thing).
Special: a "magical attack" stat of sorts for one's non-spell abilities like the previously-mentioned Draining Touch. A rogue's Sneak Attack and the paladin's Lay on Hands would also be affected by this stat. It basically determines how powerful they are, potentially among other things. How many times per day you can use some abilities or how long their cooldowns are comes to mind.
I'm also gonna go ahead and assume that the potency of non-damaging spells, if applicable, are affected by one's Special, rather than Magical attack (summoning spells and buff spells that increase stats by a static amount, meanwhile, would be unaffected by either stat). So, crowd control, self-healing, and non-static buff or debuff spells, for example, would be Special-based.
Also, some of these abilities require MP and some don't as my headcanon for why the hell Sebas and Cocytus have literally any at all.
Parting Note: Fucking shit... sorry for the length. I'll do my best to keep such long ANs to a minimum in the future, but yeah... I had a lot to say, lol.
Here's hoping that my wife and I are just being paranoid. If so, next update will be for The Mirran on the 18th as usual with VO being scheduled for New Year's Day. If not, then the next chapters will be up when it's up and updates will continue as usual then... or be much quicker. Likely the latter, since I've been working on editing chapters in advance and should finish by then if a blank period does happen. So, if nothing else, there's that to look forward to. =3
That said, I hope y'all enjoyed and I look forward to continuing! :)