What's happening to me? What's wrong with me?
I can't see anything. I can't feel anything. Where am I? I feel as if I'm asleep. I feel as though I'm being rocked back and forth, as if I were on a boat.
When I try to move, I can't. Ugh… I'm so tired… if I am asleep, why doesn't time pass quickly? Is it? If I'm asleep, how can I think clearly? Is this a dream?
What happened? I was looking at the pictures in Hoagie's living room, when I found a new room. Was I already dreaming? Is it all a dream? Maybe I'm lying in my bed in Japan, and I'm just making everything up.
… No. That isn't possible. I've felt everything so clearly since my mom announced we'd be moving. It wasn't a dream, I'm sure of that. But who did I see in the dining room? It was my family, right? I even saw myself. But…
… I couldn't have seen myself! It seemed so real, even if it did feel far away. I saw everything so unclearly, like a dream I've had that I'm trying to remember.
Owww… the pain… it felt so weird, standing there. It felt like I was standing in front of a tidal wave, the realization that something wasn't right slowly coming up to me. I could feel it like I would be able to see the tidal wave coming to me, but I couldn't get away.
Did I want to? I don't think I did. The weird thing was the feeling.
It was like a movie behind a window. The window was like the front window of a car, only I was standing up and the window was straight. I saw the empty dining room, but before I noticed it, the car lurched forward. I didn't stumble backwards, I just felt scared. Scared of what was coming. I had no idea what it was. Meh… I still don't…
But I was racing forwards, but the car didn't slow down. I had the same feeling as if I were about to crash into it. The car stopped suddenly, and I felt a feeling of shock when I saw the people who were sitting at the table.
It was like floodwaters. It takes a long time until it comes, but I could feel something was happening. And then it hits me, suddenly, like a wave. It hits so hard it hurts, and then it laps gently at my knees, telling me it's real.
I'm in pain. As if the car stopped so suddenly I crashed against the window. As if the wave swept me away completely.
I heard people saying random things. I heard my dad, and afterwards my mom. Then I heard myself. Am I going insane?
No, I'm not. I don't know a lot of things, but I know that I am not insane. It was like a dream, but somehow I know it's more than that.
It was like someone was telling me a story. And then just when I started understanding what was happening, it all went black. It was so horrible. I felt almost as though I was about to say, 'Oh, I remember this.' But then the storyteller got interrupted, and it all went black.
I heard a scream. Not a horror scream, just the scream of a shocked little girl. Something terrible must have happened. Was I the one screaming? I have a feeling as though I was the one screaming.
It felt… as though the blackness was part of the story.
Ugh, I wish I would just WAKE UP!
… If I'm even asleep.
Wait… where's Mushi? Is she here, sitting at my bedside?
… If she is, she had better wake me up.
What about Mom and Dad? Are they worried about me?
I bet.
I wonder where I am. I wonder if I'm at home, or if I'm still at Hoagie's. Maybe time's just going super fast and my brain's just amusing itself.
Mayyybe…
Maybe I'm thinking all this for a reason! Maybe this time is given to me so I can sort things out! Maybe- -
"Kuki!"
"Mom?" Kuki tried opening her eyes, but she couldn't.
"Yes, Kuki, I'm right here. Are you all right?"
"Mmph…" Kuki felt like pulling the blankets over her head and going back to sleep. "What happened to me, mom? Where am I?"
"You're at home, Kuki. A nice boy from down the street brought you here. Said you had just passed out on the floor."
"Mom, I can't open my eyes. What's wrong with me?"
"You're just tired, dear. Get some rest."
Suddenly Kuki found the strength to sit up. She opened her eyes. She was in her room. Just when she was about to object on her mother being so you-are-tired-and-you-need-rest-y, She smelled something.
Snif. Snif.
"Mmmm… what smells like chocolate?"
Her mom smiled. "Hot cocoa, dear." She handed a funny Garfield mug to Kuki, who brought it to her lips.
"Hmmmmm…"
Her mom stood up to go. "Come downstairs, Daddy's making dinner."
"Wait, mom!"
"Yes, Kuki-Chan?"
"Where's Mushi? How long have I been out?"
"Mushi's coming in a minute, she's still playing at the… what's their name…?"
"The Gilligans?"
Gengkei looked thoughtful for a moment.
"Mom? What's wrong?"
"…Nothing, nothing. Anyways, you've been unconscious for 2 hours. Take a shower, Kuki-Chan. It will help you feel better." Her mother kissed the top of Kuki's head and left.
Kuki sipped the chocolaty goodness until it was done. She gathered the things she'd need for the shower: two towels (one for her hair, and one for her body), bath gel, lotion, shampoo…
She didn't have to look for the bathroom; in fact, she knew exactly where it was. It was a fun bathroom. Her parents (or the former owners) had decorated it completely in a cow/meadow theme. The floor was tiled with big, square, black and white tiles, and the walls where tiled white with an occasional black splotch. There was a black counter with white drawers, and on top of it was the sink, which actually looked like a glass bowl. The mirror was simple, oval, with a black rim. There where cow-splotched carpets on the floor that your feet just sank into. There were Swiss looking scenes of cows grazing in green meadows hanging on the walls, and a funny little man who wheeled his unicycle whenever you took a piece of toilet paper.
Kuki placed her towels on the toilet seat (with the top down) and put the shampoos, conditioners and soaps in the shower, and got in herself. The water felt warm and refreshing, and it made Kuki feel up to anything.
"Hello?"
Hoagie looked up from his Algebra homework. His mom had just picked up the phone.
"Why hello, Mrs. Sanban!"
Ahhh… so that's what it was.
"She's ok? Aha. Ok, good! Alright. Thanks for calling. Ok. Goodbye… Gengkei."
Click."She's ok, Hoagie."
"Ok, good." He was quiet, but he didn't continue his homework.
"Hoagie, what's wrong?"
"I dunno, mom. I just… feel like I've seen that girl before…"
Flashback
"Oh, would you just drop it numbuh Two!"End Flashback
"Maybe you have." His mom placed a chubby hand on his shoulder.
"She said she used to live here, but she moved away when she was 12."
"Then you must have seen her before! I talked to her mom, she said she went to Cleveland Elementary, just like you."
"Yeah…" He tried concentrating on his homework, but failed.
"… Mom? Do you know why she just fainted like that?"
"Like what?"
"She just stood there for a while, staring at the dining room." Hoagie remembered. "Her eyes looked kinda glazed over, and soon she started rolling her eyes and leaning against the wall, as if she couldn't support herself. I grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her, but she didn't snap out of it!" He looked at his mom, worried. "What did I do wrong?"
"Hoagie! Don't worry. You didn't do anything wrong. It was good that you shook her. Go on, tell me the rest."
"Well, she just stood there and started wavering, and the minute I let go of her shoulders, she closed her eyes tightly and screamed," He stared at his notebook. "Then she fell on the floor."
Mrs. Gilligan sighed.
"Well, Hoagie, I know I shouldn't- -"
"Mom! Finished my homework!" Tommy ran in the kitchen, waving a black notebook with 'the Tommy' written on it in white out.
"That's nice, Tom, please put it in your backpack right away, or you might forget it."
"Ok, mom… hey, what's with Hoagie?"
"I guess I'm kinda confused about Kuki, that's all…"
Tommy grinned evilly. "Ooooo… Hoagie's got a girlfriend, Hoagie's got a girlfriend!"
"Shut it, Tommy!" Hoagie got up angrily.
"Hoagie and Kuki, sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S- -"
"Tommy, it's not like you didn't just invite her to play in your room!"
"Yeah, but that's different, I'm not fretting over her like I'm in lo-o-o-ve…" the little boy stood at a safe distance away from his brother and started making kissing noises.
Hoagie lost it. If his mom didn't immediately scold them both, Tommy would have been in pain within 5 seconds.
"Hoagie! Tommy! What do you two think you're doing!" She yelled. Both of her sons immediately started to yell at her and at each other. "Quiet! Do you two have any idea of how ashamed your father would be of you!"
They shut up.
"Tommy, do not make fun of your brother like that anymore!" She switched her gaze to Hoagie. "And don't even think of hurting your brother! Neither of you will fight in this house! Understood?"
Hoagie and Tommy nodded, eyes on the floor.
"Now both of you, to your rooms. If you have finished your homework, you can study." The boys gathered their school supplies and trudged up the stairs. "I'll call you when dinner's ready."
Hoagie's room: dark, now that it was evening. The floor was wood herringbone panelling, and the walls where white. Shelves filled with model airplanes hung above his full-sized bed. The carpet was light blue, matching his bed covers. He sat on his swivel chair, turning around in circles. He had finished his math homework. He was sitting in front of his wooden desk, trying to concentrate on the jumble of integers in front of him. He had only had math homework, so he only took his math books home from school.
He tried studying. He had read through his book twice, and had read through his math notebook three times. He just couldn't concentrate.
He stood up; stretched. He walked over to his bookcase, which was filled with Flight Simulator handbooks and other piloting books, and scrapbooks with pictures and sayings of his father that his mom had put together for him. He reached up and grabbed an old-looking photo album that he kept all the way on top of the bookcase, where his short mom and brother couldn't reach. Sometimes being this tall was handy.
He rolled some weights off of a recliner and sat down. He blew dust off of the album; he hadn't looked at this for a while. Either that, or he never dusted his room. Probably the latter.
"Ahhh… "
She was pretty. She was pasted all over the album, all the pages where filled with old school photos of her. Seventh grade, eighth grade… he went through it quickly.
There it is. Ninth grade. He stared at the class picture. He remembered that day so well. It was a bright fall day, red and golden leaves where falling from the trees in happy spirals, and the wind picked them up gently and swirled them all over the playground.
The rest of the school was in class; only the ninth graders got to go out. Everyone was dressed as coolly as possible because it was picture day.
Hoagie got to stand beside her.
She was almost as tall as Hoagie was!
She was dressed a lot prettier than usual; her hair, which was usually in a tight, long braid, was flowing in gentle waves to her waist and she wasn't wearing her hat. He knew that she probably resented the fact of having to wear a dress. Somehow.
He had never talked to her. Well, not recently. He thought he had talked to her long ago, but he doubted it. She was too beautiful. The day the picture was taken she was wearing a short dress, it came to a little above her knee. It was burgundy, with white stripes running along the sides and her usual white shoes. She wore pretty but natural makeup, gold bracelets and gold hoop earrings.
Her dark skin looked so flawless and so soft, he wanted to touch it so badly. Once her arm brushed lightly against his. He felt like he was melting inside.
He couldn't tear his eyes away from that picture, the whole class looked goofy around her. She was smiling a dazzling white smile, her head cocked a little and her eyebrows a little uneven. He loved everything about her; she was the most beautiful, the coolest, and the funniest ever. He had known her for a long time. He remembered when they where little that they had met.
… If only she would think of me the way I think of her…
That wasn't likely, he would always think. He did a lot of exercises every three days, but he was still a little lanky. He had so many freckles, and he wore glasses. They were tinted yellow, but still he thought he looked so dorky.
"Hoagie! Tommy! Dinnertime!"
"Coming mom!" He closed the album and put it away.
"Goodbye… Abby…"