First Day at Work

The year 8 class, 8ME, was in their classroom creating the usual havoc they always did. Ben Thomas was being chased by Ben Turner while Bertie and Omar played a game of volleyball with a small piece of balled paper. Scott Reid and Scott Bamford threw bits of rubber at each other and ran from Osman who wielded a dangerously stretchy elastic band, which was always considered a lethal weapon. The shouts, laughter and screaming rang out cheerfully and seeped through the classroom door. Fortunately, other teachers couldn't hear and thought there was someone supervising the class. Sarah, Kirstie and Samantha were engaged in deep conversation about Daniel Radcliff and how ugly he was, much to Sarah and Manaal's dismay.

"I'm telling," Kirstie repeated "He is ugly."

"No he is not!" Sarah protested.

"AND you like Orlando Bloom!" Samantha sneered.

"Yeah, I can't believe you made that picture of him…" Sarah sulked.

"Oh, you mean the one with 'poof' and 'stupid' doodled all over?"

"Yes."

"Well I don't like Orlando Bloom, but Daniel is like so cute." Manaal entered the conversation.

Samantha and Kirstie were best friends, even though they punched, slapped and hurt each other all the time. The two ignored Sarah arguing with Manaal about Orlando Bloom.

Kirstie ducked as a paper plane zoomed over her "I wonder who our new form teacher is going to be."

"Yeah. Probably an old wrinkly, bald guy." Sam replied, bored stupid.

"At least we're missing Geography, the registration bell has already gone."

Sam sighed "I do hope Mr. Evans gets better in hospital quickly so he can come back and save us from the new guy."

"Who said it was a guy?"

Sam didn't reply. A water bottle rolled near her. She looked at it and smiled evilly. She grabbed it, untwisted the cap, and rolled back down the row of desks. Water spewed everywhere until it hit Stuart and soaked him. She laughed along with Kirstie.

"You really hate him, don't you?"

Sam nodded "Yeah, after what the asshole says to me, he still deserves far worse." She paused "I got an idea."

"Uh-oh, what is it now? I don't really think I wanna know." Kirstie said.

"Why don't we use a substitute teacher to our advantage?"

Kirstie laughed "That sounds dodgy!"

Sam slapped her "No, you sick minded person! Like, what I mean is, scare the crap outta them so we won't be forced to do work. We can work on it all the time, since this new teacher is going to have to take every lesson with us because all the others refuse and are afraid and want to dump the work load on the new guy, the next few weeks should be work free!"

Meanwhile, Vyvyan entered the school and sat opposite the senior school principal's desk. He twiddled with a long knife against the tip of his thumb as he waited for the principal to arrive. He heard a noise from the door and quickly hid the dagger in his large supply bag (thingy).

"Hello, Mr. Basterd." The principal (Dr. Sola) strode over and shook hands with Vyvyan, slightly grimacing at the smell, which lingered around him. He sat opposite Vyvyan "So," he began, shuffling papers "You have signed up for this job."

Vyvyan paused in order to think but finally replied with a scarily enthusiastic grin "…… Yeah."

"There is no need for an interview, so if you could please sign these forums." He replied, unsure of what horror he was bestowing upon his school. He pushed some papers across his desk towards Vyvyan and handed him a pen.

Vyvyan snatched the pen and drew a very messy and sludgy "X" on every line he was to sign "There ya go." He mumbled when he finished. He wiped the pen marks from his hand onto the paper, then handed back.

"Um… Yes. Thank you. Now if you would kindly make your way towards E14."

Vyvyan stood "What's that?"

"It's a classroom, just follow the other numbered classrooms and you will find your way."

Vyv nodded, grabbed his bag roughly, knocking over items on the desk, and carelessly walking out. However, his bag got stuck length ways in the doorframe. He tugged and tugged until it finally came loose, taking some of the door with it.

He trudged down some stairs… Many stairs. He saw the back entrance to the staff room as he past.

The school was built on a very steep hill and many stairs were built. Although, up to the music room, it was a complete hill, which was very large and kids had to struggle up it everyday. Vyvyan was relieved he was only going down.

He came to very wide, grey steps that were bigger then the polished ones by the staff room. Down another mini-flight of stairs… And… There was a series of science labs that ran around a corner, and another flight of stairs leading up and onto… Another flight of stairs.

In false hope, Vyvyan looked at the numbers on the science lab doors… Nope, only decreasing in number. He'd have to go up top. With a heavy aggravated sigh, he slowly made his way up both flights… And there it was… The door marked E14.

"So then I said… As if!" Sam went on.

"Look, Sam, shut up." Kirstie moaned.

Sam smiled "Make me." Her voice changed into an impression of Stitch's voice from Lilo and Stitch.

Kirstie let out a groan "No, not that stupid thing again."

"Okay, okay." Sam comforted her, changing her voice back "I know how much you hate it. I am just so incredibly bored that the only alternative way to keep me sane, apart from going to kick Stuart in the nuts, is to wind you up."

"There's some guy coming up the stairs." Omar announced with concern "Quick, Scott,"

Both replied "Yeah?"

"No, mini-Scott."

"Oh, yeah?"

"You keep an eye on him for us. Since, you're small you won't be seen." Omar said to Scott who nodded. Omar then turned to the rest of the class "Everyone, clean up and back in your seats!"

There was a huge scramble, students falling over each other while picking up all the rubbish and paper that was scattered on the floor. Soon, everyone sat still, either reading a book, or poking their neighbours.

Scott stood at the window, just managing to see over the top "The new teacher's a guy, has red hair…"

Kirstie laughed and turned to Sarah "Sounds like that Ronald Weasley guy you like form Harry Potter!"

"Shut up." Came her blank reply.

"That's all I can see, the rain from last night has fogged up the glass." Scott said, sliding under the tables to his seat next to Scott.

The class waited quietly, staring at the door, anxious to see there new teacher. The handle turned… The door-

"Bloody thing. Why won't this door open!" a voice could be heard outside. Sam and Kirstie turned to each other and shrugged.

Finally, though, the door swung open, banging on the wall. Vyvyan stepped in and looked around. The many faces looked back, wondering how on Earth there school brought such a blasphemy upon it. Vyvyan gulped… Bollocks

If summink is in italics it's a thought, okay? Just incase u thought the class was saying bollocks or Vyvyan was saying it out loud… okay! R&R!