Disclaimer TEEN TITANS and all other related characters and material are the property of DC comics and Cartoon Network, I claim no ownership.

Chapter 6: Love Wants Us Dead

By: Ansa

Beast Boy returned inside, soaking wet from a combination of tears and rain. Slowly he shut the door behind him and leaned back against it and stared up at the ceiling. He felt so damn guilty, how could he let such a thing happen. How could he let her…What was he going to do? Should he be open and honest? No, that wouldn't be fair to Raven. For once, it seems the lie was better than the truth…that is, if she didn't already know. Looking down he scanned the room and found his fiancé sitting on the couch quietly, here eyes focused on his.

"I take it…it didn't go well?" She spoke calmly, with very little hint of emotion. Whether she saw what happened or not, she wasn't giving much to go on. Her hands were calmly placed in her lap, and her eyes gave no sign of anger. She was beautiful as always, but when he looked at her…now, all he could feel was an immense swelling of guilt eating away at his heart.

"…No…she…" He wanted so desperately to tell her, he felt she needed to know. Even though such a thing would kill her, he knew it would be better, he knew…no…why trouble her with this? Why must she suffer because of his mistake, why must this angel cry for him? He shook his head clear, he had to tell her. He couldn't lie to her, he had to tell her the truth. What would happen if she found out later on and he had not told her? What then? Would it be any better if he told her? His head spun as back and forth the issues went through his mind. "…She…" he sighed and fell back against the wall, "I told her she wasn't to come back her…ever." He figured he would start with the easier issues first, deal with the rest when they came up. When he looked at her, he saw a look of surprise on her face. For all the years she had known him, she would never have conceived him saying such a thing to anyone, no matter what they had done.

"What? Was it really so bad that…I mean, what happened that was so bad as to send her off like that?" She almost slipped, but quickly she caught herself. She knew what they had discussed, but when they left the room she could not bring herself to open the door…not after what she had heard him say.

"She…" Beast Boy took a deep breath, darting away his eyes from hers, it would hurt too much already to say this. If he had to look into her eyes…it would be unbearable. "…She…kissed me." He let it out with a large exhale, it was finally out. No more pondering truth over lies, it was done, and all that could be done was to see what came of it. A cold wave of dread washed over Raven as she stood there, her eyes widening and lips trembling. Quickly she pulled herself together, or at least tried.

"And…you let her?" In her attempts to gain control her dread only turned to jealousy. Her eyebrows formed a scowl as she moved so their eyes met her voice strong and growing in tone. Never before had she experienced such a feeling, it was all new to her…and taking control.

"What? No, I didn't let her!"

"If you didn't let her then how did it happen?" She leaned in closer, her arms rigid at her sides, fists clenched. Her mind was just a jealous haze now, she wasn't thinking logically, or clearly at all. Where she might have taken a situation like this calmly at any other time now was quite different. This was her fiancé, her man, and no one else's. Meanwhile Beast Boy was trying to back through the wall, not sure what to say or do. He had done this to himself; he deserved anything she had to dish out at this point. But that is not to say he wouldn't try and explain things to her, try to smooth things over, if at all possible.

"I don't know, we were talking and it just sort of happened…I tried to get away when it happened." Raven glared at him as he said this, tears starting to form in the corner of her eyes, her voice still loud, but now trembling.

"And what were you talking about that made her kiss you?" This hit Beast Boy like a blow to the head. There was no way he could answer this question, and nothing could make him or change his mind. This was it, the end of the road. He was face to face with wrath, his sins about to be punished.

Raven looked at him in his silence, her scowl fading to a look of pure agony. She desperately wanted him to say something, anything at all to dispel her jealousy. But he didn't, not a single word was spoken. Instead he just stood there, in all his shame. How could he…how dare he? As her tears streaked down the snowy hills of her cheeks Beast Boy felt the sharp sting of her hand as it whipped around and struck him hard on the cheek. The flesh grew red and hot, leaving a mark that vaguely resembled a palm. He didn't know what hurt more, the fact that had hurt her so much as to have her hit him…or the fact that could have prevented this. If only…if only he had been stronger, if he had just let Terra go…

He fell back against the wall and slowly slid down to sit on the floor, Raven fleeing to the bedroom and slamming the door behind her. Beast Boy held his head, his knees up to his chest. Why he did this he didn't know. Maybe it was because his head was spinning, his whole world crashing in around him…or maybe, it was to drown out the quiet sobs coming from behind the door.

Terra winced slightly at the slight sting of icy cold metal against her hand as she maneuvered herself over the railing, balancing herself upon the edge of the bridge. Looking down she watched as her tears rolled off her cheeks and fell down over the edge, plunging down at the river below. Her entire body shook, whether it was because of the cold against both hands now…or the fact that in a few moments she would no longer have to worry about hurting anyone anymore. A quick jump, a hard splash and all she had to do was let herself sink into oblivion. It seemed all too easy…so why was she trembling? She had caused so much sorrow, it seems no matter what she did she hurt people.

The tears mixed in with the rain and wind, chilling her entire body to the bone. She closed her eyes tight, trying to shake her own self loathing and attempt rational thought. As soon as her lids joined the image of her forcing herself on her once-time friend…her engaged once-time friend lit up, as if burned on the inside of her eyes. She shook her head and opened her eyes, hoping the image would fade. Nothing seemed to work, no matter what she did, that sinful image would not let her be. Leaning forward she wept aloud, the rain pouring down harder, the wind gusting behind her, as if the entire world was urging her on.

"Beast Boy…Raven…I'm so sorry, I won't cause you any more pain." She choked on a sob, straightening herself up and letting go of the rails, letting her balance be her only support. "I won't cause anyone any more pain…That's one promise, I know I can keep." With that, she closed her eyes and let herself tip over, her feet slowly sliding off the concrete edge and with that, she started the plunge towards the oblivion.

She closed her eyes and awaited it, that sharp stop that would most likely knock her out cold and allow her to drown without any effort on her part. Her hair fell back as she cut through the air, her body twisting in the air so that she was moving head-first towards the water. She could feel the sting of rain drops against her skin as she feel, the speed at which she was falling making them pelt against her skin hard. It didn't matter, not anymore. Soon, she will feel nothing…nothing but the cold embrace of death. And that…was the first thing to comfort her in such a long time.

She cried at this, a mixture of shame and that strange feeling of joy, the joy in knowing that it would end soon for her. She opened her eyes just in time to see the water crash around her. It was cold, and hard. The impact rocked her body so that she nearly passed out, but not yet, she would not be allowed release so quickly would she? She sank; her eyes so very sore, almost on the verge of bleeding. The water crashed around her body and engulfed her, everything becoming so blurry. She could feel the massive amount of pain in her head and neck start to fade as she went numb, her head spinning. This was it, her eyesight was growing dark. Release…relief at last would be hers. She said goodbye to this world and the last thing she saw, a soft red blur she could only guess as a boat, rushing towards her.

Beast Boy woke up with the sun in his eyes and a stiff back. Sitting up from his slumped position he realized he had fallen asleep on his spot on the floor, still leaning against the wall. Looking around he noticed that everything was as it was; Raven had apparently not left her room yet. He sighed, last night's events came surging back through his mind and once again filled him with shame. Standing up with a slight wobble he checked the nearest clock and cursed. He had less than an hour before work…and there was so much he needed to say, so much he wanted to fix. He would skip the day if he had to, but something told him she would not let him. Something told him, it would be best to collect his thoughts and come home with something to start with. As of now, all he had was "I'm sorry," simple, and meaningless for such a large matter.

Moving quickly he grabbed a pair of greasies he had left in the laundry hamper from the day before, he didn't dare enter the bedroom for a fresh pair. After slipping them on he went to the kitchen, his eyes playing tag with the clock. Finally he had managed to make himself a meager breakfast as well as one for Raven, whom he knew had class soon after he left. Setting the plate down on the kitchen table he mustered all his courage and gently knocked on the bedroom door.

"Hun…I-I'm off to work…but I want to..." He corrected himself, "…we can talk when I get home…" even the corrected version didn't sound right to him. He wanted to talk, they needed to talk, but he only wanted to do so when she was ready. "I mean…if you're ready…" He grabbed the back of his head and cursed himself. He was such a damn fool. How could he not have seen it? It was Terra after all…damn her.

"T-There's breakfast for you on the table…have a good day at school…" He paused, hoping, praying for her to say something. The silence was hell on him; he would even take a curse, a chewing out, anything at this point. He waited, but none came, instead only silence. Taking a deep breath he took the keys off the wall and stuck them in his pocket, but there was one last thing he needed to do before he headed off for the day. He had done this everyday of their routine, and today would be no different. Even if he got no response again, he had to say it. "…I love you."

This time he waited a much shorter time for a response, for his own sake. Even though he expected it, no response to this would tear his heart apart. After a few moments he turned and started to leave, stopping only for a moment as his ears picked up a soft trembling voice from behind the door.

"…I…love you too."

Short one this time I know, but I like where I left it off so I'm ending it there. Sorry it's taking so long updating but work's hell and there is a lot of personal stuff getting in the way, stuff I won't get into for your sakes lol. Anywhoot, I'll try and update as quickly as I can. Try not to keep y'all in too much suspense over this little event. Later Days!

ANSA