Author: WhiteWolfCub
Genre: Drama/Angst
Category: Harry Potter
Warnings: Slash between Sirius/Remus, and Voldemort being weird.
Summary: Seventh year has begun and Remus comes back completely different. He is cold, distant, depressed, and uncaring. Something happened to him and the Marauders are determined

Notes: Okay, most didn't respond, but the ones who did said this one and any other story. So here I am, coming to bring into the world of the real angst. So, in the reviews I was very surprised that no one did that stupid "ew incest!" sort of thing. I am so proud of my grown up readers. (o)

Gaspeth! On with the story!

---Chapter Five---

Waking up did not come easy to Remus. His head was pounding and his stomach felt like they were doing impossible flip-flops. Opening his eyes, he noticed that no one was around his bedsides, happily greeting him into consciousness. Looking around he noticed he was in the hospital wing. Sitting up, Remus glanced at his surroundings, noticing that the hospital wing looked a little different; there was no one in sight.

Opening his mouth, Remus grabbed his throat, wincing at the burning pain he felt. Right, he still had no voice.

Getting up from the bed, he walked to the entryway, his hands lingering on the door handle.

He felt like he was in the situation before…but where? Realization seemed to hit Remus like a sack of bricks as the memories of the night before came crashing in on him. Shuddering he shook his head, swallowing hard. Opening the door he stepped out, looking around. Funny, this wasn't Hogwarts. Looking around his eyes fell on the courtyard, where a little house was sitting.

His mother's home.

How did I get here? He thought, walking over to look into the window. The cobwebs and blood made seeing through the window hard. But sure enough, he could see the crouching form of his mother, the woman shivering with fright and cold. Come to think of it, she caught the flu recently. Biting his lip he looked away, fingering his neck, finally taking notice that he had no collar on.

Then where was his brother.

Looking towards the house he noticed the back door was open and swinging carelessly, the breeze blowing inside. Funny, his father always kept it closed. He always wanted Remus to be near him.

"My boy, mylastsonfinallycametoseemebutI-Isoncamedon'tknowsay," his mother mumbled from the inside of the small house. "My boy."

Remus wished more than anything he could respond to her, so instead he smiled at her and went to the door, watching in amazement at how it opened. Reaching out his hand he held it out to her, hoping for those withered hands to take it. Her eyes looked at him, searching until her hand reached for his, only brushing her fingers over it.

She began to mumble again, pressing her cheek against his warm flesh. She was smiling, for all the years he had known her she never smiled. He couldn't help but grin back at her. She finally looked like the woman she was supposed to be, not some doll.

No, the only doll in the household was him.

Remus pulled back from her, the flash in her eyes almost making him go back. Shaking his head he stood up again, looking towards his home. Someone was standing there, looking at him from the doorway. Turning fully to see, he noticed it was him, when he was little. Another boy was standing next to him, holding onto his hand. They looked exactly alike.

"Remus, mama is out there again," the other boy said.

"Why does daddy put mommy out there anyway?" He was asking. The other boy laughed, tugging on the young Remus' sleeve. His young self was clutching a teddy bear to his chest, shaking his head.

"Come on Remus, are you scared?" The other was asking. Remus blinked at his young self, wondering what he was going to say. Then again, this felt like a distant memory all on its own.

"Papa will get angry," his young self whispered. The other was getting angry.

"He hurts us Remus; don't you want to run away from here?" His look alike was getting feverish. Young Remus looked at his teddy bear and then at his other.

"He said it was natural Romulus," Remus spoke. "He said that when we are good, we can come outside, and play together. He says he wants to watch us grow." Romulus was shaking his head, looking towards the little house the older Remus was standing in front of. His eyes were looking strait into his.

"Do you always believe what he says?" Romulus asked.

"I know what I want to do with my life Romulus," Remus said heatedly.

"You don't know what you want Remus!" Romulus yelled, shoving his little brother to the ground. "What will become of you when you finally have to make a choice? What will you chose!"

"Romulus…I don't have to make that choice yet," he squeaked, covering his face when Romulus went to hit him. The blow never came. Opening his eyes he noticed that his brother was frozen in place, looking down at him with blank eyes.

"Now that's what happens to free people," his fathers voice spoke. Both Remus' turned around to see their father standing in the doorway of the back door, smirking down at him. Young Remus looked back up at his brother, watching in horror as his brothers body crumbled to the ground, uselessly.

"Father w-what happened –why, what happened to him?" His young form choked.

"I killed him boy, that's what happened," his father laughed. "Now get up Remus John Lupin, I'm afraid your little adventure out here will give you the collar."

"But father!" He protested weakly, struggling a little when his father grabbed his upper arm, yanking him into the large arms. Remus reached out his hand, trying to stop his father, but the collar was clicked on. The older Remus glanced inside of the little house behind him to see his mother's wide, insane eyes. She was screaming for her boys.

The young Remus was carried back into the house, his bear and brother forgotten. Remus blinked back the tears, numb legs moving to where his brother was lying, face first in the dirt. Turning over his brother he frowned at the blank eyes. Shaking his head he straightened up, his head moving to where his mother was still screaming out in agony.

Closing his ears he noticed that he was fading. Panicking, Remus rubbed at himself, watching in horror when the process sped up. Looking up, he was met with another version of himself, except older, around thirteen.

He was in his room.

"Sirius is beautiful, Sirius is kind, Sirius IS love," the other was speaking to a sheet of paper. He was smiling. Remus blinked, looking at his younger form more closely, inspecting it. He was thinner, but was definitely lighter in attitude and personality. His other was looking down from the window, a frown coming to his face.

"Sirius is…out of my league," he sighed, defeated.

"Remus, are you dreaming again?" His father asked from behind him. Remus turned, looking slightly sad at the sight of him.

"Not very much papa," he said softly, giving a smile. His father came over, looking out the window where his younger self was previously looking. Remus looked at them both before glancing out the window himself. They were looking at a lump in the ground, where grass had completely covered. It was where his brother's body was laying.

"Why do you stare at that lump?" His father was asking.

"Because, it keeps calling to me, like something important is buried there, but I can't remember," young Remus said, not noticing the smirk on his fathers face.

"That is of no importance," his father said suddenly.

Silence, and then young Remus was speaking.

"If you say so," he replied.

Remus only had time to blink before he was waking up in front of Sirius.

---TBC---

This was beyond short I know, but I'm typing on another computer, so it had to be rushed.

Sorry! Review!

-WhiteWolfCub

---TBC---