Author's Note: Another one of my lost stories. A trifle, really.

Disclaimer: The characters and settings were created by Joss Whedon.

She messed up everything she touched. I don't want to be like that.

-- Willow, Dopplegangland

X X X X X

I woke up, sitting at a table in the library.

The old library, not the one they had at the new school.

I looked around – everything was in place, the lights were on, but no one was home. There was a computer in front of me. I pulled away from the chair—

And noticed I was wearing a pink, fuzzy sweater and a short, shapeless skirt with a floral pattern. "Well, look at me," I said. "I'm all fuzzy." I hadn't worn clothes
like these in years, and honestly it was making me uncomfortable to be wearing them now.

But if I took them off, I'd be naked. Not good to be naked in the middle of the library.

At least not without a good reason.

I looked around. Something had to be going on for me to be here. A time travel spell, some kind of alternate dimension . . .

Giles' office was fine. As was the cage, though the back exit was locked and the windows had bars on them. "This is weird," I said. Then I walked quickly over to
test the front doors. I couldn't get them open either. It was like someone was trying to keep me prisoner.

I paced for a few minutes and nothing happened. Well, screw this, I thought. I'm a witch; I can get out of this on my own.

First thing I did, I tried my telekinesis on the doors and the bars. Nothing happened; they didn't move, not an inch. A little pissed, I tried out the books on the shelves and they went flying off, all of them. Then I tried the doors again, and nothing.

Somebody really wanted to keep me in here. I waved another arm and the books all went back where they belonged. Then I had a thought and telekinetically made all the books fly against the windows and doors.

Who knows how long later, all I had was a pile of books and a headache. To no one in particular, I growled, "This is like a nightmare." And then it hit me – it
wasn't like a nightmare, it was a nightmare. As a witch, I knew that dreams meant things – whether they were prophetic, or something else.

So what would a dream of me being locked in the library mean?

I sat back down at the table and thought about it. The computer was on, and the screen read "Type in your password." It beeped at me, and I ignored it.

It beeped at me again. And again. Groaning, I shut the machine off.

Then I got it.

The library was the old me. I was stuck inside it, reading books, working on the computer, not able to go out and get in on the action, like I was with all the witchcraft. That's why I was here, with the computer on and all the books here, dressed like I was seventeen again.

I wasn't like that anymore. I was strong. I was powerful! And I was never going to be that, that nervous, shy little hacking redhead again.

And the doors shot open, and my clothes transformed. Soon I was dressed more like me. Leather pants, a reddish-black bustier . . . now THEY fit how I felt now. I
strode boldly out of the front door . . .

And suddenly found myself standing in front of the Bronze, with a chalkboard sign reading "K's Choice" out in front. This seemed familiar somehow . . .

I shoved the doors open and walked inside. Like with the library, the place was empty. I groaned, "I'm having a terrible night," as I looked around.

Then some mocking applause from a figure in the darkness. "Well, well, well . . . look who's come back to play." She walked out of the darkness and I easily
recognized vampire Willow.

"How come you're talking to me like we're friends?" I said suspiciously.

"Not friends," she said, smiling. "We're the same, you and I." Her vampire face came out. "Wanna be bad?"

"Wanna be bad?" I asked disbelievingly as I shook my head. I wasn't like her. "Leaving now."

"Not leaving," she said. "Look on the stage."

I looked, and Tara and Oz were both standing there, somehow.

"Can you tell?" Oz asked.

Tara shook her head. "No. Of course, I never met the vampire Willow –"

"I never met the woman she is now," Oz said. "There's no difference."

No difference? No difference? Of course there was a difference! I was alive, I had a soul! I told them as much.

"Alive we'll concede," Oz said.

"But soul?" Tara continued. "Would someone with a soul have done what they did to me? Lied, cheated, cast forget spells?

"And when I left she nearly cost me my life," Oz said. "She pulled back just in time. But now -- now she's messing up everything she touches. She didn't want to be like that. I seem to remember her saying that at some point."

"But she's not even thinking about that now," Tara said.

Oz shook his head. "No. All she's thinking is about how unfair this is. Even now she's planning to derat Amy."

Then vampire Willow waved her hand. "Bye now," she said.

And I woke up.

Alone at last.