Title: Come What May
Fandom: One Tree Hill/Supernatural
Genres: Angst, Romance, Crossover
Pairing: Dean/Peyton
Spoilers: One Tree Hill, "The Leaver's Dance"; Pre-Supernatural
Disclaimer: Unfortunately I don't 'em. Wouldn't be able to keep my hands to myself if I did. The title comes from the Air Supply song of the same name. Air Supply, Cynthia Weil and Tom Snow own the song.
Summary: This is how Dean and Peyton's love affair began. Prequel to Split Second. It isn't imperative that you read that to understand this, though.
Author's Notes: Takes place before the Supernatural pilot and at the beginning of the summer following One Tree Hill's The Leaver's Dance. In this realm Cassie never existed and Jake never came back. Plus, Sam's still at Stanford and Brooke's off in California.
Come What May: Chapter Five
As Dean sunk into Peyton's arms, his hands touching her face, fingertips grazing across her cheeks, the voice in his head decided to speak it's mind. His conscience willed him to stop, but he ignored it. He was content right here, melting into Peyton's embrace, losing himself in her warm mouth.
When he finally pulled away to catch his breath, he mustered breathlessly, "We really shouldn't be doing this."
"No, yeah," Peyton said before dragging his mouth down to meet hers once again.
He didn't rebuff her nor did he do anything to push her away. Tomorrow would be soon enough to contemplate this mistake, but now wasn't the time for it.
When they pulled apart sometime later, he fell down on his back beside her, letting out a deep breath. His body was on fire, every nerve ending electrically charged. How could she incite such strong feelings in him he'd probably never know. But he was enjoying the feeling while it lasted.
"Why'd you do it?"
Dean turned his head toward Peyton, meeting her green eyes unexpectedly. She was looking at him, gauging him for a reaction. What was he supposed to do? Did she want him to apologize for kissing her? God, he hoped not. "Kiss you, you mean?"
"Yeah… I mean, you've been spouting out the last few days how I'm too young for you and we can't start anything and then… then you do that." She was quick to add, "Not that I'm complaining because it was one hell of a kiss and I… I'll admit that I've wanted you to kiss me… it just kind of threw me off guard, you know?"
Dean sat forward, propping himself up on his elbows. "The opportunity presented itself and I don't know… I just threw caution to the wind. I had contemplated it. God knows I wanted to, but I had never intended on kissing you. As much as I wanted to doing that and then having to leave… I didn't want to hurt you in that way."
"I understand that, Dean, I do. So… thank you."
He couldn't suppress the bubble of laughter that escaped his lips. "Thank me? For what? All my intentions were blown out of the water."
"You wanted to respect me and protect me. Besides my dad Lucas has been the only guy with my best interests at heart."
Dean wanted to question that, but he remained silent as she stood up, then reached a hand out to help him to his feet.
Once they were standing, they stood facing one another for a long while, before Peyton pressed her lips to his once more. "Sorry," she whispered when she pulled away. "I had to do that."
"I'm not complaining."
She then grabbed his hand and they continued the night that had been intended just for skating.
Kirby had called Dean early Tuesday morning to let him know that the part for his car had arrived and that he hoped to have it up and running by the afternoon.
As much as he was ready to have his car back, Dean wasn't quite ready to leave Tree Hill. In fact, now he knew more than ever that he didn't want to leave.
He hadn't intended to act on his feelings for Peyton. It had just… it had just happened. Five days of flirtation had finally culminated in one fleeting, perfect moment--one moment in which age didn't matter nor did the cloud of his imminent departure.
Last night, none of that mattered.
Now, however, it did.
Tomorrow he was leaving. No ands, ifs or buts. Lead or no lead, he was out.
Extracting his phone from the pocket of his jeans, Dean held it in his palm, staring at it as he debated calling Peyton to cancel the plans that they had made the day before. He had no idea what the day would entail, but he was seriously angsting over it.
Dean rolled his eyes, grabbed his wallet and keys off the dresser and stalked toward the door to meet Peyton. It was too late to cancel on her and really he didn't want to anyway.
As he made his way toward the café, Dean thought back to the night before. He had feared that after their kiss that their night would be ruined, but it wasn't. Not in the least. In fact, it seemed to break the ice.
They'd been more playful with each other. There'd been lingering caresses and soft touches. He'd never touched a girl in a platonic way yet have it mean so much like it did with Peyton. The way he felt about her was the way he'd always wanted to feel… and it scared him.
It scared him more than any demon, ghost or vengeful spirit ever did.
They had kissed. Though, it didn't change anything. It didn't magically change their age or his obligations.
Their situation was still complicated and he was still leaving.
Why couldn't he keep his lips to himself?
Why? Why? Why?
It was a question that he'd been running through his mind since after he'd walked Peyton home from the skating arena. He knew why he just didn't know how.
How had he let things escalate? All the promises and dedications he'd made to himself over the last five days were meaningless.
Useless.
Did he have no self-control?
No. Apparently, he did not.
When he arrived at Karen's Café he noticed through the glass window that Peyton had arrived already and was sitting at the counter talking to Haley. He watched them from outside for a few minutes, wondering what they were talking about. It appeared to be a serious conversation. Their heads were bent together and he could tell even from outside that they were speaking in hushed tones.
Haley was the first to spot him as he walked through the door, touching Peyton's arm to alert her of his presence. Peyton turned in her chair to flash him a small smile as Haley swatted her with a dishtowel, whispering something in her ear. The wink directed at Peyton didn't go unnoticed, either.
What the hell was going on? Were they talking about him? Oh, God! They were!
They were… they were gossiping. About him and the kiss from the night before. Dean put his palm across his stomach. He was going to be sick!
Peyton turned around to face him. "Are you okay?"
"Huh?" Dean asked, snapping his eyes up to meet hers. "Yeah. I'm fine."
"You're early."
"I didn't think that was frowned upon," he said awkwardly, trying his best to keep any nervousness out of his voice.
"It's not," she answered quickly. With a side glance at Haley she said, "I'm just…." Peyton shook her head, waving it off, saying, "Nevermind. Doesn't matter."
"You're being a girl again," he reminded her as he leaned against the chair next to her.
"Yeah, sorry. I know how much you hate that," she said with a roll of her eyes as Haley looked from him to Peyton, muttering something under her breath as she walked away.
They shared a smile as he asked, "So we're having lunch here?"
Peyton shook her head. "No. We're picnicking at the lake," she told him as Haley reappeared, sliding a picnic basket onto the counter.
"Have fun!" Haley said as Peyton grabbed the basket in one hand and his hand in the other, pulling him toward the door.
Did she just say picnicking?
"So are we gonna talk about the elephant or what?"
Dean had been quiet and reserved all afternoon and if she had to guess she figured he was feeling guilty about having to leave. Either that or he was regretting having kissed her the night before. And she certainly didn't need to be entertaining those thoughts.
They'd been avoiding talking about Dean's impending departure from Tree Hill and she felt that they needed to address it. They had spent the last few days together and maybe she was being silly, but she felt that there was something between them.
Dean was running from something she just didn't who or what it was. They'd only known each other for five days so it was awfully flippant of her to expect him to just pour open his heart. Even she wasn't that naive.
She wouldn't come out and beg him to stay because that would be too much of a girly thing to do, but the truth of the matter was that she didn't want him to go. And just because she wanted him to stay, it was a surefire sign that he was already gone.
"No," Dean said, dismissing her need to talk about the fact that he was leaving Tree Hill once his car was repaired.
Peyton pushed herself up on her elbows. "Why not?"
"Because when I leave, Peyton… that's it." God, could he sound like a bigger prick? He should've spent the entire weekend holed up in his hotel room, but did he? No. He spent all of his waking hours with Peyton and plenty non-waking hours with her, too.
His mind drifted back to Sunday night. They had vegged out in front of the TV with movies and pizza. They had wrestled on the floor and he had stayed the night per her request. It was one of the single best nights of his life. When he'd woken Monday morning in Peyton's arms he didn't care about his car or the job he had to do. All he cared about was not moving from her embrace.
Last night alone was making it difficult for him to leave. He didn't want to leave her and he hated himself for becoming so attached to her. The fact that he'd surrendered and against his better judgment, kissed her was not to go unnoticed either.
"Dean…"
Dean sat up abruptly. "I can't stay in one place, Peyton. I can't make promises to come back because I'm not sure if I can. I have no idea where I'll be in from week to week." Dean shook his head as he told her, "And giving you false hope would be… it wouldn't be fair to either one of us. I don't want you to wait on me to come back and I don't want to be the guy that swept into town one summer and left with your heart."
"Well, this isn't just about you!" She spat out angrily. "What if I wanted you to be that guy? What if I wanted to wait?"
"Believe me, you don't want me to be that guy and you shouldn't have to wait for me, either. Besides that I don't want you to." He looked over at her, his tone softening. "This turned into the very thing that I didn't want it to. You have to understand, relationships are a causality in my family and in my work, Peyton. I don't want you to become another casualty."
Him, Sam… they could've died in the fire that claimed their mother's life. They didn't, but they could have. Dean refused to put Peyton's life in danger. Even if it meant living a life wondering what could have been, so be it. At least she'd be alive and safe.
"I knew what this was from the beginning, Dean. I wasn't expecting anything," she tried to reassure him.
"You may not have in the beginning, but you're expecting things now otherwise we wouldn't be having this conversation," he snapped.
"And that's so bad? To expect something? To want more?"
"For you? No. You're entitled to it. You've barely begun to see what the world has to offer, Peyton and you deserve to. But me? I can't expect anything. I've seen what's out there. I've loved and lost and I… I can't want more. Happily ever after is not in my future."
"You deserve to be happy just like everyone else."
He scoffed. He didn't get that luxury. As much as he wanted to be like everyone else, he wasn't. He knew things that not many other people knew and even if it killed him he would keep Peyton from knowing who he really was and what he really did. "That may be true, Peyton, but I'm not like everyone else. There are things about me and my life that you don't know about and you couldn't possibly understand."
"So tell me. Make me understand," she begged.
And boy, he was tempted. Dean had no doubt in his mind that Peyton would understand but he couldn't bring her into his messy life. Not now, not ever. "No," he said matter of factly. "I can't tell you, Peyton and this… whatever this is between us… it has to end here. We can't be together. I'm sorry."
Peyton had no argument. She didn't have the energy to. What could would it do her anyway? Dean had obviously made up his mind. "Me, too."
Silence fell between them as Peyton began to gather up the remnants of their picnic. When Dean tried to help her, she rebuffed his attempt, spatting, "I'm capable of doing this alone." Her words holding a double entendre, of course.
After Peyton refused his help, Dean pushed himself to his feet, moving a few feet away as he told Peyton, "I'm leaving tomorrow." Peyton slowed in her task, but didn't look at him. Really, he couldn't blame her for giving him the cold shoulder. "Kirby called this morning. My car will be ready this afternoon and I'll be leaving in the morning."
Dean watched as she stood up with the picnic basket in hand. "Guess this was our goodbye, now wasn't it?"
"So…," Haley said, hoping to pull some words out of Dean as he sat across from her, engrossed in his stack of newspapers.
"So…," Dean replied in return, turning a page without looking up from his task. Dean knew that Haley wanted to say something, or ask something, and he wasn't going to give into her that easily. He had work to do and he didn't have time to play mind games. If she had something to say, he wished that she would just spit it out already.
"So… when are you leaving?" she finally asked.
Dean's head snapped up. Boy, she didn't waste any time, did she? He eyed her for a second, then bent his head to refocus on hunting for his next lead. "I'm not sure."
"You're not sure?"
"I haven't decided yet."
"You haven't decided yet?"
Dean looked up at her, flashing her a tight smile as he focused his attention on her and whatever matter it was that she wanted to discuss. Though, he was pretty sure they would be discussing Peyton. They always did.
"Are you going to be repeating everything I say?"
Haley shook her head. "I just figured that once your car was fixed that you'd be hightailing it outta here. You weren't too keen on being here in the first place, if you remember."
"I remember just fine, thank you. Unfortunately I'm not sure where my job is taking me next so I'll probably be sticking around a few extra days." Dean wasn't prepared for the head whacking that he received. "What the hell did you do that for?" he asked, annoyed, as he smoothed his hand over his hair.
"For the way you treated Peyton, you big lug! Why'd you go and treat her… the way you treated her if you weren't leaving?"
"To make it easier on her when I do leave." It was a hare-brained excuse, but better to have a lame excuse than no excuse at all.
"She's used to the men in her life leaving her, Dean. You wouldn't be the first and you probably won't be the last," Haley told him as she pushed her chair away from the table, rising to her feet.
Dean followed suit. "Now, what is that supposed to mean?" he inquired, following Haley into the kitchen.
Once safely in the back, Haley spun around to face him. "Just that she's used to being left behind. It might kill her in the beginning but she gets used to it so if you're gonna go, then go. Don't stick around and make it harder on her."
"I care about her, Haley, that's why I… that's why I told her that I couldn't be with her… in… that… way." He stumbled over his words, barely believing himself.
"Lame ass excuse, Dean. Not to mention a freaking cop out. You're scared."
Dean couldn't help but snicker. He was not scared. He battled ghosts and ghouls, sent demons back to hell, but he was scared of his feelings for a seventeen year old girl from North Carolina?
The smirk on his face quickly disappeared.
He had to give it to Haley she was intuitive and a quick study.
He was. He was scared of his feelings for Peyton.
Fuck.
When'd his life turn into an episode of Days of Our Lives?
He remained calm and collected as he countered nonchalantly, "And if I am?"
Haley laughed. The boy was either delusional or just plainly in denial. "You are, Dean. There is no 'what if you are'. You are. Now the question is what are you gonna do about it? Are you just gonna flee town and not look back or are you going to fight for something that we both know you want but are too scared to go after?" She gave him a lingering leery look before she turned and left him standing alone in the kitchen.
As Dean watched her retreating figure, he wondered if he would ever make a conscious move that would make Haley happy. A few days before she was telling him not to start something that he couldn't finish and now that he had put the kibosh on any romantic entanglements with Peyton, she still wasn't happy.
What did he have to do? Give her a kidney?
Dean stormed out of the café and was on his way back to his hotel when his phone began chiming from his pocket. Stopping on the curb, he pulled it open barking, "WHAT?"
"Is that how you always answer the phone?" came the gruff, unmistakable voice.
"Dad?"
"You weren't even gonna say goodbye?"
Dean stalled his packing to turn around where Peyton was hovering in his doorway. Her hands were stuffed into the pockets of her blue jean skirt as she eyed him with curiosity and a hint of sadness.
"That was the plan," he said, continuing to roll up his clothes and stuff them into his bag. He was leaving earlier than intended, the need to bolt fresh after a phone call with his dad.
His dad was busy on a hunt in Wyoming and had passed along the news of three mysterious deaths at a bed and breakfast in Virginia. As always, John Winchester barked out his orders, only supplying Dean with the information he needed. He'd asked no questions, promising to be on the road for Virginia by dusk.
"I thought it'd be easier to just, you know… go."
"Well… I just wanted to see you before you left. I won't stay long, I promise. I don't want you to be under the impression that I'm expecting something from you…" When he turned to stare at her with wide eyes, having not expected her to throw his words back in his face, she continued, "… and I wanted to tell you…."
Dean stalled in his packing as he listened to her speak. He heard her sigh and realized that whatever she was going to say wasn't easy for her to vocalize.
"I just wanted to say good luck… and… and I'll miss you. I mean… I know we didn't know each other long and you probably think I'm just some random girl and you know, maybe I am… maybe I was just deluding myself into thinking that this could turn into something. But it can't. You know it. I know it. So I just came to tell to… to drive careful and that I'll …I'll be here if you ever decide to come back."
After a moment's hesitation, Dean turned around to tell her that he'd miss her too as well as a few other thoughts that had been running through his mind the last few days, but when he turned around she was already gone.
Dean threw his duffel into the trunk of his car, watching as the sun began to set. He stopped to stare at it, remembering the sunset that he and Peyton had watched together over the weekend. He had contemplated going to see her on his way out of town but knew that would only make a bad situation worse.
He was slamming his truck shut when he spotted Lucas and Haley making their way towards him. "Hey…," Haley said, as she stepped forward to touch his arm. "We just saw Peyton at the café."
"You gonna yell at me now?" Dean was waiting on a verbal sparring, but none came. Instead, she threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly.
"She's not the only one that doesn't want you to leave, you know."
Dean sighed. He hadn't realized just how close he'd gotten to everyone. "I know."
A moment later, Haley slipped from Dean's arms. "Crap, if I stay any longer I'm gonna cry and I really don't want to do that so I'm just gonna go," she said, stuffing a box from Karen's Café into his hands. "This is for you for on the road. I don't know where you're going but I'm sure it's a long trip and you'll need snacks."
"I make it a rule not to eat in my car."
"So break it. I made these so you better eat them."
"Strychnine wasn't one of your extra special ingredients, was it?"
Haley grinned, teasing, "Guess you'll have to eat them to make sure."
Dean looked at Lucas and just to break the ice said, "Oh, God, you're not gonna cry are you?"
"Hold me, Dean!" Lucas joked, choosing to shake hands with Dean rather than hug. It was, you know, the manly thing to do. "Drive careful, man."
"I will. Take care of her," Dean told Lucas as he slowly backed toward his car door. "And thanks for the treats, Hales."
Haley hiccupped hearing Dean use her nickname. She stood beside Lucas watching as Dean climbed into his car, poking his head out the window to wave to them as he drove away.
On his way out of town, Dean slowed to a stop outside of TRIC, debating whether or not to see Peyton one last time. The honking of horns made his decision for him, though. Pressing his foot to the gas pedal, he continued driving up the road, watching through the rear view mirror as Tree Hill disappeared behind him.