Authors Notes: I have... too many Ranma fanfic ideas. One idea, inspired by my growing knowledge of Urusei Yatsura, could be summed up simply as "what if Kasumi Tendo had been based on Lum's friend Benten?" Essentially, it's an AU where Kasumi, rather than becoming the Tendo surrogate mother, became a rebellious bosozoku. It evolved from there into a Ranma/Kasumi/Shampoo threeway series rewrite (because apparently I can't do mono-relationships with Ranma anymore), but I just haven't been able to devote the time to actually starting this fic, tentatively named "Heavenly Delinquent Kasumi-chan". But I had this idea for a oneshot set in that verse, so I decided to go for it; if nothing else, it can at least test the waters and see if people would like to see the full version come to be.
Bikes & Bentos
Kasumi moved silently and gracefully through the dark halls of her home, working her way towards the kitchen. Despite it still being dark outside, the lights were on in the kitchen, and she smiled softly at the sight of her youngest sister standing over the stove.
"Good morning, Akane. Already making breakfast?" Kasumi gently called as she stepped into the kitchen.
"Oh, Kasumi! You're up early," Akane chirped, looking up from the well-worn notebook of recipes passed down from their late mother and smiling at her eldest sibling.
"Don't bother with breakfast for me and Ranma; we're going out," Kasumi spoke over her shoulder, even as she went to the refrigerator and swung the door open.
'Now, where did I put those...ah!'
Akane's smile grew visibly more brittle at Kasumi's words.
"Oh. You're going on a date?" Akane asked slowly.
"Sure are," Kasumi declared happily, withdrawing a set of packed bento and closing the fridge door behind her.
"Will... that girl... be going with you?" Akane asked, trying to sound conversational, but looking like she'd just found a slug in her lettuce.
"I presume so. Depends on if she can catch us," Kasumi flippantly quipped in response.
'Not that I'd be complaining too much if she was a no-show; just me and Ranma, alone in the woods together...!'
Akane's expression visibly fell, before she heaved a mournful sigh and shook her head. "Honestly, I don't know how you can put up with her..."
"Chinese Amazon traditions... a third wheel beats fighting for our lives. Besides, she's got things going for her, too," Kasumi cheerfully noted.
"Like what?" the incredulous Akane spluttered.
"A right hook that can crack concrete, and a kiss that can blow your socks off, to name two," Kasumi chirpily responded.
"Kasumi!" Akane wailed in protest, her cheeks flaring bright red.
The eldest of the Tendo daughters simply laughed. "You are just too fun to tease, little sister...but your poor boyfriend is going to be very disappointed..."
Akane somehow managed to get even redder than that. "I'm not! We're not! Konatsu's not like that! Oh, honestly!"
She scowled as Kasumi simply laughed even harder at her distress.
"Get out of my kitchen! Go on, out, you delinquent!" she cried, grabbing a pot and brandishing it as if to throw it.
Kasumi simply smirked at her sister, even as she beat a quick retreat out the door into the garden.
"For such a nice girl, she's got such a bad temper..."
Kasumi flinched, then grabbed for the bentos she had almost dropped in her surprise. "Do you have to do that?!"
Ranma simply grinned at her, the fact he was hanging upside down from the eaves of the roof only enhancing the mischief in his expression. "You're cute when you're scared."
Despite the grin she was sporting, Kasumi huffed with feigned indignation. "You take that back! I am not cute!"
"C, U, T, E; that spells Kasumi!" Ranma sing-songed back to her.
And that was when Kasumi grabbed his head to steady it and planted a hard, fierce kiss right on his lips. She held the liplock for several long seconds, boldly thrusting her tongue through his startled mouth to teasingly caress Ranma's own tongue, before she broke the kiss as suddenly as she had initiated it.
"C-convinced of my bad girl creds yet?" she taunted, trying to hide the fact she was blushing faintly herself and also panting slightly. Still, she proudly noted that Ranma was definitely coming off the worst in that department.
The wide-eyed Saotome heir nodded slowly, then suddenly dropped from the eaves. Kasumi made to grab him, but he flipped nimbly around in mid-air and landed feet-first on the grass.
"S-so! We hitting the road or what?" Ranma asked, the blush on his cheeks and the waver in his voice undermining his attempt to appear confidently nonchalant.
Kasumi grinned, and then led the way through her family's garden, deliberately adding a little extra sashay to her hips as she walked. It only took a minute or two before they reached her personal addition to the Tendo household. It was, admittedly, little more than a glorified shack, but to Kasumi, it was the most special place on the grounds, because it was her space. Her father had the dojo, Akane had the kitchen, Nabiki had her room, and Kasumi had her bike shed.
With practiced ease, Kasumi pulled on her biking leathers and fixed on her helmet; it was true that some bosozoku shunned their use as a sign of toughness, but Kasumi had a word for them, and that word was idiot. She'd seen what happened if you came off your bike without a helmet at 100 miles per hour... no thank you! Once Ranma had pulled his own helmet on, they wheeled Kasumi's pride and joy out of its shed and through the doors to the street outside. Kasumi took the driver's seat, waited for Ranma to settle in behind her and wrap his arms around her waist, then gunned the engine and roared off into the darkness.
Behind her helmet, Kasumi gave a feral grin, leaning into the wind whipping past her body, feeling the engine pounding between her thighs. The world around her became a blur as she sped through the pre-dawn, and she shivered in delight. By all the kami, how she loved this! Best feeling in the world!
'...Well, best feeling next to a good fight... or a nice makeout session with my boyfriend,' she quietly giggled to herself at the mental amendment.
The sound of another bike engine rapidly approaching drew her away from such pleasant musings. Instinctively, she glanced over her shoulder, and smiled to herself as she recognized the approaching vehicle and its rider.
'There you are! Well, let's have some fun first, shall we? Catch me if you can!'
She purposefully waited for the other rider to draw level with her, nodding to them in acknowledgement. Then she gunned her own engine and tore away in a squeal of burning rubber, the wind slamming into her like a physical blow even through her biker's leathers. She could hear the roar of her rival's bike even over the thunder of her own engine, and gave a feral grin.
The two bikers tore through the sleepy streets like bats out of hell, weaving around any obstacles unfortunate enough to stand in their way. Kasumi had the edge in familiarity, allowing her to spot the shortcuts well in advance and use them to her advantage, but her rival made up for it in sheer craziness. Kasumi nearly lost control of her own bike when she made the mistake of glancing over and spotted her counterpart literally driving her bike along a nearby wall.
On and on they raced, and soon the urban sprawl of Nerima began to disappear behind them as they sped up into the neighboring hills. As dawn finally began to break over the dark horizon, the two bikes screeched to a halt in a scenic mountain overlook, tables for travelers to eat and relax at, set against a rear backdrop of lush forest and a gorgeous view of the lowlands and the rising sun to the front.
Stepping off her bike, Kasumi took off her helmet and shook out her long hair - one of her few traditionally feminine vanities - before giving her rival a cocky grin. "Not bad, China girl, but you got a way to go before you can beat me!"
Shampoo, taking an extra moment to brush out her flowing azure mane, returned the grin, her eyes gleaming with mischief and delight. "Airen Kasumi is too-too good on bike! Shampoo happy to learn from master... but Kasumi still have much to learn from Shampoo and Ranma, too!"
Wordlessly, the Chinese Amazon held up her clenched fist, and Kasumi wrapped her own wrist around Shampoo's in the traditional symbol of warrior brotherhood. Then Shampoo glanced past the eldest Tendo daughter and her face lit up.
"Airen!"
Kasumi blinked, and Shampoo was gone, the wind of her passage ruffling Kasumi's hair as the Chinese Amazon sped past her to seize Ranma by the waist in a passionate embrace, lifting him and twirling him around like something out of an old Western romance movie... not that Kasumi ever watched that kind of girly junk!
As the three laughing teens made their way to one of the tables set up for sightseers and sat down to eat the bentos that Kasumi had made, talking to each other about their plans for the day and enjoying the sunrise in each other's company, a simple thought flitted through Kasumi's subconscious.
'I never thought I'd say this... but I'm glad Daddy arranged my marriage to Ranma.'
Chapter End & Closing Notes
And so, for lack of any real talent at discerning the best ending point, we come to the end of this little oneshot. I hope you enjoyed this brief glimpse at the world of Heavenly Delinquent Kasumi-chan. For the curious, this oneshot would fit fairly late into that story's canon - around its equivalent of season 5-7.