Chapter 5: In which Douxie gets rejected
"So, you're up," Merlin commented as his apprentice opened the door. "About time. I've had to do all this work on my own. Now go get the crate of primary ores from the storeroom and return those books to their appropriate libraries."
But Douxie stood in the doorway, staring as though he'd never seen the workshop before. After receiving no reply, Merlin turned to see what he was doing. The younger wizard's eyes were busy roving the room, taking in every object in sight, especially those around the central table.
"Did you go deaf on awakening? You have work to do."
"You're trying to counteract the Jim's onyx shard with its polar opposite," Douxie guessed. "It won't work."
"Oh? And why might that be?" the white-haired wizard inquired, feigning rapt attention.
"Because the shard is embedded in his Amulet. It's feeding off your own magic even in a dormant state, which means it's changing." He grew more confident, adding, "It's no longer what it was when Jim was first attacked."
A slow-clap met these words. "Congratulations, Hisirdoux. I didn't determine that in the first few minutes after he was injured. Oh wait, yes I did, which is why I had no choice but to use an emeralding spell on him. What do you think I've been doing during your extended nap? Looking for polliwogs?"
He uttered a gruff noise and turned away, waving dismissively.
"But Master, I'm trying to tell you that using the opposite of an onyx won't help. You do that and it could aggravate Jim's condition," he insisted, placing his hands on the table. Then his gaze was drawn to the collected notes and sketches that lay scattered about.
"Thank you so much for that enlightening advice." Merlin rolled his eyes and forcefully turned Douxie around to face the stack of perhaps fifty books in the corner. "Now stop loafing about and do your job."
He punctuated the last word with a shove that sent Douxie reeling forward. Throwing one last irritated look at the old man who had turned his back on him once more, he gestured to levitate the pile and stalked out the door. Merlin watched out of the corner of his eye as the books trailed along after him without scattering or slipping out of the spell.
"At least there's been some improvement thanks to all this trouble. It's very likely that's the first time he's had control over that many objects at once."
Douxie continued to mutter to himself as he reorganized all the books in their appropriate rooms. Camelot had five different libraries in the main tower and he was tempted to abandon them all in one, yet he knew it was important to put them back so that they could be located when needed. But even as he did, the workshop's contents continued to drift through his mind. Yes, his master knew what he was doing, but Douxie was sure he could figure out what was missing. If only he had been able to see all Merlin's notes.
Archie met him in their room just as stars were beginning to wink in the sky.
"Not much of a welcome from Merlin, I take it?" the familiar asked when he saw Douxie's expression.
"Did I really expect anything more?" He paused to yawn and stretch, falling backward on his pallet. Even after a six-day sleep, he still needed more rest. "Please make sure I actually do wake up in the morning, Arch. If only… there was a way… to help Jim that… made Merlin notice…"
%*%
Rain poured down in teeming streams, leaking in two or three spots through the thatched roof where the bundles of layered straw had thinned or rotted. Henry Fletcher slammed the door then removed his dripping hood, slapping it down onto the table and upsetting the meager meal Douxie had set out for him.
For a week he'd only set the table for two, hoping Mum would get better. Now her place would remain empty forever. More than half of the estate's villeins had attended her funeral that day, for Alice had been a kind, soft-spoken sort… an endearing woman who was much more a listener than a talker. Even her naturally ill-tempered husband calmed when she opened her mouth, no matter what she had to say.
But she was gone, and what protection she'd been able to provide for Douxie was buried with her. He swallowed uncomfortably and rushed to right the food, but there would be no fixing the bread trencher and its topping of weak pottage. Before he could make the attempt, Henry gripped his arm. Eyes bloodshot and wild, he sneered at the boy.
"Give me one reason not to flay you alive for sending my wife to the grave," came a dangerous growl that stank of ale.
Douxie's mouth dropped open in shock at the accusation. The man suddenly rose up and towered over his son by a full three heads. A broken riding crop was in his hand, still wet from the rain. Henry had turned it around so that he held it by the wrong end and Douxie squirmed fearfully in that iron grip.
"She worked her fingers to the bone providing for you, hardly able to rest between chores. You didn't help one lick, did you?!"
The words ended in a roar that made Douxie cringe back. He'd always tried to help Mum in any way he could even though he wasn't very strong. Why would his father say something like this?
The thicker end of the riding crop struck him hard, snapping Douxie's head to one side. The sharp edge where it was split cut into his face. Ears ringing, he could hardly move as another solid strike sent him sprawling to the dirt floor. Blood ran down his chin and raw pain was just beginning to awaken when a well-worn boot connected with his stomach.
Curses and harsh, untrue words struck him just as hard as the kicks stealing breath from his lungs, making Douxie dizzy with confusion and denial. That odd feeling Mum warned him about was creeping up from his bones again, but he couldn't suppress it this time. The riding crop cut into his shoulders and back as he tried to huddle into a ball. Searing pain built up deep inside, feverish heat thrumming through his veins.
"I didn't kill Mum!" he screamed, releasing every splinter of anger and grief at once.
His father didn't shout or kick him again. All Douxie could feel was rain on his back. Then it struck him that he shouldn't be.
Lightning flashed overhead. He sat up and looked about, finding the entire house flattened, spread out from where he lay to the neighboring hovels, a few flakes of straw from the roofing coming down around him. Streaks of blue light ran along pieces of what had once been his home, drifting away even as he watched in petrified stupor.
New shouts came from the other houses and a crowd gathered. Henry was found among the rubble, wiping away a smear of blood on his forehead, but as some went to check on Douxie, the man ordered them back.
"Don't touch the little demon! He murdered his sainted mother and now he wants to do me in!" Those bloodshot eyes took on a more haunted gleam. "I always knew you were different. She knew. That's why… that must be why she always shielded you. And to show your gratitude you killed her!"
Mum's whispers from only a few weeks ago echoed in his ears… 'Never let anyone see your magic, my dear. Never. You must always keep it secret. If anyone found out you're a wizard, they would… you'll end up like the others. And I don't want to lose you too.'
What had he done? He couldn't remember how the house exploded or how his father got injured. But he hadn't ever hurt Mum. Not once!
Henry continued to spit and rant, but Douxie pushed to his feet and lurched into a run despite the pain that shrieked throughout his body with every movement. He was too scared to wait and see what side the onlookers would take. No one followed.
The dreadful feeling of loss and betrayal hardened into a mixture of bitterness. That man wasn't his father. Never again would he let anyone call him Hisirdoux Fletcher's-Son. He'd take his grandda's name. Maybe someone could help him find the Casperan clan if he just kept looking. No matter how long it took, he'd find his family.
The rain and darkness enveloped him in a cold, unwelcoming embrace…
%*%
Rain…
Douxie jolted awake with a gasp, drenched with sweat. A furry black head pushed up against his face with a purr. Barely suppressing a sob, he hugged his familiar. A comfort he needed desperately at the moment.
The two didn't speak. Archie could tell whatever had woken him was far too painful to discuss.
Pale light filtered in through the stained glass windows of Claire's room, casting a soft myriad of colors over the two people inside. She breathed in the scents of ancient books and settled dust, listening to Douxie describe the first steps to calling shadows. Over and over she tried to grasp that flicker of magic, but it remained stubbornly out of reach. After a few minutes she gave up with an embarrassed sigh.
"Sorry. It's just not working."
He watched her intently, trying to determine where her block might be. One hand reached up to tug at his collar which felt a bit too confining. He hadn't worn any clothes like this since the 1300s, but it was all he had until they could stop somewhere long enough to go to a washateria. At least they still fit and Merlin's long-lasting preservation spell had kept most everything in the castle intact. It wouldn't even be that bad if Toby didn't cover his mouth and snort with laughter every single time they were in the same room together.
"You did well emptying your thoughts, but now you need to focus on one emotion. That will help you," Douxie said to his student. "It's intertwined with magic. The more emotion, the stronger your magic will behave. Later you'll be able to access it no matter how you're feeling, but right now you're at the stage where emotion gives you strength, yet it can also carry you away if you don't find a way to make that power your own."
Claire looked down at her hands, letting them go limp. "I just wish I could use portals again."
She was surprised to hear Douxie chuckle. "You think that's what shadowmancy is all about? Believe me, Claire, shadow portals are convenient, but they're just the tip of the iceberg. You can also learn to use it the way I do mine. Shields, blasts, cloaking, illusion… In some ways the limit to magic lies in our imagination, not our abilities."
For the first time Claire looked excited. "Douxie, you really mean that?"
"Without a doubt."
"Then… maybe it's good that I lost the staff. I never would have looked any farther otherwise." She straightened, growing more confident. "I want to try making a portal."
The wizard stared at her skeptically. "Are you sure? You just got through saying—"
"Most of my experience has been with that part of shadow magic. I just get the feeling maybe if I can learn to use them again, everything else might come easier."
Though reluctant, Douxie showed her the proper form. Hands splayed out, Claire fully focused on the shadows and her emotional anchor… Jim. The knot inside unraveled and for the first time she consciously felt a sense of power coursing through her veins. A faint swirl of violet light formed near her fingertips, growing as she concentrated.
"Good, steady," Douxie encouraged, coming closer. "Remember, this is your magic. Don't let it control you."
The shifting light expanded. Claire was straining now, bending this force to her will. Her image of Jim wavered, his pained suddenly eyes boring into hers. The violet magic darkened, turning to pure shadow that churned faster, more erratically.
"Claire, don't be afraid. Stay true to yourself and the shadows will have no sway over you."
"Douxie, I can't stop!" she gasped, true panic beginning to creep in.
Before he could attempt anything, the well of shadows smothered her and vanished. Douxie was left grasping the empty space where she'd been standing a moment before. Terror gripped him.
"Oh, bloody balroths! What have I done?!"
The Shadow Realm welcomed her in, closing the door behind. Claire was left drifting in the strange half-light that seemed to have no source. Stones of every size flowed along invisible tides, a silent warning that this place was dangerous even when one kept vigilant. Pushing off against one rock, she nearly collided with another. The bizarre sensation of being underwater and yet able to breathe was almost enjoyable and she peered about in wonderment.
"I… I really did it!" Her elation withered. "But how do I get out?"
Claire made her way, wandering with aimless direction. Rounding a particularly large boulder, she saw Jim lying flat, still unconscious. It was such a shock that she stopped dead. Three eerie figures loomed over him. One was the knight that had attacked him before. The other two were strangers, one with a giant bird skull as a mask and the other wearing a threadbare black cloak and antlers. They each stretched out a hand and suddenly Jim thrashed with a muted cry.
She screamed his name and flew forward, but the image vanished and Claire was left alone once more. The emptiness was frightening and she wrapped arms around herself. There must be a way out somewhere!
Douxie's words came back to her, reminding her not to be afraid, to make the magic her own. Resolve washed over her features. She would not let herself be controlled. She was in charge! Thrusting out one hand, she fixed her mind on the bedroom in Camelot and pushed through.
Books flew everywhere and she heard a muffled grunt underneath her.
"Douxie?" she asked, getting off his back.
He winced and rubbed his shoulder, but all his attention was on her. "Are you alright?! I had no way to follow or make sure you hadn't been…"
"Thank you," the girl murmured shyly, self-conscious now that she was safe. "I almost let myself get lost in the shadows, but I remembered what you said earlier and… it helped pull me back."
He gave a sigh of relief. "I'd say that's more than enough for today."
"No, I can do more!" she insisted, resuming her cross-legged position. "Try me."
This time as she breathed, Claire searched for the pulse of magic and let her soul find it. The purple glow appeared around her hands more smoothly. Douxie couldn't keep back a smile as she only struggled a little to do the simple exercises she'd found impossible only a few minutes earlier. Calling an end to the lesson a while later, he assessed her as Claire gave up trying to stand up on rubbery legs.
"I think your primary talent lies in the portals. It's uncommon, but it's the key you needed to break back into your magic."
Claire's bright eyes met his, gleaming with triumph. "Thanks to you I can help Jim! I can enter the Shadow Realm and—"
Her expression changed so suddenly that Douxie knelt down to see if she was alright. Clasping her hands together and almost kneading them in distress, she spoke haltingly.
"When I was there… I saw something. Jim and that horrible knight and two others. They were hurting him." She grew worried. "What does it mean?"
"It was probably a vision. I've heard the Shadow Realm is a place of mystery and many of the things you may see are only possibilities. Shadow magic can stretch into the future, but you can't always trust it to tell you the whole truth."
Claire looked down, face hidden by her black and white bangs. "I wish I knew. If a glimpse of the future could somehow change it and save him, then…"
"I wouldn't," Douxie warned with a severity that surprised her. "Seeking out Foretellings is what drove many shadowmancers insane. They became obsessed with changing fate to the point that nothing else mattered. Don't go there."
"Are you saying I should just ignore this?"
She could see conflict warring within him as he strove to answer her, but his voice was unwavering. "Foretellings can be dangerous. They can affect your entire life if you let them. That doesn't mean you should pretend they don't exist, of course… but you have to bear in mind that even if you do use them to change the future, it may not change in the way you want either. Please trust that I know what I'm talking about, Claire."
The last was said in such a way that she could sense he knew something. And whatever it was, he did not feel ready to share it. So she gave a nod.
Within several days Claire could easily slip into the Shadow Realm and was able to make short jumps around the castle. Seeing that Merlin had spoken so roughly to her about shadow magic, she asked everyone to say nothing to him about it. Not that there was an opportunity since he kept to himself except when he needed them.
While Douxie had been in his ensorcelled sleep, Merlin had gone to several cities around the world. Scotland, Italy and northern China had all received a visit from the invisible Camelot that could easily cover a thousand miles a day. Even more if Merlin added his magic to the Heart of Avalon in order to speed them along.
Each time they stopped, the old wizard would take one or two people along to collect books from what he referred to as a reliquary. They had been uneventful trips for the most part, dedicated solely to going to a random house or shop, finding its magical entrance and then collecting what they needed before returning. The non-magic occupants were less than pleased at such intrusions, but Merlin had ways of keeping them out of the way while he went about his business.
Now, since there had been no niffin attacks in three days, he deemed it possibly safe to return to Arcadia and retrieve many of the volumes he'd been forced to leave behind in the bookstore. This time he stayed in the castle, sending Douxie along with Claire, Toby and Aaarrrgghh.
"Don't take any unnecessary risks," the old wizard warned as he handed over a list of the books he needed.
"Don't worry, Merlin," Claire said, having donned her armor once again. "This is our home. We'll be fine."
All four climbed into the airship and Douxie used his bracer to operate it. "Ha! Not as hard as the old man makes it look!"
Sundown several hours past already, they drifted above town. Douxie assured Claire that no one could see them now that Merlin had cast an aversion spell on the airship too, and they set down on the bookstore's roof without incident. The moment they stepped away, the vehicle appeared to vanish. Toby spent an entertaining half-minute taking his hand on and off of it to make it flicker in and out of his sight, but finally Aaarrrgghh picked him up and carried him over to the rooftop entrance.
"Think there's enough time for me to go see Nana and get my armor?" the portly teenager wondered as he clambered down the ladder. "When I called her to say we'd be stopping in Arcadia she promised to bake cookies."
"Merlin did say not to take any unnecessary risks," Douxie reminded him as he levitated his master's old packing trunk, "but if getting your armor isn't unnecessary, I don't see why not."
"Whoo-hoo! Cookies all around!" he cheered. Then the boy looked at the unharmed shop as he reached the bottom. "Hey, didn't this place get burned to the ground the last time we were here? I definitely remember all the blue fire and glowy monsters."
"On our way out Merlin cast a firebreak spell. He's always been a collector of knowledge and relics, so the destruction of this place would be impermissible to him." Douxie went over to a mangled collection of metal on the first floor and knelt down beside it, cringing a little. "Sorry, Angus. I can fix this! Just give me a minute…"
A half-crushed gauntlet moved, giving him what looked almost like a thumb's up. After selecting four runes on his bracer, a blue aura surrounded the pieces and bent them back into shape… mostly. The suit of armor certainly looked worse for wear, but it resumed its position by the front door and gave Douxie a nod.
Toby and Aaarrrgghh were little help in identifying or gathering the correct books, so Douxie told them to get their own errand done while he and Claire finished up. Once they had collected the last one, the wizard looked outside for the two other members of their team. They were nowhere to be seen. Maybe he had time.
"Well, that's everything on the list, but there's still plenty of room in there. Claire, why don't you throw anything else that looks interesting into the trunk and then shadow-jump it to the airship? I wanted to get a coffee before we head back. It's been too long since my last caffeine fix."
Claire laughed and shooed him out good-naturedly, then started flipping through the nearest books. It was only a block to the cafe. A few people sat inside, including a girl with a skintight shirt, a plaid miniskirt over tights, and devilishly attractive close-cropped hair dyed pink. She was busy with her tablet and sipping a latte. For a few moments Douxie prepared himself, then he entered, making the bell above the door jingle.
"Douxie, you missed two weeks of shifts!" the barista snapped.
Every patron's attention swiveled to him and the wizard tensed under that scrutiny, an embarrassed smile making him look even more awkward standing there. The one he'd come to see looked him up and down judgmentally and then turned back to her tablet.
"Yes, well, I—"
"You do realize you were fired a long time ago, right?"
"Ah. Doesn't surprise me all that much, honestly. But that's okay because I got another job. Kind of an apprenticeship, if you know what I mea—"
"Ten minutes to closing time, people," the barista announced as she began wiping down tables and handing out to-go boxes where needed.
Customers collected their belongings and left tips as they headed out. Douxie took a few steps over to the girl who was purposely ignoring him and started to speak, laying the accent on as thick as he could.
"Hey there, lovely!"
Her eyes flashed up at him, annoyance practically tangible. "You've got some nerve. I'm not even going to ask why you're wearing a Renn-faire costume. I said all I have to say to you the other day, Casperan."
His suave demeanor evaporated at once. "But you didn't even let me explain!"
Zoe snapped the tablet closed, put it in her beige sling bag and threw it on so that it hung diagonally across her chest. He tried not to stare as it emphasized that particular area of her anatomy, yet it was so distracting that she was already on her way out by the time he realized he'd momentarily forgotten what he was trying to say. Douxie had no choice but to follow, hoping she'd listen, but he had to skid to a stop as she shut the shop door in his face. Yanking it open, the wizard rushed to keep up with her overly quick pace.
"Zoe, please! I tried to keep our date. I really did!"
"You know, it's typical," she threw back, still not looking at him as she strode down the alley and onto the empty street at the other end. "You beg and whine for just one date—"
"I never did either one of those and you know it!" he protested.
"—then when I finally decide to give you a shot, you go and cancel. In the morning I went to work to find half the records on the right wall of the shop melted. Whatever party you were having at home leaked through that barrier. Again! My manager docked everyone's pay for a month to make up for the losses." Making an aggravated noise, she increased her pace even more. "Despite all my misgivings I chose to give you a second try. That's when you ghost me."
"Zoe, first of all the bookstore was attacked and I had to use a fire spell to escape, and second I was caught up in a magical sleep. I couldn't wake up for six full days!"
"Yeah, and I'm positive you have a bunch of witnesses who can corroborate that story." She rolled her eyes. "I went to the trouble of rearranging my work schedule and getting dressed up and—"
"You got dressed up for me?" he repeated with some surprise. "What did you wear?"
"Nothing you'll ever see now!" Zoe clapped out at him, pink hair swishing as she shook her head with a jerk. "Look, you're just not my type. The only thing we really have in common is that we can both use magic. That's not enough for me."
"But what is your type?"
"Why? So you can go and pretend to be what I want? Not happening. You had your chance. You blew it. Now get lost."
"Would you please slow down? Look, I know I messed up, but it's… surprisingly… dark…"
He trailed off, slowing to a standstill as he noticed that the all streetlights ahead were completely out. Then one just above them flickered and went black. More lights the way they'd come died, leaving them in a foreboding pool of darkness. Sensing something strange, the young hedge witch had come to a nervous halt too and backed closer to Douxie without fully realizing she did so.
"Zoe, you need to leave," he whispered, recognizing the ominous presence.
She suddenly turned on him with a glower. "Casperan, if this is some stupid scheme to 'save me' then you've got another thing coming! Specifically my fist in your face."
He ignored her words, hazel eyes scanning the area. A series of faint yellow glows and red speckles came into sight between the nearest buildings, revealing the sinuous, arching bodies of shadow mephits as they slunk forward. Both he and Zoe pressed even closer, now very much afraid.
A/N: I really wish Douxie had kept his outfit from Camelot. Smexy! In the "Wizards" intro it gives us a quick half-second image of him wearing it with the hood up (which looks amazing!) but he never actually does that in the show itself. And am I the only one who thinks Zoe should have at least noticed he was wearing something that wasn't his usual punk getup when he came striding into Hex Tech?
Speaking of which, if you catch a minor comment in that scene you can assume Zoe and Douxie were supposed to have a date the night "Wizards" took place and he canceled, ticking her off. The only other time we ever see them sort of together is during a cameo in "Luug's Day Out" - she's walking back into the record store after having just left Douxie who's watering the plants in front of his bookshop. But I wasn't happy with a relationship between them because from the little we're shown of Zoe, she struck me as proud and sarcastic (take into account her tired, derisive "How can I make your day 'magical', sir?" to Krel). Douxie has a grand total of one line to Zoe. Everything else in their encounter is him looking either abashed or intimidated (and that's irritating to no end if, like me, you really enjoy Douxie's character).
So my impression of Zoe is that she has more of a jaded personality and an inability to take others seriously, whereas Douxie is surprisingly optimistic and willing to throw himself completely into a situation for the sake of people he hardly knows because he has such a strong sense of justice and morality. Can they come to an understanding? You'll just have to wait and see.