"They look so good together," Penny commented, her eyes locked on the happy couple that were currently enjoying their first dance as husband and wife.

Gordon nodded in agreement. "They look happy." And they did. Selene always seemed to have a happy glow about her, one that only the direst of circumstances could dim, but now, seeing her wrapped tightly in his brother's arms, she was shining brighter than ever. Her eyes were locked on John's like he was the most important and amazing thing in her world. John leant closer to whisper something in her ear and she burst out laughing, the sound carrying over the music. John smiled at her reaction, fully focused on his wife, who at that moment in time was clearly the centre of his universe. It was nice to see.

If someone had asked Gordon which of his brothers he thought would get married first, he would have confidently said Virgil. Virgil was well known as the romantic brother with his poet's soul and sensitive artistic side, but John had come completely out of left field. Gordon didn't begrudge him his happiness, but he'd be lying if he didn't admit that he was jealous. Which honestly, shocked the hell out of him.

He'd never pictured himself getting married, he was far too much of a free spirit. He liked to have a good time, to live his life without having to worry too much about another person. Or so he'd told himself. But the truth was that he'd lived with his unrequited crush on Penelope for so long, that he still found it hard to believe that they were actually together.

He loved her desperately, something he'd known for a long time. He woke up wanting to see her, spent the day missing her and went to sleep wishing she was beside him. The time they spent together were his favourite moments yet so few and far between that he was determined to make the most of every second. He liked what they had, but he couldn't help wanting more. He told her frequently that he loved her, always ending a call with it or a text goodnight, but now that he was thinking about it, he couldn't recall a single time that she had said it back.

He knew that Penny was a totally different person to him and that people showed their love in different ways, and he respected that. But he needed to know. Penny was a very practical person, focused on her goals and sure of herself. She had never been one to go with the flow, she always needed a game plan, to know what her goal was and to do anything she could to achieve it.

And that, he realised, was part of the problem for him. They had never defined their relationship in any set way. They were together, dating exclusively, but that was about it. It wasn't that he doubted she cared about him but he wanted, no he needed, more than that. He wanted her to show him. He, the one who professed to be allergic to commitment in all forms, needed structure, he needed to know where they stood. He needed to know that she saw a future with him the same way he saw one with her. He needed to know that he meant as much to her as she did to him. He needed to know that he was a permanent part of her life, that he was involved with her game plan. He wanted to be there for her, to support her and help her achieve her goals in any way he could. And he wanted the same in return. He wanted undeniable proof that she was with him for the long haul.

He looked back at his brother, remembering the way that he had been earlier that day, waiting at the altar that had been erected on their beach. They had all been expecting John to be a bundle of nerves, especially being the centre of attention even if it was just family present. But he'd been fine, more than fine, impatient even, like he wanted nothing more than to make his claim on her official. There had been no hesitation from either of them, Selene had practically run down the makeshift aisle to his side, a mutual need to declare their love to each other and make it permanent.

The fact that this was technically their second wedding had been a surprise at first but then it was so typical of them that he would have been more surprised if they hadn't done it before. They were perfect for each other in the most obvious way, that much was clear. And he wanted the same himself.

He wanted someone to want to be with him forever, to walk towards him with no hesitation and pledge to love him until the day they died. Was it so wrong to want that? Was it old-fashioned to want to know for sure that the person you loved with all your heart loved you just as much in return? He didn't think so. If his brother could do it, then so could he. Seeing his brother so happy and settled with someone that knew everything about him, even the negative things, but loved him regardless, gave him hope. Hope that the one person he'd always wanted but never thought he was good enough for would be willing to take a chance on him in the same way.

"Would you ever want to do that?" he blurted out, taking the bull by the horns before he talked himself out of it.

"Do what?" She dragged her attention away from the bar area where Parker was fighting with Avery over a tray of glasses and back to the dance floor. "Dance? I'd love to."

"Sure, we can dance," he stuttered, trying to regain his composure after such a sudden swerve in conversation.

"I do so love this song," Penelope murmured, resting her head on his shoulder as she slid her arms around his middle.

"Me too," he answered distractedly as he pulled her closer. How could he have wimped out like that? This was the perfect time to broach the subject of their future and he'd fallen at the first hurdle.

"Is there something on your mind?" she asked, apparently adding mind reading to her list of secret agent skills.

This was it, his moment to be brave. She was staring at him, her eyes full of concern and he couldn't help himself.

"When I asked if you'd want to do that, I didn't mean dancing," he started. "I meant would you ever want to get married." There, he'd said it. There would be no taking it back now.

She was silent for a moment or two before she let out a little peel of laughter. Laughter that he didn't echo. Noticing his stony silence she abruptly sobered, stumbling over her next words. "Oh, oh you were being serious."

"Well, yeah. You don't bring up something like that as a joke. Do I take it that the idea of marrying me is so bad you have to laugh at it?" He tried to keep his tone light but he wasn't feeling it. Would he be such a terrible person to marry?

"Of course not," she assured him. "But really darling, let's not be silly now."

"Silly? What's silly about it?" He stopped dancing, grinding to a halt, unable to continue the charade.

"Really, Gordon, be sensible. I mean, we're hardly at that stage yet, are we? We've only been together for eighteen months." She moved her body a little more forcefully when he stayed resolutely still, trying to encourage him to continue their dance, not liking the thought that they might be drawing unwanted attention.

Gordon frowned, looking pointedly in the direction of his brother and sister-in-law. "They were together six months when John asked her to marry him and she said yes because she loved him."

"Clearly they were in a different place than we are," Penny laughed, bopping him on the nose. "I think we've got a little more polishing to do before we get to that point, don't you?"

She was smiling sweetly at him, like it wasn't that big a deal. He wanted to argue, he wanted to say everything that was on his mind, but it was his brother's wedding and making a scene wasn't an option.

"Gordon?"

She wanted an answer from him and it was up to him to give her one, even if he hated it.

"Sure, yeah, you're right, it was a silly idea."

-x-

"Have you seen Penny?"

Virgil paused in his conversation with Selene's uncle Pierce -father of Otis to his eternal shame- to sweep his eyes over the assembled crowd. Finally, he spotted her on the crowded dance floor.

"She's over there, dancing with Troy."

"She's what? Of all the people she could be dancing with, she picks that idiot?"

"I know, but don't make a scene, she's probably just being a good hostess."

Gordon looked over, locating the pair who looked a tad too cosy for his liking. His fists clenched without him even noticing.

"Gordon…" Virgil said, the warning clear in his voice as he spotted the way his brother had tensed up. He knew the set to his shoulders, the way his forearms bunched as his hands curled into a fist. Gordon rarely got angry but when he did he was explosive, detonating like a bomb that had the potential to take out everything in its path.

"I'm not going to do anything," Gordon promised, "I'm just going to go over there and reclaim my girlfriend."

Virgil's sigh was a thing of beauty, not believing him for a second. "Do you need me to come with you?" The meaning was clear, do I have to stop you from being an ass?

"Nah, I'm good, I'm chill, I got this."

"Sure you do… and he's gone."

Gordon was already moving, weaving his way through the dancers, detouring around the enthusiastically dancing…was that the stripper from John's bachelor party? No time for that now, focus, Gordon.

"Hey, mind if I cut in?" Gordon asked, tapping Troy on the shoulder.

Troy stiffened, his feet stilling as he turned to face his nemesis. "Oh, there you are, Tracy. I was wondering when you were going to stop being so rude and come over."

"Sorry, I was a little busy with my brother getting married."

"Yeah, to my cousin. I guess that kinda makes us family." Troy knew exactly what he was doing, his grin firmly in place as he pushed button after button.

"Yeah, I guess it does," Gordon answered, his words clipped as he struggled to control himself. He didn't know what it was about Troy that rubbed him up the wrong way but they had been at loggerheads from the moment Gordon had joined his crew as part of his WASP training.

"Gordon," Penny warned, her lips pursed, her expression clearly telling him that he needed to back down. "We'll just finish this dance, then I'll be with you."

Gordon raised an eyebrow at this. What the hell was she doing? She knew how much he and Troy disliked each other, yet here she was, fraternising with the enemy and appearing to be enjoying it.

Troy looked from one to the other, a little frown on his face, clearly assessing the situation. He knew he was missing something but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. No, it couldn't be… could it?

"Sorry, have you two got a thing going on?" he asked, pointing first at Gordon and then at Penny in disbelief.

"Yes," Gordon answered when Penelope just rolled her eyes. He knew that she hated to be demoted to nothing but a romantic partner, she preferred to be seen as her own person, which was one of the reasons that they hadn't gone public with their relationship yet, but seriously, was now really the time for her independent streak to make itself known?

Troy immediately stepped back, which was the only thing that kept Gordon from dragging him away from Penelope and taking him outside. That was until he opened his mouth again.

"Sorry, my man, really didn't mean anything by it."

"It's perfectly alright, Captain Tempest," Penelope assured him. "After all, two adults are permitted to dance together in a polite fashion at an event such as this without it being turned into something scandalous." She cut a sideways glare at Gordon, letting him know without words that she was royally pissed off with him for making a mountain out of what she barely considered a molehill.

"Sure, sure," Troy agreed, stepping aside with a bowing gesture to Gordon, clearly indicating that he was giving up all claim to his dance partner. He turned his attention back to Penelope, giving her one of his patented grins that could drop a woman's underwear at thirty paces. "I hope you won't blame a guy for not knowing and trying his luck. It's not like you have a ring on your finger and Tracy didn't seem like your type."

Ordinarily, Gordon would have found it amusing and laughed it off just as he had done many times before. He didn't have time for jealousy in his life. He was usually quite secure in his relationships and would just be proud that his woman was beautiful enough to be getting so much attention. It wasn't like this was the first time that someone had assumed Penny was single even when he was by her side. They hadn't gone public after all and Troy was right, he wasn't really her type.

He wanted to have faith in her and to be completely confident in each other the way that his dad and mom had been, the way John and Selene were. But tonight, tonight he wasn't sure of anything, not even himself. Tonight Troy's words hit home in a way that Gordon wasn't remotely prepared for and before he knew it the next thing to hit home was his fist against Troy's face.

"Gordon!" Penny shrieked, shocked to her core that he had just done that.

"What the fuck, Tracy?" Troy hollered, his words muffled where he'd cupped his hands protectively around his nose. Blood dropped from between his fingers but Gordon couldn't find it in himself to care. The man had been winding him up for years, and he'd finally snapped. He refused to feel bad about that.

"Gordon, just what on earth were you thinking?" Penelope demanded, her arm around Troy's shoulders as she started to guide him off the dance floor.

"I was thinking that he was being a disrespectful ass and I was sick of it!"

"The only one being disrespectful here is you," Penny shot back. "You're the one unable to control yourself and causing a scene."

Gordon stared after her in stunned disbelief as she walked Troy away to the kitchen with promises of ice and medical care should he need it. That was so typical of her, to blame him when it would never have happened if she had paid the slightest bit of attention to how he was feeling. Pathetic as it sounded he needed her support and reassurance and instead she had left him with more insecurities than ever before.

-x-

"Did you receive the little gift I sent you?"

"I did, yeah, Virgil fetched it on the last supply run."

"And I trust it arrived in one piece?"

"Yes, well, technically three pieces. I don't think I've ever owned a waistcoat before."

"Then it is high time that you did."

"Are you sure?" Uh oh, he shouldn't have said that. Penelope's eyes narrowed slightly, the effect somewhat lost since she was in hologram form and not there in person, but he still felt the heat of it scorching his skin.

"What do you mean by that? Of course I'm sure. Why? Is there something wrong with it?"

Her tone told him that he should tread carefully and be aware of exactly what he said, and how.

"No, it's great," he said, forcing a reassuring smile onto his face.

She crossed her arms, clearly not believing him.

"It's just…it's not really my style, is it?" he answered as honestly as he could, trying not to offend her.

"Well I should hope not," she said with a little tinkling laugh, her mood changing in an instant. "That suit is a custom Andre Verdain, not one of your cheap shirts."

Gordon glanced down at the shirt he was wearing, a blue and purple Hawaiian one with traditional Plumeria flowers scattered all over it. It had been a gift from Selene's brother on his birthday and it always smelled vaguely of Nag Champa no matter how many times he washed it. For some reason, he found it kinda comforting.

"What's wrong with my shirts? I happen to like them, they're comfortable and make me look cool."

Penelope let out a tiny, but still unladylike, snort of disbelief, one she quickly hid with a delicate cough. "You might think it looks cool," she started once she had regained her composure, "but they're hardly appropriate for the kind of events we attend. You needed something a little more mature."

"Are you trying to turn me into an adult?" he joked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Never, darling, I would have better luck trying to part Parker from his hideous leather jacket."

Gordon didn't know what to say to that, since he thought the jacket was quite stylish. Maybe she had a point after all.

"Will you at least try it on?" she wheedled. "For me? It would make me so happy."

"Sure," he sighed, knowing he was beaten. He just couldn't resist her.

"And then wear it to the conference on Saturday."

-x-

"Wow, look at you!" Scott said, whistling in appreciation as he caught sight of his brother slinking past the couch like he was trying to turn invisible with the power of his mind. "Hey, stop, come back. Let me look at you properly."

Gordon ground to a halt, looking like he wanted to do anything, even get eaten by sharks, other than parade around in front of his brother. Still, he dutifully stopped, spreading his arms wide as he twirled in a slow circle, resigned to the inspection.

"Come on then, get it over and done with," Gordon sighed. "I know I look ridiculous but if you can try to keep the teasing to a minimum, you'd be doing me a real solid."

Scott frowned, unsure if Gordon was joking or not. His eyes searched him from head to foot, looking for anything out of place, but his usually chaotically dressed brother looked perfect to him.

"Nothing to tease about, Squid. It looks great on you, very mature."

"Thanks, Penny got it for me," Gordon answered, tugging on the tie like it was strangling him. He didn't know why he was finding it so uncomfortable, he'd worn suits before, in fact, he had a rather nice collection if he did say so himself. This one was well cut, the material was soft, the lining felt like silk and the shoes didn't even pinch his toes. Yet he felt like he was the only one wearing a costume to a party.

"Well, she has good taste," Scott continued, still trying to improve Gordon's mood.

"Yeah, apparently so. She also sent me new shirts, pants, sports tops and shoes."

"Lucky you, do you think she'd get me some too?"

"Yeah, lucky me."

-x-

"There now, that's much better." Penelope stroked a freshly manicured hand down Gordon's lapel, smoothing it down where it had ruffled when he had hugged her. "It looks simply marvellous on you as I knew it would. A properly cut suit will do wonders for one's self-esteem and social standing, or so Daddy used to tell me."

"Thanks...I guess," Gordon stuttered, unsure of how to answer her. He'd never had self-esteem issues, he'd always been confident in how he looked and comfortable in what he chose to wear. But now a little nagging voice at the back of his mind was making him doubt himself. Was that why she had bought him new clothes? Not to be nice and support an independent designer as she had claimed, but because he embarrassed her when he was dressed in his own clothes? Did she not want to be seen with him?

"You guess?" She laughed, dismissing his answer as if it were nothing as she slid her arm through his, using her grip to steer him around a group of boring-looking scientists. "Now, remember not to make too many jokes, you don't want them to think you're insincere, and do try to keep your language more formal."

"When is my language not good enough?"

"Darling, you know you aren't the most eloquent of speakers and you do have a tendency to go somewhat off-topic."

What did she mean by that? He'd always thought that he was good at public speaking, he'd always been a confident person. He'd never been afraid to talk about almost any subject that came up in conversation, but when it came to his area of expertise he could talk for hours. He'd given more than a dozen talks at various functions and he'd always thought they had been well received. Sure, he'd never been one to stick to the boring lecturing side of things, but he hadn't thought that was a problem. The audience had always laughed along at the right times and asked him interesting questions that he never had trouble answering. He'd come along today, wearing his favourite squid tie, with a spring in his step and fun stories bubbling away in his brain as he mentally rehearsed what he would say. Now he was doubting if he should even be there.

"I do not go off-topic," he argued, trying valiantly to grab hold of his flagging confidence as the doubts caused by her words crept in.

"Last time you spoke at an event you told the story of how your childhood fish were called Betta White and Betta Midler."

"They were! Great fish they were too. Icons, both of them, they ruled that fish tank." Gordon paused, seeing the look on her face, the one that warned him to stop talking before she was forced to shut him up herself. "Fine, I'll try to stay on point and keep it all stuffy and boring."

"Really, Gordon, this isn't the time to joke."

"Oh, come on, Pen, it's not that serious, it's just a little talk about my involvement with Walter and the breeding program."

"Not serious? Gordon, this could have an influence on your future."

"My future? Pen, I already know what's in my future. In case you forgot, I already have quite an important job."

"Yes, but you won't be able to do it forever. You'll need a respectable job once you retire from active duty."

"That won't be for years yet," Gordon protested.

"Now is the perfect time to start networking. If you start making positive steps and getting your name known it will help you get a well-respected position in the future. It's never too soon to start making yourself look appealing to the right people."

Gordon wanted to argue that he didn't want to worry about the future yet, he didn't want to think about a time when he couldn't be as involved with International Rescue as he was now. Their organisation had done more than just save the lives of the strangers they went out to rescue, it had saved theirs too. It had brought their father back from the brink of depression so crippling that their grandmother had worried he'd do something stupid. It had given him something to focus on, something that allowed him to do good in the world and prevent others from feeling the same pain he had when he had lost his wife and father. And, when their father had been lost, presumed dead, it had been the continuation of his dream that has given them the motivation to keep going. International Rescue had helped them become the men they were today, and it had helped him become a man he was proud to be. The thought of not being part of that, of being judged as a good man based not on his actions but on his words and how he presented himself didn't sit right with him at all.

As if sensing his thoughts, Penny squeezed his arm. "Do let me help you."

He sighed, trying to gather his thoughts. He knew she wasn't saying all of this to be unkind, she was sure to have his best interests at heart. But knowing that didn't make it any easier to hear, let alone accept.

He took a moment, trying to shift his thinking to something less emotion based and more practical, like she was.

It wasn't that he didn't want to be taken seriously, he always gave a hundred percent to anything he did, be it a rescue or his more scientific work. He'd always had it at the back of his mind that, when the inevitable happened and he did have to retire, he'd have his conservation work to fall back on.

He had a number of connections, some from his WASP days, some he'd made after through his own research work and others that he'd been introduced to through colleagues and collaborative projects. He guessed it did make sense to continue trying to cultivate more professional relationships and, if she was offering to help him, he figured the sensible thing to do would be to take her up on it. She made speeches all the time at numerous functions, often on subjects she knew precious little about, yet she always managed to woo the crowd and shine. He didn't like accepting help, no Tracy ever did, but he'd seen how John had grown in confidence thanks to Selene's support. Selene had learnt the delicate balance of pushing John out of his comfort zone while keeping close enough that he still felt secure.

If he was being honest with himself he'd admit that he wanted the same. He wanted to be able to rely on his partner, to feel like she had his back no matter what. He wanted to know that he had someone by his side that would always fight in his corner. And, while Penny wasn't as subtle as Selene, she was obviously trying to be helpful and supportive in her own way. The least he could do was let her try to help if that was what she wanted to do. How else were they supposed to trust each other if he didn't make the first steps?

"Sure," he finally answered, squeezing her hand in return. "Teach me your ways."