Early Monday morning, Edward silently readies himself for the day. Thinking I'm asleep, he walks close to the bed and peers down for a few breaths before the tips of his fingers sweep down the length of my face. He bends to kiss my cheek before exiting the bedroom. It's soft, sweet, and so wholesome it makes my skin tingle.

I smile the rest of the day.

… Even when Alice spends an hour apologizing for the millionth time.

"Royals, Alice," I say exhaustedly. "I don't know how else to convince you. I get it. I get it! Jasper's your Mate. He had surgery, you were concerned, and you answered the phone. I get it."

I glance at Alice, who's hiding behind her sunglasses under the bright Court 3 sky. We're in the pool again, floating around on her tears as she cries and cries and cries some more.

"We should never have—"

"But we did," I interrupt. "I could have easily told you no or stayed here, but I didn't. That's why I don't blame you. I had the choice, and I chose wrong; but it happened, and it's done now. Can we please just… move on?" I sigh loudly, paddling over to her float.

"If you're sure…"

"You got a strike, Alice. No use in punishing yourself any more than the Royals already have. I'm alive. I'm well. Let's get passed this."

Alice nods, drying her tears with the back of her hand. The silence soothes me. No tears, whimpers, or hiccups come from Alice the rest of the day.

I don't hear from Edward. Not until after lunch that is.

How do you do it? He asks.

Do what?

Stand to be around her for long periods of time?

Don't be mean, I tell him. She's your sister.

She is unbearable at times.

I smile and nod. She sure can be.

When you need a moment to yourself, remember the private patio off our hallway. I would advise you to use that.

Perhaps later. Jasper's taking her out tonight. When will you be home?

Home.

As if sharing this house with him has turned into our home. As if this week will never end.

Much later. I have to present a research article to the board for approval, and then I must attend a dinner with my peers, unfortunately. Will you be alright?

I nod even though he can't see. I haven't been alone in weeks, Edward. I'm looking forward to it.

I will see you tonight, Lovely Belle.

After our mid-afternoon chat, I don't hear from Edward again. I don't know if his block is up or what, but there's a silence I haven't heard in weeks.

When Alice and Jasper leave just before dinner, I nervously run my fingers across his mind just to double-check. Immediately, he sends back the sentiment, but that's all.

Deciding he's probably busy and doesn't want to be interrupted, I throw up my block to avoid distracting him with my thoughts. I straighten the room I haven't slept in, pile up the books I've finished since arriving last week, and put away the dishes I washed earlier.

It's just after seven when the doorbell rings, taking me by surprise.

My heart triple beats, my palms sweat, and my throat becomes dry. Alice and Jasper are gone, and Edward would never knock… who could it be?

I peer through the hole in the door and see no one. Tentatively and with shaky fingers, I pull open the door to find a brown bag sitting at the doorstep with a note.

Belle—

Eat.

See you soon.

—Edward

Simple and to the point. A small smile grows at his thoughtfulness. I grab the bag and some silverware and make my way to the private patio. The setting sun lasts for hours instead of minutes in this Court, and I think I might miss this most of all.

Vibrant colors that swirl into the sky like colorful puffs of air decorate my view as I eat whatever this chicken meal is that Edward had delivered for me. In the quiet, I think about Jane and our talk, Alice and her strike, and the impending trial in Court 1. Fear rushes through me. Court 1 scares me more than anything else. Who will be there? What will they say? Will I be in trouble? Will Jasper? No, I remind myself. This trial is for Aro.

After I finish and clean up dinner, I change into a simple bathing suit with a low front and off-the-shoulder straps. It's a little big, so the straps keep falling, causing my breasts to nearly pop out. It's just me, though, so I decide it doesn't really matter.

Before leaving the room, I quickly write Jane a letter asking to speak with her when I return to Court 5. Leaving the note on my desk, I wait. Just as it happened previously, the note disappears. It's equally cool and frightening how they just know.

Instead of the pool out back, I opt for the hot tub. Following Edward's instructions when I first arrived, the water comes to life; jets force out water as bubbles begin to appear at the top. The water pressure eases my muscles as I climb into the overly-warm bath.

There's a perfect view of the darkening sky as the sun makes room for the moon. What did Edward call this… twilight?

The sky darkens faster and faster before the moon finally pushes out the last bit of light. It's deep and bright and so very beautiful. It shines high, casting soft light onto the otherwise darkened patio.

I spend forever in this hot tub watching the sky, studying the moon, and being consumed by the galaxies. I wonder what's out there, who is out there, and what they know. I wonder if they're happy—happier than I am—and if they're safe to think and do whatever they wish. I think about my family and how so many times they'd tell me to trust the process … and I did. I am … but at what cost?

I know what I want.

I know who I want.

And then, in the slowest blink of a moment, pieces of the sky sink slowly downward. Burnt orange droplets and a teal tails sparkle as they drop. I've never seen anything like it, and I convince myself I must have imagined it.

"Some researchers have studied that very galaxy for decades," Edward says behind me. I turn to face him, but he shakes his head and points above us where another part of the sky slips away and falls. "Decades, Belle, and now it's just … gone."

"Where did it go?" I whisper.

Edward snaps, but I don't look to see what's changed.

"They are not certain," he says, climbing into the large hot tub with me. "Some theorize it was absorbed by the universe, and some speculate it was extinguished."

"Extinguished?" I ask. "Like… like a candle?"

He glances over at me as the water that laps against his burning tattoo. "Exactly like that. How was your day, Lovely?" he asks, smiling as if I could easily forget his cryptic words.

"Uhm… it was nice. Why would it be extinguished?"

Edward moves closer. "I missed you." His smile lights up his face. He doesn't look concerned, but I am, so I glance over to see he's still moving closer. He shakes his head again and whispers, "you're going to miss the best part."

Pulling my eyes from his face, I look back up at the darkening sky. The galaxy falls around us like raining glitter. It falls slowly, illuminating the sky like tinsel. More and more pieces of the galaxy burst, drop and fall around the sky like confetti.

"This is the start," he explains. "Most citizens think this is planned by Court 3; this is part of their celebration for the warlock who rid Court 3 of the witches." More pieces fall out of the galaxy above and shimmer down. "What they don't know about is all the research, Belle. And do you know what the research points to?" By this time, he's made his way next to me. Hot breath tickles my cheek. I shake my head. "That," he whispers, pointing to the sky, "is done by the Lark sisters. Every year."

"Are they still alive?" I ask. "After all this time."

"That is what I am going to figure out."

Is it safe to talk about?

He smiles and nods.

"My research proposal was about the celebration on the mountain, the strange water I showed you, and the Falling Sky."

"Is that what it's called?" I giggle at the simplicity.

He chuckles back and says, "the scientific term is called Astreonemble Liberation, but most people call it the Falling Sky."

"Liberation?" I ask softly, glancing up at him.

He finds my hand underwater. "Exactly."

~!~

Edward and I stay in the hot tub for a while longer and watch the stars above. Tiny pieces of the galaxy continue to fall, lighting up the Court in twinkling lights. He explains his research proposal on this galaxy that he's working with a peer who knows more about space, but with his knowledge of the Larks, they're combining efforts to figure out why this occurs every year.

There's more to it that Edward doesn't say; whether it's because of who's listening, or he just doesn't entirely know himself yet, he doesn't expand a whole lot. I nod and accept anything he'll give me.

And then his hand finds purchase between my thighs, much like when we were driving last night. It's innocent until I feel the pressure of his fingers grip my skin and pull my leg over his.

He smiles down at me and whispers, "if I could kiss you right now, I would steal the breath from your lungs. That is how badly I want you."

My insides blaze, my core turns to lava, and I try to squeeze my legs shut to relieve the ache that pulses in the middle. Edward's hand gets caught between my thighs, and when I straighten, my body pulls him closer.

"I… I would love to try something," he whispers huskily with a laugh, "Royals, anything with you, Belle."

"Yes," I encourage selfishly. "Anything."

"While we are alone," he tells me softly, pushing my hair away from my neck, inching his hand higher up my leg until his pinky presses against my fabric between my legs. His eyes stare down at the old markings he placed on my neck.

I part my legs slightly, allowing room for him to flatten his hand against my center and lose my fingers in his hair. We're both desperate and aroused and eager.

But I'm nervous. I haven't been with a man since Jake—

"I am not him," he tells me softly.

I nod, slightly embarrassed he overheard. Soft skin against mine proves his point. Edward is everything Jake could hope to be. He smiles at the thought before his face darkens, and I don't even have to listen to hear where his own thoughts go.

"And I am not her," I remind him.

He nods in understanding.

"I would like to try, but you need to move slowly with me, Belle. Things might change in an instant, and—"

"You set the pace," I tell him. "I'll follow."

Edward leans down and caresses my neck with his tongue. It's warm and wet and so hot that I nearly combust. His hand presses against my center the same moment my hips grind down. A mewl gets caught in my throat.

Edward pulls me onto his lap, so I'm straddling him. My upper half sits above the water, the jets shooting water around my belly button. Edward looks into my eyes at the same moment his fingers find the straps of my bathing suit and slides them down my arms.

My exposed breasts pucker in anticipation. Still meeting my eyes, Edward cups them in his hands and squeezes. We both moan as my hardened nipples press against his palms.

I sit back on his thighs, avoiding his arousal just in case, and let him feel me.

And Royals does he.

Edward takes his time exploring my chest, touching my breasts, pinching my nipples between his fingers. When he gives a tentative tug, I arch my back and moan deep in my throat.

And then it's as though he uses his magic to his advantage. When I subconsciously think more and harder, he gives me more and harder. When I subconsciously think, taste me, he leans forward and licks my breast from underneath to the bottom of my nipple.

"All of me," I whimper.

Deep green orbs stare up at me as he places my nipple on his flattened tongue and takes one hard swipe. It's the first time I've ever felt this, and knowing it's Edward has me grinding against him. Encouraged by my reaction, he moves to my other nipple. The velvety wetness of his tongue flicks against the hardened peak at the same moment his fingers curl into the skin of my hips.

My hands fly to his hair as he pulls me forward onto his lap, placing me above where he's hardest. As he's nestled below me, it's hard to think through the haze of my arousal. When Edward grinds me purposefully against him, the firmness pressing into my bathing-suit-covered center, I toss my head back and moan louder than I have before.

Embarrassment spikes only momentarily until his fingers grip me even harder and pull me back down his length, pressing me harder and faster. He switches to my other breast as I grind against him. His teeth bite down on my nipple at the exact moment his arousal hits against the spot that feels like liquid heat has been poured under my skin. Stars begin to fall around me as I squeeze my eyes shut and grind against him the next time. My body takes over, naturally gyrating my hips and chasing that liquid heat again.

It's harder and faster than the pace he set, and just as my body begins to tingle, he's shoving me off with a loud, blatant, "fuck!"

I scramble in the water and move away from him, afraid I might hurt him or cause a further issue, but Edward doesn't accept this.

He reaches out roughly and pulls me to him with a loud groan and apologetic eyes. Within seconds, I'm cradled into his chest, and he's breathing in my soaked hair.

"Fuck," he whispers repeatedly. "Fuck!"

"It's okay," I tell him softly. "It's okay, Edward."

"Did I hurt you?"

I scoff at the question. "Of course not. Did I hurt you?"

He shakes his head. "No… maybe this position… maybe it's not the best for us right now. Can we try another position?"

I can't help but smile at the thought of getting to try again. "You … you want to try again?"

Edward pulls back and looks down at me like I've just said the most insane thing he's ever heard. "Why would I not want to try again?" he asks incredulously.

I shrug. "I just don't want to push you…"

"You are going to come tonight," he whispers in my ear, biting my neck softly.

"Come where?" I ask.

He smirks, his body shaking with a silent laugh as he answers, "in my bed, maybe the shower… I was hoping this hot tub, but now I don't know…"

My brows knit together. "You want me to come to your bed? Edward, you don't have to ask," I laugh, confused about why he's asking me that. I've been sleeping in his bed for days now—

"Belle—" he starts, pulling back to watch me. His words come out slow and deliberate. "When you touch yourself … what happens at the end?"

"The end? Like… like when I release?" I whisper in embarrassment.

"Yes. What do you call that?"

"Uhm … nothing? Just … release? Climax?"

He smiles differently than I've ever seen before. It's soft and simple. It's innocent.

Before I can process it, Edward's gripping my wrist and snapping us into his room. We're dry and dressed in nothing but underwear. His tight boxers sit low on his hips, the erection pressing against the cotton. The size takes my breath away.

"Can we just… try something?" he asks slowly, backing me up against the bed.

"Of course," I say easily, trailing my eyes back up his body.

He bends, kissing my neck softly, tickling his way to the other side before circling my wrist with his fingers and placing my hand at the edge of my underwear.

"Will you touch yourself for me, Belle?" he whispers hoarsely into my ear.

"What—"

"I would really like to watch, and…" he trails off, pulling back to say, "narrate."

"Narrate?"

He nods. "Explain to you what things are called, why your body feels a certain way, the reason some things feel better than others. Would you allow me to do that?"

I swallow hard. It's not that I'm embarrassed… okay, I am embarrassed.

Hearing that, Edward smiles at my blush and tucks my hair behind my ear. "If you are uncomfortable—"

"Will you do it too?" I ask, swallowing hard.

His eyes glance from mine to my hardened nipples and then to the way my fingers are slowly inching down the cotton underwear.

"If that is what you wish," he says.

Bravely, I peel down my underwear before scooting back on the bed until I'm flat against the pillows. My knees are drawn to conceal what's between my legs. Edward stays put, his knees touching the edge of the mattress as he attempts to get as close as possible. We're separated by a few feet, but I can take in his whole body from my position.

We drink each in during the same few moments. My eyes travel across his broad shoulders, down his firm chest, to the obvious bulge in his underwear, and ending on his muscular thighs. I begin to think about all the ways we're not equal—his firm, toned belly compared to my soft, supple one and his thick, strong legs compared to the way my thighs jiggle and touch. But he doesn't let me get lost in my thoughts as he clears his throat. Our eyes meet, and his are erotically black with anticipation. It's only when he speaks do I forget everything.

"Your nipples are hardened partly from the cold, but mostly from your arousal," he tells me. "Your skin has goosebumps from anticipation. Do me a favor, Lovely, and close your block. I want this to be about you. Don't worry about what I'm doing or thinking. I do not want to… distract you."

I swallow dryly and close my block. It's silent in the room now, save for our accelerated breaths.

"Do what feels good," he whispers.

I avoid his gaze by closing my eyes and moving my right hand to my breast. Nervously, I squeeze, avoiding my sensitive nipple.

"You touch your breasts to create anticipation," he tells me softly. "Notice how you do not immediately pull on your nipples. When you finally do touch them," he tells me the moment my fingers graze my nipples, "they will be much more sensitive."

I moan softly, barely a whisper, as I press my nipple between my thumb and pointer and roll.

"It's… it's different than when you do it," I tell him.

"Your body predicts your own movements. The sensation is heightened when your body cannot anticipate where I am going to touch you," he says before whispering, "do you like when I touch you, Belle?"

"Yes."

"What do you like?"

"When you do this." I show him with my fingers how he grabs my entire breast and palms it, squeezing, then plucking my nipples. My back arches slightly.

"Yes," he hisses, "I quite like that as well. Your nipples are very sensitive. Watch how they hardened just before you…" he trails off as I squeeze my breast before dragging my nipples between my fingers, "do that."

"I want you to do more," I whisper, eyes still closed.

He's silent for a second before replying, "show me what you would like me to do."

Slowly, I lower my legs and spread them. He's seeing me. He's seeing all of me. His stare heats every inch of my skin like a match, and my center burns with fire.

He groans in pleasure, but I'm too scared to open my eyes. Too scared this isn't real. Too scared that it's going to stop at any moment.

My right hand travels down my belly as my left stays on my breast. Arousal coats my mound and inner thighs, and a blush creeps up my body. It's not shame or embarrassment; it's lust and excitement that he's watching me.

"Your body creates a natural lubricant to prepare for sex," he tells me evenly before taking a breath and exhaling erratically. "You're soaked in it."

Pressing my fingers on my mound and pulling up, I expose myself to him.

"That is your pubic area," he says deeply as I trail my fingers down, creating a V and opening myself. Edward takes in an uneven, shaky breath. "Those are your outer lips. So fucking delicious," he whispers more for himself. "You don't have large inner lips."

"Is that bad?" I ask nervously.

"All female bodies are made differently," he says. "Yours… yours is very…" Edward trails off, and a spike of anxiety crashes through me.

"What, Edward?" I ask, bending my knees and closing my legs in sudden embarrassment.

I feel the bed dip as he gets on. Warm hands rest atop my knees as he soothes me.

"Belle," he whispers. "Please open your eyes."

I do as he asks and find him kneeling before me, boxers off, exposed in a way I've never seen him before.

"Yours is very pretty," he tells me with such honesty that his green eyes beam down, crashing into me like waves of reassurance. "Please do not stop," he says softly, gripping one leg with both hands as he helps me spread myself again. Slowly, his hand trails to my ankle, grips, and lifts to plant my foot on the outside of his body. He does the same with the other leg.

Edward's between my legs now, a hand on either knee, keeping me spread open for his viewing. His eyes fixate on my center, that's inches away. My belly flutters as I watch him watch me. The edge of his pink tongue pokes out the side of his mouth as he fixates on my arousal. He's so close now.

Our bodies pull to each other, I can feel it in my bones. My hips lift and lower slowly, but he catches the movement immediately. It wouldn't take much to connect, for him to lower himself and press into me, to fill me—

"Your block," Edward says, tightening his grip on my knees.

"S-sorry," I whisper.

I watch him watch my fingers as I make the V again, opening myself as the wetness and arousal leak from me. I glance down his body, past his defined chest and narrow hips to the very long, very thick erection jutting from his body. The tip glistens and leaks much like my body does.

He's as broad and thick as he is long. For the briefest of moments, I wonder what pleasure would amount from something so large, but I stop when the tip leaks and bounces. Glancing up, I notice he's watching me watch him, and I don't stop. Eyes back on him, I try to count the engorged veins traveling across his shaft but lose count. The more I watch, the more swollen and redder his shaft becomes. Finally seeing him, all of him, is too much, and I desperately need to be touched. However, while my fingers slide down my mound to my sensitive flesh, getting ready to touch myself, I notice he's not doing the same.

"Edward," I call, pulling him from his trance. Nodding to what I mean, he swallows hard and grips his erection at the base. Long fingers wrap tightly around his engorged flesh, making my mouth water. There's still so much of him left even after he's wrapped his large hand around it. I've never thought about putting one of those in my mouth before, but right now, I can't stop.

Watching him is the single sexiest thing I have ever seen, and when the moan bubbles out, my finger finds its way to the hardened nub that delivers pleasure.

Edward groans slightly as he watches.

"That is your clitoris," he says deeply. "There are far more nerves there than I have here," he tells me. "It is also referred to as the clit."

I rub in slow circles, mewling with each swipe.

"Do you enjoy playing with your clit for me, Belle?" he asks, and my body ignites into flames.

I don't know how much hotter I can get and still not be in danger. It's as though my body is a wildfire, contained to his bed, the heat spreading rapidly across my skin, into my toes, and out through my hair.

"Yes," I whisper, watching his fist drag slowly up his erection as he circles the head before sliding back down to the base.

"Remember what this is called?"

"Your cock," I tell him quietly.

He moans softly and hisses, "yes; do you like when I touch my cock for you?"

"Yes, Edward," I whimper, pinching my nipple harder.

"Slide your fingers down."

I obey.

"That is your vaginal opening," he says breathily, watching my fingers circle.

"I know."

His eyes stare deeply, willing my fingers away so he can see it all. His throat bobs as he swallows and admits, "I want to feel you there."

"How?"

He lets out a low growl, gritting his teeth to hold in groans of pleasure. "With my fingers," he answers. "With my mouth."

"Your mouth?" I ask, fingers dipping into my opening briefly before moving up to rub hard and fast against my clit.

"Would you let me taste you?"

"Yes." It's an immediate answer that doesn't require thought.

Edward crawls closer to me on his knees. His cock juts so far out that it hangs over my belly. The closer he crawls, the more my legs spread. And the more my legs spread, the deeper my core aches. It spreads like wings across my midsection before shooting down into my toes.

"Edward," I pant, pointing my toes to release the sensation.

It's intense and pleasurable and so erotic I might combust.

"Look at me," he says softly.

It's not a command; it's permission.

Permission to open himself. Permission to be free. Permission to watch me.

So, I do. I look right at him. His eyes are no longer watching my fingers slide through my folds; they're watching my face.

He studies me intently. The heaving, pants, and moans. The arch of my back, the collection of sweat along my neck, and the half-parted mouth that moans and mewls and whimpers as my thighs shake and my legs seize.

"You are going to orgasm," he tells me softly. "Let go and feel it, Belle. Be as loud or as quiet as you would like. Enjoy the pleasure, Lovely. You fucking deserve it."

My eyes watch his before dropping to his erection. It's engorged and dripping, much like my own arousal. His pace picks up slightly the longer I look.

"Fuck, Belle, please," he whimpers.

"Please, what?"

"Please do not make me come first," he sort of laughs, head hanging in embarrassment.

I still don't know what that truly means, but I get the gist now. I rub my clit faster, moving my fingers in a side-to-side motion. Edward's trapped between my legs, and when the pleasure gets to be too much, I can't shut them like I need to.

He traps me, keeps me open, and gives me this pleasure in the most intimate way.

He watches me carefully, taking his bottom lip between his teeth and speeding up.

"Show me how good you can feel," he whispers softly. "Come for me, Belle. Please."

I don't know if it's his words, the way he watches me, or his pleas, but something in this moment causes the rope to tighten and eventually snap.

"Edward," I moan loudly.

The hand grabbing my breast moves lower and clutches onto his thigh. As my nails sink into the muscled skin, he roars like thunder above me.

Hot, white streams of liquid shoot out of him. I know what it is, but I've never seen it so close. He doesn't shield it from my body like Jake used to, so I'm drenched in him. Pearly liquid covers my belly, my breasts, and my neck.

He doesn't stop until my fingers do.

And when I can't take the painful pleasure any longer, my numb hand falls limply to my side, and I lay on his bed panting.

Both of us take in the other, but neither says a word. His eyes roam down my chest, across my neck, to my belly, and then between my thighs.

I pull my block down slowly to hear his thoughts.

Mine.

Marked.

Mate.

Sexy.

Mine.

Mine.

Mine.

I slowly sit up as he rests on his heels.

"Yours," I whisper to him.

~!~

Edward and I shower together. It's simple and innocent and sweet.

He lathers my skin, watching the remnants of himself slide down my body. Edward massages my neck and shoulders, caressing my arms and back. Long, soapy fingers wash my hair slowly, combing through my tangles with his fingers before I return the favor. We share a laugh when he has to bend uncomfortably for me to reach him.

He kisses down my neck to my shoulder before falling to his knees as I shampoo his locks. My fingers massage his scalp, soothing him into peace, helping him let go of whatever troubling thoughts eat at him.

And I know they do because he's quiet.

His head rests on my belly just below my breasts, and he pulls me into him in a simple, honest embrace. We stay this way for a long while, but I don't mind. The intimacy we just shared was so raw and revealing that I could lay with him for days in this silence and still feel heard.

Thank you, he whispers after some time. For accepting me, for helping me, for what we did in there… it was…

I giggle softly and nod silently.

There are no words. You have not one clue how much that helped.

Helped what, Edward?

Helped everything, Belle. I am not ready for you to touch me, but I think I am ready to touch you, and that proved it. Watching you do that… it was… I have never experienced anything of that significance. It was magnificent.

It certainly was.

~!~

After the shower, I dress in a loose, oversized shirt and crawl into bed. Edward sits at his desk and writes for a while as I doze in and out of sleep. He wakes my light slumber as he slides under the covers.

"School tomorrow?" I ask sleepily.

"Not until nine."

"Wake me before you go?"

"If that is what you wish."

"It is."

"Then I will wake you," he whispers, tucking me under the covers and pulling me close.

Later that night, thunder and lighting wake us both from a deep sleep. When a crash of thunder shakes the walls, I scoot closer to him.

"That was loud," I tell him.

"It always storms the day before the celebration. I think the Lark sisters are trying to tell us something," he laughs.

"Tell us what?"

"That they're sad for us."

He doesn't have to explain further.

Another clap of thunder hurts my ears and makes my heart race. It's followed by three more.

"Tell me what you wish for late at night when the world sleeps, and it is just your thoughts," Edward whispers, scooting down, so we're at eye level.

I smile. "Don't you already know?"

He smiles back and says, "I would love to hear you say the words."

I nod, suddenly nervous. He knows it all, but to willingly tell him is something else entirely.

With a deep breath, I whisper, "I wish for you."

"You have me," he reassures softly. "You have more of me than I have of myself."

"Not forever," I tell him sadly, emotion welling in my eyes. It pools and spills over, running down my cheek.

Edward kisses it away.

"I am trying," he whispers.

"How can I help?" I ask desperately.

He shakes his head. "I—I do not know when or if I will ever get the answers I seek. Promise me one thing, Belle?"

"What?" I sniffle.

"If I cannot—if we do not—" he pauses with a heavy sigh. "When the time comes, if nothing has changed, please promise you will accept the name in your letter?" It hurts so much I can't remember how to speak. "Please," he whispers sadly. "My wish is to see you happy."

"I—," I start, unable to finish.

Edward lets me cry into him. He doesn't wipe away my tears, and I don't wipe away his. This is the most honest conversation we've had. Preparing for a future that might not include him hurts more than I could have ever imagined.

"Please, Belle, promise me."

With my block as tight as I can shut it, I nod slowly.

"I promise," I lie.

Edward pulls me to him and accepts my response. Whether he believes it or not, he acknowledges my words.

"You are mine until then," he whispers, kissing my cheek, "and I will not let go until I have to."

"Promise?" I whisper.

"I fucking vow, Belle."

Thunder turns less angry just as rain pelts against the glass. Water pours from the black sky like bullets, and that's exactly what it sounds like bouncing off the walls of this home.

a/n: I'm splitting this one in two parts because it was really long! The next part will be posted next Friday! I hope you enjoyed ;)

Thank you to Fran for beta-ing!

eepwrites on Instagram for inspo pics, chapter teasers, etc.

Don't forget to review- each one is appreciated!