When Todoroki's condition stabilized from Recovery Girl's Quirk and care, Bakugou was allowed some time to speak with Todoroki in private. With Todoroki's note in his pocket, the ash-blonde approached his motionless boyfriend. He twined his calloused digits with Todoroki's pale hand and released a long sigh.

Fucking hell, I feel like breaking down into tears again, Bakugou inwardly reviled himself. How many times has he tried to die? Dammit, this shit's making my chest hurt. What do I even say to him? And since when was he so pale? Looks thinner too. His pupils are so damn small right now. He's shaking. This isn't even the first time he's overdosed, but the first time was unintentional. Goddamn…

The silence engulfing the room was abruptly rent by the hoarse whisper of Todoroki's voice. "Why…do you care about me so much? Because you love me? Katsuki, I won't lie… Hearing 'I love you' just feels like a lie. It's lost all meaning to me. Even if it's the absolute truth, it just sounds like pity or a bad attempt at consoling me." His gaze drifted up to meet Bakugou's.

With sagging brows and a loose frown, Bakugou sighed, "You're my classmate, my teammate, my rival, my friend, my best friend, and my significant other. You're not just 'that person' to me. We've been on a journey together over these past two years, and I've formed such a goddamn strong bond with you. If you wanna ask how I managed that, I couldn't tell you. It's just how humans work, Shouto." A tight, burning sensation writhed in his chest once Todoroki's empty eyes looked away.

"So…I'm not human?"

Bakugou's expression twitched. "That ain't what I'm saying, you dumbass… But after all this, you really haven't formed any kind of bond with me?" He gently ran his thumb over Todoroki's knuckles.

Todoroki shrugged. "Kat, I don't know. But I want to be able to love you the way you love me. I don't know if I want this, or if, somewhere that I can't reach, I'm longing to be a good person again, to please people again, or… I just don't know. But if you're wondering why I suddenly resorted to this overdose, I have a note that's probably in my futon." He watched Bakugou extract that note from his pocket. "Oh.

The poem that's on the back… Bakugou cogitated. Did he write it? Who else would've?

"I think you're trying to find a reason to live," sighed Bakugou as he turned over the note. "The fact that you want to love me, though, makes me love your dumb ass even more." He scratched the back of his head. "But what's the poem on the back of it?"

Todoroki lightly turned his head to face his lover. "Nothing."

"Nothing? I don't believe that."

"Sorry. I didn't want to bring the conversation back into something dark. Katsuki, I… I think I've been lying to myself about not wanting to die. It feels like that desire has dissolved into everything else, but it's still there. It's not because I'm sad. It's not to escape abuse. It's not because I'm suffering. I'm just…tired of being alive. I feel like I've achieved it all already. Where am I supposed to go from there? Down? If I have nothing else to look up to and only things to look down at, what's the point? My reason seems so invalid, though. Maybe that's why I've denied it. There are people that attempt suicide because they're beyond just sad every single day, because they've been abused in one way or another, because they can't handle something anymore, like the loss of a loved one, stress from school, issues with their family... Me? I'm kinda tired of doing the same things over and over again.

"It'll be our last year at U.A. in a few months, but it really won't be changing much. College? I could do it without any problems. But do I have any real reason to? No. Should I do it? Yes. Will I? Yes. But…honestly, I'd rather die than make it that far. Why put in so much work for nothing? For a future I don't care about? For goals that I made simply to fit in and seem normal? I was hoping…that you'd be asleep when I overdosed. Even so, I still texted you. Why is it…that the world doesn't want me to die when it's given me every reason to? It's almost not fair. There has to be a reason why I'm still alive, but I can't find it, and when I give up, the world forces me to keep walking. It's tantalizing. But is it worth it? I don't think so. Katsuki, what's wrong with me?"

A twinge of pain shot through Bakugou's chest as he slowly digested Todoroki's unvarnished words. "Shouto…" He curled his arms around Todoroki, holding him fast. "I—"

"If you're going to say 'I love you,' I really don't want to hear it. How selfish of me. I'm sorry. I just…" Todoroki buried his face into his hands, and within seconds, his shoulders began to twitch up and down. "I…"

Bakugou's heart sank into his stomach once a revelation beleaguered his mind. "Let it all out…" he whispered as he slowly massaged Todoroki's shoulders. "Ain't no shame in feeling sad." He felt his own eyes grow heavy with a familiar haze pooling up in his lower eyelids.

Todoroki shook his head, but he still did not reciprocate Bakugou's embrace. "You don't…understand," he murmured. "Katsuki, I'm not sad. I'm not depressed. I'm tired of so many people assuming I'm depressed, sad, sick… There's nothing for me to let out anymore. But I thought…maybe that was just a lie I told myself too." He lowered his hands from his face. "I thought…if I put myself in the right position, I'd finally start to cry genuine tears like the point before the denouement of a movie. I thought…I'd feel my heart be crushed under the weight of so much suppressed sorrow and grief." His shoulders no longer spasmed. "But I can't…even make myself cry anymore. I could fake tears before. Why…can't I cry anymore? Why? What's wrong with me? Katsuki, what…" His voice was grated into a whisper. "What's wrong with me?"

Dumbass… Bakugou thought to himself once his tears grew too large to occupy the space in his eyes any longer. How…the hell would I know? I don't know. I thought that was finally it… I thought you'd finally hit your breaking point. I thought you were gonna cry as I comforted you. Why… He felt Todoroki's scarred arms embrace his torso, and as another wave of tears paraded down his cheeks, a soft sob escaped his lips.

"I'm here, Katsuki…" Todoroki reassured Bakugou, whose shoulders were shaken by a torrent of emotion.

Why is it the other way around?! You're the one that's suffered the most, and yet, I'm always the one sobbing over what happens to you… Your entire body is cut up with bleeding wounds that won't heal, and yet…you're the one comforting me, a person with a few bruises and scars here and there, as if my wounds are yours. It hurts… IT FUCKING HURTS, SHOUTO! I'm not the one that wants to end it all! I want to live…and yet, the person that just tried to take his life is the one that's always been here for me, someone that hasn't felt half the pain he's suffered! You know how to save me…but how do I save you from yourself?!