Natsuki: "Seriously? You brought a boy?"
Natsuki: "Way to kill the atmosphere."

"That reminds me, I've been meaning to ask, Natsuki," Monika began, looking towards the youngest member of the club. "What did you mean by that, anyway?"

"Yes, I'm curious, too." Yuri followed. "Why would a boy kill the atmosphere?"

"Has this seriously never come up before?" Natsuki asked, to which everyone else shook their heads. "I'm a lesbian."

"Oh." Monika said.
"That makes sense." Yuri commented.
"Explains so much." Sayori followed.

"Wait, WHAT?!" The three yelled at the pink-haired girl.

"Bu-but I thought-" Monika stuttered, still trying to comprehend what Natsuki just said. "You're a route in a dating simulator where the main character is most definitely a guy."

"Yeah, and notice that I never confess to him during my route." Natsuki said. "And while you guys are still gaga over him during someone else's route, I don't pay it any mind."

"B-but I thought that was…" Monika stuttered. "Y-you know, cause you're a…?"

"Nope, it's cause I legit wasn't interested." Natsuki said. "I mean, come on guys, what did you think 'Amy Likes Spiders' was a metaphor for?"

"… Manga?" Sayori said, earning a roll of Natsuki's pink eyes. "Okay, yeah, this does make more sense."

"And she was pretty excited to join the club once she saw the three of us." Yuri noted.

"Boy, I wish I knew this sooner." Monika sighed. "Would have made things way easier for me."

Monika: "Ah, MoNatSaYuri, what a nice surprise!"

"Well," Natsuki began. "At least someone-"

"Wait a minute!" Yuri blurted out as she began blushing. "D-does that mean when I dropped my book and bent over to pick it up that one time, we-were you…"

"Yes, I was." Natsuki said with her own blush. "If it makes you feel better, you have great taste in underwear."

"Uh, I feel so violated." Yuri groaned.

"You think you feel grossed out?!" Natsuki began yelling. "I eyed up my killer for weeks, Yuri! Weeks!"

Monika: "Welcome to the club!"
MoNatSaYuri: "…"
All words escape me in this situation.
This club…

"'-Is run by a demon!'" Natsuki yelled out in MoNatSaYuri's voice.

…Is full of incredibly cute girls!

"'And a demon!'" Natsuki yelled. "'Quick, everyone, we need to get out of here!'"

Natsuki: "What are you looking at?"
Natsuki: "If you want to say something, say it."
MoNatSaYuri: "S-Sorry…"
Yuri: "Natsuki…"
Natsuki: "Hmph."
The girl with the sour attitude, whose name is apparently Natsuki, is one I don't recognize.

"'Which is weird, cause I should recognize a Youtube fin-gnome-ina when I see one.'" Natsuki said with a smirk.

"It's pronounced 'phenomenon.'" Yuri corrected.

Her small figure makes me think she's probably a first-year.

"… What?" Natsuki growled, gritting her teeth at the screen.

She is also the one who made cupcakes, according to Sayori.

"What did you say about my figure?" Natsuki continued to growl.

"Re-relax, Natsuki," Sayori began. "He-I'm sure he didn't mean it like that."

"Bitch, you want to see what these arms can do to you!" Natsuki yelled out, cracking her knuckles.

Sayori: "You can just ignore her when she gets moody-"

"That's it!" Natsuki said as she grabbed at the screen, barely held back by the rest of her club. "1V1 me IRL, 1V1 ME IRL, BITCH!"

~Later~

"Okay, we good?" Monika asked Natsuki, who simply huffed at the president before Monika turned back to the screen. "Good enough."

Sayori: "You can just ignore her when she gets moody-"
Sayori says that quietly into my ear, then turns back towards the other girls.
Sayori: "Anyway, this is Natsuki, always full of energy."

"No, I'm always full of anger and spite." Natsuki huffed.

Sayori: "And this is Yuri, the smartest in the club."
Yuri: "D-don't say things like that…"
Yuri, who appears comparably more mature and timid, seems to have a hard time keeping up with people like Sayori and Natsuki.
MoNatSaYuri: "Ah… Well, it's nice to meet both of you."
Sayori: "And it sounds like you already know Monika, is that right?"

"Unfortunately." Natsuki and Yuri both sighed, earning a scowl from the president.

Monika: "That's right."

"See, even Monika agrees with us." Natsuki chuckled.

"Don't put words in my mouth!" Monika retorted.

"Why not? You put words in ours."

"Yeah, well…" Monika stuttered, trying to think of a counter as she pointed towards the smaller girl. "… Shut up."

Monika: "It's great to see you again, MoNatSaYuri."
Monika smiles sweetly.

"Wow, Game Grumps were right." Sayori said. "We do almost look like the same person from that angle."

We do know each other – well, we rarely talked, but we were in the same class last year.
Monika was probably the most popular girl in class – smart, beautiful, athletic.

"I'm gonna go puke." Natsuki joked after 'struggling' to read the last sentence as she got up out of her chair. "Reading that legit made me sick."

Basically, completely out of my league.

"Oh, trust me, MoNatSaYuri," Yuri began, interlacing her fingers as Natsuki began pretending to vomit into the trashcan. "You and Monika are indeed in two completely different leagues."

So, having her smile at me so genuinely feels a little…

"Oh, don't worry, it's not genuine." Yuri said.

MoNatSaYuri: "Y-you too, Monika."
Sayori: "Come sit down, MoNatSaYuri! We made room for you at the table, so you can sit next to me or Monika."

"Sit next to Monika!" Natsuki called out. "It's easier to hit her then!"

Sayori: "I'll get the cupcakes~"
Natsuki: "Hey! I made them, I'll get them!"
Sayori: "Sorry, I got a little too excited."
Yuri: "Then, how about I make some tea as well?"

"Yes, do that, and splash it in Monika's face!" Natsuki called out before ducking her head back into the trash can.

"Might as well call these videos, 'The Roast of Monika,' cause that's all they're gonna be at this rate." Monika sighed with an annoyed scowl.

The girls have a few desks arranged to form a table.

"Really?" Yuri asked. "Wow, could have fooled me with how all the desks appear to be in perfectly arranged rows."

As Sayori mentioned, it's been widened so that there is one space next to Monika and one space next to Sayori.
Natsuki and Yuri walk over to the corner of the room, where Natsuki grabs a wrapped tray and Yuri opens the closet.

"That was always opened, but why would a visual novel have visuals?" Yuri snarked.

"You just don't understand the medium, Yuri." Natsuki said as she sat back down.

Still feeling awkward, I take a seat next to Sayori.

"You'll just have to imagine this is all happening, cause god knows we didn't animate it." Sayori joked.

Natsuki proudly marches back to the table, tray in hand.
Natsuki: "Okaaay, are you ready?"
Natsuki: "… Ta-daa!"
Sayori: "Uwoooah!"

"It turns out to be a gun, which I then use to shoot Monika!" Natsuki joked.

Natsuki lifts the foil off the tray to reveal a dozen white, fluffy cupcakes decorated to look like little cats.
The whiskers are drawn with icing, and little pieces of chocolate were used to make ears.
Sayori: "So cuuuute~!"

"God damn it," Natsuki sighed as she placed a hand on the side of her head. "I really was making everything I do overly cutesy, wasn't I?"

Monika: "I had no idea you were so good at baking, Natsuki!"
Natsuki: "Ehehe. Well, you know."

"Come to think of it, where did you even learn how to bake?" Monika asked.

"Home EC, where else?" Natsuki stated.

"… Well, I guess when you ask a silly question…"

Natsuki: "Just hurry and take one!"

"'The poison I put in Monika's is about to expire.'" Natsuki joked.

Sayori grabs one first, then Monika. I follow.

"'Then Natsuki, then Sayori, then Yuri, then Sayori again, then this guy named Fred.'" Sayori joked.

Sayori: "It's delicious!"
Sayori talks with her mouth full, and already has managed to get icing on her face.

"By the way guys, I feel insulted." Natsuki huffed. "I gave you all such adorable cupcakes, and not one of you took a picture of them. I worked hard on those things."

I turn the cupcake around in my fingers, looking for the best angle to take a bite.
Natsuki is quiet.
I can't help but notice her sneaking glances in my direction.
Is she waiting for me to take a bite?

"No, I'm waiting for you to spread me across the table like butter and fuck me." Natsuki snarked. "Yes, I'm waiting for you to take a bite."

I finally bite down.
The icing is sweet and full of flavor – I wonder if she made it herself.
MoNatSaYuri: "This is really good."
Natsuki: "W-why are you thanking me? It's not like I…!"

"Past me, what are you doing!?" Natsuki yelled.

(Haven't I heard this somewhere before…?)
Natsuki: "… Made them for you or anything."

"So, Natsuki, how do you explain this?" Monika asked.

"I-it's exactly as I was saying, I didn't make them specifically for him." Natsuki said. "And I-eh-I'm not used to hearing stuff like that."

MoNatSaYuri: "Eh? I thought you technically did. Sayori said-"
Natsuki: "Well, maybe!"
Natsuki: "But not for, y-you know, you! Dummy…"

"Good god, I really acted like this, didn't I?" Natsuki said as she buried her face in her hands, trying to hide how hard she was blushing. "Just-just kill me now, save me the embarrassment."

"Well, I would," Monika began. "But you guys got kinda mad when I did that."

MoNatSaYuri: "Alright, alright…"
I give up on Natsuki's weird logic and dismiss the conversation.
Yuri returns to the table, carrying a tea set.
She carefully place a teacup in front of each of us before setting down the teapot next to the cupcake tray.
MoNatSaYuri: "You keep a whole tea set in this classroom?"

"And a library of manga." Yuri said. "And a psychopath who can warp reality. Which is weirder?" As expected, Monika was shaking her head in her hands.

Yuri: "Don't worry, the teachers gave us permission."

"Well, for the first two anyway." Yuri said.

Yuri: "After all, doesn't a hot cup of tea help you enjoy a good book?"

"'Don't know, never tried it.'" Natsuki said in MoNatSaYuri's voice.

"What, drinking while reading?" Yuri asked.

"'Reading.'"

MoNatSaYuri: "Ah… I-I guess…"
Monika: "Ehehe, don't let yourself get intimidated, Yuri's just trying to impress you."

"And doing a better job then you." Yuri snarked.

Yuri: "Eh?! T-That's not…"
Insulted, Yuri looks away.
Yuri: "I meant that, you know…"
MoNatSaYuri: "I believe you."
MoNatSaYuri: "Well, tea and reading might not be a pastime for me, but I at least enjoy tea."
Yuri: "I'm glad."

"'Huh, what is this?'" Sayori said in MoNatSaYuri's voice. "'This tastes like boiled leaf juice.'"

"That's what tea is." Yuri said.

Yuri faintly smiles to herself in relief.
Monika raises an eyebrow, then smiles at me.
Monika: "So, what made you consider the Literature Club?"

"'My best friend'/'Cupcakes.'" Sayori and Natsuki said at the same time, before looking between each other.

"'It was a mixture of the two.'" Sayori said.

MoNatSaYuri: "Um…"
I was afraid of this question.
Something tells me I shouldn't tell Monika that I was practically dragged here by Sayori.
MoNatSaYuri: "Well, I haven't joined any clubs yet, and Sayori seemed really happy here, so…"

"Don't worry, she won't be for long." Natsuki said.

Monika: "That's okay! Don't be embarrassed!"
Monika: "We'll make sure you feel right at home, okay?"

"If I wanted that, I'd just go home." Natsuki stated.

Monika: "As president of the Literature Club, it's my duty to make the club fun and exciting for everyone!"

"And before any of you say anything," Monika began. "Yes, I am aware at how badly and how quickly I failed at that."

"Hey, don't beat yourself up like that, pres." Natsuki began. "I mean, it was exciting, at least… Just for all the wrong reasons."

MoNatSaYuri: "Monika, I'm surprised."
MoNatSaYuri: "How come you decided to start your own club?"

"Because she discovered that if she did so, she would gain the ability to warp reality, and so she set off on a mission to prove that if God existed, he's anything but kind." Natsuki said.

"Natsuki, please, have some restraint." Yuri countered. "She just really enjoys lording her power over others, the reality altering abilities were just a bonus."

"No, please Yuri, you'll make me blush." Monika groaned.

MoNatSaYuri: "You could probably be a board member for any of the major clubs."
MoNatSaYuri: "Weren't you a leader of the debate club last year?"
Monika: "Ahaha, well, you know…"

"More than you'd think." Natsuki and Sayori stated.

Monika: "To be honest, I can't stand all the politics around the major clubs."
Monika: "It feels like nothing but arguing about the budget and publicity and how to prepare for events…"

"Aren't we gonna argue about that stuff later down the line?" Sayori asked.

"W-well…" Monika began.

"Everything save budget." Natsuki said.

Monika: "I'd much rather take something I personally enjoy and make something special out of it."

"Like murder?" Yuri asked as Natsuki put a hand to her chin.

"Actually, come to think of it, wasn't there something between MC and Sayori about how she couldn't afford to buy a snack?" Natsuki asked.

"Yeah, but I wasn't there for it." Monika said.

"Still, you got away from all that stuff about as well as a boomerang." Sayori said.

Monika: "And if it encourages others to get into literature, then I'm fulfilling that dream!"

"Oh, this game will drive people to read books, all right." Natsuki said with a chuckle.

Sayori: "Monika really is a great leader!"

"Give it a few days." Everyone sans Monika said in unison.

Yuri also nods in agreement.

"Also, past me, get your hand away from Monika's." Sayori said.

MoNatSaYuri: "Then I'm surprised there aren't more people in the club yet."
MoNatSaYuri: "It must be hard to start a new club."

"You have no idea." Natsuki sighed. "We tried to start a 'We All Hate Monika' club, but we had to disband cause we didn't have enough members. So now we're just kinda the 'We All Hate Monika Club that Sometimes Reads and Writes Poems.'"

"Or as I like to call it, the…!" Sayori began before reciting what Natsuki just said in her head. "WAH-MC-t-S-R-a-W-P."

"Just rolls off the tongue, doesn't it?" Yuri stated.

Monika: "You could put it that way."
Monika: "Not many people are very interested in putting out all the effort to start something brand new…"
Monika: "Especially when it's something that doesn't grab your attention, like literature."
Monika: "You have to work hard to convince people that you're both fun and worthwhile."
Monika: "But it makes school events, like the festival, that much more important."

"Well, there's preparing for events." Yuri said.

Monika: "I'm confident that we can all really grow this club before we graduate!"

"But we'll need to work hard!" Sayori began. "Because we only have shmifhmhm years left."

Monika: "Right everyone?"
Sayori: "Yeah!"
Yuri: "We'll do are best."
Natsuki: "You know it!"

"You know, this is actually kinda funny in hindsight." Yuri chuckled. "Because by the end of the game, the number of club members goes down multiple times."

"That it does!" Natsuki laughed as she leaned towards Monika. "How does it feel to get kicked out of your own club, Monika!?"

"I'm your president again." Monika noted.

"How does it feel!?"

Everyone enthusiastically agrees.
Such different girls, all interested in the same goal…

"Not by a long shot." Natsuki laughed.

Monika must have worked really hard to just find these three.
Maybe that's why they were all so delighted at the idea of a new member joining.

"I mean, I was kinda planning on turning the club into an orgy, but…" Natsuki joked, earning blushing cheeks and disgusted looks from the rest of the club.

"Eh…"

Though I still don't really know if I can keep up with their level of enthusiasm about literature…
Yuri: "So, MoNatSaYuri, what kinds of things do you like to read?"
MoNatSaYuri: "Well… Ah…"
Considering how little I've read these past few years, I don't really have a good way of answering that.

"'Porn.'" Natsuki said, earning a round of laughter from Sayori, and even a few chuckles from Yuri.

MoNatSaYuri: "…Manga…"

"I mean, those are pretty much the same thing." Yuri said.

Natsuki quickly lifted a finger, scowling at the purple-haired girl, ready to yell her ear off before bringing it back down. "Eh, it's kinda true, I guess."

I mutter quietly to myself, half joking.
Natsuki's head suddenly perks up.
Looks like she wants to say something, but she keeps quiet.
Yuri: "N-not much of a reader, I guess…"
MoNatSaYuri: "…Well, that can change…"
What am I saying?
I spoke without thinking after seeing Yuri's sad smile.

"Yeah, something tells me you do that a lot." Natsuki said.

MoNatSaYuri: "Anyway, what about you, Yuri?"
Yuri: "Well, let's see…"
Yuri traces the rim of her teacup with her finger.

"Oh, right, I forgot we were at a table." Yuri said.

Yuri: "My favorites are usually novels that build deep and complex fantasy worlds."
Yuri: "The level of creativity and craftsmanship behind them is amazing to me."
Yuri: "And telling a good story in such a foreign world is equally impressive."
Yuri goes on, clearly passionate about her reading.
She seemed so reserved and timid since the moment I walked in, but it's obvious by the way her eyes light up that she finds her comfort in the world of books, not people.

"Now I'm just thinking of that episode of the Twilight Zone where that guy is the last man alive with a library full of books." Sayori chuckles.

"But unlike Henry Bemis, my vision is 20/20." Yuri stated.

"And then your eyes fall out." Natsuki said.

"And that is why we invented audio books." Yuri said.

"And then your ears fall off."

"W-well, it's a good thing I can read braille."

"And there goes your hands."

"'It's not fair!'" Yuri joked before chuckling.

Yuri: "But you know, I like a lot of things."
Yuri: "Stories with deep psychological elements usually immerse me as well."
Yuri: "Isn't it amazing how a writer can so deliberately take advantage of your own lack of imagination to completely throw you for a loop."

"I just remembered…" Natsuki began. "We're gonna need to go through this all twice."

"Guess we're going to need to be more conservative with our jokes?" Yuri asked.

Yuri: "Anyway, I've been reading a lot of horror lately…"

"Huh, weird, I've been playing a lot of horror lately." Natsuki said.

MoNatSaYuri: "Ah, I read a horror book once…"

"'Unfortunately, it was the novelization of Jeff the Killer.'" Natsuki said. "'There were really too many problems for me to count, and I couldn't call it scary at the end of the day.'"

I desperately grasp something I can relate to at the minimal level.
At this rate, Yuri might as well be having a conversation with a rock.

"I mean, if we went by intelligence…" Monika said.

Monika: "Really? I wouldn't have expected that, Yuri."
Monika: "For someone as gentle as you."
Yuri: "I guess you could say that."
Yuri: "But if a story makes me think, or takes me to another world, then I really can't put it down."
Yuri: "Surreal horror is often very successful at changing the way you look at the world, if only for just a brief moment.
Natsuki: "Eh, I hate horror…"

"And after tackling three different horror games for this channel, I can safely say that hasn't change." Natsuki said before the video ended.

And thus ends another episode of DDLC Plays DDLC. I am legitimately surprised how quickly I managed to write this chapter, it only took me a few hours to get to around the first chapter's length, even when I didn't have access to the transcripts for the game, meaning I had to copy the dialogue straight from the Game Grump's playthrough of it. Admittedly, that's not too big a problem – especially given a joke I have planned – and I'm sure I can use videos of the other routes in order to circumvent the fact that the original collection of transcripts I was using has been overtaken by the Monika After Story mod.

Also, fair warning to any fans of Monika reading this, the jokes at her expense aren't gonna stop anytime soon, or ever for that matter. I stand strong by my statement that Monika is worst girl and I shall enjoy the opportunity to snark at each and every line she speaks throughout this series.