A/N: Hello loyal readers…Next chapter's out…and I promise a twist. One reviewer already guessed it, but for some of you it may be a surprise. Enjoy and review!
Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill.
Chapter Sixteen: Caught with Your Pants Up
February 5th 2006
Hell. I'm in hell. There's a constant pounding in my head and a sharp pain behind my eyes. Speaking of my eyes, they're glued shut, but I can feel the light gathering around me. What the hell happened last night? I remember going to the bar. I remember drinking, a lot. The last thing I remember is ordering Margaritas. The rest of the night is a total blur. I groan loudly, still refusing to open my eyes and turn on my side flopping my arm over on Rachel.
"Oof," Rachel grunts. Only that doesn't sound like Rachel. Because Rachel doesn't have a deep voice. And Rachel has breasts. This person has a flat chest.
"Rachel?" I mumble, opening my eyes. The sight before me makes my current headache increase ten fold. I close my eyes and rub them a few times, hoping the site will disappear when I open them again. It doesn't. I shake the figure next to me, trying to wake them up and get some answers. He just mutters some incoherent words and rolls over so his arm is encompassing my stomach.
"Keller!" I hiss pushing his arm off.
"What?" he groans, opening his eyes. He looks at me skeptically, "Goldilocks?"
"Chris, what are you doing in my bed?" I ask, dreading the answer.
"Do you even have to ask?" Chris smirks, rolling back on his back.
"We didn't!" I say, widening my eyes.
"I hope not. I have a girlfriend in New York." He shuts his eyes and puts his hands over his face, "Does it feel like a large truck ran over your brain?"
"Yes!" I yell.
"Damn it, woman! Don't do that," he curses, "I just said I have a headache."
"Chris…" I trail off.
"Don't worry, Peyton," he says, "I don't think we did it. I'm pretty sure I still have my pants on." I pull the covers off my body. Sure enough I'm still dressed, except for my shirt.
"Where the hell is my shirt?" Chris eyes my bare stomach.
"You were hot so you pulled it off," he says, his eyes lingering a little too long on my cleavage, "That's the last thing I remember." I scoot to the edge of the bed and swing my legs over the side. Sure enough there's my shirt lying on the floor. I quickly throw it on.
"Hey! I was enjoying the view." I glare at him, before stumbling to the door. I need some coffee. My throat feels like it's slowly closing in on itself. I notice that there's someone passed out in front of my vanity. It's Bevin. Chris has rolled back on his side and it looks like he's going back to bed. I reach the door just as someone approaches from the other side. Lucas.
"Luke?" I ask.
"Hey, you have three people passed out in your living room," he says.
"Not surprising," I say, trying to lead him away. I need to get him out of here now before he notices-
"Is Chris Keller in your bed?" he asks. I look at him blankly. Not exactly something I can deny.
"Yeah," I sigh, "Listen Luke-"
"Hi, Lucas. How are you?" Chris mutters, "Peyton, sweetie, get back to bed. I'm cold and I need you to warm me up."
"It's ok, Peyton," he says sadly. His eyes look so painful, "I'm used to this. It seems like every Tree Hill girl winds up in his bed."
"Actually I wound up in hers," Chris says, "And I wound up in Brooke's too."
"Chris, shut up!" I say rolling my eyes, "Luke, I didn't sleep with him. I wouldn't do that."
"It's really ok, Peyt," he says. His face tells a different story. I begin to panic. I cannot lose him again, especially over something I didn't do.
"No! Look!" I say, "Bevin's passed out there too! And Chris is still dressed, see!" I pull the covers off his body.
"Hey!" he says pulling the covers back over him, "What if I had been naked?"
"You said you were still dressed."
"I said I thought I was. What if I had been wrong?" Chris asked.
"Lovers quarrel," Lucas says raising an eyebrow.
"As if," Chris mutters, "Peyton didn't sleep with me. I promise you she's not like your last girlfriend. She spent the whole night praising her Lukey."
"Your Lukey?" Lucas smirks looking at me.
"My Lukey?" I say, blushing profusely. I would never call Luke that.
"Yeah, quite sickening actually," Chris whispers, "I'm going to get back to bed now. Why don't you two continue your little conversation someplace else?" I motion to Lucas to wait one second and tip toe behind Chris, who has his eyes closed.
"Goodnight Chris!" I yell in his ear. It hurts me just as much to be speaking this loud, but it's well worth it. He gasps in shock and pulls the covers over his head.
"Bitch," he mutters from underneath them. I smirk before leading Lucas downstairs and outside to the porch. He leans on the railing while I sit in the porch bench.
"I'm sorry about all of this," I say rubbing my temples, "It was a long night last night."
"Hung over?" he asks, smirking.
"Just a bit," I say, my voice cracking, "And it looks as though I smoked too much too."
"You said you'd quit," he says quietly.
"I will now. I feel disgusting."
"I would too if I slept in the same bed as Chris Keller," he says. I look at him seriously.
"You believe me, right?" I say, the worry painfully evident in my voice, "I didn't have sex with Chris Keller."
"I believe you, Peyton," he says, solemnly, "I know you wouldn't do that to me after the whole Brooke thing. I just find it weird that you guys slept in the same bed, drunk and didn't do anything." I bite my lip.
"I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but I'm in love with you," I say simply, "No amount of alcohol will make me forget that." He looks at me and a smile spreads across his face before he looks down. He seems relieved to hear it, but I can also tell he doesn't know how to answer that so I quickly change the subject, "So, what brings you here?"
"Skillz," he says, shoving his hands into his pockets.
"What about him?"
"He wants to get back with Bevin, but he doesn't know where to start. I said that I'd talk to you seeing how close you and Bevin are." I nod my head and frown internally. Here I thought he was coming to see me. I probably shouldn't have blurted out that whole 'I'm in love with you' thing, huh?
"I know Bevin wants Skillz back too. I think the best way to get them back together is make them sit down and talk it all out," I say rationally, "We could have them meet each other at your mom's café."
"That's a good idea."
"Tomorrow?" I ask, "I can have Bevin cleaned up by then."
"No, Skillz doesn't get back from Atlanta until Saturday."
"Saturday then?"
"Sure. I'll call him and let him know," Lucas says. We sit there in silence for a moment. I stretch my arms over my head and feel a rush of dizziness pass over me. I fall a little to the side.
"You ok there?" he asks in a voice that hold concern and amusement.
"Dizzy," I admit, "And I really need a shower."
"Yeah, you smell like cigarettes."
"I smoked almost a whole pack last night," I say looking down at my hands.
"Why, Peyt? You were doing so good."
"I don't know. I just kind of needed a night to let go."
"Don't you let go every night?" My eyes narrow at him. For someone who supposedly understands me, he's doing a terrible job.
"You don't get it, do you?" I huff, "Life's not easy for me, ok? Everyday is different. Some days I feel great. Other days my life is a total mess. And on those days I need something."
"Something doesn't have to be cigarettes and alcohol."
"It doesn't have to but it is," I say rubbing my temples.
"I don't get it," Luke says softly, "But I'm here for you."
"Sure you are," I whisper back, closing my eyes.
"I don't know what you want me to say." I feel the tears leaking out of my eyes now. Sometimes I wonder what makes me so naïve when it comes to Lucas Scott.
"Nothing," I shake my head and stand up, "I'll see you later, Luke."
"Peyt," he says reaching for my arm, but I quickly pull back from his grasp.
"Let me know if Skillz's ok with Saturday." I'm building up my walls again. I can feel it and I think he senses it too.
"No," he says firmly grabbing my shoulders.
"Fine, don't call me. I don't care," I say somewhat sarcastically.
"Peyton, don't do this," he says, "Don't pull away from me just because I don't know what to do. I'm trying to get this. I'm trying to understand you and why you're like this! I'm trying to figure out where my heart's at. But if you pull away from me, we're going to wind up right back at square one!"
"We moved off square one?" I say with a small smirk. He doesn't look too amused. I sigh and give him the benefit of the doubt. "I drank and smoked last night because I was afraid."
"Afraid of what?"
"Afraid of the idea that you may not be with me," I whisper timidly. I feel so weak and emotionally attached just saying it, "I never thought about it. After I got my hopes up, I just kept thinking what if you don't want me and then things between us just get weird. What if we wind up not even being friends? What if you go back to Brooke-"
"That won't happen."
"I don't know that though," I say quickly, "I don't know what's going on inside your head, Lucas."
"Well that's the thing," he says, "I don't either. All I know is that I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to say how I feel if I'm not sure about it. I need you to wait for me and at the same time, I need you to be safe."
"Luke, it was one night."
"One night is all it takes to fall into a pit." He's right. My casual drinking and smoking started as a once and a while thing.
"I'll be safe," I say, looking into his eyes, "No cigarettes. No alcohol."
"That's my girl," he says giving me a big hug, "I've got get back to the café. My mom needs my help."
"Ok," I smile slowly pulling out of his embrace, "Call me about Skillz." He nods and leaves. I go back inside and take a shower. When I come out, Rachel is standing at the door of my room.
"You didn't sleep with him," she says, sipping her decaf coffee. I look around her and find Chris still curled up in a ball in my bed.
"That's what he said too," I say.
"You were hammered last night."
"I know. I'm quitting though. No more vices." Rachel snorts in disbelief.
"I'll believe it when I see it."
"I'm not that bad," I say rolling my eyes.
"Last night you were."
"Yeah but that was last night," I say thinking about last night, "And hell Rachel, even you threw back a shot."
"I did not," Rachel says raising her eyebrow.
"Yeah you did. You had one of the cokes Chris ordered." As soon as the words are out of my mouth, Rachel's jaw drops.
"Those had alcohol in them" Rachel exclaims, throwing her hands over her mouth, "I totally don't remember Chris saying that."
"Yeah, he ordered rum and cokes and you drank it. I thought you knew…" I trail off as the tears start to collect in the corners of her eyes. "Hey, Rach, I know you're really into this new, clean life, but one drink's no big deal."
"Yes it is!" she sobs, collapsing on the floor in a pile, "I'm such an idiot!"
"What's wrong?" I ask. She looks at me with pained eyes. I can tell she doesn't want to tell me. "Come on, Rachel. I thought we were honest with each other. When all that shit happened with Lucas, you were the first person I opened up to." She turns her head to the side so she's not looking at me and rests her head against the wall.
"I'm pregnant," she whispers.
"What?" I ask, hesitantly. I'm thinking I heard her wrong.
"I'm a seventeen year old girl who's pregnant with a dead man's child," she says a little louder.
"Who knows?" It's the first thing I can think of to say.
"Just Mouth. He was there at the hospital when they brought in my test results."
"How far along are you?"
"Ten Weeks."
"So that's why you don't drink?" I ask.
"Yes," she says quietly, "And those medications I've been taking aren't for the accident. They're vitamins for pregnancy."
"That explains a lot. The tiredness. The positive outlook on life."
"Well," she says softly, wiping her tears and letting out a small chuckle "I'm going to be a mommy."
"Rach, why didn't you tell Bev and me about this before? We'd have to find out eventually."
"I know but I was putting it off. You and Bevin had so many problems of your own. I didn't want you guys worrying about me."
"That's what friends do, Rachel. They worry."
"I never had friends before really. Just acquaintances. I guess I'm not used to having them."
"Well you do now," I say giving her a hug. Rachel as a mommy. Now there's something I didn't see coming, "How were you going to keep this from everyone else?"
"I figured by the time we graduated I'd only be about five months."
"Are you going to tell Nathan and Deb?" She laughs a little.
"You're just full of questions, aren't you?"
"This is a lot to take in. I want to know everything," I say seriously, "So are you?"
"I don't know. I was hoping I could avoid that."
"You have to," I say seriously. She looks away and shrugs.
"We'll see."
"So how bad is it that you drank?"
"I don't know. If you'd like, you could come with me tomorrow to my doctor's appointment. Mouth's got some family reunion up in Norfolk."
"I'd love to go." We sit in total silence. It's a lot to take in. Your best friend's pregnant with a dead man's child. Oh and that dead man happens to be your ex-boyfriend's uncle. Not to mention, your best friend just drank because you forced her to come hang out with you.
"Congratulations," I say breaking the silence, "You're going to make a great mother."
"Thanks, Peyton. I'm not so sure about that though."
"You will be," I say with a smile, "And I'm sorry about last night."
"It's ok," she says, "My baby's a fighter." She pats her stomach. "It survived the car crash and my drinking at the wedding. The doctors said that they were shocked it held on."
"Did it affect the baby at all?"
"I won't know until its born. It could be special needs or have physical defects. I could lose it."
"That's an awful lot to carry on your shoulders."
"That's life, right? You ought to know all about it, Peyt." We both laugh a little.
"We just can't catch a break, can we, Rach?"