Chapter nine
Jude sat upstairs of G-Major, surrounded by Portia and two other women, who were all busy to get her fitted into the clothes. She had agreed to make a short cameo in a horror movie, despite having a mortifying fear for those. Also she had promised to sing the theme song, and after recording most of it this morning, she was happy she could finally leave the studio behind for a little while.
It had been three days since the heated discussion with Tommy, and since then he was literally moping. He refused to look at her, avoided as precisely as possible to see her outside the studio walls and when she did cross his way, he simply turned away from her. It was getting ridiculous, and Jude wondered if she had acted the same way in the first days after the Sommy-Sex-Debacle, as Fiona had nicely titled it.
"Finally a moment alone," Portia said when she sat down next to Jude, making final adjustments to the sleeve of her outfit. "You've got to tell me – Did you really give…you know what…to David? In Tommy's studio nonetheless?"
"Why is everyone calling it Tommy's studio?" Jude was getting cranky over that fact. "It's a room he happens to use often, but it's not his studio!"
"Why does it matter?" Portia looked confused and Jude couldn't hold it against her. She wasn't sure herself why it mattered, it just did.
"Wait – how do you know?"
"The studio is made of glass walls! A moment before you got caught, Fiona walked by and saw the very obvious gestures you were making. I have to admit, I'd have never believed you'd do that. Not just in the studio, but in general. Guess I did think you were the naive, innocent little girl."
"And now I'm not any longer?" Not that Jude was an expert in sexual matters, but it was a common fact that blow-jobs weren't that shocking in today's society anymore. Ever since Sex and the City had premiered, it was even an open topic in everyday talks — not that she knew herself, but from overhearing Sadie and her friends. Pre-'Tommy and Sadie', that was. Now Jude could hardly find interest in overhearing those talks. She didn't need to know what they were doing when she wasn't there.
"I'm just saying you come off as the young, naive sort of girl that wishes of a perfect first time. Not at all like someone who'd give head in public!"
"It wasn't public, and it wasn't real," Jude confessed in annoyance. "David wanted to irk Tommy and so he suggested I'd fake it. He saw them coming towards the studio. David's fly was zipped, and my mouth was closed. But, if you tell Tommy…"
"Never," Portia grinned, now even more astounded. "You're not only a bad girl, you're also learning how to handle Tom Quincy. Can't say I'm not a little envious. I never managed to be that cool around him. I was head over heals in love with him, so I forgave him almost everything."
Jude took a long glance at Portia while she continued to stitch the sleeve. Out of nowhere she felt a tiny little bit proud of herself for being able to say 'no' to Tommy. She was head over– No, she used to be head over heals in love with him, too and yet she'd have never allowed him to do whatever he wanted without paying the consequences. Maybe she wasn't the groupie everyone had seen in her. "Can I ask you something strange? You don't have to answer if you don't want to."
"Go ahead," Portia agreed.
"I don't really have anyone else to ask. Sadie is my sister, Kwest is Tommy's best friend and so would tell all, and David is my boyfriend and…well, I'm starting to believe he likes annoying Tommy, so I'm not sure he'd tell me the truth, anyway." Jude's eyes found a loose strand of material on her dress and focused on it as if it were the most interesting thing in the world. "Do you think Tommy finds me attractive? In the way that…he'd…pursue a sexual affair with me?"
"That's a weird question. I thought you were over him?"
"Oh I am. That's not why I ask. It's these things he keeps saying. We were having this fight and he made some strange remarks. It sounded suddenly all so sexual and then he warned me I should be careful with what I say. I know he's not feeling anything for me, but I'm starting to believe he wants me. If only because I'm having someone else now."
"Would you want him to want you?"
"Swear you will never say this to anyone," Jude demanded sternly, looking over her shoulder to see if they really were alone.
Portia looked sincere. "I promise."
"I don't know. I mean…I don't want to. Obviously I want to be with David. But, when he says these things it makes me feel strange. We're not even having real things to argue about, and I know it would be the smartest thing to just turn around and leave him alone, but I can't. I literally can't. It's like I have this need to object to him. And then those stupid things bubble up in me and…" Jude looked down again, feeling like an idiot for she was actually speaking out. "Have you noticed how a man's breathing changes? When it's getting quicker? I never did that before, and last night with Tommy I did."
"You are so far from over him," Portia commented with a grin, "that it's almost cute how you claim you are. I'm not judging. I've been there. I've felt the same. The breathing-thing is harmless. Wait until you notice how he smells differently after you two have been together and how that makes you want him all over again. It's natural. To answer your question, yes. Tommy would sleep with you. You'd be surprised just how much he wants to. You're out of bounds. But, and that's the sad part, I'm doubting he'd be with you. As a boyfriend. I'm not even saying he's not feeling anything for y-"
"He's not," Jude interrupted. She had been there. She knew he wasn't returning her feelings. The feelings she used to have.
"As I was saying, even if he were in love with you, he's scared of relationships. I think he's with Sadie because she can't harm him. She's pretty, entertaining and willing. But, she's never going to win his heart. And you are young. He has hurt you before, and he knows that."
"So he's probably just wanting me because he can't have me."
"Don't take this the wrong way, Jude. But, I do believe he could have you if he wanted to. I've seen the way you still look at him. I know his charms. I've fallen for him. I knew he was a player, and a cheater, and a reckless arrogant bastard at that time, but the moment he said he wanted me, I was his. That's the sucky part about being in love, whether you want or not. So my advice: Don't give in. It'll only leave you heartbroken."
"Thanks," Jude told with a sad smile. "Guess I just needed to hear that." Tommy's weird behavior had confused her for days now. She couldn't deny he was acting differently around her; he looked differently at her. Now Portia confirmed her own thoughts and she was right. Tommy had hurt her before, and there was a reason she wanted to get over him.
###
"Jude." Tommy came to an abrupt halt in front of the coffee shop, having not expected to see her here. "I thought you went home because you weren't feeling well."
"Yeah well – don't tell Darius that I lied," she sheepishly admitted. "I just needed to be away from…"
"Me?" He continued when he noticed how she didn't finish but blushed instead. "It's okay. I can handle it when someone doesn't want to be around me," he assured. He pretended to be sad, looking so heartbroken. Jude just had to laugh.
"It's not you. It's… Maybe it is you."
"Oh." He found himself stunned by the significant feeling of unhappiness that comment left behind. "Well, now I'm here and I was planning on going inside to have my own time away from G-Major and what else, so…how about I invite you for a coffee and you let me convince you I'm not that bad of a companion." To persuade her, he tugged his lips upwards in his most charming smile.
Jude couldn't help but remember Portia's words. He was really hard to resist if he wanted to. But, she wouldn't allow all this confusion and awkwardness to dominate their relationship any longer, and so she pushed the door open. "Shall we then?"
"We shall," he agreed, following her inside.
Once settled into a booth, Tommy's face turned a serious shade. "I'm sorry for last week. I had no right to…to judge or whatever it was I did. You're with him and of course that means…doing stuff…and…"
Jude started giggling, finding it insanely amusing how hard it was for him to even speak out what he thought she had done. "It's called a blow-job."
His head snapped up, a warning shimmer in his eyes. "Can we not talk about that here? Or at least, can we not speak it out here? You never know who else is listening. I don't want this to be tomorrow's cover story."
"I do think it would not be that big of a shock to find out what a girl and a boy are doing when they date," she teased. "See if I told the world that you, Canada's biggest playboy, are not having sex with your girlfriend, that'd be probably a bigger headline."
"What makes you so sure you'd be telling the truth," he wondered. Sure, it was the truth, but still.
"Would it be a lie?" She countered.
"I'm not answering," he declared.
"Coward. What are you afraid off?"
"Why do you want to know?"
"I don't. I'm just wondering why you're making such a big deal of hiding the truth."
"I'm not hiding anything. I'm not seeing the sense in baring my private life to you."
"Funny," she told him, "for you seem to be very interested in my private life recently."
"Are we back to fighting?"
"Who is fighting? I'm simply asking questions."
"Questions you've no right to ask."
"I didn't know I needed permission to ask."
"Not to ask in general," he corrected, "but if I asked you about your sex life, you'd be annoyed, too."
"What makes you think I have a sex life?"
"The fact that I saw you having one? Twice," He added almost bitterly.
"Why is important that you saw me and David in your studio?"
"What?" He groaned. "I thought we were past that!"
"No, we aren't. This is a good moment to ask, seeing as you can neither get too angry because that would make you show up on page one, but you also can't count to be saved by Kwest or anyone else. Just you and me, Quincy. Why is it so important that it is your studio?"
"It's not. It' just…it's just a studio." He gave a smug expression, countering with her own words.
Jude rolled her eyes. "The Tommy I remember wasn't so scared about being bold. Or was three days ago the best you got in being bold? The whole 'I don't need your generosity to cum in a mouth'-thing?"
Had he really said that? Damn, how could he! Fine, she wanted bold? She was right. He did not back down in front of someone who was still in High School. She could have bold! "Because it's my studio. I don't want my girl doing things like that in a room where I have to work in, because it is not something I can easily get out of my head!"
"Your girl?" She purposely ignored what only a few months ago she'd have considered a sign of his hidden affection. Now she knew it was just his arrogant possessiveness. And aside that, he had a new girl now! "You gave up on that claim the moment you put your dick into my sister!"
He had a horrible daydream just then, picturing dozens of reporters sitting in that coffee shop, all busy transcribing Jude's and his words. If only one would have caught her last comment, they'd be making the evening news! "Speak quietly!"
"Geez," Jude shot in annoyance. "For God's sake Quincy, get over the page one-thing." Standing up, suddenly filled with fire, she called through the whole shop: "Tom Quincy is having an unfulfilled sexual relationship with Sadie Harrison!" When she sat down, she saw Tommy's eyes glaring at her with an intensity they had never done before. Jude couldn't care less. "Now that that's out of the way let's be really straight. You fucked her on my couch, and you didn't care either!"
Tommy, who was busy sending rows of apologetic glances towards everyone who was staring at them, mumbled half-heartedly, "I apologized more than enough for that night!"
Jude however hardly shared that opinion. "You want me to apologize for what I did?" she twisted his words.
He hadn't asked for that, but now that she offered, he nodded, "It would be fair. You crossed a line like I did. You know that you and I have a-"
"Stop right there," she warned fiercely, eyes unbreakably hard. "I have not crossed any line! I did something you weren't supposed to see, I admit to that. I should have done it in a more private place, I admit that too. But, I did not cross a line that is in any way related to what you and I have as a relationship. Past, or not! You're dating my sister if I may remind you, and as long as she isn't involved in mine and David's actions, you better stay out of it!"
"Is it that easy for you?"
Jude was beginning to shake in anger. What was happening? She was done with all that. All those irritating emotions, all the hurt of her broken heart, all the feelings he didn't return. She had finished with that. He had made her finish with that, and suddenly he had nothing better to do than make her feel shamefaced for having been with someone else? "Are you kidding me?"
"Why?" He was neither furious, nor annoyed but fully direct and sincere. "You know what I'm talking about. You and I have a past and that's not making you the slightest bit feel bad for having done what you did in my studio?"
Jude took the Styrofoam container, stood up and while for a split second he feared she'd pour it over his head, she simply walked out on him.
###
"Asshole," she muttered angrily, kicking pebbles and whatever else was plastering on the pavement on her way to – where was she even going? Jude looked up, sunglasses on to hide the fury in her eyes from everyone else who passed her, and searched for a street sign. Willowy-Avenue. Great, she thought. Two miles away from G-Major and seven away from home. She made a mental note to walk around one and the same block the next time she was pissed off, instead of walking straight ahead into the unknown.
Just when she was about to call a cab, deliberately refusing to even consider walking home, for she had sure as hell walked enough today, a flashy car appeared next to her. "Jude," the driver called and she realized it was Tommy.
"Go away, Quincy!"
"No. It's getting late and you're nowhere near home. Let me drive you."
"Did you follow me?"
"As a matter of fact I was on my way home, but then I saw this raging blonde kicking things in front of her and I feared if I don't have pity for you, you'll end up hurting someone else's car or something. Get in," he said, ordering.
That tone was just what Jude needed. "You don't get to tell me what or what not I do! And it's not late; it's barely six pm! I've stopped kicking things, you can leave now." Her eyes finally caught the car and she rolled her orbs so hard even Tommy noticed it though being meters away.
"Another new car?"
"It's an Aston Martin. Got it this morning. It's James Bond's car. I'm thinking about buying it."
"Whoo," Jude mocked. "Can it do any tricks, like vanishing? Preferably with its driver," she added sarcastically. "Though if it just swallowed you, I'd be happy already."
"Just get in, Jude." He heard cars behind him starting to honk, and it stretched his nerves thin. Jude grinned at him and waved, walking away.
He finally drove off, and just when Jude's mood began to rise she saw him coming around the corner. By foot this time. Her mood hit rock bottom. "What on earth do you not understand when I tell you to leave?"
"I understood you just well," he assured with that cocky smirk that she wanted to kick off his face just then, "I chose to ignore your plea. Though I don't usually do that with women."
"This is not the right moment to be smug. I'm angry with you, Tommy. And if you keep standing there, I'm going to kick the pebble in front of me so hart it'll leave a hole in your nuts when it hits you!"
He sighed deeply, stepped aside, which made Jude smirk, and then he smiled too. But not in his usually arrogant way. This one was full of…well, it was just a different smile. One could almost call it alluring. Convincing, even. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said it. I know I can't compare what you did to what I did. And I shouldn't have brought our past up."
She figured he was trying to handle her again. There was no way he suddenly believed what he was saying. Roughly pulling her sunglasses off, she shot arrows at him with her eyes. "We don't have a past, Tommy! There's me, having acted like a lovesick puppy around you, and there's you having enjoyed, but not cared for it. That's all there is. The rest is just friendship! Now that we've clarified it – leave!"
"No. Fine, you don't want to talk about it, let's talk about something else." He followed her when she started walking again, completely aware he was infuriating her. "How did it feel to have his cock in your mouth?"
Jude stopped instantly, looking so harshly at him that he wondered for a moment if he could actually see the steam she sure had inside coming out of her ears. He'd probably have to drown a full bottle of Whiskey later to forget the fact he had said those words, to Jude no less, but he finally had her attention. "What, Harrison? Come on – seems you and I talk a lot about sex lately so why not be honest about it all? How did it feel?"
He wanted to laugh at her reaction. She was heaving in utter rage, eyes dark, breathing barely controlled and fists hard next to her, her knuckles already white. "You're walking on fire, Tommy," she seethed, as if to warn him. "Last chance to take back what you just said!"
"Why should I?" he irked further, figuring she'd cave any second and back out. "I'm interested. You don't want to talk about your feelings, I get that. Let's talk about what really matters. How was it?"
"You wanted it," she reminded, not at all willing to admit defeat, and so she got into his face while her nails drew blood in her palms. "His cock was huge and pink and delicious! He loves when I rake my teeth along his flesh, or give his sac a squeeze. He also loves when I ride him hard and fast. I already have sore nipples because he tends to lose himself in the pleasure I give him, and then bites! Not that I mind if he gets a little rough. But, I doubt you know what I mean, given the poor missionary you delivered when I caught you in my sister!" Her cheeks were flushed, not by embarrassment, but by sheer agitation, and her respiration was ragged as if she'd have just run a marathon.
Tommy's eyes were flaring, as if liquid anger was boiling in them, the lines in his face hard. As something else was getting, but he had no control about that! He couldn't believe she had said that. Yes, he had baited her but had he expected that little rant? Hell no! How did she even know all those things? Wasn't she supposed to be a virgin? Feeling his own control running out, he experienced unknown levels of acrimony and want. The latter he tried to black out. There was no way he'd let her win this. "That good, huh?" He leaned closer to her.
"Better," she snarled through gritted teeth.
He could smell the coffee in her breath, and the sugar from the gummy bears he had seen her eating earlier. He could feel the heat coming from her, the warm day was only worsening it. There were little sparks exploding in her eyes, shining, her skin was glowing – in anger, he was sure. Suddenly, something in him snapped and his arms pulled her hard against his chest, feeling the curves of her front molding along his own chest while he slammed his lips on hers. She didn't fight him, but for a moment just stood stiff. His tongue thrust past her lips and all of sudden he found her responding. Slender arms wrapped tightly around his neck, lips hungrily moving in sync with his.
He couldn't stop. He wanted to. He knew it was wrong, it was probably the last nail in their friendship's coffin, but for the life of him he couldn't stop drinking in her mouth. His tongue licked everywhere. The roof of her mouth, the underside of her tongue, her teeth, maybe even her tonsils. He was on fire and had it not been for the fact that they were in the middle of the street – a fact he only dimly recalled– he'd have long let his hands roam other parts of her. He was hard as a rock, and he knew she must feel it. It fueled his passion even more that she wasn't pulling away, but mirroring his almost frightening desire with equal force, pushing herself closer into his arms with every passing second.
Her lower belly rubbed along the impressive bulge in his pants, and she moaned into his mouth when his arms fastened around her, holding her impossibly close. Her mouth was feasting on his. She couldn't pull away. She wanted to, more than anything. She felt her heart breaking more with every beat it took, but she couldn't pull away. Sucking his tongue further into her mouth, she felt a throaty sound coming from him. He tasted of coffee and red licorice, and she couldn't imagine there was anything in the world that tasted better. Nothing tasted better than Tom Quincy's kiss. One hand gripped along his shoulder blade, holding herself in his arms, while the other one took a bold grope at his buttocks. The weeks with David really had helped her loosen up! Apparently, her move had him assured she was enjoying this, and seconds later she sighed blissfully when he hauled her even further into his embrace, feeling a sensational heat pooling low in her belly and between her legs by the way his arousal poked against her.
They wouldn't have stopped hadn't it been for the cabriolet driver who had honked and whistled. Parting out of breath and with flushed faces, Tommy was startled into muteness at Jude's words.
Adjusting her clothes, and looking sadder than she wanted to, she gave him a small smile. "Thank you."
"What for," he eventually asked, keeping from being playful and returning something lame like 'my pleasure'.
"This." She put her sunglasses on and stepped away from him. "I needed this. To let go."
Letting go wasn't necessarily the first thing coming to his mind when he thought about what just had happened. "I don't understand," he openly admitted.
"You want me." She sighed and looked down to her feet, forcing herself to smile when she looked up again. "At least I finally know why we kissed. Or why you look at me in a way you shouldn't. We can't happen, Tommy. You want me because we can't happen. It's never been anything else. Unless we end up in the tabloids," she spoke, guilt paling her face visibly, "I won't say anything to Sadie. I've got to go. See you tomorrow."
He could only watch how she walked away, leaving him more lost than he had ever felt before.
###
After the mind-blowing kiss with Jude, Tommy found himself on the verge of desperation. Not only had this kiss left him with a sense of want and longing that were completely unknown to him, but also had he realized that no matter what would happen between him and Jude in the following days, he could not stay Sadie's boyfriend one more moment.
It hadn't been easy to tell her and there had been a lot of begging from her side to give her another chance, but after about ten minutes of her pleas, he had had enough and doubtlessly declared that there was nothing she could do to make him change his mind because this wasn't about her, but about him. She had been silent afterwards, and without further words or gestures left his apartment.
That was an hour ago, and now he found himself drunk in his living room, the taste of Jude's mouth still lingering on his tongue, and he wasn't sure if he even wanted it to go away. The electric shocks her touch had caused would keep him up all night, of that he was certain. "Want a beer," he asked with no sign of actual care when Kwest sat down next to him.
"No." Kwest knew about the kiss. Tommy had already confessed. "So the thing with Sadie…"
"Is done. She and I are done. Are you sure you don't want a beer? It really makes things easier!" It surely helped forgetting things, though tonight that effect had yet to kick in.
"No," Kwest repeated, rolling his eyes. "Maybe you should sober up, yourself."
"Why? My life is over."
Now Kwest wanted a beer. But not to drink! He wanted to stuff the bottle down Tommy's throat. "Oh please! Stop being so melodramatic! So what, you kissed her. It's not like it never happened before. And from what you've told me, she was anything but angry. That's a good thing."
"She thinks I only want her for sex. And that only because I'm not allowed to! Although that's not really true. I am allowed to. If she would let me! Which I'm pretty sure she would have, this afternoon." He sighed heavily. "The way her body felt in my arms… She was so warm, and she smelled so good. Have I mentioned how good that new shampoo of hers is? She's having it for a few weeks now, but I can't get enough of smelling it. It's some flower. Jasmine, I think. I used to sleep with a Jasmine. Not the flower. She didn't smell as good as Jude. Jasmine the girl, I mean."
"You are so drunk," Kwest sing-song'ed, a part of him enjoying Tom's willingness to tell, which he was now doing. "What happened again the other day? You know, when you and Jude were outside in the back…"
"She gave me a squeeze."
"That's synonym for…"
"Grabbing my balls," he snipped. "Hands on, groping hard. She made a point."
"So she said," Kwest recalled.
"Got me hard."
"Oh boy."
"Less than ten seconds to get me moving upwards, or so. That's what she said. She really did make a point." A lazy hand darted out, trying to reach the beer, but when he realized he'd never manage those last seven inches towards the can without actually moving his whole upper body, he gave up. "Can you hand me my beer?"
"No."
"You're a bad friend."
"And you're annoying when you're drunk. So she got into your head, and your libido. Does that mean you're going after her now?"
"She thinks I don't really care for her," he mumbled again, more and more whiny.
"Not what I asked." He couldn't warm up to the idea of his friend dating Jude, for he was convinced it would end badly, but on the other hand he had never seen Tommy like this before, and that had him wondering if he might not have fallen in love, after all.
"I want her. In bed. I want to sleep with her. I want her in my arms, and I want her to say my name when I'm inside her. I know I'm a bad person for wanting that, but I can't help it."
"Imagine you had her, what would you do the next day?"
"Her," Tommy grinned tiredly, "again and again. She's so pretty. No, she beautiful. And her ass… It felt it so nice in my hands," he half-slurred. "Two globes made to fit into my hands. I wonder if she's exercising? Sports, I mean. Not sex. I'd gladly offer myself for that!"
"You can't have her as your sex-kitten. She has had a tough time getting over you, and she's finally managing it. Aside the kiss that is. If you go after her, you have to be sure you want her for more than just some fun in the sheets."
"I know," he agreed, barely able to hold his eyes open any longer. It had been a long day. "She smells so good…"
"She's also smart and very easy to scare away," Kwest added but stayed quiet afterwards, seeing how Tommy had fallen asleep.
###
Darkness surrounded Tommy once again. The rain was falling in having drops from the sky. He assumed there was a sky somewhere above all that darkness. He realized he wasn't searching his way towards Jude this time, and then he found himself surprised there was a 'this time' and that this wasn't the first time he had that looked like this.
"You're not looking for me," a soft female voice came out of nowhere, soothing and yet unsettling. His eyes darted upwards, taking in the empty darkness that enfolded him. He felt lost. "Where are you?" He asked in return.
"I'm right here," she said, and just like that he found himself sitting on a bed, her next to him. She was naked, but didn't seem to mind. Golden hair fell ever so softly over her bare shoulders, and he brushed it away as gently as he could.
"Sleep with me," she whispered.
He looked at the girl again, this time able to define her as Jude, despite having known it was her all along. She pulled on his shoulders and made him fall backwards, but before he could give in to the alluring request as he had understood it, she was curled up against his side, breathing almost too softly for him to hear. He shifted, propping his head up on one arm, brushing her curls off her face and shoulder once more, watching her snore lightly.
"I love you, Jude."
Tommy's eyes shot open, and he sat upright in less than half a second. He was in his living room; he realized after a long, panic-filled moment. Eyes adjusted to the bright light, though the room was barely illuminated by the intruding moonlight. Holy fucking shit, he thought, recalling the last words of his before he had woken up. Had he ever used them before? Okay, yes – he had. Had he ever really meant them was the more important question!
It wasn't possible. It was just a dream. He had fallen for this sex-willing, purring vixen that infiltrated his dreams every night for weeks now! He was not in love with Jude. Not with the real Jude. The real Jude was probably going to hate him now, which he was more than to blame for.
How stupid had he been to kiss her. Let alone, kiss her like that. It was almost dry-sex. Without the actual body-parts, but certainly with enough passion! This had to end. He needed to get a grip on his life. The good thing was he was already single, now all he had to do was get Jude's friendship back, and while he was at it, he might as well get rid of that little punk she shockingly still hadn't shot to the moon yet! It was better for her if David left her alone. She didn't need to be distracted by that idiot.
He was cheating on her, 'real' boyfriend or not! Yeah. That was the plan. Jude had to become single, too. No, wait – damn! Jude had to stay his friend! That was the plan. He needed water and a shower, and some more sleep. Yet, given his last dream, maybe a few Espressos were better. It was probably a smart idea to stay awake for a while. At least, until he trusted his dreams again! Hell, if he didn't watch out he'd end up proposing to dream-Jude. And that was the last thing his poor mind needed! He was confused enough as it was.
Chapter ten
Tommy sat in his chair in the studio, one foot propped up on his knee, his position comfortably, slouched into the chair, a newspaper in his hands, held up in front of his face as he read it. Or, as he pretended to. Two nosy eyes peeked over the upper end of the paper, small and intrigued. Damn, he mentally cursed, he should have taken a position in the lobby, instead of inside the studio. Sure, this place was more reasonable for him to be found, but idiotically it had walls, and also a door that automatically fell shut. How was he supposed to hear what Jude and David were talking about outside the studio, when he couldn't listen? In retrospect, he should have given lip-reading a try when he had the chance. There used to be a girl he knew – Sharon, or Sarah, or so – and she had told him she was a very good lip-reader. His reply back then had been a smug comment about teaching her some other things to be good in, where she could use her own lips instead. He should have taken a lesson from her instead! He wondered what she was doing these days, and if he could hire her…
"If you keep reading this thing," Kwest uttered up from behind him, being busy doing his actual job of mixing, "I'm starting to believe you've gone crazy. Have you ever read a newspaper before?"
The brief moment of feeling insulted left Tommy's mind rather quickly. Instead, he threw a grim look over his shoulder. "I do read newspapers. Despite the fact that the news channel has one fine weather girl." His gaze returned to Jude and David who still chatted in the lobby. "You think he has seen my new car?"
"Who?" Kwest asked with little to non-existent interest.
"David. You think he has seen the new Aston?" When Tommy had stopped by the car dealer and asked for a unique car, William, his handler, had delightedly informed him that the Aston Martin DB9 from the new James Bond movie had recently entered the market and was extremely wanted. "I'm not the sure if I keep the car though. I'm only testing it out. Maybe I decide for something bigger. More…unique."
"Would it help you to know what David considers a unique car?"
Tommy's head once more turned to Kwest, and the latter was baffled to see interest, instead of the expected annoyance and anger. "You wouldn't know what that is, would you?"
Kwest merely rolled his eyes. "I can't believe you're spending a fortune to outdo some teenager who never even worked for his money. That guy has as much money as you do. Don't you think it's ridiculous to buy a car he could easily afford himself, only to make Jude notice?"
"Jude," he professed in sincerity, "has nothing to do with that!"
"If it's not Jude, then you must be trying to impress a teenage boy. That, added to the fact that you used to be a part of a boy-band, worries me!"
Jokes about him being gay weren't new. It was something that came with the whole 'boy-band' thing. Not that he had anything against gays — but personally he preferred lady parts. "Would you ask him?"
"Whom?"
"David," Tommy added, wanting to add a 'Duh!'. Wasn't it obvious? Who else were they talking about! "Ask him what car he wants, but can't get his hands on."
"Why?"
"Think, Kwest! So I can buy it for myself."
"Which you would clearly succeed in," the engineer mocked, "because you're such an influential person! I forgot that you regularly dine with the mighty leaders of our world!"
"I do have people who'd do a lot for me," He declared, sternly. There were a lot of people who still believed him to be one of the greatest men to ever walk the earth. Fame lasted long, especially if fans were female. "I know this Italian girl who's a descendant to Enzo Ferrari. If I wanted to drive the Enzo, I could." Pride laced the snippy remark thickly.
"Yeah. And I'm sure the guy who already owns two Ferraris dreams of nothing else than having a third one."
Tommy chuckled, partially to drown out his annoyance, not allowing Kwest to rile him up that day. "You're in a bad mood."
"I'm just fine," Kwest assured a little too firmly. "Don't worry about me."
"I wasn't." He quickly folded the newspaper. "Here she comes!"
"Who-ho!" Kwest sarcastically exclaimed.
Ignoring the sarcasm, Tommy sat up more straightly. When the door opened, he smiled most charmingly. "Good morning, girl. You look beautiful today."
Jude, whose hand was in David's, stopped abruptly in irritation, making David stumble into her. She didn't care. "What's wrong with you?"
"Nothing," he protested, still smiling. "I'm just being nice."
"Okay. If you're afraid I'm mad at you because of the kiss, relax! I'm not. It was a kiss and nothing more. It has happened before, and it was nothing earth-shattering."
Kwest started snickering, and Tommy's light and happy eyes flashed with something he refused to call 'hurt'. It was just the stab into his ego that had him losing his good mood, Tommy told himself. Nothing better than a good flaming arrow to scratch his confidence, and that in the early morning! "So you told David about the kiss?" Tommy looked towards the guy whose arms were inappropriately close around Jude's waist. He had always hated PDA. "Sorry man." Not that he meant it.
"I'm sure you are," David agreed, also not meaning one word. "But don't worry. My girl is still with me, so the kiss can't have been very good. Probably just a small smooch – your girlfriend wouldn't let you score so you used mine to get some action. I don't hold grudges against desperate men."
Kwest's snickering turned into full-fledged laughter. Jude's grin widened too. She left David to bicker with Tommy and settled in the booth. If they continued like this, she'd end up having to choose sides and that would not end well, no matter whom she'd pick.
Tommy meanwhile stood up, trying to show that he was the big man in these walls. "I'm not desperate. And my ex-girlfriend would have loved to let me into her bed! I don't know what Jude told you to keep you from getting angry, but it wasn't just a small smooch. It was a lot of tongue and hands and groping and passion…"
"And yet she came back to me," David finished for Tommy with a smug expression. "The guy she's been obsessing over for more than a year finally wanted to have her, even if just for one kiss or whatever it was, and where did she spend the night? With me! That must really annoy you." A prospect David liked.
"Not the least bit," Tommy stated, acrimony rising fast. His eyes grew small as he stepped closer towards the 'little punk', trying to intimidate him. "She's been with you for what – over a month? Shouldn't you worry that she's looking for action elsewhere? Obviously you're not satisfying her. Jude is someone who needs a passionate guy – someone who knows how to take care of her, if you catch my drift. You're just a little boy who keeps spending daddy's money and if I wanted to have Jude, she'd be kissing my feet right now!"
"Actually, I'm an inch taller than you." David sat down in the couch in the back. "And whether I earned the money or not, I'm richer than you. Jude told me about your penthouse in the little tower. Must suck having to waste your time looking up to me… And now," he advised full of arrogance, "you should probably resume work. I wouldn't want you to end up getting fired because you tried to put a little rich boy into place!" To make sure he had the last word, David took out his iPod and placed the plugs into his ears, shutting him out.
Tommy, whose gritting teeth Kwest could hear despite wearing headphones, sat down in his chair, put on his own headphones and wished for this day to be over already. He had a fucking car to return, and maybe get his legs lengthened.
###
Lips retreated reluctantly from the soft cheek in front of him. David's face was hidden in the dim light of his car, but Jude could tell he was smiling. He leaned back, and took her hand. "I need to ask you something and if you don't like it, just be honest. Go out with me?"
"Tomorrow? We just went to a movie…" She liked spending time with him, but every night?
"A real date."
"Oh. Oh…" Jude wasn't sure how she should react to that. The thought of actually dating him had never occurred to her. When that thing between them had started, she had still been hung up on Tommy, and now? Things were different, sure, but did she really want to risk what good, lighthearted relationship they had for a possible heartbreak?
"Obviously," David quickly back-paddled, "You're not a fan of that idea. It's okay. I just thought you and I get along well, and that maybe it'd be worth a try…"
"What about Amanda?" Jude stalled.
"Spoke with her this morning. Over."
Jude bit her lower lip, considering his words. Maybe she should just jump into the cold water and see how things would work out… "One date can't hurt, can it?"
David's hopeful expression broke into a smiling face. "No, it can't."
"Tomorrow night, then?"
"Eight? I'll pick you up."
"Okay."
###
Jude sat in the studio the next day, checking the time for the umpteenth time and it still wasn't nearing the evening. Two more hours and then she could finally go home and change, because in three, David would come and pick her up. After having spent the last night thinking about him and wondering if maybe she felt more for him than just friendship, she found she couldn't completely deny the question. And now, she looked forward to let him spark something in her.
Kwest, who sat next to her, also checked the time again. "It's five am. Tommy was supposed to show up an hour ago. Where is he?"
"No idea," Jude told in mild interest. "You think I can go early?"
"No. D wants the last touches done on 'Are you happy now'. If T's not showing up, I'll have to work overtime and I refuse to let you have fun when I can't," he cracked.
Jude turned around, facing him with a grin. "Playing boss now, huh?"
"Gotta use the opportunity! Up, get in the booth," he commanded with a smirk.
Jude laughed at the unfamiliar request coming from him, but nonetheless did as told. A second later she slapped Kwest's shoulder, startling him. "Look! Look!" She pointed towards the lobby, on the verge of a shock. "He's wearing girl shoes!"
Kwest, confused, looked towards the lobby and started laughing. Tom Quincy was standing there, wearing his usual attire of shirt, jeans and leather jacket, but this time the outfit was completed by hideous cowboy boots that had at least two-inch heels, if not more for his long jeans were covering most of it.
"He's gone nuts," Jude dryly remarked.
"Completely," Kwest agreed. "Wonder what car he came with. He got rid of James Bond's car again after realizing it wasn't as special as he thought. I'm a little afraid he came by a helicopter!"
"Why is he so eager to show off?" Jude wondered with a frown. "It's not as if anyone here doesn't know he's rich!"
Kwest wondered if he should tell Jude about Tommy's discussion with David and how David had remarked about being taller than Tommy. Kwest was pretty sure that was the reason Tommy was wearing those ridiculous shoes. Though, and he was just as sure about that, when being asked, Tommy would surely blame those shoes on some hot saleswoman who had made him buy these because the were the latest trend. He decided to let Jude find out on her own why Tommy was behaving like a rutting moose. "No idea…"
Jude sat back down in her chair, more accurately Tommy's chair, recording now forgotten. Tommy entered, looking as cocky and confident as ever. As if he had no idea the whole lobby was staring at him, or that Jude was two seconds away from bursting in laughter. "Nice shoes," she giggled.
"Thanks. Gucci. Newest in the stores."
"Go figure," she muttered, biting her tongue from telling him they would look good to Sadie's new blue skirt. "A little high on the heels…"
"I was told that's the new chic." Tommy stayed cool and said it with more sincerity than Jude had believed was possible. Two seconds later she was cracking up, curling in the chair she sat in.
"What's so funny?" he wondered, setting his forehead into wrinkles.
"Nothing," Jude lied, trying her hardest to compose herself. "Listen, can we start recording? David asked me out for a real date, and I'd like to leave in time."
"A what?" Tommy asked, suddenly considering letting Jude work overtime. Hadn't Darius mentioned something about an urgent thing, something that made it necessary to finish her song tonight? Maybe they could finish the whole album while they were at it!
Jude rolled her eyes with a heavy sigh. "Save it. I don't want to hear your opinion. David asked me out. He wants to turn our thing into something serious, and I agreed."
"Interesting. But, guess what? My opinion comes from free and I hardly care whether or not you want to hear it. It's senseless trying to date him for real. You're not going to fall for him if you haven't done so already. Either there are sparks or there aren't. If you haven't fallen for him by now, you never will."
"Given the fact that there's this immense sexual attraction between us, I think we're just fine."
"Date me."
The room fell into silence.
Jude wasn't sure if she really was awake. She could have sworn she had just heard him asking her out. Looking over her shoulder, she asked Kwest, "Did he just really ask me that?"
Kwest seemed equally shocked, eyes glued suspiciously on Tommy. "I think so."
Jude looked back to Tommy, seeing him smiling winningly, as if asking her out was the most normal thing in the world, with no doubt of her agreeing to it. "I said," he grinned, "Go out with me. A real date. You and me." He set on his best smile, polished and sparkling, showing off white teeth as if to blind her by his attractiveness. That trick had stopped working – had it ever worked?
Jude groaned, seeing he wanted an answer. "How desperate are you?" she asked rhetorically. "What did David do to you that you're so eager to keep me from dating him?"
"That wasn't why I asked," Tommy pointed out, not so happy about the way this had turned out, let alone that he sounded so churlish in his reply. He was surprised that she wasn't the least bit happy about his offer. Hadn't she always wanted that? Date him? Sure, he had made the offer under less than ideal circumstances, but now that he thought about it, the idea of spending a romantic evening with Jude did sound tempting, especially if they repeated what kiss they had shared a few days ago!
"You can't be serious," she angrily shot. "Just because you're a bored single now, doesn't mean you can ask me out! Let's ignore the fact that I doubt the sincerity of your offer, or the minor obstacle of you being my sister's recent ex. Let's even ignore the fact that you broke my heart twice already! But, to argue in your way, it's not at all making sense to ask me out! You won't fall for me now, if you haven't fallen for me in the very beginning. I think it is more than clear that you did not fall for me in the very beginning, and that means you won't fall for me now. Ergo a date between you and me is stupid and a waste of time! Now, can we please start recording? I'm not going to call off my night with David just because you don't like him!" She ended her rant, taking a deep breath to fill her empty lungs with air again. Then she remembered something. "Did you really tell him you'd get me to kiss your feet?"
He was half a second away from reposting when her words hit him. His mouth closed, and his face – Jude was sure – paled a notch.
"Guess that's the reason you asked me out, then. Good to know you're not playing with my heart again!" Jude marched off into the booth, and Tommy fell down into his chair, mute and annoyed. "Don't say a word," he warned Kwest who's lips itched to mock him. Kicking off the hideous and uncomfortable shoes he was wearing, he hit the intercom button. The poor button had to suffer under Tommy's temper a lot lately. "Start on three."
"Seriously," Kwest chuckled, not afraid of Tommy's glare. "Nice shoes!"
Tommy growled and covered his face with his hands, admitting defeat. "Made me an inch and a half taller. Kwest, I'm going crazy!"
"Did you mean it when you asked her out?" he wondered. More. he needed to know. If this was all about showing David off, Kwest would seriously reconsider his friendship with Tommy. Jude's heart was too fragile to be used as a match-ball.
"Not when I asked. Or, maybe. I just… Come to think of it, I'd love to spend the evening with her. She's my girl. I don't even know how else to describe it. She's funny, beautiful, and-"
"At least two years too young," Kwest firmly reminded Tommy, realizing where this was going.
"She's legal."
###
"He said she's legal! That's his way of admitting he's done caring about the consequences should he go after her. What if he really goes after her? Portia," Kwest sighed, "you know how he gets when someone challenges him. He can't say 'no'. Remember the time Chaz told him blowfish would kill him, if prepared wrong? The sleezy grin he had on while telling made Tom eat two fish! Two very dangerous, very life-threatening fish! This isn't about food; it's about a girl he's been fantasizing about for over a year! I'm afraid Jude's getting hurt along the way!"
"What makes you think she'll allow him to hurt her?" Portia made sure Jude was nowhere in sight when she leaned towards Kwest. "She's falling for David. She's all over him every time I see them!"
"That's the worst part," Kwest proclaimed, looking worried. "He's on the verge of really losing her. What if he's going after only to prevent losing her, instead of wanting to be with her? It's Jude. She will give in eventually," he reminded Portia with a look of defeat. "She always does…" Even though she had played hard until now.
Jude couldn't believe what she was hearing. Even Kwest, who had proven to be a real friend the last weeks, was doubting – even now – that she was strong enough to resist Tommy's smile. Anger rose in her and she heatedly spun around, disappearing behind a rack of clothes, eager to hear the rest of their talk. Sadly it ended there and Kwest and Portia left for lunch.
Lunch… Right, she was on her way to ask Kwest if she could leave earlier. Last night had been great, having spent the evening with David in a fancy club, dancing closely, even a little more than that, and then he had been the perfect gentleman and after a fairly long make out session in his car, he had safely delivered her home. That day they were supposed to meet for lunch and since she couldn't find Tommy, she could only tell Kwest that she wanted to leave.
And now he was gone, too. Great!
Jude's focus shifted from Kwest, who was walking out of the front door with Portia, towards the rack of clothes she was hiding after. Were those Bikinis? Wasn't she the only female artist currently recording at G-Major? Why were there Bikinis?
"You'd look stunning in them," someone said so out of nowhere. Jude shrieked and jumped in surprise.
"Damn, Quincy! Where the hell did you come from and why are you lurking around racks of clothes?"
"I could ask you the same," he countered, returning her flushed but angry expression with a charismatic smirk. "I brought you lunch, since I figured you'd be hungry. Pizza with double cheese and pepperonis."
"Thanks." Her nose involuntarily noticed the smell of olive oil, tomato sauce, and cheese. She bet he had waited in line at that Pizza place for at least fifteen minutes! Good-looking and smelling of food was a dangerous concoction, but Jude willed herself to ignore that. "I'm having a date, and he is waiting for me. Now that you're here I can officially tell you that I'm out for lunch. Bye!" She straightened up, pushed the rack away from her and walked away. His scent proved to be difficult to get over, and she needed space between them, afraid she might take a bite at his earlobe. That'd be more than humiliating! Yummy and maybe even a little kinky, but totally embarrassing.
Halfway down the stairs Tommy caught her side. "Wait, where are you going?" He looked…hurt. Disappointed. Damn, she thought, he was one fine actor! As if she'd believed him!
"David. He's waiting for me." She reminded him.
"Oh right." Tommy took two steps at once and blocked Jude's way.
Startled, she frowned. "What now?"
"Don't go," he pleaded, leaning closer, smiling flirtatiously. "Eat here, with me."
Jude's eyes softened; her lips parted for a sweet beam. Her head leaned closer to him, and she saw his smile widening. He probably believed he was winning. Placing one of her hands gently on his shoulder, she neared his ear with her mouth, fighting the urge to lick and taste, whispering, "I can't. Someone more important is waiting for me." Leaning back, smugly smirking, she patted his cheek, belittling. "Have fun with your pizza."
She walked past him, proud at her victorious moment when she was tugged towards Tommy's office, his hand having a firm but strangely soft hold on her arm. "Quincy," she protested, knowing it was useless.
"Stop it," he told her harshly, outraged even. "The whole number about David?" He nudged her into his office, and closed the door with a slam. "You're doing this to annoy me, and here I am, admitting it does. That means you can stop doing it now!"
Jude pulled out of his hold and gaped at him. With arms crossed in front of her while she took a defying pose. "I what?"
"Dating David," Tommy said self-complacently. "Please! He's not nearly man enough for you!"
She started laughing, sneering when she said, "Oh, and you think you are? See, from what he told me yesterday he pretty much put you into place the other day. That tells me he is more man than you are. Let's say I do take your advice and go for someone who is more man. Whom should I go for, since you're not qualified enough…" She tapped a finger against her chin, pondering, before delivering her blow. "You think Chaz is available?"
He scoffed dramatically, trying his hardest not to get infuriated. "Funny. I almost laughed. You want to play dirty? That's fine with me. Go ahead and call Chaz, I'm sure he'll love the opportunity to show you how much man he really is. Be prepared for disappointment. David," he said sternly, getting close to her once more, "is not for one second what you need. He never will be!"
"Why not," Jude asked straight out, not backing away. Instead, she shot another arrow. "He's good-looking, nice, and attentive. He's funny, and sweet, and his lips are mind-blowing!"
"My lips are better," Tommy haughtily professed. He stepped away when her dark eyes had his body reacting in a very inconvenient way. She was getting to him in ways he didn't know how to handle, and in lack of any better ideas, he bragged. "I look better, I smell better, and I don't even have to be attentive to see that you love it when I'm not being nice!"
Fists balled at Jude's sides. "Can you spell 'conceited'?" She huffed heavily and stepped towards Tommy, eyes hard and dark. "You are the most arrogant, audacious, and annoying person I've met in my entire life! You had your chance with me, and you blew it! Now I'm with David, and he's more than satisfying!"
"No," Tommy corrected, taking his own step towards her. Thoughts of hiding his forming arousal were as far from his mind as letting her have the last word. She tried to back away, but the door was blocking her exit. His hands went flat against the door on both sides of her head, and his face came impossibly close. "I never had my chance with you."
She could smell his sugary breath and wanted to quip about it. She could see the sparkling blue in his intense eyes and wanted to compliment about it. She could take in his warmth and his masculine scent and wanted to pull him closer. She felt a familiar heat between her legs, and wondered how high it'd rise once they took things to another level. She was aware of his ragged respiration. A piece of her wanted to thrust her hips forward, yearning to find out if he was hard. She felt aroused, why shouldn't he? Was it weird to feel…eager…while fighting? Not that she'd ever allow him to have her, should he be 'eager' too! No! Pff! As if! She was mad at him after all! "And you want to change that now?" she asked in disbelief, hating herself for the quiver in her voice and the weakness in her knees.
"What if I say yes," he whispered, coming yet another increment closer. The heat in his breath set her skin on fire. He was close enough to kiss her, should he want to. Jude wondered if he planned to.
In that moment she remembered Kwest's words. "She will give in eventually. She always does…" Thanks to him she found the strength to end this. Ducking and slipping out beneath his arms, she made sure there were at least a few feet between them. "That's too sad," she bitterly countered. "It'll be a waste of your time and your material. I know David struck a nerve. You want to prove to him you're more of a man than he is. What better way than to charm your way into my sheets…"
"That's not it," he barked, anger still flaring inside him. "What does it take for you to believe me?"
"Tell me that you have truly, completely, and honestly fallen deeply in love with me." Jude had not planned on saying that, but now that it was out, why beat around the bush? "That's what it'll take for you to make me believe you. Until then, you've only got a slim chance to gain back my friendship. You want more? Show me that you really need me, that it hurts not to have me, and most important – I need to know that I can break your heart, before I'll even consider allowing you to break my heart again!"
He stayed silent. Sparks? Yes. Did he like her more than he should, more than he had liked someone in a damn long time? Yes. Love? That is one big word!
"That's what I thought," Jude said, allowing her self a brief moment of sadness. Just a moment, and then she'd be the tough girl again with no one being able to scratch her heart.
"You aren't in love with David," Tommy told her, unwilling to let this talk end.
"Neither are you in love with me. Yet, you asked me out."
"I will ask you out again, Jude. I will ask you out until you say 'yes'." Okay, it surprised him just how vehement he was, but well…it was Jude. "I can't tell you what you want to hear. But, I can tell you that I want you. I can tell you that you're in my thoughts, in my dreams, and under my skin. And I know you feel the same. Don't lie to me and tell me you don't feel the sparks when I touch you. Don't lie to me and tell me my kisses mean nothing more to you than his do. I felt the difference in your lips, Jude. There's passion between you and me, and whether you like it or not, you and David will never have that!"
Jude offered a mere nod, acknowledging his words. "Hm…let's see: With him I have trust, fun, hot kisses and more, and with you I have passion. Even without the fun or the hot kisses, I'll still choose him. Trust, Tommy. I can't say I trust you."
He sighed, slouching his shoulders defeated. "Will you ever get over me and your sister?"
"It's not even it." She walked towards the door, opening it. On her way out, she looked at him once more. "How will I know I'm more to you than a notch in your bedpost? A win over another guy…"
"I can't tell you that I'm in love with you." He pleaded for her understanding.
"Why not?" she asked bluntly, just for the briefest second baring her soul to him, letting him see there was still the young and naive girl in her that dreamed of nothing more but his love, no matter how good she had become in being wiser and hiding those foolish parts of her.
"Because…" he trailed off, not even knowing why he was so incapable to answer.
Jude closed her eyes and collected her strength. Then she looked at him coldly. "Because," she answered for him, "you don't feel it! Stop asking me out!"
"No!" He refused firmly.
"I'll never say yes," she declared and walked out.
Not even a second later he was once more blocking her way. "Fine," Tommy proclaimed, his face stern, "You think you're just a challenge? Okay. Let's say you are. I have never lost one. Don't you, not even for one second, believe I will lose this one! I will have you in my arms, Jude. And you will come on your own! You will beg me to take you, but even more, you will beg me to take you again and again!"
"Never," she fired fiercely, raging over his arrogance.
"Wait and see."
"Is that a bet," Jude asked, baiting. If he really believed she gave in, he'd be in for a surprise.
"What if it is," he dared her.
Jude smiled. "You have until my birthday to do the impossible and make me beg for you. If you fail, I'll get your new car. The shiny red Ferrari."
Arrogance overcame him. "Deal. And if I win, you'll shoot David to the moon and we'll have sex, because I know you will beg for it!" They shook hands, and Jude grinned as victoriously as Tommy did. She wanted this over, once and for all. And what better way to be clear than taking a fortune away from him!