Chapter 13: Prick
Three days. Three days had passed since he'd woken up in Mondstadt. Or rather, two and a half, because it was currently late in the night.
"Subaru, what's going on?" Amber asked as she landed next to him with her wind glider, now standing with him at the street overseeing the market square directly. "Your mind's not in it today. Your progress is slower this time."
"Ah, it's nothing. I guess I'm just tired from Rosaria's spars."
"Hmph! Of course, you are! After all that fighting, it's actually surprising that you're able to make it for flight training."
"Paimon thinks that too! Stinky Space, you should really take some time to yourself! Like, take a bath!"
"Yeah, I guess…"
He did not want to tell it to Amber or Paimon, but the reason why he was so out of it on that night was because of what would happen the next day.
'Stormterror's arrival. Have I practised enough?'
In just two days, Subaru had managed to be proficient enough with the wind glider to land properly but is now training in midair navigation. As for his weapon, his repeated practice of the basics had more or less ingrained those movements in his muscles. He's nowhere near proficient; he's only been training for two days. However, for his limited training, he hoped it would be enough to take Stormterror down.
'Oh, who am I kidding?! How the hell am I gonna get the skills to beat a fucking God-blessed dragon in two days?!'
He had certainly not been slacking off; he'd even taken away his hours from Noelle's discussions in the morning all so that he could repeat his polearm strikes by the cemetery. He'd been working his muscles so hard that he could drop, but his sleepless nights were enough to calm them down. He had enough time to relax them by keeping them in slight motion and lightly massaging them. Most would say that his daily schedule was not only awful, but self-damaging, but he'd just shrug them off. He had more pressing matters to worry about than his health. It also helped that despite all the pain, none of it held a candle to the agony of death. Keeping that in mind, Subaru kept pressing ahead, carving into his heart right now so that he can pay his pound of flesh without gravely hurting himself.
"Well, despite how you're doing today, you're getting a lot better!" Amber said to him, breaking him out of his thoughts. "You're really working hard, huh? I can really see that."
Despite everything that was going to happen, Subaru couldn't help but beam at that comment.
"Thanks, Amber! You have no idea how much that meant!"
"Aww, don't mention it! I mean, it's your own fault that I'm telling you stuff like that, right?"
"No, not really. I couldn't have done this without any of you. Or Rosaria-san, Noelle-san, Kaeya-san… I really owe a debt to Mondstadt in general."
"Ehehe, don't worry, we're happy to serve! Oh, and you met Noelle? I didn't know that?"
"Yeah, Paimon didn't hear about that either? Who's Noelle?"
Just as Subaru was about to respond, he noticed something weird in the distance.
From his spot in the street up above, he noticed someone rummaging around in the middle of the night near the fountain. Looking closer, he noticed the man actually stepping into the fountain and reaching in to pick out something from within.
"Um, what's going on there?"
Following his gaze, Amber saw the person rummaging in the fountain as well.
"I don't know," she confessed. "Let's find out."
Wordlessly nodding, Subaru jumped off the ledge of the road along with Amber, deploying their wind gliders as they did so. Paimon simply floated down with them.
"Hey! You!" Amber called out. "What are you doing there?!"
"Ah!"
The man recoiled in fear upon noticing the two people approaching him. In his haste, he tried to jump out of the fountain, only to let his foot snag on the ledge. Just as he was about to fall, however, Subaru pulled out his whip and caught him by his torso, mentally apologizing for any pain he might have felt from it. Since Subaru was still gliding, the man still fell and made Subaru sink a little lower, but the truncation of his fall made it safer.
"Good going, Subaru," Amber said as she landed after him. "Now, just who are you?"
Walking up to him, Subaru noticed that the man was one that he'd never seen before.
"Anthony?" Amber called him as Subaru unwrapped his whip from his body. "What are you doing here? It's been a while since I'd seen you."
"A-Amber, I'm sorry, I just didn't know what else to do!" the now-named Anthony suddenly barked out, standing up and pressing his palms together in pleading.
"Relax, Anthony," Amber replied, walking to him while raising her hands in surrender. "I'm sorry we startled you, but what were you doing there in the first place? And this late at night?"
"I-I… well, I thought that no one else would be here, so… I-I wanted to try and get some coins!"
"Coins?" Subaru echoed, looking back at the fountain in the square. "Is this a wishing fountain or something?"
"Yeah, it is," Anthony answered. "People would come to the fountain and make wishes all the time. And.. you are…?"
"Oh, I'm Subaru. Natsuki Subaru, but Subaru's my first name, so you can call me that."
"Ah, um, okay. I'm Anthony Rinks. What brings you to Mondstadt?"
"Anthony," Amber chided him. "Stop trying to change the topic. Can you please tell us why you were… oh, you needed money for her, right?"
"Y-Yeah," Anthony replied, paling as he hung his head low. "Anna's not getting any better. She's… She's all that I have, I can't lose her! But my job is hardly giving me enough for the treatment; I need to get another source!"
"It really is cruel, what those Fatui are doing," Amber reminisced. "Ah, Subaru, Paimon, let me explain for you both."
"Paimon?" Anthony asked. "Who's that?"
"Hey! Paimon's Paimon! Paimon's right here!"
"A-AH! She's flying!"
"O-Oi! You're acting just like Stinky Space when he found me!"
As soon as Amber and Subaru calmed the confused boy down, letting him get used to the presence of Paimon, Anthony himself decided to reveal his story.
"My sister, Anna, she's ill," he revealed. "And her sickness… she has the Abyssal Infection."
Subaru had heard about that illness before. He'd heard about it from Noelle just the previous day. The unpredictable illness that one would get from interacting with Abyssal Crystals, or rather, the infected ones. Subaru thought of it like getting rabies from dog bites, but due to the Fatui hiking the costs, that analogy would be complete if a single rabies shot cost 10 million yen. Basically, Abyssal Infection was the worst thing that someone could get in that day and age, almost like getting afflicted with cancer or AIDS.
"She's getting worse," Anthony continued. "She was still bedridden last week, but recently she'd started getting seizures. Just today… t-today… I f-found a tissue in our bathroom… with b-blood on it. I-I'm so sorry, it's just… I'm desperate. I need to get enough funds to cure her illness. I-I can't let her die!"
Amber and Subaru stayed quiet for a while, but then, Amber stepped up to the boy and wrapped him up in a hug. "I am so sorry to hear that, Anthony," she said, still embracing him even though he wasn't returning it. "Tomorrow, I will see what I can do to get help. I'll talk to the knights and see what we can do to help. Anna will not need to die; I promise you that."
As Anthony slowly wrapped his arms around her too and started to bawl on her shoulder, Subaru couldn't help but feel his heart resonate with him too. He wanted to join the hug as well, but he knew better. He knew that he would help in another way, by ensuring that Stormterror was taken care of before it could do anything against what was left of his family. Subaru hated himself for entertaining such a selfish train of thought, but he had to worry about his own issues. In his self-hatred, he ended up looking away from the two in shame.
"How disgusting am I…?" he whispered to himself. Gladly, Paimon hadn't heard him since she decided to go up to the two and join in the hug as well.
In a few moments, Anthony had gotten completely tuckered out of his tears and got off the duo holding him. Wiping the remnants of his tears from his face, he gratefully nodded to the two.
"T-Thank you, thank you so much," he muttered.
"Don't thank us yet, Anthony," Amber replied. "Tell it to us when Anna gets better."
Anthony just nodded with an even brighter smile.
As the man left the trio, Subaru approached the other two.
"Hey, um, sorry I didn't join the hug," he confessed. "I just felt like it would be out of place, you know?"
"I-It's okay, Subaru," Amber replied, discretely wiping away her own tears. "At least you were there to help him. Just being there for someone in need is enough. Think of this as knight training; you really should get better at it, you know! Be ready to give another person a hug whenever they might need one!"
"Hm, yeah, I get it," Subaru half-heartedly replied. The Natsuki family's tradition was to step into a person's heart with their shoes on; Subaru couldn't help but feel like his own self-hatred and his own issues were making him betray the Natsuki name. And that only made him feel even worse.
"Well, Paimon thought it was fun! Hugging two giants, Paimon felt like a little doll between you two."
"We're not giants, you fairy loli. You're the one who's a fairy loli."
"Hey! Don't size-shame!"
"You have no idea what that actually means, don't you?"
"Hey, Subaru, can we talk?" Amber ended up asking, her sombre tone harshly cutting in between Subaru and Paimon's upbeat conversation. "It's about that illness, it just reminded me of something else."
"Um, okay," Subaru replied. "Paimon, you mind heading back to our room alone?"
"Nope! Paimon was alone for most of the day, after all!"
"Eugh, that sounds so accusatory. Don't worry, Paimon, I'll give you hundreds of headpats when I come back!"
"Hey! Who wants headpats from someone as stinky as you, Stinky Space?!"
Laughing her off, Subaru and Amber still said goodbye to Paimon, who sparked away from the two. And that left both of them completely alone.
"Subaru, there's something you need to know about the Abyssal Infection," Amber confessed. "You might not remember this, due to your amnesia, but I'd thought that you had the infection as well. That was until Barbara disproved it."
"Wait, I have Abyssal Infection?" Subaru asked. "Why do you say that?"
"Subaru, can you roll up your sleeves for a moment?"
"Roll up my sleeves?" Subaru echoed, confused by Amber's request. However, seeing her eyes egging him on, Subaru relented.
Rolling up his sleeves, Subaru felt a chill as his bare forearms were exposed to the wind.
"I'm talking about this," Amber said, pointing to his right arm. "I thought that that was Abyssal Infection."
Looking down at the had in question, Subaru noticed what she was pointing to.
It was the tattoo he found himself with. That long, veiny black tattoo that he had on his right arm; the one he found on his very first day in Teyvat.
"This?" Subaru asked. "This is Abyssal Infection?"
"Yep," Amber replied. "Normally, that infection would spread throughout your body, but I guess the fact that we spent three days together and I haven't noticed any change on it means that Barbara was correct about it."
Subaru remembered Barbara's comment on the same tattoo. He remembered that she said that it was not what Amber thought it was, albeit it didn't respect anything they had already known. All in all, that tattoo on his arm was a complete and utter outlier to their field of knowledge.
However, Subaru was more interested in another piece of information.
"Wait, these vein-like marks are seen in Abyssal Infection patients?"
"Yeah, they are. That's why I was so scared when I first saw that. And I guess… meeting Anthony just reminded me of that one again."
Subaru stayed silent at Amber's comment. "Amber… did this infection do something to you as well…?"
"… My dad," she confessed. "He was infected soon after I was born. I don't really remember him, but my grandfather always spoke of him pretty well. That is until my grandfather disappeared too."
"I'm… sorry to hear that."
"No, it's okay, don't be. It's just… I can't help but wonder, you know? How would things have been different if that infection had never emerged? If the two cataclysms never occurred?"
The two cataclysms. Subaru had briefly heard about that from Noelle but had never bothered to learn more about it. He was more pressed with learning about Stormterror, after all. However, since Amber was so affected by this, he had to learn just to be able to help her. After all, unlike with Anthony, no one else was here to help her other than himself.
"Amber, can you tell me about the dual cataclysm?" Subaru asked.
"The dual cataclysm? I thought you were studying it?"
"I ended up asking Noelle-san to teach me other stuff. Sorry, but I really don't know enough about it."
"That's okay. The dual cataclysm… both were terrible moments. In the first one, a distant land was destroyed by Celestia completely. No one knows the details, but this land was not only destroyed but its name was laid to waste as well. No one remembers it anymore. And… that's all we know about the first one.
"The second one, however, we know more about. Mainly because instead of being a cataclysm across a strange land, this one spanned the entirety of Teyvat. The whole world was influenced by this calamity.
"A dark shadow descended over Teyvat just as it was recovering from the first cataclysm. A shadow black and thick enough to lay waste to entire towns just by its presence. From this shadow emerged purple crystals that would attack anything it saw. Abyssal Crystals, they were, and they all carried the Infection that we are all familiar with today.
"I don't even want to imagine how many people had died from that incident. How many of those could have grown up, how they could have changed the world… the second cataclysm was the disgusting one. No matter what you say. Its effects were so vast, they're even seen today, 500 years after it occurred."
"500 years?" Subaru asked, shocked. "It's been that long since then?"
"Yes, it's been 500 years. And we're still finding caves filled with infected crystals, and we're still getting Abyssal Infection patients."
"That's… that's horrible," Subaru muttered. There wasn't anything else he could have said about it. Subaru knew what death felt like, and to imagine that the entire world had to go through that 500 years before… the second cataclysm was almost like the Chernobyl Disaster. A devastating calamity, whose effects are seen even years after it took place.
"I'm really sorry to hear that, Amber," Subaru spoke, gently tracing the veins on his arm. "I had no idea that this meant so much to you."
"It's okay, Subaru. At least, now you know that you shouldn't let people see those marks all so frequently."
The day had come.
It was the day that Stormterror would arrive. Subaru couldn't help but be on his toes for the entire day. He knew that the monster was going to arrive that day, and he kept asking himself if he was ready for it.
The answer was a simple one. He wasn't. Not in the slightest. If Subaru went against Stormterror at that moment, he would die before he could even say 'die'. And he would then be forced to do it all over again.
Subaru, however, hated death with a passion. His deaths were the reason why he could not even look at the mirror without reminding himself of every fatal injury he'd ever received.
Subaru felt his mouth go dry just by thinking about it. Even with Return by Death, Subaru could safely say that his greatest fear was still Death. Dying to Stormterror was the last thing he wanted, even if he could redo those moments.
However, he knew he had to be Brave. Brave as a Knight. He had to keep pushing himself, braving himself through the pain, and finally emerge victorious. And yet… he couldn't help but jitter at the thought of torturing himself in such a way.
"Subaru?" a voice called out. "I've been meaning to ask since you stepped into the library. Are you feeling alright?"
Looking up from being snapped out of his stupor, Subaru noticed Noelle staring at him, concern etched in her olive eyes.
"Y-Yeah, I'm fine," Subaru replied.
"…" Noelle kept her gaze trained on him, not relenting from her position.
"… What is it?"
"Subaru, please get some rest if you need it. I can clearly see those dark circles under your eyes, as well as how pale you are. Something is troubling you, isn't it? Please, I can help you."
"I – Y-You don't need to worry about that!" Subaru replied, wearing another fake smile to appease her. "See, I'm alright! Natsuki Subaru, reporting for learning duty!"
"Subaru, please stop," Noelle harshly told him off with a tone unlike her. "If I'm not going to help you here, then I will have failed as a maid. Subaru, sometimes it is important to seek help from others. I try to manage things by myself all the time, and I've been told all those times by Master Jean to stop and seek help from others instead. And in emulating her, I can ask you too to stop and seek help."
"Y-You don't get it. This is something only I can do. This is something I can't exactly talk about, no one's going to believe me."
"Please, just try. I will hear you out, Subaru."
Subaru felt his heart void even further as Noelle spoke, trying to pry into his problems. He did not want to bother the knights with this; he did not want any of them to get hurt. He saw them all fail in the past run, he knew that they wouldn't stand a chance. So, Subaru wanted to try and get himself better. But he can't. Not in time. The only way to become better at that rate would be to kill himself over and over again until he could build up his skills. And that was a reality that Subaru did not want to face, no matter what.
"You can't do anything. The Knights will only fail. I know you will."
"Please, let us try, then. Please, don't shut us out, Subaru. The Knights are meant to give their lives for such problems. If not the knights, then I will help you myself."
"N-Noelle…"
Subaru didn't know what to do. On one hand, he had to be brave to push himself further. On the other, he could also be brave enough to confess to Noelle and seek help. Brave as a Knight? What does that mean anymore? What does it mean to be brave in a circumstance such as this one?
"Noelle," Subaru said, making his decision. "The truth is… something big will happen today. Something terrible will happen to Mondstadt."
Noelle did not say anything, simply egging Subaru to continue.
"Mondstadt will be attacked… by Stormterror. Sometime after noon, about during lunchtime. The Knights will not be able to hold up against it.
"I will help you."
Subaru blinked at the sudden voice from Noelle. "Huh? What are you talking about? Noelle, I don't have any way to prove this! All I have is my word, and that's it!"
"No matter, I will still help you," Noelle firmly said with a smile. "I can see it in your eyes; you mean this, don't you? As a maid, it is my duty to help anyone in need. Subaru, you are clearly in need of help, and from your words, it seems that Mondstadt needs help too. So, don't worry. I will help you."
"I… Thank you, Noelle," Subaru finally relented. "But… aren't you going to ask me more about this? About how I got this info?"
Noelle curtly shook her head. "No, I trust you. The arrival of Stormterror is not a joke; it must be treated with utmost seriousness. So, even if it's just a suspicion, we will act on it."
Hearing Noelle's words, Subaru couldn't help but smile at her. He was so afraid of how other people would react to him knowing such things, but he was relieved that some were willing to accept him regardless.
"Okay then," Subaru said. "Let's tell the others, quick."
"Absolutely not."
With those words, all of Subaru's climbing hope fell apart like a house of cards.
"Noelle, even though Mr Natsuki helped us with the mitachurl, we cannot simply accept this at face value," the Acting Grand Master Jean told the both of them who approached her. "He hasn't even left Mondstadt in his time here; how would he have known about Stormterror's arrival, especially with his amnesia?"
"Please, can't you just trust me on this?" Subaru pleaded. "I know that Stormterror will show up today. I need your help to take care of it."
"Then why hadn't you mentioned this sooner?" Jean retorted. "If you're so sure about it, then you could have let us know sooner. Why didn't you?"
Subaru bit his lip upon hearing that question. "I… I wanted to try to handle this alone."
Jean crossed her eyes. "You, who just started to learn to use a weapon a few days ago, and who knows nothing about Mondstadt's history, wanted to defeat one of the Four Winds on their own?"
Subaru stayed silent, not knowing what to say to that.
"I'm sorry, Mr Natsuki, but I refuse to believe that someone could be so stupid," Jean harshly concluded. "Out of all the choices that I can conclude with, the safest one for you is my current one; you're just lying to demand attention."
"N-No, it's certainly not that!" Subaru yelled back, slamming his hands on Jean's desk in frustration. "You can come to whatever conclusion you want, you can even call me crazy and stupid! But please, don't risk your people like this!"
"Mr Natsuki, we have already sent out a party today to track Stormterror. We certainly are not doing nothing to face this threat. Even if Stormterror chooses to attack today, the Knights will certainly handle it."
"No, you won't!" Subaru yelled out, not being free of his fit of anger. "The Knights won't be able to do anything against it, it's so much stronger than all of you! When you face it, you're all going to – "
As if it were a cruel reminder, Return by Death chose to act against him at that moment and forbid him from speaking anymore.
"GAAAHHH!" Subaru couldn't help but yell as he gripped his chest from the fresh agony of his penalty, crouching low not only from the physical pain but the fact that he could not even justify himself to the others.
"Mr Natsuki, all I'm seeing here is that you need help. Please, don't make me change my conclusion as to what's going on with you."
"N-No… please… y-you can't endanger Mondstadt like this!" Subaru yelled out, tears flowing free from his eyes. "Please, you're heading into your deaths! Please do something about Stormterror now!"
"Master Jean, please consider his words," Noelle spoke up for him as well. "Wouldn't it be at least good to secure the people, just in case he is correct?"
"… Then what's your plan, Natsuki Subaru?" Jean said, still not foregoing her harsh stance. "What do you propose that we do against it?"
"I…" Subaru wracked his brain for something that they could do. However, every time he remembered how things were back then, all he thought of was that final beam of light that claimed his light, roasting his body alive.
"I don't know. I have no idea what to do."
"In that case, I'll entertain you for now," Jean finally said. "I'll suppose that Stormterror will arrive today. However, due to the short notice, the Knights will be indisposed in getting themselves ready for the defence. Noelle, can I leave it to you to bring the people to safety?"
"You certainly can, Master Jean."
"Wait, hold on a second!" Subaru yelled back at the two once they arrived at their conclusion. "Let me help too!"
"A-Ah, Subaru, you want to…" Noelle choked out, suddenly nervous about something.
"Yeah, I want to," Subaru said. "No, in fact, I need to. I need to be with you all. Please."
Jean stayed silent for a moment, then looked back at Subaru once again, her lips pulled tautly.
"And, pray tell, why would you want to join a battle against Stormterror when you barely know how to wield a weapon?"
"I-I've learned enough!" Subaru retorted. "I've covered the basics with Rosaria-san already. I've also learned to glide from Amber, so I can glide well! Won't you need gliders to fight a dragon?"
"Yes, but have you truly learned enough? For example, if we were to fight right now, would you defeat me? Even if you've defeated a mitachurl, do you think you can take on any Vision user, before an Anemo-blessed Dragon?"
To that question, Subaru couldn't help but hesitate. He may have gathered the basics of a polearm, but that was it. Just the basics. He hardly had any experience in a real-life scenario fighting against another, much less one who could wield a Vision.
"I… I can't," Subaru confessed. "But I still can – "
"Then there is nothing else to say. I'm sorry, Mr Natsuki, but I cannot allow you to participate in today's battle. Please head to the storm bunker beneath this building, Noelle will escort you there."
Subaru couldn't help but step back and widen his eyes at that statement. He wouldn't be allowed to join the battle? Then what had he worked so hard for? What had he sacrificed his time and effort for? After falling on the ground over and over from Amber's gliding training, memorizing the way that the paved ground of Mondstadt's well-walked roads felt on his face and his tongue? After burning his muscles off with repeatedly thrusting his spear out, all so he could do better in his next spar with Rosaria, which would still end up with him knocked back onto his ass? After learning with Noelle every morning, sacrificing his chance to keep practising his Radio Calisthenics all so he could know more about who it was he was fighting against?!
"W-Why?" Subaru choked out, the pressure of the past few days finally making its weight known from the tears under his eyes. "Why aren't you letting me join? After everything I've done for this?! You're not letting me join? You're not giving me the chance to prove myself?!"
"There's nothing for you to prove, Mr Natsuki. I'm sorry to say it, but you are not a knight. You're not even a seasoned adventurer. That is the only reason why I'm asking you to stay back. I will be making Noelle stay back for the same reason as well. Please don't think we are robbing you of any opportunities, this is just our duty as the Knights of Favonius. I promise you; we will defeat Stormterror."
"Y-You don't get it!" Subaru yelled out in his growing desperation. "The Knights… they can't do anything! Last time, they all died at –"
Subaru had not been careful with his words, he knew that the moment the world greyed out and froze. Once again, the Witch had come for him, threatening him a second time.
"GAH!" Subaru sharply gasped and collapsed onto his knees, feeling the agony of his recently cradled heart bringing him down alongside the defeat he was facing at the hands of those he once deemed friends.
"Subaru!" Noelle yelled, moving to him in concern. Jean herself looked troubled by his turnout, from her wary forward gait, approaching him ever so slowly.
"Why… Why can't I say anything!" Subaru cried out in agony from the bottom of his heart, looking up to the sky with his fists pulling on his hair, tears rapidly falling down his cheeks. "Why am I cursed with this damn -!"
As much as Subaru wanted to continue, he held his tongue before he could mention his ability. He did not want even the smallest chance of dying so soon, and he had no clue if summoning the Witch a second time would keep him alive.
"Natsuki Subaru, I truly am sorry," Jean spoke up, curtly bowing to him as Noelle gingerly held his hand, trying to calm him down. "I may not know what is going on with you, but I can see that it is causing you great distress. Unfortunately, I cannot change my stance on you joining the battle. I will believe that Stormterror is arriving today. I will amass the knights for battle immediately. But in return, please join Noelle in the storm bunker. Noelle, you may ignore my previous orders. Just stay with Subaru, make sure that he gets some company."
"No, stop!" Subaru desperately yelled out, shaking his tears off his face. "You can't! The Knights, they won't be able to defeat it! I have to help you!"
"Mr Natsuki, you clearly are distressed right now. Please, just head to the storm bunker and have some time to yourself. You're not thinking clearly now."
"Are you… are you saying that I'm not thinking clearly?! Please tell me you're not. I'm thinking as clearly as possible. I want to keep you all safe!"
In his budding rage, Subaru threw Noelle off himself and jumped into a stand, his still tear-stricken eyes holding a brimming fire within as he pointed a finger at Jean.
"You're all going to die against Stormterror! I know this for a fact! It doesn't matter if you have Vision bearers, you're still going to die! That's why I want to help! Let me die for you! That's the only way I can help! I want… I want to be brave! Brave as a Knight! I have to die to keep you all safe! It's the only way I can help! I… I'm absolutely useless unless I die!"
The silence that followed was a heavy one, for there were two kinds. Subaru did not contribute to the silence, for his head was far too noisy to register this silence in the first place, much less contribute to it. Noelle, for the first moment, broke the silence upon letting out a gasp of horror. However, this soon morphed into remorse. She wasn't able to imagine what the boy she'd known for those few days had been through if he held such a disposition in his heart.
Jean's silence, however, was what forced the weight into the room. She frowned a hard-set kind of frown, revealing how out-of-norm that expression was on her face. Her eyes were shadowed from the slight tilt of her head, bent low, for she was focused on the rising storm within her. By her hip, her Anemo Vision began to shine and flicker, as if it were responding to the tumultuous waves within its user's psyche.
"Natsuki Subaru," Jean breathed out, her voice lacking the emotion it used to carry. "Just who do you think the Knights are? Do you think we are a reckless set of buffoons, who believe that we must lay our lives down for our country? Do you think we are ruffians that throw ourselves into danger, all because we want to kill ourselves? Absolutely not. The Knights of Favonius are a trained group of men and women who are capable of defeating threats to Mondstadt without overtly harming themselves or any others! Brave as a Knight? Don't you dare mock our will with your blasphemy! We lay down our lives because we, among the rest among Mondstadt, have a greater chance of returning alive! You, who embrace death to the point of throwing yourself off a cliff for another, are someone who should never become a knight in the first place.
"After we defeat Stormterror, you, Natsuki Subaru, will be banned from attending the Knights of Favonius entrance exam. Someone as suicidal as you does not belong with us."
The weight of Jean's harsh words finally hit Subaru. She thought he was being reckless. She thought he has simply throwing his life away. She didn't know his life was a fucking boomerang. She didn't know that he could keep throwing his life away, and no one would be the wiser. She didn't know how he used this ability he was cursed with.
Looking up, he noticed Noelle speaking harshly against Jean. Probably for telling him off in such a manner. Just what did they think of him? Just what did he look like? Were the scars visible? Could they see what he'd been through?
No, they couldn't. Only he could see himself for who he truly was, within his reflection. And that was why Natsuki Subaru hated himself.
But what did he have left? If he didn't have this ability, what was he left with? He's just a hikikomori, someone who's too cowardly to leave Mondstadt because he's afraid of the monsters without. Someone who hadn't learned from his mistakes in Japan, repeating the same ones in Teyvat. He may have defeated a mitachurl and matched it in a tug of war, but how many times had he died to that very mitachurl before that? His only victory in this world was because of Return by Death. It was only because he knew how the mitachurl was going to attack that he knew how to avoid it. How to defeat it. Even if he had known about his strength and his proficiency over his whip, he would not have defeated the mitachurl if he'd just landed in Teyvat.
In the end, Natsuki Subaru was met with a simple fate. Death. For that was the only way that he could become somebody.
Making his decision, he reached back to the polearm behind him. Unlocking it from its harness, he held the bladed end of the weapon against his own throat.
He pushed inwards, fully intending to kill himself with his own weapon.
But nothing happened.
He kept pushing his blade into his throat, but nothing happened. Looking down, he noticed that the blade was against his throat, the tip pricking his skin and letting out a small drop of blood. However, nothing was holding it back. The end of the polearm was free. There was nothing between the tip and Subaru's neck. There was no reason why the polearm could be held back from the self-harming attack, except for one.
'Dammit, am I so cowardly that I'm unable to kill myself?! How many times have I died already? Aren't I willing to just die once again?!'
Gasping, Subaru dropped his weapon and clutched his knees. He started to rub his neck, trying to calm the point where he was pricked by himself. Looking up, he noticed something he should have realized sooner but had completely foregone in the urgency he created himself.
Noelle and Jean were staring at him, stupefied. They had just seen his attempt on his own life.
"N-Natsuki Subaru," Jean stammered out, clearly not having seen many who were so eager to kill themselves. "I'm afraid that I must restrain you. After that… display, I cannot in good conscience allow you to roam freely, all so that you can make another such attempt."
The light of her Vision lit up, as a vortex of wind formed on her palm.
"Please, Subaru, we do not wish to harm you. Do not resist this."
The first thing that Subaru did was resist. The moment he noticed Jean beginning to use her abilities, Subaru turned tail and started to run out of the office.
However, he couldn't.
Something was pulling him back. Something was vacuuming his body back. He could feel his feet slipping back as every step he took ahead was responded to by dragging his entire body back by the same distance. Looking back, he noticed that Jean was using the vortex forming in her palms to form that suction he was feeling, attracting not only him but other objects in the room to her direction.
However, that did not only include his body. This also included the books within the shelves near to him as well as a few trinkets placed on her table. However, out of them all, the most important candidate was Subaru's Iron Point, which was still lying on the ground after his attempt.
Jean noticed the arrival of the weapon, but she trusted in her Gale Blade. She knew that the concentration of Anemo energy she was building before herself would be enough to contain the weapon.
And that was what made Subaru's next words even more curious to her.
"I'm sorry about this, Jean-san. But if I can't die here, I need to stick to my original plan instead."
Looking ahead, Jean noticed Subaru turning back despite the pull on himself. However, just as he did, he picked up one of the books flying towards her Gale Blade ability. Suddenly, Subaru threw the book in her direction.
Jean was confused by this. A simple book would do nothing to her if she was behind her ability. However, upon noticing its path, she noticed something else.
The Iron Point was already within the vortex, beginning to move upright to the twirling forces. However, that book that Subaru had thrown was headed straight for the still rising tip of the weapon.
Jean watched the book collide with the tip of the weapon, further pushing it not only out of the vortex but right at Jean herself. Fearing the approaching blade, Jean held her sword arm up, only to notice the final piece of the puzzle that tied this move to Subaru's victory.
'I haven't summoned my sword.'
Finding herself unable to defend against the attack, she hastily ended her ability and braced herself for impact. However, just before it hit, something appeared over her body. A translucent hazel-coloured barrier formed around her, making the head of the approaching weapon thud as it uselessly collided off it.
Looking back, Jean noticed Noelle standing right behind her, having her own greatsword out. She then recognized the barrier around her. It was Noelle's Geo Shield.
"Thank you, Noelle," Jean said.
"It was my duty. But… he got away, Master Jean."
Looking ahead, she indeed saw no one standing before her anymore, with her door almost comically swinging from his departure.
"I'm sorry that you had to see him act in such a manner, Noelle, but we need to secure him for his own safety. I will be gathering the knights for the attack against Stormterror, but could I please ask you to find him and bring him back to the bunker?"
Noelle hastily nodded. "Leave it to me!"
The moment Subaru barged out of the Knights of Favonius Headquarters, he leapt off the ledge and activated his wind glider. He was lucky in being able to avoid Jean's attack, but he couldn't keep counting his lucky stars. He had to make it to the Market Square and get ready for the attack. Maybe even warn the others about the attack.
As he kept gliding, he couldn't help but feel like it was going rather slow. Instead, he dragged his wings back into their magnetic harnesses, only to deploy them once more just before he reached the ground. It was almost like a parachute; it held back his falling as he reached the floor. The moment he touched the ground, he dropped his arms to let his wind glider reconnect to its chassis before he ran down instead. He quickly noticed that it was much faster for him to run to his destination.
He jumped down the steps, not caring for anyone he might pass by or any steps he would miss. Knowing that someone was coming after him, probably Noelle, he had to outrun her.
He reached the road above the Market Square, the one connecting the levels holding the same Square and the Adventurer's Guild. Ignoring the blind glance that Glory offered him from her bench, Subaru ignored the stairs altogether and chose to just jump off the ledge between the two layers. However, what he hadn't noticed was that in his trajectory at the Market Square level was another familiar face.
"Oof!" Grace yelled out in agony as she was forced to the floor from being met by Subaru's falling body. The basket of apples she was carrying was now strewn all about the square, quickly catching the attention of every member there. The ones at the markets; Blanche and Sara, Timaeus at the alchemy station, Margaret, who all recoiled from the sudden fall and the flying apples since she was standing rather close to Grace at that moment. The few adventurers and other people sitting at Good Hunter, along with another familiar face.
"Stinky Space?!" Paimon called out from her table at Good Hunter, immediately flying to the two. "Why did you jump off the ledge, you idiot?!"
"A-Ah, are you alright?" Grace asked the moment she recovered from the fall and regained enough sense to stand back up. Looking back down, she noticed the boy who'd fallen on her, now face down on the ground. Upon shaking his shoulder, she was relieved to hear him groaning. As she slowly guided the boy to a stand while a… fairy, of some kind, watched the two, she briefly noticed the boy's face.
While the urgency in his eyes and the tear marks still visible marks on his cheeks were not things to ignore, they did not take as much precedence as another mark on the boy. There was a large welt on the boy's forehead. However, instead of simply swelling or bruising, the skin was cut instead, making blood drip out of it and trace the inner edges of his face.
"G-Grace-san?" the boy asked, despite her attempts at making him calm down. "L-Listen, you need to get Glory-san and r-run. Stormterror, it's coming."
"S-Stormterror?" Grace echoed. "But never mind that young boy, I don't think we've met before. How do you know my daughter's name and mine?"
"T-That doesn't matter, goddammit!" the boy all but yelled out, his gaze sharpening from his fall-induced daze after every word. "Didn't you hear me?! Stormterror is coming here! The typhoon and the tornadoes it'll bring are going to destroy everything in this city! You need to take your family and get to safety!"
"What are you talking about, Stinky Space?" Paimon asked, gently rubbing Subaru's still bleeding head. "What's Stormterror? And what's going on?! Paimon wasn't away for long, but she's already out of the loop!"
"That doesn't matter, Paimon, just help me with this! EVERYONE! STORMTERROR IS COMING! YOU ALL NEED TO ENTER YOUR STORM BUNKERS!"
As Subaru finished his yelling, all he was met with was silence. Cracking an eye open, he noticed that they were all simply standing stupefied at his presence.
"W-WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! HIDE! RIGHT NOW!" Subaru kept yelling. Seeing no one respond still, Subaru decided to try another approach.
Shaking his head, Subaru ran past the fountain to the first person he could see. "Margaret-san, go to shelter right now! Stormterror is going to show up, don't you get it!"
"Um, boy, just who are you?" she ended up responding. "That wound on your head looks nasty. And how do you know my name?"
"WHY DOES ANY OF THAT MATTER?! YOUR LIVES ARE AT STAKE HERE!"
"Boy, please, calm down," Margaret simply grabbed his shoulders and kept him secure. "Just breathe for a moment. Please, who are you?"
"HE'S RIGHT!" another voice called out, running up the square.
"Amber…"
"Everyone, please move to your shelters immediately!" Amber called out. "I've traced Stormterror to arrive at Mondstadt in just a few moments, so please move quickly!"
Upon hearing Amber's proposal, the public had a completely different reaction. Unlike Subaru, they chose to listen to Amber's words and immediately started to close up shop and wrap up their work all so they could move back to their homes and their bunkers.
"Subaru," Amber said as she walked up to him, now free from Margaret's arms. "How did you know about Stormterror? And what happened to your head?"
"Amber…" Subaru said, feeling another smidge of hope entering his heart.
"Go to a shelter right now! Get that treated quickly!"
And it was shattered in an instant.
"Amber, what?" Subaru asked. "You're… not asking me to join you? Like last time?"
"What?! Last time was completely different, Subaru! Sure, the mitachurl defeat was a miracle, but this is Stormterror we're talking about! And you're already injured! Please get some rest and sit this battle out!"
"Hey, what's going on here?" Paimon yelled at the two, hastily zipping to them.
"Paimon, you need to hide," Subaru said, hastily pulling out his whip. "I'm going to help battle Stormterror."
"No, you're not, Subaru!" Amber responded for the two, immediately resting her hand on the one that held his weapon. "Not when you're injured!"
"Amber, let go of me," Subaru commanded. "I hate to be so rough with you, but I've sacrificed too much for this encounter. I'm going to defeat him, no matter what!"
"Subaru… why are you acting like this?" Amber slowly asked, coming to terms with the change within Subaru. "Why are you trying to be so… stupidly heroic?"
"Because someone important to me asked me to be Brave. As Brave as a Knight."
"What are you talking about?! This isn't bravery, it's recklessness!"
"They're the same thing."
"No, they're not! Of course, they're not! Those two can't be any more different! Subaru, please don't throw your life away like this! Please, Subaru, i-if you want me to keep calling you a friend, you'll let us fight this battle and keep yourself safe!"
The moment she said those words, Subaru stayed silent, not knowing how to respond to such a situation.
That moment, however, was enough. Enough for the wind to begin moving faster, its roar becoming more and more audible. It was close.
"Amber… I'm sorry, but I'm just like you. If it's to keep you safe, I don't mind breaking my friendship with you either."
Amber was taken aback by Subaru's words. Stepping back in worry, she barely comprehended when the loud roar of Stormterror arrived, resonating across the entirety of Mondstadt. That roar was swiftly accompanied by the screams of the few stragglers left in Mondstadt out in the open, being afraid for their lives. This too, however, was shunned from the duo's ears.
However, it wasn't only Subaru's words that froze the girl. It was his eyes. His eyes were naturally scary, and the way that his blood traced the bridge of the nose only enhanced that effect. However, she recognized that look in his eyes. Every time she had tried to apprehend adventurer's that went out of control due to someone they had lost, she would see that expression in their eyes. It screamed to her that she could do nothing to stop him; he did not want to do this, but he was forced to. So, he would.
"I'm sorry, Amber, but I have to go."
Watching Subaru move towards the approaching threat, Amber was just stunned. She hadn't expected so much resolve from the boy. He kept surprising her. He shocked her by willingly stepping into a battle against a horde of hilichurls and a mitachurl. He shocked her by keeping up with that same mitachurl, despite not having a Vision or any accompanying self-support. And now, he'd shocked her by willingly stepping into the battle against Stormterror, with enough resolve to kill himself.
That being said, Amber knew that what he was doing was wrong. And for someone with as much resolve as him, Amber had no choice but to adopt enough resolve to keep him safe. The knights might get hurt without her involvement, and there might be more property damage, but as long as she kept those close to her safe, everything would be fine.
And that was why she was going to stop Subaru from sacrificing himself, no matter what.
Turning around with her new resolve blazing in her eyes, she noticed Subaru running into one of the tornadoes.
"Wait, Subaru, what are you - ?"
Amber gaped as she watched Subaru get swallowed by the tornado, pulling him into the sky. Gaping at the way he rose in the air, Amber couldn't help but be reminded of the other light his eyes held.
"You're… Do you want to die? Subaru, why would you…"
"Wha – What's going on, Amber?!" Paimon asked, just making it known that she was holding on to Amber's dress. "Why did Subaru jump into that tornado? And what's that dragon doing here?! Is that Stormterror?"
"Yeah, it is. As for Subaru… I have no idea."
Looking to the side, Amber noticed another figure running up to them.
"Outrider Amber! And… strange, yet respectable flying creature…" Noelle muttered. "Have you seen Natsuki Subaru? I believe you know who he is, but he's a dark-haired boy with – "
"He's up there!"
Following Amber's now pointing finger, Noelle traced it to the sky, just where one of the tornadoes were.
"No… was I too late?"
Suddenly, a figure burst out of the body of the tornado.
"SUBARU/STINKY SPACE!"
As mentioned, Natsuki Subaru used his wind glider to push himself out of the tornado as he had the last time. Regathering his bearings, Subaru looked out onto the horizon. However, he wasn't there to admire the view, no matter how beautiful it might have been. He had a target. That took priority over all else.
It wasn't difficult to find the massive dragon. He was glad to find out that he was now at a higher elevation than the dragon itself. Using his wind glider, he decided that he would land on the dragon's back and do as much damage as he could before he got thrown off. And once he did, he would push through the pain and repeat the entire process once more.
However, from the corner of his eye, he noticed something approaching him. Something he had seen before, yet had never expected to be on the opposing end of.
A flaming arrow.
Immediately, Subaru swerved out of the way to protect himself. However, just as he did, he noticed that the aim of the arrow was not him, but something else. It was aiming his wings.
Despite Subaru's dodging, the arrow still punctured a hole in his right wing. The sudden escape of pressure from the wind made him go off balance midair, forcing him to flail around and attempt to keep himself up only supported by one functional wing.
Having already been dizzy from riding the tornado, Subaru felt especially worse from the constant spinning of his now faulty wings. Gritting his teeth, he straightened his left wing and attempted to keep himself aloft. In a brief moment of peace, he noticed that he had lost far too much elevation, and there was no way he would make it to Stormterror's back. If he kept at his path, however, he would certainly reach the dragon's leg. He had to climb up, but that was okay.
Or it would have been if another flaming arrow hadn't pierced through his left wing as well.
It was almost comical. For a moment, Subaru felt like one of those cartoon characters who would stay suspended midair until they realized they weren't standing on the ground. However, Subaru could not force any laughter for this moment. If anything, he had to laugh at how ridiculously bad everything was turning out.
As he was forced to fall to his death due to the faults formed on his now burning wings, he couldn't help but reminisce about what had just happened.
There was no doubt about it; it was Amber that clipped his wings. It was Amber that took Subaru's freedom away. The one that he trusted so much was now the one that killed him.
Just as he closed his eyes, ready to accept his fate, he saw something beginning to surround him. It looked like an aura of some kind, but it had a solid shape; it encapsulated his entire body into a sphere. Gingerly placing a hand on it, he realized that it was solid, meaning that it was effectively jailing him inside.
Suddenly, his body jerked to the side.
Looking down, he noticed that the aura around him collided with another aura-built structure. And almost vertical slide, one that Subaru could see would even out into safe ground once he'd slowed down enough.
Rolling down the makeshift slide, Subaru couldn't help but tumble around within the hamster ball he was placed into. However, at the speed at which he was going, not only did it make him dizzy like normal, but it also hurt. Incredibly badly. He swore he felt a few bones breaking as he tumbled to the ground.
As soon as his elevation reached ground level, he was sent stumbling into a building, having been carried there by the construct slide. The shield around him, however, protected him from the debris. It didn't protect him from the tumbling, however.
After a rough minute filled with rolling, Subaru finally slowed to a stop. He was hurting badly, worse than anything he'd ever imagined. He couldn't move his limbs properly. He was sure that all his fingers were broken alongside most of his limbs. There was no way he could stand up in that situation, even as the shield dissipated soon after.
"Subaru!" Amber cried out, approaching the grievously injured boy. "Don't worry, we'll get you help. I swear, I won't let my mistake remain affecting you! But you need to thank Noelle for that entire system she built!"
"I've… huff… never used my Vision like that before…" Noelle muttered, using her sword as a support as she walked. "Amber… thank you for that idea."
"Doesn't matter. Help me carry Subaru! We need to get him to Barbara, immediately!"
"Can I help you both instead?"
The two girls looked to the side to see another strange person approaching them.
"Rosaria?" Amber asked. "Thank the Archons you're here! Quick, help us get Subaru to a hospital!"
"Don't worry. I'll take him myself."
"Huh?! But I need to help him too! I did this to him!"
"Listen, Amber, the knights are rallying before the KoF HQ," Rosaria revealed. "They are all gathering for a unified attack against Mondstadt. I believe that as one of our few ranged attackers, you must be joining them.
"Noelle, there are several people still out there. They all need support. Moreover, you seem too tired to do anything after the way you had used your Elemental Energy just a moment ago.
"Don't worry, either of you. I'll bring Natsuki Subaru to safety."
Upon hearing her words, Amber gingerly looked back at Subaru. She knew that she was the one who fired those arrows at him, but she did not want him to get hurt attacking Stormterror. If only she'd thought further as to how to save Subaru from the fall that would follow. Noelle's actions kept him from dying, yes, but Amber couldn't help but feel guilty for what she did.
'Was this… what you felt, Subaru? No, I don't think I understand what you feel anymore.'
"I… will go then," Amber begrudgingly replied. "Please, Rosaria, keep him safe. Please, I don't want him to die because of me."
"Don't worry. He won't."
Nodding, Amber and Noelle quickly took their leaves to battle the threat.
"He won't have to die by your hands," Rosaria continued now that no one other than Subaru was there to hear. "I will kill him myself."
Subaru's pain was enough to force him out of his extreme dizziness. Just enough for him to not only hear those words that Rosaria muttered but even process them. Enough for him to register the new danger he found himself in.
At that moment, he couldn't help but remember Kaeya's warning to be careful around her.
"Natsuki Subaru, I know you can hear me," Rosaria said as she walked up to him, suddenly summoning her lance in her free hand. "I've heard everything you did, you know? I've been watching you ever since we shared that cigarette. All so I could arrive at the conclusion I came to today."
Rosaria then flipped Subaru's body over, forcing him to be belly side up. Subaru painfully groaned at the way his bones moved around from the motion but was then forced to stop as he felt a familiar prick on his neck.
Rosaria was holding the opposite end of her blade against Subaru's throat.
"How did you know about Stormterror's attack?" Rosaria asked. "How did you know how he would attack? You have amnesia, an awfully convenient excuse. But that certainly does not explain how you know so much about one of the Four Winds. Explain this to me, Natsuki Subaru, and I might let you live."
Subaru couldn't say anything to that. He wanted to come up with an excuse, but his mind was still too foggy to come up with something. Gritting his teeth, he pushed his mind to its limits. He forced himself to come up with an excuse. He didn't know if it were because he was on the brink of death, but for some reason, he came up with a good reason in just a few seconds.
'In those few days before I'd reached Mondstadt, I was watching the dragon. I was studying its patterns, and I knew it would attack Mondstadt soon. I had to defeat it, so I staged my defeat of the mitachurl by convincing Amber, all so I could enter Mondstadt and defeat the dragon. I still want to keep the people in Mondstadt safe, no matter what! Please, believe me when I say this!'
Just as Subaru finished saying this, he looked back at Rosaria's face to see what she'd say back.
Her expression was not any different. She did not say anything back. She did not move. She still kept her blade against Subaru's throat.
'What… Why isn't she saying anything?'
"Silence? Very well, I will take it that you have nothing to say. In that case, I will confirm that you are a threat to Mondstadt right now."
'Silence, she says? What is she – oh. I hadn't said my piece out loud, hadn't I? My voice isn't working after that fall.'
"Just know, Natsuki Subaru, that this is not personal. This is just my job."
*SQUELCH!*
Natsuki Subaru died from being stabbed in the throat by Rosaria.
A/N: Yeah, rough one, I know. Maybe it's not as cringey as the actual series, but this is a perfect reflection of Subaru's current character as far as I can see. Sure makes up for it being the unlucky 13th chapter, even though I don't believe in that myth in the slightest. I'm a Hindu, whaddya expect?
Now, I get that people can different perceptions to this chapter. I'd love to hear how you saw the actions taken here. Who do you think was right, Subaru or the Knights? I believe it's the Knights, but there's a chance my vision is skewed. Since that's one of the worst things that can happen to a writer, I'd love to hear your views. Honestly, even more than favorites and follows, I appreciate reviews. Please leave behind more of them, giving me your feedback or any changes you'd love to see.
I've also been considering an omake series for this one; where Aether and Lumine end up in Luginica. It's an omake for a reason, I don't expect there to be a lot of development to it due to how OP those two are in their true forms. But I might write that from the next chapter onward. Now, to think about ways to make it interesting...
Speaking of interesting concepts. The next death arc is gonna be fun. I've already written out the next chapter. It's pretty short, judging by how quickly this one came out, but I love it. It's gonna be completely new material.
Know that my iteration of Natsuki Subaru may not resonate with the real one made by Teppei Nagatsuki. I'm way too introverted to properly portray his actions. That's not all, I'm saying that his current views and experiences is taking him down a completely different train of thought than in canon. One thing I can say for certain, though, Subaru is more of a coward in this one. It's harsh to those afflicted by it, but I do believe that hikikomori's in general are as they are due to their fears taking over themselves; that's not something that disappears after being taken to another world. I'm more of a half-hikikomori myself, so I understand it. People like us need help to get out of our shells more than anything. Since Subaru is naturally extroverted, however, things become easier for him to handle.
Now, onto reviews!
Senji2: Sorry, but I don't plan to have him learn anything else. The polearm in itself can be pretty complex to master, it just doesn't make sense to learn to use a sword too. Also, remembering his beatings from Julius, I really don't think he'd be skilled enough for it.
Flavio: I wholeheartedly agree with you with how you're describing Subaru's and Emilia's relationship. Subaru certainly does rely on her since she's the only one who hasn't damaged him in some way or the other. However, you can't help but ignore that his initial reaction to her was pure infatuation and nothing else, which was only further affirmed. Sure, Emilia saved him from the TonChinKan trio, but her good deeds only affirmed his existing infatuation for her.
I can't rAeally explain any more on this. I've never fallen in love before, so I can't explain it properly. I may be misinterpreting something.
However, I respectfully disagree with your claim that his reaction in episode 16 isn't normal. Aside from his desire to self-harm, Subaru has arguably the worst case of PTSD in existence. That's what's giving rise to my Natsuki Subaru iteration's spectrophobia. And the worst part about his condition is that due to the inability to speak about it, he cannot seek therapy for it. His incredible mood shifts in episode 16 are not unexpected due to this.
Also, you're halfway into the series, huh? Don't quit at it. Even if certain moment become difficult to handle, the payoff in the end is fruitful. And yes, there will be a ton of tragic moment in the series.
Majin Othinus: Thanks for that! Really appreciated. And no, Subaru won't be meeting Qiqi until he reaches Liyue. However, after this arc, I certainly can arrange to have him meet Klee.
MetallicCube: Honestly, I literally did drop the series after those episodes. My excuse was that I had to sleep and I had other university work to finish, but inherently, I knew that I could not handle any more pain that the series gave me. Imagine my surprise when I continued it on one bored day, and I was smacked in the face by the Rem confession scene.
Basically, I know exactly what you mean. I can try to mitigate it to some extent, but what takes priority is that Subaru maintains his real mindset as much as possible.
worrierfierce: Well, you have your answer right here. Bet you didn't expect Rosaria to turn out like this, huh? Although, it certainly is within her character, especially after how suspiciously Subaru was acting.
RandomGuest: Thanks for leaving reviews on my chapters! Please keep at it, I'd love to keep reading them!
And that's all, folks! I'll see you next chapter!