-R-
He isn't cross with Calleigh, or even in rage. If at all he is somewhat hurt, but that's not her fault because she doesn't know anything at least – as far as he knows.
It would be disastrous if she would know! Definitively it would be too strange for her and she might end up their friendship.
Well, probably she wouldn't do that, but Ryan can't stop thinking about it and that this could happen. These thoughts seem to jump in his mind and to fix themselves – only can be blown away with a huge portion of optimism and self-confidence. And that's exactly what he lacks.
But just in this case, at work he isn't that shy and undecided, no, at work he feels strong and self-assured. Concerning relationships it is the other way round: than he is a confirmed pessimist who tends to sink in self-pity. That's what he hates himself for: why isn't he able to check himself and to tell Calleigh, what her little sentence caused in him.
Why he can't simply invite her for a drink?
Before IT happened, he would have done it easily - what of it?
But IT happened anyway and now he can't do it anymore. So stupid! It would be more logical and useful if it goes the other way round (again).
Ryan knows how foolish he seems when he always sends Eric to Calleigh, just to avoid her.
Sooner or later she wants to know what's going on with him – and then?
What should he tell her? He even doesn't know what to tell Eric, so how could he explain it to her?
He decides to check himself. Somehow everything will work – it HAS to work. If not, well, then…then he has to leave. But it must not going this far and it will not!
-C-
Perhaps she was wrong and Ryan wasn't angry; or he hides it very good. Perhaps he just needed one day to get over with it…
In any case: now he is his old self again. No Eric to bring her Ryan's results, no, Ryan is doing it personally. In some way he seems to be stressed as if he was forced to do it, but anyway: he was doing it!
You can read Ryan's eyes like a book: just a short look and you know immediately how he feels. Why it is this way Calleigh doesn't exactly know – perhaps it because of this sparkling in his eyes: sometimes it seems sad, sometimes enraged, sometimes disappointed, and even horrified, to name but a few - you might find thousands additional feelings there.
In the following days this little unnatural expression on his face disappears – slowly but at least it is gone, and Ryan gets back on talking normally to her again. No more of nervous fluttering and convulsive grin. He seems to have forgotten it after all and she is very relieved - so relieved that she can actually laugh with Ryan again.
„There's something wrong with the weather." Ryan suddenly says. He is standing next to Calleigh and watching her analyzing the victims' clothes.
„What?" Calleigh straightens herself and looks at him. His view rests on the jacket she is holding in her hands and it seems as if he would dream, as if he's wool-gathering.
„The beautiful weather doesn't fit to the death."
She fixes him with her eyes, seems trying to awake him.
He closes his eyes for a second and then looks directly into her face after opening them again.
Calleigh realizes that in this special light his eyes seem to be green, not dark brown as usual. She never saw it before, but decides to pay attention on it.
„So many murders happen here, every day, but the sun keeps on shining the hole day, not one single cloud to see – that doesn't fit."
She says nothing, just looks at him a little confused.
He stares at his hands, embarrassed: „That was just a small philosophical throw-in."
-R-
Sweet? Did she really say this or did he just understand what he wanted to?
After she finished her batch this way the room turns quiet for a while. He didn't know what to say, his face got hot and Calleigh concentrates back on the jacket again she needs to analyze, a smile on her face.
How does she always achieve to confuse him this hard? At one time she talks of dating this guy Marc and another time she tells him that she finds him sweet – or that he IS sweet. Well, that's pretty much the same, isn't it? Yes, it is.
Perhaps it doesn't mean anything. Well, definitively it doesn't do. She only told him to brighten up his mood. Why, the hell, did he start talking about the weather? Now, after all, it sounds completely stupid.
He only wanted to say something, some spirited words…spirited, haha, he finally made a fool of himself!
-C-
Sweet? Why did she say it? Okay, she could have just THINK it, but not telling him straight!
She finds Ryan – as she already implied – cuddly, for real. Like a teddy bear. But did she have to tell him? No, not really.
The word just slipped out, she couldn't do anything to avoid it.
Afterwards she is annoyed for what happened. What if Ryan raises hopes just because of her?
Well, if it's true at all. There's still a very slight possibility that it's not and than it doesn't matter anyway.
Now it's end of the work day. There she stands, watching how Ben Madigan, the murderer of Sarah Znoyd, is lead away in handcuffs. He shortly shows Calleigh a hostile view, then he is pushed in the police car.
She feels a faint air draft behind her and knows without turning around who it is.
"I'm glad it was him and not the mother.", she hears Ryans' harsh voice from behind.
She has to smile, but still doesn't turn around to him.
"Perhaps it sounds strange, but so am I."
Together they watch the policemen entering the car, too, and driving away. As the car is nothing more than a small point in the distance she finally turns towards Ryan.
„Still clear weather, isn't it?"
Ryan looks at Calleigh as if he doesn't know what to say now. His small mouth wears this faint hidden smile again, his eyes – now dark again – are alertly focused on her. He seems to be touched a bit embarrassing.
Calleigh has to smile again. She takes a look at the fields which extended behind the Miami Dade Headquarters and are spotlighted by the rays of the sun.
"Are you disposed for a little walk?"
There it was again! Suddenly she had said it, just because. Again it just slipped out. It seems as if she has lost control of the things she wants to say, as if her mouth wants to do what he wants. Let there be no more of this. In the end she might say something more, she doesn't want to think about it – all the others could regard her as a kook!
But now it is spoken it out, there's no return.
No return: that sounds so… negative. Anyhow the weather is actually clear, sunset, and she really feels the wish to rank the fields – but not on her own.
Ryan's gaze doesn't change, he only bows his head.
"Okay."
Side by side they're walking, slow, strolling. Their hands are dangling nearby, just a few centimetres off…
-------------------
haha….gripping? xD