"It is with deep sadness that I speak to all of you today. Our community has been attacked on baseless and false ideologies at an event that was meant for joy and celebration. Every single member of the Ministry is deeply, deeply saddened by this tragic and horrific attack. We extend our thoughts to the families of those who have been injured and to the families of those who have been killed.
"It is with great regret that I announce that following the attack of terrorism on the 31st December, 1977, we enter 1978 in a state of war against the ideology or belief that wizards and witches with no ancestral magic are lesser than those with.
"All who align themselves or express agreement with Lord Voldemort's ideologies, can and will be detained by the Ministry for questioning. The Ministry will be relocating all resources to catch and capture Lord Voldemort and his followers who call themselves, Death Eaters. The consequence of being in league with Lord Voldemort is a life sentence in Azkaban.
"The Ministry will give their best efforts to bring justice for the families that have suffered under Lord Voldemort's terror and the Ministry will prosper until victory is celebrated."
Everyone in the waiting room was quiet as the Minister of Magic's words reverberated and echoed. Lily wanted to laugh. 'Enter a state of war'. It had to be a joke. Voldemort had been at large since the early seventies and only now, when a pureblood and Ministry organised event was attacked, did the Ministry see.
Only when four members of four prominent families died did the Ministry care. An Abbott, a Weasley, a Crouch and a Bulstrode.
She wanted to scream and scream and scream. Why did it take something like this for them to see? Weren't the muggle deaths enough? Weren't the executions of 'blood traitors' enough? Why did it take twenty-seven people dying? Why did it take fifty-three people being injured?
Lily was pulled out of her thoughts, out of her senseless questions, by Peter.
"They haven't got a clue how to stop him, do they?" he asked, quietly as the waiting room filled with hurried whispers and Sirius had thought that perhaps Peter had never spoken truer words.
The Minister spoke of winning the war and bringing justice and yet he managed to sound like a seventh year declaring they were going to be top in the year despite failing for the previous six.
"Blind leading the blind," Sirius muttered.
"At least they've admitted that we are actually in a war."
"They've only been in denial for about five years," Sirius muttered.
Lily tuned them out again. Their world was being thrown into absolute madness and the sad thing was, it was completely overdue.
"Is there a Miss Vance? A Miss Alice Vance?" A healer called out, squinting at a note on a clipboard.
Alice stood up, "Yes?" she said breathlessly, waiting to hear something. Good or bad, she was prepared. At least, she thought she was.
"Come with me."
Lily watched as Alice stumbled over to the healer, asking questions about Frank, about Emmeline. Lily listened to the clipped tone of the healer who informed Alice that Frank Longbottom was brought in twenty minutes ago and that he'd been asking for her. The voice disappeared as Alice and the healer disappeared behind a door.
"It's been two hours since the fighting stopped," Lily said standing up suddenly. "Why hasn't James come to find us?"
"He could be getting questioned," Sirius said quietly.
"Or he could be getting healed," Remus added in the same quiet tone.
Or he could be one of the twenty-seven.
Lily paced. "And what about his parents?" She continued to pace and pace, itching at her throat as if to help her breathe as she asked questions no one knew the answer to.
"Lily you're going to burn a hole in the floor," Ella said. "Come sit."
If Lily had been in a right state of mind, she'd have asked Ella about the bruises on her face. She might have even been concerned presently but she wasn't, and Ella's bruised face was a scribbled reminder in the margins of her brain. Something to ask about later. Something to be concerned about later.
She sat besides Ella but not a moment after her butt had hit the sit was there a healer calling out, "Sirius Black and Lily Evans!" Lily was up in an instance, Sirius right next to her.
They approached the healer, a man with dark blonde hair and a kind face.
"Hello, I'm Healer Lane." He briefly shook their hands before getting to the point. "Mr and Mrs Potter has given us clearance to inform you of their situation. The Potters were brought to the hospital an hour ago, Mrs Potter with a broken hip, Mr Potter with minor burns on his legs and their son, James, was unconscious."
"Was?" Lily clung onto the word.
"He is awake and all of his minor injuries have been healed however," the healer paused and Lily wished that he wouldn't. Sirius' hand slipped into hers and squeezed, she squeezed back. "Young Mr Potter was hit by an unknown curse that has rendered him unable to walk. Our healers are still performing tests on him to find out if it is reversible."
"If?" Lily whispered, the same time Sirius asked, "Can we see him?"
"Young Mr Potter is still under examination however I can permit you to see Mr and Mrs Potter. I'm sure they'd appreciate a familiar face."
Lily wanted to shout, demand he let her see James but her mind stopped working, too many things crowded her mind and like Ella's bruised face, the need to shout was a scribbled note in a margin. Instead she found herself nodding alongside Sirius and they followed the healer into the same door that Alice went through.
He woke with the sound of screams in his ears. He wanted to know who was screaming and why. He wanted to help them but he couldn't move. A face hovered over his, talking to him but he couldn't hear her over the screaming. The screaming … he couldn't see who it was if only this strange woman would move out of the way.
"Mr Longbottom, you're okay but you've been sedated which is why you can't move," the woman was speaking but it sounded so foreign. "You have very intensive burns across your body," she continued, "and the treatment requires you to be still. Mr Longbottom, if you could stop screaming — you're okay." Her voice was calm, neither sad nor happy. Couldn't she hear the screaming? He had to help. He had to. That was his job and so many people needed help.
The doors were alive with fire that shot out and struck people who got too near. Men in masks and black robes went around striking down anyone they could, flashes of green hitting the walls, hitting people who fell instantly. So many people needed help.
Moments, minutes, hours passed and then Alice. His sweet, beautiful Alice.
"Frank?" she whispered, laying her soft hand on his cheek. "Frank, you're okay. I'm here, you're okay."
The screaming stopped. Maybe it had been him after all. Huh. He'd been so sure that he needed to help.
"You need to drink this," she told him and she held a small purple vial but she didn't wait for him to respond, he wasn't sure he could respond, before pouring it down his throat. The taste made him gag but he managed to swallow and suddenly he wanted nothing more than to sleep. "You'll be okay, honey." She leaned over and pressed a kiss to his forehead lightly. The last thing he remembered before the darkness was the sweet scent of Alice — like jasmine and sweet pea — and he knew.
Sirius went in first. He'd stepped aside to let Lily through first but she had shaken her head. Sirius didn't mind, he needed to see that they were going to be okay. Needed to be sure, to have the indisputable proof ingrained into his memory because, though he'd never admit it to anyone — except maybe James — losing Mr and Mrs Potter would effect him more than losing his own parents.
Euphemia and Fleamont's beds were placed next to each other, about three meters apart. They were both sitting up, listening to the wireless that was on Fleamont's bedside table.
"Hello," Sirius greeted. "How're you?"
"We're just fine, dear," Euphemia assured with a smile, "They'll say I can start walking again tomorrow and Fleamont's salve is fixing up his burns nicely. It's James we're concerned about."
"James'll be alright," Sirius said because that's what you say.
"You don't know that," Lily said having finally followed Sirius into the room. "Is there any family I should contact for you?" Lily asked Euphemia and Fleamont.
"Now that you mention it, if I wrote some letters, would you be able to send them off with an owl?"
"Of course." Lily sat on a plastic chair between the two beds, conjuring another for Sirius. "Have you seen James at all?"
Euphemia patted her hand as Fleamont said, "We saw him at the party in the middle of all that commotion, almost stopped my heart." Sirius didn't miss the way her lips pursed ever so slightly and he knew it, he'd seen those pursed lips too many times not to know. "Saved Mia from getting hit by the Cruciatus though."
"I would have rather gotten hit by it than him," Euphemia said, momentarily cross. "We're just lucky he was only under for a second before an Auror intervened."
"He got hit by the cruciatus?" Lily asked weakly.
"He's fine, darling — blew up a wall five minutes later," Euphemia assured her. "He helped a lot of people escape."
"That's James," Sirius grinned. "I think we got our first ever detention for blowing up a desk in Potions."
Euphemia rolled her eyes. "The amount of owls I have gotten because you two blew something up."
"I'm really glad you're both okay," Sirius said, his grin dimming to a sincere smile.
"We know, son." Fleamont said it firmly and it wasn't often that Mr and Mrs Potter referred to Sirius as their son but when they did, it lit Sirius up from the inside out.
Alice came into the waiting room, her eyes red raw and she didn't know if it was better or worse that her friends were all there.
"Alice," Adaline called softly, shifting over to make room between her and Ella. "How was Frank?"
Alice sat down and rested her head on Adaline's shoulder. "The healer's say if the treatment goes well he should be fine but his heart or organs could go into shock from the burns." Tears dripped down her face and Adaline grabbed her hand.
"He'll be all right."
"I still haven't heard anything about Emmy," Alice said hollowly, trying to remain positive. It could be a good thing that she hadn't heard from Emmeline yet, it didn't mean she was hurt or … she could just be busy with the Order.
"Emmeline was at the party?" Ella asked.
"Yeah." Alice paused and then deciding Ella had the right to know her brother was in danger tonight, added, "She went with your brother."
"My brother?" Ella perked. "Since when do our brother and sister go out together?"
Alice shrugged and said, "I don't know," even though she did. "You haven't heard anything from Doc then?"
Ella shook her head frowning. "I didn't even know to worry about him," she murmured but she remembered what she'd forgotten. The muggle suit. He'd left in a muggle suit.
Silence fell and the reporter over the wireless kept talking as families and friends huddled around together, some crying, some anxious and some stony faced. It was the most morbid place any of them had ever been.
"Witnesses are coming forward and sharing their experience of this horrific event however for reasons they wish to remain anonymous. I have Mr X here with me now. Mr X, how did the Death Eaters attack?"
"They came through all entrances and exits and used enchanted fire to block the exits, it reached out and burnt people who got too close. They were killing based on blood. From what I saw, purebloods were only stunned or hexed to keep them out of the way."
"What did you see?"
"One Death Eater was about to use an unforgiveable on me but another," the man's voice broke, "Another stopped him because I am a Lovego — from a pureblood family."
The reporter finished the interview quickly after the man let slip his last name, probably not deeming it safe to risk anymore survivors names in case Death Eaters targeted those families.
"Idiot," Ella sighed wondering how long they'd have to wait to see his names in the Deaths columns in the Daily Prophet.
Her brother's name could be in that newspaper.
The thought hit her with a lurch and a lump in her throat grew and grew. Everyone in this waiting room was probably thinking this but it couldn't be him. It couldn't be Caradoc Dearborn was dead because he was her brother and he couldn't be gone. So like everyone else in this waiting room, she pushed it out of her mind. Her brother was fine. And James would be fine. And Frank would be fine. And Emmeline would be fine. They would all be fine.
"Hey, Lils," he said as she walked to his bed.
He was sitting up in bed and he was fine. There wasn't a scratch in sight. She couldn't guess that he couldn't walk if she didn't already know. Wouldn't know that he'd been under the cruciatus if his parents hadn't told her.
"Still can't walk?" she asked, hoping that he'd tell her different. Wishing that this was one of his stupid pranks where he was just telling them he couldn't walk to send them on some medical goose chase. One of those pranks that only Sirius would find funny.
He grabbed her hand in both of his, pressing a kiss to her hand. "I'll be fine … the tests so far are showing that it wasn't a dark curse so it should be completely reversible … once they figure out the counter spell or potion or whatever."
"Once they figure — should be," she said in a daze and he pressed another kiss to her hand but she yanked away. "You can't walk!" she exploded.
It took James a considerable amount of time to calm Lily down as she paced around the room throwing her hands about and shouting. She seemed to be stuck on the 'James can't walk' bit despite having hours to process it.
"It's the only bit!" she'd exploded again. "This could have been avoided if you didn't have some moronic need to be the hero!"
"Oi, I didn't plan to get hit by a spell and my parents, hell most of my family was at that damn party, of course I was going to go help them," James defended.
"You're not even out of Hogwarts! You had no business running into that battle! And your parents are fine and they would've been fine if you had just waited!"
"No they wouldn't have," James argued. "Why do you think I got hit? Mum had fallen down the stairs, she couldn't walk, I saw a spell heading towards her so-"
"So you took the cruciatus for her! Yes, I know, Potter!"
"If it was your mum, what would you have done?" he asked her and she hated that he could keep so calm. Hated that he was right. Hated that he'd gotten hurt.
She sighed, sinking back onto the bed and facing him. "Merlin, James." He tucked her hair behind her ear and she leaned forward leaning her forehead against his, his hand cupping her face.
"Forgive me for having a moronic need to be the hero?" he whispered.
"You're going to give me grey hairs and I'm not even eighteen yet."
"There're spells for that." He pressed a light kiss to her lips. "You've visited mum and dad then? Are they all right?"
"They're fine. Healer Lane wants to keep them for observation until tonight, Sirius and I will take them home."
"Thank you," he whispered.
"They're your parents, of course." She leaned her head against his. "I hate you, you know?"
"Why's that?"
"There's just about nothing I wouldn't do for you at this point," she whispered because it terrified her. She knew that had Remus not held her back, she would have apparated blind to find him. She'd have walked through fire to get into that party and she'd have taken a cruciatus for him too. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, his hand under her hair on the back of her neck and breathed, "Me too."
Sirius, Remus and Peter walked into James' room carefully, not knowing how to act around James since he couldn't walk. Lily had told them, quite angrily, that he had seemed fine about the whole thing as though it was only a minor inconvenience but they had thought that he was just putting on a bravado. James Potter couldn't possibly last five minutes without moving his legs.
The guy was the worst desk partner in history for his inability to keep his damn legs still. Shifting them around every ten minutes and bouncing his left leg as if he had balls on the heels of his shoes.
"You okay?" Peter asked, stepping closer first.
"Brilliant," James confirmed.
"You can't, er, walk though," Peter said confused.
"Right you are, Wormtail," James agreed. "I'm seeing it as a new adventure. The healers wheel me around everywhere, it's pretty cool. It's like everyone is my personal assistant."
"But you can't walk," Remus pointed out.
James shrugged. "They'll fix me once things calm down."
"But you can't walk," Peter repeated.
James furrowed his brows, "Yes," he said slowly. "Why is everyone so sure this is a bad thing?"
"Let's see," Remus said, "You're a human, human's walk which you can't do so — Peter keep tally — that's a point for 'James not walking is bad'. Two, you can't stay still for more than a minutes so that's another tally in the 'James not walking is bad' column. Three, you're a quidditch player and that's putting it lightly."
"He breathes and lives quidditch," Sirius injected.
"Exactly so point in 'James not walking is bad' column. Now let's see, good points," Remus mocked thinking, "Well James can't walk so I suppose — Nope! Still a bad thing. How many's that?"
"Four," Peter supplied, holding up his fingers to show James.
"But think of the possibilities," James considered. "I could break a lot of records."
"Like?" Peter asked.
"First bloke to ride a broom without function of his legs."
"You cannot ride a broom without being able to move your legs," Remus deadpanned.
"Don't be such a downer, Moons," Sirius said, flopping into a chair. "I'd help him, catch him when he falls all five feet because he can't kick off the ground."
"Just because it seems impossible doesn't mean it is. I mean, does anyone really believe my dad's potion works on my hair? Because it does even though it seems impossible."
"It seems impossible that your dad's hair taming potion works on your hair?" Remus asked, sarcasm lacing his voice.
"His hair is quite a mess," Peter argued.
"I don't think anyone's hair could fight the power of SleakEzy," Sirius said. "If anything it'd be more impossible for hair to be unaffected by Monty's potion."
James huffed. "It's not that great."
"Yeah it is, mum used to make me drink it all the time," Sirius said, "Honestly, it's why I think my hair's turned out so great."
"I'm sure that's the reason and not because you drink a teaspoon of it every morning," Peter commented.
"Shh," Sirius said, looking around, "No one can learn my secrets."
The boys rolled their eyes. "Was Lily still mad?" James asked quietly.
"Yeah," Peter said, "I think she's just scared."
James nodded. He didn't need Peter to say it to know it.
Alice needed Frank to wake up now. Like right now. Laying unconscious for several hours because of severe burns was fine but laying unconscious in a room where Alice was alone with his mother was just downright rude. She'd decided that after Mrs Longbottom tried attempt number four to persuade Alice out of becoming an auror.
"Look at my darling Frank," she said, "Wouldn't it be terrible for your children to see you in this state because you're an auror."
"I don't have children, Mrs Longbottom," Alice said trying to keep the impatience out of her voice.
"Yes, yes but one day."
"One day very, very far, far away," Alice confirmed, not sure if she'd put enough 'very's and 'far's into her sentence.
"Time flies," Mrs Longbottom continued, "Before you know it you'll be out of Hogwarts and getting married and the little ones come along so quickly it's impossible to imagine where the time went."
"Well," Alice said, "Frank and I have agreed that until the war ends, our careers come first."
This put Mrs Longbottom on a spiral about how they shouldn't put their lives on hold because of a silly war and after about a minute of this Alice's patience really wore thin and she cut Mrs Longbottom off and said, "Great! Why don't you tell Frank to become a shopkeeper and raise the kids and I'll be an auror?"
"Alice?" there was a knock at the open door.
Alice looked at her sister, still in her silver dress but her almost brown locks had fallen out of it's bun and her make-up was smeared, blood on her dress but despite all that, relief flooded in.
"Emmy!" She got up running around the bed and hugging her sister tightly. "Oh thank god! I kept asking them about you but they said you hadn't been admitted and I had no idea where to look…"
"Ally," Emmeline pulled out of the hug, "I need to tell you something."
Emmeline closed the door so it was just Emmeline, Alice, a snooping Mrs Longbottom and an unconscious Frank. Words left Emmeline's mouth and they were so quick, Alice was sure she'd misheard.
"She wasn't even at the party! Mum and dad went to Aunt Susan's!"
"She's the Head of the Auror Office and a Ministry event was being attacked. They killed her. I — I saw it."
"No," Alice shook her head but she could feel the tears pricking. "She can't be."
Emmeline pulled Alice in for a hug, "I know."
And Alice cried. Loudly. Uncontrollably. Heavily.
Ella was sitting by Caradoc's bed when the door opened. Emmeline had been a wreck when she'd come to find her. She was in a silver dress that would have been pretty without the blood stains and Ella knew what Alice had said about Emmeline and Caradoc going to the party together must have been true.
Emmeline had told her in a daze what room Caradoc would be in and that he was unconscious but the healers said he'd be fine once he woke up.
"You okay?" Ella had asked.
"Mum's dead and I have to go tell Alice now."
The words shocked Ella and sent rhythms of sympathy coursing through her.
"Oh, Emmeline," Ella sighed before pulling Emmeline into a hug.
"I don't know where she is."
"She's with Frank. Room three-oh-seven. Mrs Longbottom requested a room with the number seven."
Emmeline nodded dazedly before walking off and with nothing else to do, Ella went and found her brother. He looked as though he were just sleeping so when the door opened, Ella just assumed it'd be a healer or someone but not him.
"How is he?"
Ella's entire being seized up in an instant. She didn't know how she got the next words out but she did. She had to.
"I — you need to leave."
"Come on, honey, don't be like that," her father pleaded. "I was just-"
"Drunk and angry, yes I know!" Ella snapped, whirling around to face him. She didn't know whether the sight of her face had stupefied him into silence but his silence fuelled her anger. "In case you've forgotten my face had a first row seat with your fist!"
"I didn't mean to," he said, not looking her in the eye.
"You don't get to say that," she whispered. "Look at my face!" she demanded but he wouldn't. He stared at the floor hoping it would swallow him up and the more he avoided looking at her the angrier Ella got. "LOOK AT ME!" she screamed so loudly she was sure the whole hospital could hear.
He looked up from shock and guilt flashed across his face as he saw the purple and green bruises that magic couldn't heal on her eyes and scabbed over cheek bone. The lone tear that ran down her face.
"Get out," Ella ordered and he left.
The door closed and Ella collapsed onto her chair, hugging her stomach as she tried to hold the sobs in as the tears fell but a moment later the door opened and Sirius Black was there.
"Fuck, I heard the yelling and then your dad was walking down the hall and fuck," he closed the door behind him and came around to her and then he got awkward, patting her on the shoulder and it all became too much.
A sob finally escaped her lips and she just needed to not feel her heart crushing in her chest. She needed to not feel the pain in her ribs every time she sobbed. She needed to not feel the sting in her cheek bone as the tears fell onto her now cracked open scab. She needed to not feel a god damned thing.
"Do something," she begged gasping through her sobs that vibrated her entire body, grabbing Sirius' wrist. "Please, do something! I can't — feel anymore! I can't, I can't! Please just do something!"
She didn't know what she wanted him to do but it surprised her when he dragged her up and hugged her so tight she almost couldn't feel because she was so focused on breathing under his tight hold.
Rita Skeeter wasn't a name the wizarding world was familiar with on December 31st, 1977. Rita Skeeter was a writer for the Daily Prophet but she wrote the engagement, wedding, births and deaths announcements. Nothing that really put her in the spotlight but on January 1st, 1978 that all changed.
It was by circumstance that Rita had been one of the only one's from the Daily Prophet to attend the New Year's party, it didn't come as a huge shock that Rita was the only one willing to write about it. It had come as a big shock when the attack had been broadcasted on the Wireless Wizarding Network, what hadn't shocked anyone in the Daily Prophet was that their Chief Editor wanted a massive scoop on the entire thing.
Rita had been all too happy to volunteer herself to write about her personal experience and what she had seen. This was her chance to get out of the announcements page. This piece could kickstart her entire career and she was planning on making it big.
Rita roamed the halls of St Mungo's talking to survivors and their families and she stayed awake all night at her typewriter, in the middle of miles of parchments and came up with a piece that she submitted to her Chief Editor at six a.m, just in time for the morning print.
By nine o'clock, everyone in the world knew Rita Skeeter's name and so began her career of scandalised, blown out of proportion stories and the wizarding world loved them.
"She's loony!" James shouted, shaking the paper frustratingly. Of course, the people she wrote about felt differently. "She's called me a 'hero' because I blew open a wall to let people out."
"It is quite heroic," Lily admitted. "Kind of hot actually."
James' eyes lit. "Does this mean you're not mad anymore?"
"Oh, love, I'm bloody furious with you."
"She's crazy!" James continued a sordid rant, questioning Ms Skeeter's sanity. "I mean why zero in on me? And she bloody names me as well! Does she want me to be dead by the end of the year?"
"If only you could walk into Daily Prophet headquarters and ask her yourself," Lily clicked her fingers in mockery.
"Can we not pick on the disabled person, please," James whined. "Lily, I'm distressed!"
"Yes I can see that. Accio," the newspaper flew out of James' hand — "Hey!" — and into the bin, "Which is why we're not going to read that anymore."
James continued to huff and puff and mumble, "Just cause I pushed the stupid woman out of the way just when a curse was about to hit her," like heroic deeds were normal.
Lily sat and listened, nodding her head along to his words in hopes he would move onto a different topic when he didn't, she interrupted him with something that had kept her up all night.
"You know, my favourite part in a book or a movie is all the little things. The things that you don't really think twice about but at the end, it's the big bang moment and everything is revealed and you're just sitting there with your jaw dropped because oh my lord! And everything makes sense," she twisted her hands, felt the tears pricking.
"Lils?" She could hear the worry in his voice and a tear fell. Her leg started bouncing as she tried to build up the momentum to say what she needed to say.
"Nothing makes sense anymore, James," she whispered. "I — when Professor Ollivander knocked on my door and told me I was a witch it was the big bang. Everything made sense. Suddenly, I knew why I could fly off the swing. I knew why I could make flowers grow in my palm. I knew why I could make the door slam without touching it. But now," she shook her head as fat tears slipped down her face. "Now not a god damned thing makes sense. None of it. None of this." She gestured around the room hopelessly.
"Lily, if you're looking for a why…" James trailed off before demanding, "Come here," and with effort he shifted to one side of the bed. Lily looked at him, wiped her eyes and then walked across the room, sliding onto the bed as his arm came around her. At least he could still do that.
"I just, I don't know what to do and I don't know why."
"I don't think we ever will find out why this is happening."
Lily shook her head. "We do, it just seems too silly to accept it." She paused. "You know, the muggles had a huge war in the forties, so huge they called it World War Two."
"That's some war," James admitted.
"It all started because Germany invaded Poland in Hitler's attempt to make more room for the superior race. Hitler didn't like people who weren't German. Jews particularly though that didn't stop him from slaughtering whoever got in his way."
"Why were Jews different?"
"They had different beliefs, believed in a different religion, came from foreign countries and Hitler thought they were an abomination, that they didn't have the right to be in their society. That they were damaging. He invaded homes and countries, created ghettos and death camps where Jewish people were forced to go. They were numbered, herded and slaughtered like cattle." She was quiet for a moment. Reflecting. Trying to figure out what it was she actually wanted to say. "Six million Jews died and I don't think any of them ever got their big bang moment because the reason was because a man with power decided that they weren't worth it and that just isn't enough. It'll never be enough."
James didn't know what to say or do as she sobs shook her entire body. It was hard to imagine that muggles had fought a war so similar only forty years earlier and he wondered if that was how life worked with history repeating in different ways in different times.
"Who won?" James murmured.
"The Allies — not the Germans, after six years of the world's biggest and dirtiest war."
James hugged her tight and said, "But they won and we will, too."
"You can't even walk."
"Hey, no picking on the disabled person, remember?"
She sniffled and smiled softly. "Promise me that you'll get better and that you'll learn that running into battles is not the greatest idea."
"So then you can have your big bang and this can make sense?" She nodded. He kissed her forehead. "I'll walk again, Lily. I promise."
The door opened and Lily sat up, swinging her legs over the edge of the bed and wiping her face with her sleeves.
"Oh, Mia, Monty," Lily greeted. "I thought they wanted you on bed rest."
James frowned, "Mum, Lily's right. You shouldn't be walking yet."
"I'm fine," she waved off sitting down, choosing to not broach the topic of why Lily was crying and Lily was grateful. "And why's the prophet in the bin?" Euphemia asked, picking it out and just like that they were back onto the trivial topic of Rita Skeeter. Perhaps it was easier to focus on the trivial stuff, the stuff that didn't really matter because thinking about the twenty-seven people who died was too hard.
"Because this woman has, has ostracised me to be some sort of hero!"
"I think that's a little far fetched," Fleamont said mildly. "She's painting you as a hero not a dementor."
"All I did was blow open a wall," James grumbled, "A first year could do that."
"And you jumped in front of an unforgiveable for me," Euphemia interrupted, "And no first year would have done that."
"That doesn't make me the — what did she call me again, Lily?"
"The 'People's Hero'."
"No, but it makes you my hero," Euphemia kissed his forehead, "And we're keeping this prophet because even if a first year could do it, it shows that my seventeen year old son was the one to keep his head and actually think of blowing open a wall and I'm very proud."
"Sure, now you're proud that I blew open a wall," James grumbled, "In fourth year, it was all 'that's unacceptable, James, do you blow walls open at home? No, then you shouldn't blow them open at school!'"
"I remember that howler," Lily smirked, "It was school gossip for a week."
"Oh, did you hear that Monty, I was famous at Hogwarts for a week!"
"I'm famous all the time," Fleamont shook his head, "You have to do better than that, darling. Even the People's Hero has you beat and he can't even walk!"
Lily laughed but James grumbled, "I'm not the People's Hero!"
His eyes opened. It felt like years and years of her waiting, sitting in the same spot, waiting for him to wake up and now he was awake and she didn't know if she could force the words out. She'd refused to leave Frank's room after Emmeline had told her. Ella had come, Marlene, Remus, Peter, Sirius and then last of all was Della but she barely heard a word they said.
They had all sat with her for a while, on the opposite side of Frank's bed but Alice didn't talk, couldn't, wouldn't, she didn't know the difference anymore but it was like her mouth was spelled shut because every time she went to say something, nothing came out.
When Lily came it was the worst. She had tears in her eyes and said she knew a little of what Alice was going through because her dad died. Lily said it'll get better with time, the hurt will go away but Alice didn't want the hurt to go away, she just wanted her mum back. She just wanted to hug her mum and tell her, I love you.
The last thing she'd ever said to her mum was bye. Alice had gone over it a thousand times already. Alice had been getting ready to leave for Frank's and she had shouted bye from the front door. Her mum had been in the kitchen.
"Don't apparate drunk!" was the last thing that Alice Vance heard her mother say and it wasn't enough for Alice. It shouldn't have been so mundane, so ordinary. There should've been more meaning — Alice hadn't even responded. She'd rolled her eyes and closed the door, apparating immediately from the front step.
"Alice?" Frank croaked with a wince.
Alice leaned over. "Hi," she whispered but barely anything came out, her throat was dry. She tried again, "Hi."
He frowned. "What happened?"
"You were badly burnt at Flamel Hall. The healers say your burns have settled down considerably and that once you'd woken you'd be out of the woods."
"No, I meant why are you crying?"
She touched her face and said, "Oh." She hadn't notice the slick tears falling down her face. "My mum is dead."
"Oh, Ally," he grabbed her face as small sobs started to wrack her body. She climbed onto the bed and he wrapped her arms around her as she sobbed.
"I don't know what I'm supposed to do."
"You don't have to do anything," he assured her, stroking her hair soothingly. "Just get it all out."
"She — she wasn't even s-supposed to be there!" Alice cried. "I don't - don't un-understand why." Her sentences were interrupted with sobs and tears and it broke Frank's heart to see her crying for her mother like this.
"I hate them," she said fiercely after her crying had slowed down. "I hate all of them."
Frank kissed the top of her head and agreed, "Me too."
He heard it on the radio, sitting next to someone else's unconscious brother. He didn't mind sitting there. It meant he had an excuse not to see James not walking and Ella needed the support even if she kept insisting that she was okay. She didn't have to be and Sirius would be there when she realised that.
The words came, vibrating out of the little box, loud and frantic, no doubt heard by the entire nation twenty-four hours after war was declared. Words that would have people reaching for a neat shot of firewhiskey. Words that would have people adding extra locking charms to their doors. Words that would make sure a nation was never the same again.
The Minister Of Magic is dead.
The Minister of Magic is dead but the Ministry has not fallen.
Words telling them that no one was safe. Not even the Ministry.
How had it only been less than two days?
A memorial was held on January 3rd, the day before the Hogwarts Express was to leave for Hogwarts. Thought of school seemed so trivial to Marlene. Too much had happened. A further four people had died in St Mungo's bringing the total up to thirty-one deaths and it was obvious that the Ministry didn't have a fucking clue what to do.
They all met up for the memorial though. For Alice's mum. For the people who had needlessly died. Marlene pulled out the only black dress she owned. It was simple enough, modest enough. It swept to her calf and the neckline reached her throat. With a flick of her wand her thin blonde strands rearranged themselves into a smooth bun at the nape of her neck and with another flick, her cloak was fastening itself around her neck.
A knock on the door.
"Marly! Hurry up! The McKinnons are waiting!"
"Coming!" she told her little brother. He didn't seem so little anymore though. When he'd been in his first year she didn't have to worry about protecting him, the war that brewed was only noticeable if you paid attention. As they both got older, she tried to shield him — had told him he had nothing to worry about and that they'd be fine. It all seemed so pointless now.
She stuck her wand in her clutch and left the room, meeting the McKinnons and Henry in the front yard.
"Let's go shall we?" Nate held out a hand but Marlene shook her head curtly.
"I'll apparate with Henry."
"Oh, I was going to apparate them," Faith offered.
"That's okay, I've got him," Marlene declined the offer.
"Marlene," Nate clicked.
"Let's go, Henry." She grabbed her brother's hand and twisted on the spot, reappearing in an old cemetery, Peverell Cemetery. It was the only purely wizard and witch cemetery in Great Britain and mainly purebloods chose to be buried there. It was a large lot of land with a large church in the centre.
"Why're you being so weird for?" Henry retorted, dropping her hand once they had landed.
"I'm not."
"You are."
"Shut up," Marlene hissed as the others materialised around them. "I'm going to go find Alice. Stay with the McKinnons!"
She walked off without another word and, annoyingly, Nate followed her. The cemetery was crowded. A sea of black cloaks and coats. Parents keeping a tight hold of children's hands, groups huddling together. Some were crying, some were just talking as if this were just another social event.
She seized up when he grabbed her arm to halt her pace.
"Marls!"
"What?"
He sighed and pulled a hand over his face, looking at her hopelessly. "Let's just go find the others, yeah?" he dropped her arm and walked ahead of her, leaving her to lag behind him.
A shock of red hair startled her out of her thoughts and she called, "Lily!"
The girl flinched and upon seeing Marlene, slumped and said, "Oh, hello Marlene. Nate."
"Hey, Lily," Nate greeted dimly.
"You came with the boys?" Marlene asked.
"Just Sirius," she supplied. "He's looking for Remus and Peter. I'm supposed to be finding you lot."
"Any sign of Alice?" Marlene asked.
Lily shook her head. "We should go get some seats though."
Marlene looped her arm with Lily's as they approached the church together. "You okay?" Marlene murmured.
"We — James can't come to school until they fix his legs and there's not really a time on that."
"Oh, honey," Marlene sighed. "He'll be all right."
Lily nodded. "At least he's not dead, right?"
"Always so morbid, Evans," Black came seemingly out of nowhere, slinging an arm around Lily's shoulders. "Found Ella and Della."
"Ella!" Marlene exclaimed, pulling away from Lily to give her a huge hug. With all that had happened, she'd admittedly forgotten that Ella was going through something but seeing her bruised face … she questioned how she could have forgotten. "Sleepover tonight?" she whispered in her ear. "Please say yes."
Ella pulled out of the hug and nodded discretely. Marlene gave Adaline a kiss on the cheek and asked for Alice but Adaline shook her head. "I was over at their house yesterday," she shook her head. "I offered to come to the house in the morning for Alice but she, she didn't want me to."
"She just needs space," Ella suggested as they started the shuffle into the church, "Time to grieve with her dad and sister … Anything about Frank?"
"He's still in and out but healers are confident he'll make a full recovery," Lily said. "It's just the potions he's taking that are making him so sleepy."
They found seats near the back and only after they'd sat, did they see the remainder of the Vance family. Emmeline and Alice were walking behind their father, arms looped together and Marlene had never seen Alice like that.
She'd changed her hair to it's original deep brown colour — the colour she'd inherited from her mother — and it framed her round face in wild curls. Her face didn't have a spot of make-up on her — the girl who'd miss breakfast just to put some make-up on before classes. She wore a black dress that Marlene had never seen before with a black cloak — she'd never seen Alice wear so much black.
If you didn't know that was Alice Vance walking down the aisle, you never would have known that was Alice Vance. Marlene supposed that's what war did. It changed people. Changed the way they saw the world. Changed their attitude. It may be a little, it may be a lot but no person came out of a war unscathed and that was a lesson they'd all learn.
Marlene could already count the scars on Alice. Her mother, dead and her boyfriend, almost dead. Two prominent scars and she'd never be the same Alice that Marlene had known only three days ago because it wasn't just that the person is gone, it's all the things that should've been. It's the tears a mother would shed at her daughter's wedding. It's the advice a mother would give. It's the support a mother would provide. It's the knowledge of so many what if's and if only's.
Two scars and three days, Alice Vance looked five years wiser.
He wasn't the only one who noticed when she stood up and left the church in the middle of the ceremony. He was the only one who went after her though. The others all offered but Remus had the aisle seat and he was up and away before the others got the chance to follow.
She was pacing on the side of the church, unfastening her cloak and letting it fall to the floor. She looked up as he approached.
"It's getting hot, isn't it?" she asked, her hand rubbing her throat.
"Lily, it's four degrees." He remembered reading that in the Prophet.
Goosebumps pricked at her skin but she didn't seem to register them as she kept pacing. "Is it?" she asked, her hand still at her throat. If Remus didn't know any better, he'd call it clawing. She was clawing at her throat.
"You okay?" he asked knowing the answer must be negative.
"I was just sitting there," she looked at him, "Listening to all the relatives of someone who'd died and I couldn't," she broke off, pacing away from him. "I kept imagining if it had been James and I couldn't," she broke off again and her breathing deepened.
Remus took a step closer and wrapped his arms around her, to keep her warm if anything. "He's fine," Remus assured her but the more he said it the shallower her breaths became.
"But he can't walk and - and what if the healers can't fix him?" she questioned.
"They will," Remus murmured.
"What if he can't do what he wants to do — and if he can't walk he can't play quidditch or — or help you with your furry little problem or, or, or-"
Remus leaned back, keeping his hands on her shoulders, watching as her face turned bright red from lack of oxygen as Lily ranted on and on and finally, he slapped her and demanded, "Breathe!"
She took a breath. The red lessening. Her hand slipped from her throat. She stepped away from Remus and picked her cloak from the floor, fastening it around her neck.
"Lily," Remus said, "I think-"
"What?" she snapped.
"I — have you ever had panic attacks before?"
She shook her head curtly and said, "Don't tell anyone," before walking off back into the church.
He watched her for the rest of the day. Noticed how she smiled tightly at something Sirius said, how quiet she was, how withdrawn. But it was a memorial for people who had died. James could've died but he didn't, though she was obviously still taking it hard.
Peter suggested grabbing a bite and some drinks after the memorial but Lily turned to Marlene and Ella, "I think, I'm just going to go. I said I was going to visit James and visiting hours are over soon."
"Lily?" Remus asked, breaking away from whatever Peter and Sirius were talking about. He gave her a pointed look. Are you okay?
She nodded. "I just need to go."
James looked up when the door opened. He was doing the crossword in the Daily Prophet and she smiled and said, "It's funny, muggles have crosswords too." Despite the morbid dressing, a black dress and a black cloak with a floral pattern stitched on the hems, she looked rather pretty. The black made her hair stand out.
"Maybe that would actually give me a challenge," James said tossing the newspaper aside. She crawled onto the bed next to him and he put his arm around her, letting her nestle her head on his chest. "How was the memorial?"
"Sad. Where are your parents?"
"Healers sent them home. Mum's hip bone is healed, no complications and dad just needs to apply a salve to his burns twice a day," he paused. "Mum cried when she left."
"I don't want to leave you," she whispered.
"You sound like mum."
"I don't want to go back to school."
"You have to," James said sternly. "Now tell me about the memorial because there is no way I'm reading that Skeeter woman ever again."
"What's there to say?" she asked tiredly. "People died. Everyone was sad. A lot of people cried."
"Well, how was Alice?"
Lily tsked annoyed. "How do you want her to be, James? Her mum died."
"Hey, calm down, I know." I was there, he wanted to say but that would just open up a whole other can of worms that he didn't think Lily — or him — wanted to get into right now. "I just meant," he sighed. "Did you speak to her at least?"
She shook her head. "She was with her family and the crowd was too large."
James' eyes flickered to the clock over the door and he waved his wand to turn on the wireless.
"I thought they said you shouldn't use magic in case it drains your energy." She propped herself up on her elbow.
"I turned the wireless on, not produced a patronus."
"James," she said sharply.
"Shh, the news is about to start," he hushed her.
"Good afternoon, folks. I'm Bethany Forbes here with Philip MacKenzie. This morning the memorial for those lost in the New Year's Eve attack at Flamel Hall was held at Peverell Cemetery. Five hundred and eighty-four people attended the memorial, a record number for any service held at Peverell Church. More on the memorial later, in other news, the Ministry elected a new Head for the Auror Office. Albert Fenwick has taken up the position after serving as a senior Auror for seven years."
A man's voice continued on. "Albert Fenwick has worked for the Auror Office for the last fourteen years and is among the most highly regarded with an average of fifty-two arrests per year. His most noticeable cases include the Francaise and Gordon cases for which he was awarded an Order of Merlin Second Class-"
With a wave of her wand the radio turned off, she looked at him. "Maybe I should just wait to come back with you."
James furrowed his eyebrows. "What?"
"I was thinking, that I should just wait to go back to school … just a few days until you're better."
Her eyes were wide and pleading and he wanted to say yes. Stay with me, he wanted to say because he'd like nothing more than quiet days with Lily but he knew better than to say what he really wanted. One of them had to be strong and there were futures to think about — not to mention the fact that McGonagall would never allow it.
"You know you can't."
"Why not?" she asked, resting her head on his chest again. "It's only going to be a few days."
"It could be," James agreed carefully. "Or it could be a week or two or three. The healers don't know yet and you have to go to school. It's N.E. ."
"Right. N.E. ," she said in a tone that worried James. Lily was not one to scoff at academics.
"Besides, are you really going to entrust Sirius to send homework to me?"
She was quiet for an antagonising amount of time before she agreed with a tired, "Suppose not."
"Alright, Evans?" he murmured into her hair.
"I just," she sighed into his chest. "I wish we could skip all of this. I wish we could wake up tomorrow and five years will have passed and everything will just be happy and normal."
A/N: Hello Everyone! Thank you for reading as always!
Please review, follow, fav! It really means a lot to me and it motivates me to keep posting new chapters!
There are only roughly five chapters left of them at school so these last few chapters will be about setting them up for their life out of Hogwarts which I can't wait to start posting because I feel like they all come together as a family a lot more as they deal with harsher realities.
Again, thank you so much for reading! It really does mean a lot!
-Natalie xx