Mark Sloan grinned evilly as Meredith Grey was put under heavy anesthesia. Grabbing a scalpel off the tray of surgical instruments, he slit a small incision on her chest. Finn came rushing in the OR, panting heavily as he held up 2 bright orange basketballs triumphantly.
It was as though Mark had been possessed by a mad scientist because as his current lover handed him the large orange basketballs he cackled madly and began to insert the larger than necessary breasts. The nurses looked apprehensive as he continued with the surgery, they were unsure if this is really what Dr Grey had in mind. A few hours later, Mark was making the closing incisions and he smiled proudly to himself as he looked at the new and improved Meredith Grey.
"Wake up dear" Mark feigned kindness as he gently shook Meredith awake in post-op. Her anesthesia was slowly wearing off, and Meredith awoke, groggy and barely aware of the world around her. "How do you like it?" Mark wanted to be there for her reaction, he didn't want to miss it for anything in the world.
Meredith looked at her blurry surroundings, waiting for things to come into focus before she reacted to Mark's question. As things came into focus she looked down at her chest, her hands felt around the large breasts that were definitely hers, she winced in pain and continued to glance at them. She then proceeded to look up at Mark with an ear to ear smile. "These are perfect!" She squealed.
"Glad you like them." Mark smirked. Now he just had to wait for the reaction of everyone else at Seattle Grace. He walked to the nurses' station and spotted a very distraught Derek. "What's wrong honey?" he asked, setting his anger towards him aside.
Derek was frustrated with the news of all the STD's he had acquired from his stint with Meredith, not only that but he was caught in the exam room with Denny by some nurse's who had called the police and now he was facing charges. So when Derek heard Mark's voice he couldn't help but smile. "Everything is just going wrong…" He said with a sigh.
"Aww honeybunches..." Mark pulled Derek into a comforting hug while feeling up his ass. "Oh look...another thing wrong..." Mark pointed at Burke and the Chief chatting as they walked side by side...a bit too close.
Burke had always looked at the Chief in a way he wasn't supposed to; even while he was with Cristina his gaze would drift over to him if he were in the vicinity. It was something about his tough exterior that made him attractive, also the fact that Preston knew he was a teddy bear only made the attraction stronger. So as he walked alongside his mentor he would occasionally let his hand brush against the Chief's thigh. "Burke what are you doing?"
Burke chuckled uncomfortably. "Chief...I don't believe that I have ever told you how I feel about you?" He let his hand slide from Webber's thigh around to his ass, stroking the area gently.
The Chief wasn't sure how to take this groping, he would be lying to himself if he told himself he didn't like it but he didn't want his colleagues seeing any of this behaviour. Slapping away Burke's hand he led him into an empty patient's room and sighed. "Preston, what is going on? You know you can't touch me like that"
"Oh but I just can't resist..." Burke purred flirtatiously. He had never felt such a strong attraction to anybody before, it was a strange but totally welcome feeling. "You know, I know some secret places in his hospital that we could run off to..."
"Burke…" Richard giggled giddily, never had anyone made him feel this kind of rush of excitement before. Before he had time to answer Burke's suggestion his colleague's hands were furiously exploring his body, sneaking under the top he was currently wearing. "Mmm" Richard groaned in acceptance of what Burke was doing. There was no turning back now.
"So...we doing this?" Burke whispered lowly into his ear, not expecting a response. They both knew what the answer was, and headed off like 2 giggly teens heading off on their first date.
"I wouldn't dream of it" Burke continued to help remove Richard's clothes and kissing him fervently. The Chief was no longer scared about doing this because he knew in his heart it was the right thing to do. Meanwhile, Addison and Izzie had found their own secluded hide out and were busy feeding grapes to each other in amongst the various other things they were doing. "Have I ever told you how hot you look when you wear your hair down?" Izzie said, gazing into Addison's eyes.
Addison smiled. "Have I ever told you how beautiful you are without your clothes on? You should do that more often."
"I would but you know there isn't much privacy in this place" Just as Izzie was about to remove her scrub top to show some skin off to her new girlfriend but just as she began lifting her top up she saw two extremely large ball shaped things bounding down the halls outside of the room they were in. "What the hell are those?" Izzie exclaimed, leading Addison's eye towards where the two large ball shaped things were.
"Holy shit...that's Meredith." Addison couldn't help but burst out laughing. "Oh I bet you Mark did it; he's known to pull off stunts like these."
Neither of them had enough time to hide before Meredith had seen them and had burst through the door, her new and improved breasts bouncing around. Izzie tried to stifle the laughter; they looked as though they would knock Meredith out. "Hey guys" Meredith said in an almost seductive tone, her basketballs nearly popping out of her top.
"Hi Meredith!" Addison greeted brightly, unsure of what else to say. "Umm...I see you're trying on a new look." she said as she eyed Meredith's balled chest.
"Yeah I decided I need to increase my cup size! So what do you guys think?" Addison looked at Izzie who was turning bright red from trying to contain her laughter. Addison elbowed Izzie in the ribs and she looked up, trying to think of a response. "Oh…yeah they are great! Definitely suits you" Addison nodded in agreement. "Yeah, definitely" The situation suddenly became awkward when Meredith pushed Izzie out of the way and took Addison in her arms.
"Come on baby...I know you want these." Meredith growled, her desire burning. She pinned poor Addison up against the wall, Meredith pressing her chest on hers.
Addison was struggling to breath, the pressure of Meredith's now expanded chest was crushing her own and not only that her larger than life breasts were rubbing against her mouth. "fdgfyug" Her words were muffled but Izzie was able to see the desperation in Addison's eyes, Meredith was too distracted with letting her hands molest Addison's body to realize that Addison was struggling to breathe.
Izzie, all charged up for a fight, grabbed Meredith by the shoulders and pulled her away. Meredith looked at Izzie curiously. "Oh Izzie...I'm sorry. I know you're jealous...would you like to go first?"
Izzie's jaw dropped in shock and she let her hand swiftly move across Meredith's face as she slapped her, Addison was gasping and now looking at Meredith with fury in her eyes. A gathering of hospital staff was beginning to form outside the room and Mark and Derek watched as the women continued to fight. "Mark…what did you do to Meredith?" Derek said cautiously, his hand squeezing Mark's ass in the process as they all watched the commotion, no one jumping in to stop it.
Mark grinned mischievously "Hey...she came to me demanding for the boob job. Look at what she paid me in." He pulled out the coupon, handed it over to Derek, who cried laughing.
Mark wasn't impressed by Derek's reaction. "Babe it's not funny, I had hoped she would have at least paid me in money not some coupon that makes me want to throw up" Bailey stormed down the hall and burst through the door, as the woman wrestled, well Meredith smothered the two other doctors with her new assets Bailey began pulling them away from each other. "What the hell is going on here!"
"Well you could always bill her insurance." Derek quickly added as he turned to face Bailey. "Why hello Dr. Bailey!" Derek greeted cheerfully.
"Don't play dreamy with me McDumbass, why hasn't anyone stopped this fight?" Bailey said sternly going to open the door to the room but Mark pulled her back. "And what do you think you're doing?"
"It's a catfight. These things happen all the time." Mark grinned smugly. "Dr. Bailey...are you interested in a boob job? They are my specialty..."
"No you fool, my damn boobs are just fine!" Bailey pulled away from Mark and opened the door just like she had planned and broke up the fight quickly, she pulled Meredith off of Addison and Izzie and looked at the three doctor's with a frustrated glance. "Why are y'all fighting like this!"
"She's trying to kill me!" Addison pointed at Meredith and screamed hysterically. "Get her away from me!"
"Grey, outside now! Addison why the hell would Meredith be trying to kill you?" Bailey was curious as to what the hell was going on.
"She's jealous of her amazingly good looks." Izzie broke in before Addison had a chance to speak.
"Alright Stevens, you out too!" Izzie trudged out of the room sighing, Addison waved good bye to her new found lover before looking back at Miranda. "What the hell is going on in this damned hospital?"
Addison shrugged. "Why are you asking me? First my husband and my ex-lover have an affair, Meredith gets these gigantic boobs and here I am with Izzie Stevens hoping to have a little privacy!"
"What's next? The Chief and Burke get together!" Just as Bailey had said that Burke and Richard were prancing down the hall hand in hand, and Bailey's eyes just widened. "Seriously!"
Addison gasped. "The Chief and Burke?" she asked in disbelief, not seeing what Bailey was seeing. "You're bullshitting me aren't you. Next you'll tell me that Derek dug up Denny Duquette's body to have sex with!"
If things couldn't have gotten any crazier the police came in and arrested Derek. "Dr. Shepherd, you are under arrest for defiling a corpse and vandalizing a grave site" Mark's jaw dropped and Bailey's mouth continued to gape wide open when she watched this. She turned Addison around so she could watch the horror unfold as well. "WHAT THE HELL!" Addison gasped.
Bailey shook her head. "Told ya the hospital's gone crazy." She turned around, only to see Izzie brutally strangling Meredith with her two bare hands.
"Awww Hell no!" Bailey rushed out of the room and broke apart the two interns and held them away from each other. "Seriously, Grey you are to go work in the pit for the rest of the day…you and your new toys are not to hurt anyone any more. Stevens, you..you need to stay away from Addison, she is still married"
"Hey!" Addison pretended to take offense to Bailey's last comment. "My husband is cheating on me, don't I have a right to have an affair too?" She pointed at Mark and Derek, Mark was yelling at Derek for the Denny Duquette incident.
"Derek, I thought you had stopped with all this infidelity?" Derek looked at Mark sheepishly as the police began to cuff him, as they began walking away Derek turned to face Mark. "I'm sorry babe but you were with Finn and I felt lonely…I'm really sorry"
"Aww..." The police officer swooned and put his handcuffs away. "You people in love...all charges dropped! Go have sex now, and don't forget to use a condom" he said as he walked away.
Derek raced to Mark and threw his arms around him and peppered kisses all over his cheeks. "Lets not fight again, I really do love you" Little did they realize that Finn had been walking down the hall with a basket of muffins to surprise Mark but now a lone tear rolled down his cheek and he turned the other way and ran into the stair well.
George was walking aimlessly in the halls, Bailey was too distracted with the all the crazy of Seattle Grace to give her interns their assignments. He walked pass the stairwell and saw a weeping Finn clutching a small basket. He felt compelled to help, maybe it was his nature, or some sort of physical attraction. Regardless, George walked up to Finn, and asked "What's wrong honey?"
Finn tried to hide the fact he was crying quickly when he heard George's sweet voice, he looked up at the man and smiled weakly. His face was all red and blotchy and George knew he had been crying and he placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder and smiled sweetly. "Everything has just been going wrong, first Meredith sleeps with Derek, then Mark goes back to Derek, why doesn't anyone love me?"
George plopped down next to Finn on the stairs and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "No matter what..." he began boldly "I will always love you." He planted a gentle kiss on Finn's cheek. "Baby I want to have your kids..." George whispered in his ear.
Finn didn't feel shocked when he heard those words instead he felt relieved, and he looked longingly at George and returned his kiss with one of passion on the lips, George reciprocated quickly. He had wanted to kiss Finn ever since he'd met him for the first time and he had never imagined that he would be kissing Finn so soon. "George…you're too good for me…"
"No..." George purred. "Come into bed with me..." He pointed to an empty on-call room right across from the stairway. "I'll arouse you like no man has ever been aroused before..." George winked.
Who was he to turn down a man like George, he nodded and stood up and took George's hand. George led him to the empty on call room and slammed him into the bed; there was no need to contain their passion any longer. As George tore into Finn's clothes he began to cry, George became nervous thinking this would be a repeat incident but he didn't know that Finn was crying tears of joy. "Finn…why are you crying?"
Finn shook his head wildly. "No...no...it's not you!" He turned his head to the side and stared at the blank wall. "It's just...nobody has been so nice to me before! George O'Malley..." He took a second to sob "I love you..."
Derek was sitting on the edge of the bathtub holding a pregnancy test in his trailer, it was an anomaly there was no way in hell he could be pregnant but he had all the symptoms, this would either make or break his relationship with Mark. He had already come to terms with the fact that he and Addison were over; she was off having some affair with Izzie Stevens anyway.
He wondered how he was going to make this thing work. If it was indeed positive, he would want the best on his...highly unusual case. And that would mean going to Addison and explaining all the details, which he was quite reluctant to do.
Derek picked up the pregnancy test, it had been 90 seconds like the instructions on the box said and he was nervous as hell. The knot tightened in his stomach and took a deep breath before looking down to see the result of the test.