This story is what I consider an ohmage to Allie's Tales of Irony, so I have used fellow Addek's in the story and the ideas are my own.
Chapter 1

The weather was finally picking up in Seattle, the onset of Spring bringing forth clear skies and sun, still it some how still rained every so often. Addison loved the summer; it was her opportunity to wear shorter skirts and more revealing blouses, all in a hope to attract her husband to her. Stepping into Seattle Grace with her confident face and a look that said 'don't mess unless you want my heel in your throat', interns moved out of her way as she headed to NICU to check on her first round of patients.

As she was putting her bag in her locker she felt her phone vibrating, she thought it may have been Derek to tell her how much he loved him and that he had some shocking revelation and wasn't in fact in love with a certain Whorse by the name of Meredith. She got no such luck, the caller ID read Jessica, which meant it was her younger sister who was calling. Jess was her 19 yr old adopted sister; her parents were cocaine runners and were caught trafficking between Singapore and China and sentenced to death.

Addison's family had adopted her when they went to Singapore for their 32nd anniversary and they saw Jess working in a grocery store and it was love at first sight. Even though their was an 18 year age gap between the two they still loved each other, Addi always made an effort to look out for her younger sister. So she was surprised when she called out of the blue. Bringing the phone to her ear she smiled.

"Hey sis"

"Ugh finally you answer, guess what?"

"What? You finally stop obsessing about JDM?"

"Ah no I'm going to Florida for Spring Break!"

"So that means you are ditching me yet again"

"You can totally come with"

"As if, I'm still trying to get Derek to have sex with me"

"Uh that McDouche, please ditch him and hang with me"

Addison thought long and hard about her sister's proposal and sighed, spring break in Florida did sound like fun, and even though she would be a lot older than most other people there she didn't care. "Fine I'll come"

"Awesome, okay I'm going now I have to pack" She hung up the phone and Addison started to feel giddy about the prospect of going to Spring Break. Deciding she needed to go tell Richard, she was having time off and then find Derek that she was ditching his McLame ass to have sex with younger men. Not that she was but she wanted to see him squirm.

Addi was walking down the hall where she noticed Richard speaking to a nurse, quickening the pace she intercepted him and smiled, her hands on her hips. "Richard" She said with a persuasive smile.

"Addison?" He said raising an eyebrow.

"I need to use some of my vacation time"

"What for?"

"To go to Florida for spring break"

"No simply out of the question"

"Richard get someone to cover for me, I'm going"

"It's not NICU I'm worried about, how am I going to satisfy my clientele without Cobra?"

"Pssh I don't know bring in Kendel, I trained her she is just as good"

"But she is in Florida too…"

"Whatever I don't care, now where is my dick of a husband?"

"That dick of a husband was last seen in the basement"

She thanked Richard and ran down to the basement, it seemed oddly quiet down there, and she couldn't hear the sounds of the underground fights going on. She reminisced about the time she bare knuckle boxed with Meredith and won with a TKO in the first fifteen minutes, Meredith now had a scar on her forehead as a reminder that stealing her husband did not go unpunished.

Addison looked in all the rooms, there was no one in the storage closets as she began to near the end of the hall she felt like giving up then she remembered there was one place she hadn't looked. Walking to the very end she opened the door to Kayli's meth lab, Kayli was an intern who liked to make a little cash on the side by dealing drugs. Addi wasn't into drugs but was friends with Kay, she respected her money making scheme, and Richard approved too, the more drugs she sold the more patients Seattle Grace ended up getting.

Kayli was arguing with her hired help; Tyra Banks who refused to weigh the cocaine. "FUCKING HELL TYRA dghfgyhdfyh I hate you!" Addison laughed so her presence was made clear. Kay stopped glaring at Tyra and smiled at Addison. "Yo what's shaking?"

"Not much Kay, I was wondering if you've see McDouche?"

"Yea he's in the back, said he was looking for some specific product" Addi sighed and went around the back, opening the door to a smaller closet he found Derek leaning over Meh's stomach doing coke lines. He looked up with puppy dog eyes and some left over coke on his nose. "Oh shit, this isn't what it looks like"

"Oh no he dient" Addison said snapping her fingers to either side of her head in perfect Latina woman fashion. The anger in her began to rise and Meh had not yet noticed what was going on, she was clearly coked up to the eye balls and tripping out.

"Woah why is there a fox standing in the doorway?"

Derek sighed and covered her mouth to stop her from speaking, however Meredith was so stoned she was forgetting how to breathe and neither Addison nor Derek realised so there Meredith was turning blue. "Addi c'mon"

"I just came down here to tell you that I'm going to spring break but now I actually decided"

In the background Kay was ranting about how hungry she was and then proceeded to yell abuse. Addison in a swift motion took her four inch Prada heel to Derek's face and knocked him out, which was lucky in a way, because Meredith's mouth was free and she started breathing again. Although that could be perceived as a bad thing, I like looking it at a glass half empty situation meaning it was a bad thing.

Hope you enjoyed it, I know alot of Meh bashing but what the hey. Reviews much appreciated.