First of all, let me apologize for the shortness of this chapter. Second of all, I totally got my picture taken with Robin at Comic Con. Third of all, the title of this chapter was taken from the title of an episode of Lost. And fourth of all, I realize I have yet to say thank you to everyone who's reviewed. Thank you all so much! The reviews I've gotten for this story have been among the best I've ever gotten, and inspire me to write faster. Thanks, everyone!

Disclaimer: I don't own TT or The Forgotten Arm

This chapter is based on the song "Video."

Chapter Seven: Walkabout

Cyborg hadn't been lying when he'd told Robin that Starfire still cared about him. Lying, no. Underemphasizing… Maybe.

The fact was, and Starfire knew it all too well, she still cared for Robin, still loved Robin, just as much as she ever had. And by the same token, she still worried about him just as much as she ever had. She'd hoped that separating herself further from him would ease her anxiety, but knowing that he was still out there, fighting and alone, and without her support, not only increased her concern, it filled her up with guilt.

When Cyborg had returned from Coal City, she'd gathered around him in the common room with Raven and Beast Boy, the latter two barraging him with questions. How was Robin's search going? Was he taking care of himself? Did he say when he would come home? Raven's questioning had been calm but concerned, while Beast Boy's had been more nervous. Starfire had listened intently to what Cyborg had to say, but hadn't offered any queries of her own. And she could tell by the way Cyborg glanced at her that he was waiting until she was gone to give Raven and Beast Boy the full details.

When Cyborg had told them all he knew, the four had gone back to their separate activities. Starfire, standing and walking back toward the elevators, had heard footsteps behind her but didn't have a chance to turn before she felt Cyborg's hand on her shoulder.

"Starfire, really, he's doing fine."

Now she turned to look at him. "Is he really?" Cyborg was about to nod, but seeing the look in her eyes made him reconsider. He knew he couldn't fool her that easily.

"He's doing alright, all things considered. But he's still pretty sure Slade's out there."

"And he still does not know when he will be returning?"

"No."

Starfire let her gaze drop to the floor before looking back up at Cyborg and trying to smile. "Thank you, Cyborg."

Starfire turned back to the elevators and once there, pressed the button to take her up to the fifth floor. When the doors opened she walked down the hallway to her bedroom, closing the door behind her. Her room was cast in shadows, a result of the early evening sky outside being thick with clouds, and a cool breeze flew in from her slightly opened window. Starfire made her way over to the window, and, pulling it closed, her eyes fell on the city on the other side of the bay. Both the tallest skyscrapers and the smallest cars were coated in fog, but the sight of the bustling city called to her. Quickly exchanging her uniform for a pair of jeans and a red shirt, and pulling on a grey hooded sweatshirt, Starfire exited her room and took the elevator back to the ground floor. After placing a hand in her pocket to make sure she had her communicator, Starfire pulled the door open and walked out into the frigid day. The roof was always a calming place to be, but today she wanted a change of scenery. Taking a walk through the city would be a nice disembarking from the ordinary. Flying briefly to get to the other side of the bay, Starfire touched down on the sidewalk and shoved her hands in her jacket pockets to keep off the cold.

If she had had it her way, Starfire would have spent much more of her spare time exploring the city, looking into shops, walking around the park, watching people come and go. But Starfire spent relatively little time in the city for how close they lived. Besides needing to be on constant call in case the Titans' services were ever needed, there was so much else that needed to be done at the Tower. Training took up a few hours everyday, and there were always dished or laundry to do. And besides that, the others rarely expressed the desire to just do the "hanging out." There always seemed to be video games to play, or cars to work on, or books to read, or files to organize. Of course, it wasn't like Starfire never went to the city, just not as much as she would have liked to.

Today there weren't many people just walking around. It was relatively late to be out- a quarter to eight- the clouds threatened rain, and the chilly gusts of wind blew Starfire's hair into her face, making her wish she'd brought a hair tie. But she pressed on, walking through the shopping district, absentmindedly looking in windows as she passed. By twenty minutes after she'd set out, Starfire knew it was a mistake to have come alone. Being by herself gave her nothing to distract herself from her loneliness and anxiety.

Not that being at the Tower was so different- she'd noticed almost immediately that the others were leaving her to her own devices. At first she'd been grateful that they'd left her alone and hadn't overwhelmed her with good intentions. She'd needed the time just after Robin left to give herself over to melancholy and self-pity, but now that already a month had passed she was ready to talk to someone about it. The problem was, though Starfire knew any one of her friends would be willing to listen, they were too close to the situation to see it unbiased. At this point, Starfire didn't even know if she was overreacting. In the big scheme of things was Robin's obsession with Slade, addiction to crime fighting, and leave of absence really that big a deal? The more she thought about it, Starfire was still pretty sure that it was, but she also knew that she needed a second opinion, one that her friends wouldn't be able to give her. Not for the first time since Robin's departure, Starfire wished she knew of other people she could talk to.

"Hey, Starfire!"

Said Tamaranian spun around, looking for who had called her name. Even without her uniform, she knew she was hard to miss, with her red hair, golden skin and large green eyes. But who she saw surprised her, and made her smile.

Aqualad was on the other side of the street, waiting for the cars to pass before running across towards Starfire on the other sidewalk. He, too, was wearing civilian clothes- a pair of faded jeans and a red windbreaker. His long black hair fell just below his shoulders.

"Hello, Aqualad." Starfire had long ago gotten over her crush on him, but could still appreciate how handsome he was. Since first meeting him she'd seen him only a small handful of times, but had been glad when he'd informed them that he was leaving his home in the ocean to move to Steel City. "What has brought you to Jump? Is it not a far way from Steel City?"

"I just came to pick up some equipment. I was thinking about calling you guys, but I figured you had enough to deal with right now without me dropping by." Aqualad, along with a few other heroes near Coal City, had been notified of Robin's residence in Coal shortly after he had left. There were two main reasons Cyborg had made those contacts: First was to ask them to keep the Titans informed if they ran into Robin- none of their contacts had- and second was simply to let the rest of the local heroes know what was going on before they read it in the tabloids. And sure enough, the four or five various Jump and Steel City tabloids had been coming out with almost weekly articles about the situation. "Are you out here alone?" Aqualad asked.

Starfire nodded. "I wished to be alone, but now would be most pleased to have some company, if you do not mind."

Laughing, Aqualad said, "I don't need to be back in Steel anytime soon. Want to take a walk around town?"

"I would like that very much."

The two started walking, a gust of wind causing Starfire to shiver and Aqualad to mimic Starfire and put his hands in the pockets of his windbreaker.

"Why are you out here on such a cold day?" Aqualad turned his head to look at her, raising his eyebrows slightly. Starfire shrugged.

"I wanted to get out of the Tower. I have been spending a lot of time inside and thought it would be a good idea to get some of the fresh air."

They walked in silence for a few moments before Aqualad spoke again. "How are you guys holding up with Robin off in Coal?"

Starfire sighed. "It has been difficult without him. Well," she smiled, "It has been difficult for me."

"Have you been in contact with him?"

"Not as much as I would like to be. The last time we spoke at length it was… not a pleasant conversation."

"There've been a ton of articles about him in the paper."

Looking at Aqualad out of the corner of her eye, Starfire asked suspiciously, "Which paper?"

Aqualad knew just what she meant, and smiled. "The tabloids. You know, the Jump City Watch, the Jump City Star Tracker, the Steel City Globe…" Aqualad counted off three of the major tabloids on his fingers. These papers were notorious among the celebrity-like heroes for twisting the truth or sometimes, if the truth wasn't interesting enough, making up new ones all together. Both the Titans, Aqualad, and all the other nearby heroes made a point of skimming all these papers on a bi-weekly basis, just to make sure that nothing too problematic was being said. But other than that, the unofficial rule was to just ignore everything the tabloids had to say.

"What have you read?" Starfire knew it wouldn't do her any good to know what those slanderous articles were saying, but she felt that if she knew she would be better able to guard against the rumors.

"You know how it is. They say things like Robin's leaving the Titans, Robin's starting a new team in Coal, the Titans threw Robin out…" Aqualad cleared his throat and trailed off. "I know I shouldn't believe anything I read in those papers, and I don't…" Aqualad made eye contact with Starfire, emphasizing his last point, "But they said some stuff about you."

Starfire frowned. She never could understand how the tabloids got all their information. "And what did they say?"

"I believe the headline was 'Titans Find That Love Can't Survive Long Distance Relationship.'"

Starfire looked at the ground. No matter how many times she wore them, tennis shoes always felt strange to her. "That is not how I would have put it, but I suppose it fits."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I am unsure of where to start."

Aqualad smiled. "Start at the beginning."

Starfire smiled sadly. "Do you know of the man called Slade?"

TT

It took over forty minutes, and a much condensed version of the story, but Starfire told Aqualad everything. About the first time they fought Slade, about Robin's stint as Red X, about his apprenticeship. She told him about Terra and her betrayal, about Slade's death, about Robin's obsession and finally, about the dust. She realized that Aqualad knew all this already, at least the basic facts of who everyone was and when the events had taken place. But still she told him everything, because now she was giving him details, now he was listening with a new ear. He was hearing a new side of the story; whereas before he had gotten reports on the subjects from Robin or Cyborg, now he was getting the story from someone who could and would give him the story in terms of heartache and real life. It was no longer cases in a computer, in which facts, dates, and names were spell-checked, edited, and stored away; now it was a story, detailed and with feeling, and the characters were no longer just Titans- they were teenagers, friends.

By the time Starfire got to the point where Cyborg had gone to see Robin, Aqualad was starting to better understand the situation.

"So Cyborg said Robin wasn't doing that great?"

"He did not say so forthright, but it was implied. I know Cyborg is keeping parts of his visit from me, so I do not know how bad things really are."

"What would you do if you did know?"

Starfire shook her head. "I do not think I could do anything. Robin refuses my help at all costs. He will not consider even looking at the City Protector Recuperation Center, he is constantly turning off his communicator, and he is always distracted when he talks to me." Sighing, Starfire added, "I do not think he would let me do anything."

"Did you expect him to be willing to look into the CPRC?" Aqualad asked, using the Center's initials.

"I hoped he would, but truly I knew he would not."

They walked in silence before Aqualad added, "It sounds like the perfect place for him, though, from what you told me about his situation. I mean, it sure sounds like a dangerous obsession to me."

Starfire nodded. "I described Robin's situation to the woman I spoke to at the Center, and she assured me that it is common for heroes to be obsessed with fighting crime."

"And I'm sure it's also common for heroes with obsessions to refuse to get help."

"Do you think so?" Starfire looked at Aqualad, pushing some hair behind her ear. The wind had let up a little, but was still blowing her hair around messily.

"I'm sure. Robin sounds like he's pretty bad off right now, but I don't think he's reacting any differently than you or I would in this type of situation."

Starfire smiled. "I hope that if it was me I would not act this way."

After a moment, Aqualad said, "You wouldn't."

"What do you mean?"

Aqualad shrugged. "You've seen the way Robin's been acting, and you know how much it hurts to see him this way. You wouldn't do to him what he's doing to you."

"I suppose not." Starfire bit her lip. "But what if it is not what Robin is doing to me but what I am doing to Robin?"

Now it was Aqualad's turn to be surprised. "What are you doing to Robin?"

"I deserted him! I promised him I would never leave him alone. I promised him I would be here when he returned! And now I have done the breaking up when I needed to be there for him the most! Now he is all alone again!" Starfire rubbed her forehead. "I promised him I would never leave him alone again."

"Starfire," Aqualad put a hand on her shoulder. "You did what you needed to do for you. If he isn't reaching out there's nothing you can do about it."

"But should I not be the one reaching out to him?"

"I think at this point the ball's in his court."

"The- what?"

"It's a saying. It means that it's Robin's turn to reach out to you. You can keep calling to let him know you're there, but at this point he's not giving you any information and it's just frustrating you to talk to him."

"Then it was not wrong of me to do the breaking up?"

Aqualad shrugged. "I'm no expert on relationships. But maybe that was the push he needed to realize he was moving in the wrong direction."

Starfire frowned. "I still wish it had not come to that."

"I know. It's never easy."

"And I fear that now that I am no longer trying to call him, he will not contact us even if he needs us."

Aqualad looked at her. "What do you think would happen that he would need to call you but wouldn't?"

"He could become injured or require assistance in his search or… something else could happen."

"Something else like…?"
"He still believes that Slade is out there," Starfire explained, "Which means that he would also be led to believe that Slade is still after him."

"And if that was the case…?"

"And if that was indeed the case then I worry that the after-effects of the dust would still be upsetting him."

"You think that he's still having nightmares. Still seeing Slade." Aqualad glanced at her for confirmation.

"It is highly possible, especially since he is dedicating so much time to proving Slade's existence."

"Do you think he'd let you know if he was having nightmares again?"

"I very much doubt it. He wants so much to show us that he does not need assistance and is succeeding in his mission that I fear he would think of the apparitions as a sign of weakness."

"So he'd just… suffer in silence?"

Starfire smiled sadly. "Robin has been suffering in silence for as long as I can remember."

Aqualad laughed and slowed his walking to a standstill. "I need to get going, Starfire. There's a bus stop around here that goes back to Steel City. The ocean's too choppy to swim today."

"It has been most uplifting talking to you." Starfire brought her hands out of her pockets and blew on them to keep them warm.

"Yeah, it was nice seeing you. I should come up to Jump more often."

"I look forward to your next visit."

Aqualad smiled and hugged Starfire. "If you need to talk, just give me a call, alright?"

Nodding and returning the hug, Starfire replied, "I may take you up on that."

Aqualad laughed again and gave her a quick, chaste kiss on the cheek before pulling back. "See you around, Starfire. Good luck with everything."

"Goodbye, Aqualad."

With a final wave, the two turned and parted ways, Aqualad continuing up the sidewalk about a block, and Starfire heading back towards the Tower. The wind was still bitterly cold, and the dark grey clouds threatened to start their downpour at any moment, but walking along the streets of Jump, her cheeks tinted pink from the cold, Starfire realized she was happier now than she'd been in a long time.