Yuffie and the Homeroom Quest of Gayness!
Chapter One: Sora Pt.1
Akikami:KH2 CAMEE OUT YESTERDAY! YEEEEEEEESH! Roxas is awesome, even if I imagine Jesse McCartney every time I hear him talk (twitches). Anyway, I've been meaning to write Kingdom Hearts fic lately. This one will actually have more then one chapter! Yay!
3-30-06
7.35 AM
YUFFIE'S INNER DIARY-THING
ENTRY ONE
I have come up with a frightening hypothesis this morning.
All of the boys in my homeroom are gay.
Today I am going to test my theory on every boy in my homeroom throughout the day.
Boys in my homeroom (15):
-Sora
-Wakka
-Axel
-Roxas
-Cloud
END OF YUFFIE'S INNER DIARY-THING ENTRY ONE
One-Sora
"He-eeey, Sooooora!"
"Uh…. hey, Yuffie. Are you okay?"
Yuffie laughed insanely, throwing her head back holding her sides in a way that made Sora shrink back in his seat. Her head abruptly snapped back forward, startling the poor, unsuspecting boy.
"Of course I'm okay, silly boy," she said. "Why do you ask?"
"No reason…."
"Greeaat…."
The two stared at each other in an awkward sort of silence as Yuffie pondered her plan of action.
'I should probably go for the direct approach and catch him off guard. He won't be able to deny the truth that way!' Yuffie cackled evilly in her head.
"Hey, Sora?" she said innocently.
Too innocently in Sora's opinion, but he let it slide. He knew how nutty Yuffie could be.
"Yeah?"
"…. ARE YOU GAY?"
Silence.
The entire classroom was silent, all staring at the beet red Sora and obliviously blinking Yuffie. One lone person (who we shall never know) snickered.
"What!" Sora exclaimed in shock after everyone slowly reverted back to their previous conversations. "Where did THAT come from?"
"I'm just curious, Sora," Yuffie replied matter-of-factly. "I mean you're so girly and small and are always wearing fashionable clothing and I should know it is MURDER finding fashionable clothing in a straight guy's closet (1). And you're always hanging out with that Riku guy who looks like a hooker if you ask me and-"
"Yuffie! Would you just shut the he-"
"Hello, class!" Jasmine, their homeroom teacher, exclaimed (2), choosing just THAT moment to enter the classroom (ten minutes after the bell rang too, but Yuffie wasn't complaining). Jasmine didn't approve of stifling titles such as Mr. or Mrs. and reprimanded anyone who used such words in her presence.
Even so, basically every boy in Kingdom Middle School (3) ogled her whenever she so much as entered a room. Everyone that is, except for the five boys in her homeroom!
A coincidence?
Yeah, right!
"So class, how was everyone's weekend?" Jasmine inquired.
Yuffie shot Sora a knowing look as she slipped into her seat next to Kairi.
Sora stuck his tongue out and turned back around.
Yuffie was about to retaliate with a more rude hand gesture when a very loud, very love-stricken sigh was emitted from the redhead beside her.
Kairi had her head on her desk as she dreamily watched the back of Sora's spiky head bounce as he nodded to something Jasmine had said.
"Ewwww, do you like Sora?" Yuffie exclaimed under her breath in disgust.
"Huh?" Kairi looked up in a daze. "Oh, hi Yuffie. When did you get here?"
"…. Five minutes ago."
"Oh," Kairi giggled airily. "That's nice."
Right.
"Sora doesn't like you," Yuffie stated bluntly.
"What do you mean?" Kairi retorted. She was now sitting completely upright and alert. "Sora told me he liked me!"
"Sora tells EVERYONE he likes them. He told the little five-year-old down the street that last week."
"Yeah, but-"
"Sora's gay."
Gasp!
"It's not like it's that surprising. I just asked him if he was five minutes ago."
"But, I was in too much in a love-induced stupor to notice."
"Oh."
Both girls sat silently.
Yuffie doodled man into her desktop.
Kairi mulled over her taste in men.
"Lookit the loooove mark my ce-UTE ferret gave me!" Cloud exclaimed to Jasmine after ahe had asked how his weekend went. She grimaced and attempted to look interested in the purple, festering wound on the boy's wrist. "The nurse said the anesthesia from the emergency room should wear off in an hour! I FEEL SO-OO HAPPY!"
Right.
"I always wondered why Sora had such good fashion sense…"
"As did I."
"And why he didn't mind shopping with me…"
"Mm-hm."
"And that picture of that weird silver-haired kid under his pillow that I thought was a girl the first time I saw it."
"I knew it!"
Kairi jumped back at the sudden exclamation, fearing for her life. "Umm…. Yuffie…. are you okay?"
Yuffie sighed, smacking her forehead. "Why is everybody asking me that today? Never mind. Kairi, would you like to join me on my quest?"
"What quest?" Kairi asked.
"My quest to discover the gayness of the guys in our homeroom!"
"Ummmm….."
She looked interested! Yuffie cheered inside head. With another girl on her side, her quest would be even more fun!
Kairi bit her lip, deep in thought.
She looked to Yuffie, who was grinning hopefully at her.
Then, she turned to Sora who was screaming shrilly, "Oh my GOD, Cloud, you got blood on my brand new shirt!"
Yuffie.
Sora.
Yuffie.
Sora.
Yuffie.
Sor-
"Are you almost done?"
"…Sure, Yuffie."
"…. Really?"
"Yup!"
"That's so friggin' great! Do you have anybody in your next class?"
"Axel."
"Great!"
RING!
"Well, I'll see you at lunch Kai!"
"Okay."
Kairi watched the hyper active girl zip out of the room thinking sadly 'What have I gotten myself into?'
3-30-06
10.00 AM
YUFFIE'S INNER DIARY-THING
ENTRY TWO
Kairi has joined my quest that I just decided was a quest ten minutes ago! Together we will prove the gayness of every boy in our homeroom! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-
END OF YUFFIE'S INNER DIARY-THING ENETRY TWO
"Yuffie, are you okay?"
Yuffie attempted to answer through her serious hacking fit to the young, pudgy boy standing awkwardly beside her (4). "Yeah…. okay…."
"O-okay…. BYE!"
"…Stupid 6th grader! That was a test to prove you r loyalty and you FAILED! FAAAAIIIIILED!"
RING!
"Crap! That was the late bell! Nooooo!"
TBC
Akikami: Well, how was that? When I started it I planned on it being a one-shot. But now I think it would be better as a chapter story. Not exactly sure where this is going yet, but I do know one thing…. no bashing (gasps)!
I actually don't mind the girl characters. Some of them will be a bit psycho, but I do that to all my characters, not just the girl ones.
1-my friend said that today. Straight guys have sucky clothes!
2-I don't really want to use Ocs and I want to save the characters for the actual story so I'm just going to use Disney characters that were in the game.
3-this school will be 6th 7th 8th and 9th because I feel like it.
4-guess the pudgy boy!