The Second Horse
"Don't you ever forget that! You are not needed."
(Akito to Rin, Vol. 14)
"Nothing happened... why did nothing happen?" he said his voice shaking. Akki shivered, the look in his eyes, the way he shook as if something truly frightening had happened... or didn't happen according to him.
"Shigure I don't understand, what's wrong?" she asked her voice shaking with fear that she had done something truly unforgivable
"You... Akki ... what are you? Why didn't I ... I hugged you... you're a girl... but I'm still." He said the sound of the door slamming open got both their attention as another man just waltzed in his hair was long and silver and his eyes were a glittering amber, he looked like a girl if Akki squinted.
"SHI-SAN!" he said broadly stopping when he saw Shigure's face and Akki standing across the room looking confused and hurt, and a little surprised by the appearance of such a feminine man.
"Oh my... Shi-san what is the matter?" he asked brushing off Akki's presence and looking at Shigure with concern
"A-Aya... I hugged her..." he said the silver haired man froze
"Nothing happened ... Aya..." he said the man who Shigure was calling Aya looked at Akki
"Didn't transform? But then... does that mean?" Shigure shook his head
"No I still have it.. I can still feel her presence... no... I'm still cursed..." he said the silver haired man stepped forward and looked Akki up and down
"Shigure her eyes... don't they remind you?" he said softly almost inaudibly, Shigure nodded
"Her eyes remind me of someone but I can't remember who." He said Aya sighed
"We were just kids when it happened, six or seven the three of us... when a man named Kokuzoku Sohma was locked away by Akito, his wife and child were sent away... I herd a rumor that the child was..."
"The second horse..." Shigure breathed, suddenly remembering everything, watching as Akito told the woman holding a oddly silent baby that she had to change her name to Kodomo... the child's name would be Akki, she was a demonic accident, it was the child's fault that the woman had to be separated from the child's father, her lover.
"W-what are your two talking about? My name? what is this all about?" Akki asked they turned to look at her she looked close to tears, and Shigure felt an overwhelming urge to hug her tightly and comfort her, he held back.
"Miss, have you ever changed form when you were really sick or when you hugged a boy?" Aya asked simply, Akki frowned
"I'm not allowed to hug boy's mother said never hug people who don't love me, and that nobody but her loved me..." she said Aya frowned that was one way of preventing a girl from hugging people.. even if it did emotionally hurt them.
"I remember though... a dream I hand once, when I was very sick with pneumonia. I had a dram that I became a horse... I was at home for holidays, mother screamed and screamed but I didn't understand what I had done wrong, the she hit me with a book... I woke up in the hospital... I asked Mother about the dream but she said I was really sick and it was simply and illusion caused by my fever." She said Shigure frowned
"She hit you with a book!" he demanded suddenly wishing he could meet this woman and hit her with a book and see how she liked it.
"It was only a dream caused by the fever..." Akki said withdrawing a little frightened by his sudden anger. The man Aya set a gentle hand on her shoulder he had a light but warm smile
"Miss Akki, that wasn't a dream, you are a Sohma... and apparently also cursed by the spirit of the horse." Akki looked at him confused,
"Cursed? By a horse... I don't get it? I just... please I already know I am a worthless demon don't tell me I'm a curse as well." She said stepping back Shigure and Aya seemed surprised Shigure stepped forward but she backed away till she hit the wall her eyes wide with fear. Her hands over her ears sudden fear her mothers face flashed through her mind the woman's voice ringing in her ears
'Worthless demon!' 'Horrible child!' 'You are not my daughter! It's all your fault!'
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry, stop yelling please! I know what I am I know it's my fault!" She yelled her hands still over her ears, why could she still hear the woman screaming? Why can't she make her happy? Must she die twice?
"I promise! I'm dead I'm dead, you did it your self you know I'm dead Please stop!" she screamed her back touched the wall she gasped looking up Shigure blinked in surprise tears were sliding free from her crimson eyes
"I'm sorry!" before Aya or Shigure could move, she was running the doors still open from Ayame's grand entrance she ran through them her feet bare her hands over her ears. Dark clouds had rolled across the sky and rain was slowly starting to fall.
'I hate you!' 'It is all your fault, you will be judged by god for what you have done!' 'DIE!'
The rain was falling faster now and she had no endurance, no matter how upset she was, she couldn't run forever. Through streets down alleys past houses and stores, cars driving past soaked her as they drove threw puddles. Now she is soaked and covered in mud, her feet hurt but she can't feel the pain that stabs at her not even the stitch in her side that fills her with pain with each breath she takes.
'Look at you!' "Your face disgusts me!' 'It's sick! That such a demon was born!'
She wouldn't stop, she couldn't stop, if she did mother would find her, had to keep running! Had to get away! Had to stop the yelling! Why can't she escape! She stumbles and falls the sidewalk tearing the skin on her arm. As she lays there for a moment a dog runs over sniffs her then runs off. She tries to stand putting her hand back over her ears; she can't understand why the yelling won't stop.
Collapsing to her knees no one paid attention; they were all searching for shelter. Her hands were still over her ears, trying to block out the yells, her eyes closed but her mothers face loomed there, flickering and moving like an idiot was holding a camcorder and recording the words. No matter how many tears run down her face, no matter how many times she apologizes she'll never be loved by her mother unless she is dead.
"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry... I know it's all my fault; I only wanted you to be happy... I only wanted you to hug me again... not send me away..." she said her voice shaking she looks up at the sky trying to hide her tears with the rain
"Akki?" Soft clicks of wet wood on the soaked concrete then a robe on her shoulders
Shigure had followed her a few stray dogs running to him and noticing he needed help, he had sent them off ahead to help him find her Aya was running behind him his silver hair fluttering behind him even with the rain.
"What's with all this rain? It's like the sky knew such a dramatic thing was going to happen." Aya said
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She said chocking on a sob, the rain had plastered his dark hair to his face and his robes were heavy from the water but he didn't care. It was the shaking girl in front of him was who was important.
"Why am I crying...? I've never broken down like this before... I've tried so hard to be a good girl." She said her hands touching her face, finally she stopped trying to stem her mothers words. She touched brushed her cheeks lightly with her finger tips, she couldn't even be the emotionless demon her mother had wanted her to be. he knelt beside her the wavy black locks of her hair were every were he was careful not to stand on any of it
"It's not your fault, you're a good girl... you have been strong if you haven't cried before now, but some people need to cry, when things are difficult, when things hurt and stab at them... you need to cry." He said she looked up at him her eyes red and puffy from crying before he knew it she launched at him grabbing the front of his robes and burring her face in his chest. He was startled but this time he carefully placed his arms around her one hand resting gently on her head the other comfortingly on her back.
"Don't worry, You can cry..." he said softly, but even as they sat there in the rain he couldn't stop the plain fact, that now she was here and her true self was known, she would have to see Akito... that would not end well.