' Baby please, don't do this.'
The words thundered through my mind as I woke up in a cold sweat. I panicked as I looked around, only to be calmed by realization that I was in fact at home, in my own bed….I was safe. Why can't I forget this, move on and start again. I've tried but it's hard, so hard. Subconsciously I move my hand onto my stomach and rub it gently, my slight bump reminded me of everything I was so badly trying to forget.
I guess I should explain. I'm Sara, Sara Sidle to be precise. I'm 30 years old and three months pregnant with a child I never really wanted. I was happy, engaged to the most amazing person in the world, sure we worked together in Las Vegas but it only made us stronger, we had our fights but doesn't everybody! Everything was so perfect until one night in December.
/flashback/
'I saw the way you were looking at her! You were checking her out.'
'No honey I wasn't…I was just being friendly.'
'That's crap and you know it, I saw the way she looked at you earlier, you know her from somewhere.'
'Ok so I know her' I shout much louder than I had anticipated to.
'Where from, she your other lover you've kept hidden away somewhere?'
'She's….well…from a case.'
'I can't believe this! You've been seeing a suspect from a case?'
'I never said she was a suspect and I'm not seeing her, I swear it's the truth.'
'It's over, I don't want you in my life anymore.'
'Baby please don't do this'
/End of flashback/
I was so angry that I went straight to the bar, had several beers too many and ended up going home with some guy. I haven't seen him since, I could find him if I wanted to but I don't. All I want is her back.
We still work together and sometimes I catch her looking, looking like she knows what she's missing…maybe it's just wishful thinking but sometimes I think she wants me back. Up to now I've been able to keep the baby a secret, sure I've cut out all the coffee and junk I'd have in the break room. No one has said anything but I'm sure they have noticed, after all we are crime scene investigators. Over the last few days I've started to show so it won't be long until I have to reveal the secret I've kept locked away for so long…..too long even.