It's been several long weeks since the shooting and the mood at work is nothing to look forward to. Catherine is becoming extremely depressed as both Grissom and Nick seem to be avoiding her as much as possible. Sara is not back to work but has been out of hospital for a few days, Catherine however has only spent about thirty minutes with her girlfriend in this time, most of which was helping her up the stairs and into bed. Catherine kicks Sara's locker in frustration and turns to her best friend sitting beside her.

"I'm sorry Warrick I just needed to get that out."

"Hey don't apologize to me. You might wanna hold onto that until Sara sees that big dent in her locker."

"I'm sure that will be the last thing on her mind by the time she sees it."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Work's getting to me, it's like everyone is gossiping behind my back. Grissom and Nick know something about Sara but neither one is talking and Sara well I've been avoiding her."

Warrick laughs.

"You guys live in the same house, share the same bed, how is it even possible to avoid her?"

"That couch in the break room is rather comfy you know."

"Oh Cath…"

"I just need to know what the whole damn world is hiding from me, the longer I'm kept in the dark the worse I keep thinking this something must be."

"I swear to God Cath if I knew I would tell you but no one is telling me either."

"Because they know you'll tell me."

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Standing in front of the mirror looking at my exposed belly isn't doing me any good. Since I found out about this baby my world has been turned upside down. I got back with Catherine even though I knew I was pregnant, I didn't even tell her, didn't give her a chance to walk away before we even started again. I did try, once, maybe twice but the moment was always taken away. First by Warrick and the second time by Catherine not taking no for an answer, she can be….well very persuasive.

I don't remember much of the shooting or of the surgery but they say some guy confessed, I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, story of my life huh! I remember the hospital though, that's something I'll never forget.

I've been home three days, I think I've slept through most of them. Lindsey's been running around getting me stuff, Catherine's been tied up in work and Nick keeps ringing my cell…I think he knows. I need to tell Catherine but I'm so scared of losing her, I'd rather just run now and not let her ever find out. My secret could ruin her, hurt her beyond repair and I'd lose everything. I know running isn't the answer but right now it seems like a good option.

I love her so much, more than anything in this world, I love Lindsey too and I will love this baby with all my heart. Everything could be so perfect, Catherine and I bringing up our two beautiful children together, having our wedding just like we planned, working the job we love and living happily ever after….well hey I can dream, can't I! I'm 17 weeks tomorrow, it's all gone so fast, I just wish I could turn back time…..

Sara puts down her pen and closes the diary before placing it back in her bedside cabinet. Slowly she eases herself up from the chair and heads to the bathroom to shower all her troubles away. Today would be the day where she finally told Cath the truth.

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"Sara? Baby you home?"

"Mmmm I'm up here." Sara calls down the stairs.

Catherine walks up the stairs and into her bedroom, Sara is sitting on the bed with only a towel wrapped around her. She smiles up at her girlfriend and motions for her to sit down next to her. Catherine ignores her and leans against the doorframe suddenly noticing that Sara has put on a lot of weight.

" I want you to tell me whatever it is that is going on. I can't handle this anymore. I know the guys at work know, they all avoid me and if I do manage to catch one of them they go quiet at the mention of you. Honey what's so bad that you just can't tell me?"

"It's just I should have told you before we decided to try again, I tried in your office, remember? I wanted to tell you something but Warrick interrupted us, he was so happy that we were back together that I just got lost in the moment."

"I remember but there's been plenty of times to talk to me since then, we were alone a lot at the hospital."

"I was tired and it didn't seem like the right place. I just want you to know that I haven't told anyone, I'm not sure how the guys found out but it wasn't from me. I always wanted you to know first. Now I'm just scared that you don't love me anymore."

By this time Sara is crying and Catherine breaks down at the sound of her lovers words. She sits on the bed and pulls Sara into her arms, gently stroking her back.

"Don't be stupid, I do love you, I'm just a little mad and at the same time concerned and worried and every other emotion under the sun. I've been avoiding this conversion because I'm so scared that I can't handle whatever it is you have to tell me."

Catherine and Sara remain in each others embrace, stomachs pressed together and Sara's head nestled tiredly into Catherine's neck, neither want to break the moment as they both fear the words and reactions which will follow the conversation neither one is prepared for. Sara opens her mouth to speak but is cut short as she feels a kicking movement in her stomach. Hoping Catherine hasn't felt it too she closes her eyes and her heart sinks as she feels Catherine move away from her, it was too late, she'd felt it.

"Oh God Sara…"